5 things i HATED about my Japanese EX Wife - Dating in Japan

As some of you may know, I used to be

married to a Japanese woman back in 2018

until 2020, and being married to a

Japanese woman was probably one of the

most interesting experiences of my life,

but also probably one of the worst

relationships I've ever been in, and it

still haunts me to this day.

So Japanese women, as most of you may

think or know already, they can be very

cute on the outside, which is why a lot of

men from the West want to go to Japan to

get a Japanese girlfriend, me included.

I used to be like that.

But behind the facade of cuteness, they

can actually be quite conniving and

spiteful on the inside, which was

something I had to learn the hard way

through 2 years of this failed marriage.

So things started off pretty innocently.

Met on Tinder, went on a few dates, moved

into her place after about a week or 2 of

knowing her, and that's when the

relationship became very serious.

And then when my tourist visa was nearing

an end, we decided to get married.

It was her idea, by the way, to get

married, not mine.

I was not actually planning or looking to

get married at that point in my life.

But my life wasn't really going anywhere

at the time.

I was living with my parents constantly,

and I thought maybe getting married

wouldn't be such a bad idea.

Turns out I was pretty wrong about that.

For some reason, there was like a massive

difference between dating her and being

married to her.

When I dated her, she was such a nice,

sweet lady, very gentle and kind.

And then when I was married to her, she

just kind of turned into this angry person

who was just very mad all the time over

pretty much nothing.

I think one of the most disturbing things

about her during the relationship was

probably the way she would weaponize other

men against me.

If she was mad at me, she would use other

men to get back at me, to get some kind of

revenge.

I can think of at least 3 different

examples of this off the top of my head.

So example number 1, we had some kind of

argument, and then one morning she left

her phone on her pillow as she got up to

go for a shower, and she accidentally

forgot to lock her phone.

So I saw the phone was unlocked, and I saw

her going to the shower, and I quickly

tapped the screen to prevent it from

auto-locking, and I had a little snoopy

snoop, and I looked through her messages.

And guess what I found?

I found that she had been flirting and

texting with one of her previous friends

with benefits that she had for over a

year, by the way, when she was in her

first marriage.

So she was texting this friends with

benefits, the Australian guy, as some of

you may remember.

And let's just say the things they were

talking about weren't exactly very

friendly.

Apparently she was complaining that the

sex with me was very boring, and he was

trying to give her ideas, and he was also

trying to hook up with her again, as you

can expect from a friends with benefits.

And then I'm scrolling through the

messages, and the most shocking message is

the one where she says, I miss your dick.

And she said this when we were together,

when we were just in bed together.

It's actually kind of messed up.

So she comes out of the shower, and I

confront her about it because I'm like

really shaken up, and I'm very angry, and

I can't keep this shut inside of me, or I

can't keep it as a secret at this point.

So I confront her, and instead of

apologizing and being apologetic about it,

she gets mad that I was on her phone.

She says, why were you on my phone?

Like, no sorry, no, you know, trying to

explain why that happened.

Just getting mad at me because I had the

audacity to look through her phone, as if

that's the biggest problem here.

And then example number 2, back in 2019,

after my father passed away, I went back

to England for the funeral arrangements

and everything.

And then after he passed away, I decided

to go backpacking through Europe to try

and find myself, try and find inner peace,

and kind of go on a spiritual journey.

And guess what she was doing in Japan

whilst I was backpacking through the

foothills of Germany and Europe?

She was actually going on dates with other

men.

She admitted to me herself she went on 5

dates with 5 other guys, and she admitted

that she just didn't really like any of

them.

She admitted that she just couldn't really

find anyone she liked more than me or who

was better looking than me, and she still

thought I was the best partner out of all

these other dates she went on, which I

guess was kind of nice.

Then one day when we were having an

argument, to get back at me, she then

brings up one of these dates and tells me

that she brought one of them back home to

our place, by the way, and banged him in

our bed whilst I was in Germany on my

spiritual awakening journey.

Now, I don't know if this was actually

true or not.

She might have just made it up to hurt me.

But as she was telling me this

information, she had this kind of evil

grin on her face, as if she was getting

some kind of satisfaction and pleasure out

of hurting me by basically implying that

she cheated.

I just think it's really messed up to get

back at someone you supposedly love by

telling them that you basically cheated

with another guy.

I mean, what kind of sick person would

even pretend to have cheated and gone on a

date with another guy for the sole purpose

of trying to hurt you?

It's just kind of psychopathic.

And then example number 3 would involve

one of my older friends when I was in

Japan.

The Hong Kong guy.

Okay, so he wasn't really a friend.

He wanted to be my friend, but I wasn't

really interested in being his friend.

So what happened again, me and my ex-wife

had a big argument.

And then what does she do?

She goes and has dinner with the Hong Kong

guy because he actually invited both of us

out to dinner.

I said no, but then she went anyway

without telling him that I wasn't coming.

So it wasn't really his fault because he

didn't even know that I wasn't coming.

It was completely her fault.

So she goes for dinner with Hong Kong guy

whilst we're having this massive argument.

She comes home really late and she doesn't

tell me where she went.

I just assumed she was out with friends.

I didn't realize she was out with a Hong

Kong guy for like 5 hours.

I didn't find out she was out with a Hong

Kong guy until the next day, and I only

found out because she was watching a

YouTube video on Hong Kong guy's channel

of him and her together doing some kind of

video Q&A thing on his channel.

And I was like, that's weird, I don't

remember filming a video of Chihiro?

Why is there a video of Chihiro?

And it turns out he was the one who filmed

it.

And that's how I found out that she went

with him for dinner that night.

And obviously I was really angry and we

had this massive argument over it.

And she didn't think she did anything

wrong because she was like, oh, he's my

friend, I can go and see friends if I

wanted to.

You were invited.

Yeah, I was invited and I said no.

If I say no to the invitation, that means

you also don't go without me because he's

my friend.

Not your friend.

And then the viewers I had back then all

started to try and gaslight me into

thinking that it's okay if she goes and

hangs out with a friend, she doesn't need

my permission, when she knew full well she

was only doing that because she knew that

it would piss me off and she was like

getting some kind of revenge against me.

So they filmed, I don't know, hours and

hours and hours of YouTube content during

that dinner.

They filmed for like 5 hours.

They split the 5 hours of footage into I

don't know how many videos, almost 50

videos, 10 minutes long.

And he released the videos over a period

of time, and it was all just basically her

bashing me and saying how communication is

difficult with Daniel and the marriage is

not good and he doesn't care about other

people, you know, blah, blah, blah,

whatever.

She said she felt sorry for him because I

used him for content and then didn't

really help him out much.

So she was thinking, oh, it's okay, you

can use me for content since Daniel won't

help you and then help him get some views.

And then she also— yeah, after we got

divorced, after we separated, she then

started to livestream with him almost

every week, a couple of times every month.

And this went on for over a year.

They would constantly livestream together

and the entire livestreams were just the

two of them bashing me, making fun of me,

saying my Japanese isn't very good when

it's damn well a lot better than the Hong

Kong guy's Japanese.

And it's just like nitpicking and

criticizing me over every little thing.

She would say stuff like my skin's bad,

this and that's bad.

And then the whole streams for a year was

just her hating on me, basically.

It was just kind of messed up.

And this finally ended in 2021, a year

after we got divorced.

So it was kind of pathetic, really.

And then after she finally moved on, it

turns out she never actually hung out with

Hong Kong guy or ever messaged him again.

Because I met up with Hong Kong guy again

last year, and I asked him, so when was

the last time you actually talked to

Chihiro?

And guess what he said?

He hasn't talked to Chihiro Since the last

livestream they did.

So, so much of being friends, such great

friends they were.

She basically was just only using him to

get back at me.

And then my idiot viewers back then were

like, Daniel, Chihiro and Hong Kong guy

can be friends if they want.

Yeah, such great friendship that was.

Only basically a transactional friendship

where he was using her for views and to

get some donuts, and she was using him

because she knew it pissed me off by

helping him to get views.

She's so Petty.

And then she tried to start her own

YouTube channel making like a travel

vlogging in Japan channel, and it flopped.

But before it flopped, she did try really

hard to poach my viewers.

She made a Discord and she was like trying

to promote it to my viewers, saying that

she was going to use my viewers to

springboard her channel.

And then she made a couple videos, some of

them got like 10,000 views, and then

dwindling down to 5,000, 3,000, 2,000.

It just didn't work out.

Without the drama or me in the picture, no

one really cared about her stupid, boring

channel and she gave up and she hasn't

made any new videos on it in years.

But for some reason she has an Instagram

where she posts her travel pictures, which

she is obviously going traveling with

another guy because no one goes to these

kind of places with friends or their

family usually.

Usually they go as like a date with a guy

and obviously there's someone taking her

photo unless she's using a tripod, which

is unlikely.

So she's going to all these places that

she took me to when we were together,

posting on her Instagram where her only

followers on Instagram are basically all

my viewers because she doesn't have any

kind of following or anything.

She's just some random Japanese woman that

no one knew or cared about until I made

her famous with my YouTube channel.

So she keeps posting to her Instagram, uh,

pictures of her traveling to the followers

who are basically all my viewers, knowing

full well that I'm gonna see these

pictures.

I don't think that's done coincidentally.

And then the thing that grinds my gears

the most is that last year I went to Japan

again hoping that maybe we could meet up,

maybe we could hook up, you know, like old

memories, bring back old memories.

Because, you know, she's the kind of

person who's okay with having friends with

benefits.

I thought maybe we could be friends with

benefits.

But guess what she does instead?

She reports me to the police, and the

police come to my place and they take me

to the police station and interrogate me

and accuse me of stalking and harassment.

Which I disagree with still.

I just thought, you know, a lot of time's

passed since we were divorced and the

ugliness of the fighting is over, but

maybe there's still something there and we

can reconnect.

And I just find it very unfair that she

would not be friends with benefits with me

just because we had a marriage and it

failed and she has moved on, doesn't love

me anymore, whatever.

But she's okay with being friends with

benefits with this Australian guy and he

didn't have to commit anything.

He didn't have to be in a committed

relationship with her or be married with

her.

He was able to just have his cake and eat

it and didn't have to, really sacrifice or

compromise anything.

And I thought that's extremely unfair.

How come it's okay for Australian guy, the

friends with benefits, to get away with

it, but I don't get the same treatment?

So yeah, that's my experience being

married to a Japanese woman.

Extremely stressful, extremely traumatic,

left me with a lot of bad memories, and it

just ended with pure ugliness involving

the police.

When an ex starts threatening you with

police involvement, that's just a low

blow.