Old YouTube Livestreams/20171003 Going to Dennys in Japan ALONE [7OoL4Q8Um6I]

Hello? Hello?

I'm hungry. Is anyone else hungry? Is anyone else there? So today's mission, we're going to try and find a restaurant that I can enter. And we shall eat food. Because I feel kind of disappointed about yesterday when I wanted to go into a restaurant but I couldn't. So we'll try again today. But we seem to be at some kind of park right now. Oh, there's a Lawson over there. The sun's setting. It's pretty busy right now. Everyone's going home from work, from school. And it's slightly windy, so it's not great streaming conditions. Too many people, sun's blinding me, and it's windy, and there's a lot of traffic, so we're not off to a great start. I'm not really sure which way to go. Where are the restaurants? The kind of restaurant I'm looking for is the place where they have a ticket machine and you can just order your food with a machine instead of having to talk to the person who works there. I saw one of those yesterday, that tempura place. Maybe I should have started the stream right before I found the restaurant. We're gonna be walking around for a long time before we find somewhere good. We'll just walk aimlessly, see if we can find a good place, or we can go into this park. Look at this guy walking. He's like he's marching. Ba dum bum ba dum. I used 2.5 gigabytes of data on yesterday's livestream. The 4-hour livestream cost me 2.5 gigabytes, and I only have 30 gigabytes for this week. Oh look, there's something over there. Is that Skia? Oh, we're going to Skia! I'm fine with a skier because you can just walk in there and then you use the ticket machine, hand over the ticket, you sit down, you eat. Nice. I was worried we were going to walk around for an hour trying to look for a restaurant. Nice find, guys. My hair's all fucked up because of the wind. I straightened it nice and straight I came out and it was looking— it was looking perfect, and then I walked out and the wind just messed it all up. Doesn't look too bad, I guess. No one cares anyway. Only I care. No one else cares, do they?

I don't know.

I used to come to this park with my ex-Korean girlfriend. There was this one time when she was angry with me and she rode her bicycle here, and I followed behind her to see where she was going, and she came here, and I was just riding my bike. I'm so sorry. bicycle right behind her, trying not to be seen by her. She said she knew I was following her.

What's that noise? Not many people today.

Is there only five of you watching? Jesus Christ! Nearly five thousand subscribers. 1,000 subscribers and all I get is 6 people watching.

Sucks.

Time zones. I hate time zones. Where's that skier place? I think it was over there. I wonder if I livestreamed on YouNow, would I get more watchers? Or if I streamed on Twitch? But no one knows me on Twitch, so I would have zero watchers anyway. Where's that scare face? I think it was this way. Oh shit, do I have money? I think it's really late in America, maybe midnight or 1 AM. Come on, where are the American peeps? The majority of my subscriber base. This isn't even Japanese money.

1,000 yen.

I don't know what kind of money this is. Do I need coins or can I use notes? It's really tricky doing livestreaming in Japan and doing it at a reasonable time for American people. Around now is a good time for me because it's in the evening. I guess the best time would be midday in Japan, but I'm sleeping then. What time is it in the UK? I guess it's around 10 AM? UK? Anyone from the UK? 10 AM. Oh, we lost Skier, but we found McDonald's. I don't want to go to McDonald's. Where did the Skier place go? I swear it was over here. Oh, it's behind us. Okay, let's cross the road and then double back. We're going to a restaurant. I've never been to a restaurant by myself in my entire life. 28 years on planet Earth, and this is going to be a first-time experience. No, no, no, no, no. 大阪にいるって知ってるじゃん。前行ったし。Crossing the road. Look at the McDonald's, it looks so cute.

The building.

I don't want to go into the restaurant just yet. I want to wait until there's more people. Can we get 50 people like yesterday again? We'll walk down here a bit more until— I'm not that hungry, actually. It's only 5:30, but I haven't eaten anything today. I woke up at 1 PM. I was so sleepy. I woke up at 10 AM. And then I fell asleep again, and I woke up at 11, and then I fell asleep again, and then I woke up at 1 PM. Yesterday was pretty popular. 50 to 60 people is quite a lot for me. Usually it's around 30. The most I ever had was about 90 people watching a livestream. That was when I clickbaited with my girlfriend. It's not so hot today and it's not raining, which is good.

It's good.

Hey, look, there's a Denny's! Isn't Denny's American? What kind of food do they have at Denny's?

I don't know!

Denny's. I've never been to Denny's. What are they doing over there? Physical activity, no thanks. Oh look, there's life, a different one. We can go into life, I guess. Kill some time. Build up some appetite. Hunger. What's over here?

Ooh!

Is this a baseball stadium? Oh no, I'm gonna get copyrighted again. Bloody music. Where am I going? It says in the video title. We're going to have dinner in a restaurant all by myself. The sun's setting. It'd be nice if we can find a nice place to see the sunset, nice and high. Do I believe in God and Jesus?

No.

Of course not. Religion is just a waste of time. Religion is just a way to brainwash the masses who can't think for themselves. We're going into life. What are you doing? Okay, hair's fixed. Go, go, go! That's what the mirrors are here for, to fix your hair. Why else would they have mirrors? Fresh meat. Let's go upstairs.

Okay.

I want to get out of here.

How do I go back down?

1円分としてレジで。 If I was trapped in a room full of mirrors, I would get naked, start admiring myself. I did that in the airplane. You know when you go into airplane toilets, it's pretty much mirrors everywhere on all of the walls. I just go into the toilets of the airplane and then I start taking down my trousers and having a look. It's really arousing to masturbate and then watch yourself do it from behind in a mirror. Have you tried it? You guys should try it sometime. I'm not gonna go bald. I'm nearly 30 and I've still got all of my hair. All of my uncles are not bald from Malaysia. All of my English uncles are bald, but my Malaysian uncles, they still have all their hair. Open! What was that? I nearly broke the door. Just because I touch my hair isn't gonna make it fall out. If I started pulling it, then maybe. If I pulled my hair out, it'll just start growing back out again. I'm 5 foot 9. Should I say 9? 5 foot 8 and a half. We can round it up. When I wear shoes, I'm 5 foot 9. Gives me a few inches. No one cares. I'm walking around talking to myself in English and no one even looks. Or watch this person. We can be talking and then they don't even look. See, they look straight ahead. No one gives a shit. What's that noise? Are those birds? I'm not blocking Noreen. Noreen, are you a girl or a guy? I can't tell by that name. Noreen donated to me last time. Noreen's an ally, an ally of the Hiding in My Room channel. Oh look, Family Mart! We need— where was Skia? I think it's behind us, so if we turn left and then left again, we should be able to make our way towards Skia. Hey, look, an orange car! All of the cars in Japan, they seem like they're either black or white or silver. Although there's a red one. Feels like it's rare to see colored cars. We're just waiting for a few more people. Then we're going to Skia. I kind of wanted to see the sunset as well. It's somewhere over there.

It's beautiful.

People kept saying I was whinging about Japan too much, saying that I hated Japanese culture. I don't hate it, I just think some of it's kind of silly. Some people were saying that I hate Asian men because I said that I think that Japanese guys are a bit boring. Just because you think something's boring doesn't mean you hate it. Why is this place called Halloween? Halloween. I should write a book about my travels. Why? I've made videos about my travels. Isn't that better? My little finger's getting stiff again. Look, it just gets frozen like that. So I use my little finger to support my phone when I'm holding it. Shit, there's a cute girl. Their uniforms are so cute. They're so cute. A little mini skirt and the long sleeve cardigan. Where's that bloody scare? Oh, Denny's is over here. We'll have a look at Denny's, see what they sell. There's hardly anyone in there.

Yeah, there's not many people.

We're scoping the place out. She's wearing a cute little apron over her skirt. There's no one in there. What kind of food do they do? I don't know. I think we'll go to Skia, work our way up. First we'll do one of those restaurants where you don't have to talk, and after I feel comfortable with that, then we'll move up to a restaurant where you have to order food by talking. The thing is, I don't feel confident with my Japanese ordering. I feel confident having a conversation in Japanese, but Going to a restaurant is terrifying for me because I don't know how to say the names of the food. Sometimes the names of the food are in English and then you have to pronounce it in Japanese English. It's really frustrating. Most of the time I just point. I point at the menu. But then if you go to a place like McDonald's where they have the menu on the ceiling behind the cash register, Then you can't really point at it. It's difficult for them to understand. You have to read out what the menu says, what the item's called, and I, I find that to be really difficult. I think if we turn right and then turn left again, we can get to Skier. I feel kind of constipated though. I haven't had a shit today, and I feel like something's moving inside of me. People ask, how am I so skinny? It's because I don't have the confidence to go to restaurants and order food. If you're scared to order food, then you don't get any food. Don't horn at me, you bastard. Was he horning at me or this guy? Where'd that skier go? We need to turn left. I don't want to follow this weirdo. Look at his trousers. Look, can you see this, guys? You see a lot of trousers like that in Japan, really baggy. And the funny thing is, most of the construction workers who work on construction sites, they wear those kind of trousers. Isn't that really dangerous if you're working on a construction site with machinery and tools and you're wearing really baggy trousers? Isn't it easy for it to get snagged It's kind of stupid. They look really dumb as well. It looks like Aladdin. Doesn't make sense. Some things in Japan just don't make sense to me. If it was the UK and you were wearing really baggy trousers on a construction site, you would get done for health and safety in 5 seconds. They would send you home, make you wear proper trousers. Maybe it's like a fashion thing. Maybe it's like a traditional thing. Japanese people always seem to wear baggy clothing traditionally, like the kimonos. And the men's kimonos, a lot of baggy things. Why don't I go to a Japanese brothel? Because why pay for sex when I can get it for free? If you guys knew what I was up to, you would all be very shocked. There's a lot of things I can't talk about on this Japan trip because of restrictions. But if you guys are still around next year or whenever, then after it's all calmed down, then I can talk about it. I feel kind of frustrated about this Japan trip because I, I can't tell you guys everything that's happening. Or else it will fuck me over big time. But I have some— I have some good stories, and I've only been here for a week. I have some Class A stories, guys. Oh, you guys know nothing if you think you're shocked about what you've heard so far. I haven't told you everything because I don't want to go to prison. No, I didn't do anything illegal, and even if I did, I wouldn't admit to it on the video. Oh, look, the moon's out. The funny thing is, some of my stories sound so crazy that A lot of people think that I'm trolling or that I'm making it up, which is kind of a good thing, I guess. It's like I could walk into a police station and say, I just murdered my whole family. They might just laugh. Maybe I did. Oh, look at these cactuses! Or is it cacti? Okay, we have 27 people. I think that's a good number of people. Shall we go to dinner? Oh man, I'm so nervous. I'm shaking in my boots. I'm shaking. Starting to get a stitch from all the walking. Oh, where's that skier? I need to get back to the main road. Bum ba dum bum ba dum. Starting to get nice and dark. Hopefully Skia won't be crowded. If it's crowded, then we might have to wait until it gets a bit less crowded. Smells really good. I'm going to this restaurant called Skia. It's this restaurant where you don't have to talk to the waitresses when you order food. You just— there's this machine and you press some buttons and you pay money, and then it prints out a ticket. I think it was around here, left or right, I can't remember.

I found him.

I'm meeting up with my secret girlfriend here. We're gonna go for dinner. Okay, we're here. We can do it. We can do it. Is it even open? It says 24 hours open, so it should be. Oh look, they serve— they sell eel. ¥880. That's a lot of money. What's that down there?

It looks—

it's completely empty. There's no one in there. This makes it even more awkward, and I don't see any ticket machine. There's no ticket machine in there. Oh no, we have to change plans. I can't go in there if there's no ticket machine, and there's no customers in there. I can't go in there when there's no one in there. Shit, what should we do? Usually these places have a ticket machine where you order food. I can't see one. There's a menu on the wall. Maybe I should go back to Denny's. Should I go back to Denny's or should I go into here? At least Denny's had a few people.

I don't know.

I don't know how to order. Guys, help me. Hold my hand. I don't want to do it. I'd rather starve. Okay, let's go to Denny's. Fuck you. Ring your bell at me, stupid old woman! Who the hell she thinks she is? How many times she wants to ring her bell at me? I hate old women. Old women in Korea are the worst. They just push you out the way if you're in front of them. They want to get past.

They don't even say anything. They just.

Start poking you in the back with that elbow. It's so annoying. It's getting really windy. Hopefully there won't be a typhoon when I meet you tomorrow. Where was Denny's? Was it back here?

Am I going the right way?

Oh look, there's food here as well. I'm hungry. I thought Skier would have the ticket machine. Skier always has a ticket machine. Why doesn't it have a ticket machine? Why is life so difficult? How do I order food in England? My mum does it.

There's McDonald's.

Oh, look at this. That looks nice. I don't feel like eating McDonald's. I want to eat something I've never tried before. I want to see what's in that Denny's place.

Oh, my stomach's hurting.

You're scared of me? Why are you scared of me? I'm the nicest person in the world.

Bye-bye.

Denny's was over here. I found it, I found it. Okay, we need to check if we have money. Okay, we're gonna go in. We're just gonna walk in. Where's, where's my money?

I don't know.

Okay, there's Denny's. I'm trying to find my— here it is. ¥5,000. Oh, should we just walk straight in? We're here. It says it's open 24 hours. Okay, we're going in.

Do I need to make a reservation?

一人です。 We're in, we're in. How do I order? I don't actually know what she said. She said something about a drink bar. Please push to call for service. Okay, we're in a restaurant. I'm not by myself. I'm with forty people. This was the hardest part actually walking in. This food doesn't look great. It's just basically pasta. What should I get?

Is that it?

It's not much. Grand menu.

I don't know what to get. What do you want?

Look, they give you this burger with a packet of sauce.

Haha.

Did I press the button by accident? Oh shit, don't come on, I'm not ready. Is other drinks free? I'm not sure what she said. Oh, it's so expensive.

What about this? No, not this one. This one? 家 帰 る 前 に ここ に 寄 れて。 え？ 家 に 帰 っと った。 月 が な かった。 That waitress was kind of scary, wasn't she?

Now, if I get an egg, they'll ask me how I want it cooked. I don't know how to explain that. Why is life so difficult? Maybe I should just get some chips. Oh, I don't know what to get. Can someone buy me dinner? This is kind of expensive, you know. I don't really want a burger though. Why did I come here?

Post this.

Cut steak and beef hamburger. It's pretty pricey. They speak too fast. I can't catch what they're saying. Maybe I'll get this.

Let's see.

I can't leave now I've entered. That'll be even more awkward. Should I press it?

I think I'll get this.

I kind of want the egg, but there's too much sauce. I think I'll just get this. Um, okay, I'm gonna press. I'm pressing. Should I press it? Fuck, I pressed it. I need to get ready for pointing.

皆さん お 待 た せ しました。 これ 一 つ ください。 刻 み ました ミ ノ ロ シ ハ ンバ ー グ です。 はい。 セ ット は お 付 け します か？ あー つ け ない です。 か し こ ま りました。 以上 で よろ しい ですか？ 以上 です。 失 礼 いた します。 H oly fuck! Holy fuck! Holy fuck! Fuck.

I understood everything she said. I'm having a heart attack.

How do I get a drink?

Thanks for the $1, Andy.

Appreciate it.

The waitresses are so freaking cute here, but they're so robotic. It's like they're not human. The way they talk, they're like robots. I bet when they go home, they're completely different.

Yeah. Where's my food?

I think I keep touching the microphone like this. Should I get a drink first, or should I wait for the order to come first? Did I order the drink bar? I don't know. She said something about a drink bar, but I'm not sure what she said. How do I pay? Oh shit, it's coming. No, it's not me. No, before I ordered, when I walked in, she, she asked me if I wanted something and I said no thanks. I think she was asking me if I wanted to sit in the smoking section or the non-smoking section.

Do I have to pay for the drinks bar, or is it free?

It can't be free. Oh, should I order some alcohol? What do they have? Wine, French wine, red wine. I think she was just telling me where the drink bar was. She was saying the drink bar was over there. Oh shit, they're gonna sit next Please don't sit next to me. Please don't sit next to me. I don't want all-you-can-drink, I just want one drink. Hey, I could get sake or shochu or whiskey. Should I get some whiskey? Pure malt. They didn't sit next to me. I should have sat in the corner. Should I get some red wine like a gentleman? Jesus Christ, that's like $30 for the whole bottle. No thanks. If anyone wants me to get some wine, donate me $30 US dollars. I'll get this bottle of red wine. Do I have battery? 68% battery, we're fine. 400 yen for a beer. I can't drink the whole bottle of wine, I'm not crazy. Maybe I should get a beer. Should I press the button again? Should I press the button? Fuck, I hate this button. Okay, we'll get a beer.

Fuck. Holy fuck. She's really cute.

Okay, I got beer. We don't need this button anymore. Fuck off. I did film the waitress. I can't stick the camera— whoa, that's close. I can't stick the camera right in her face when she's in front of me. I got stood up. My date didn't show. I look like such a loser. I'm having dinner with 50 strangers from the internet. If all of you guys were here, could you fit?

One—

there's 3 tables here. Maybe 10 of you could sit next to me, and then maybe 6 of you could sit here. What about the other forty? You can all just sit on the floor in front of me.

Oh dear!

Oh shit, she's coming.

お待たせしました。生ビールでございます。いただきます。 I didn't see her coming.

This music, this music's so depressing.

以上 で ご 注 文 の 商 品 は それ ですか。 一 応 です。 はい、 ありがとうございます。 失 礼 します。 It 's not much, is it? Is this it?

Eight hundred yen. Better be good.

What's this green stuff?

It's wasabi. I just ate a big chunk of wasabi.

No thanks.

That's burnt my mouth.

It's not steak.

It's a hamburger. It's just like a hamburger. Just tastes like a normal beef burger. My girlfriend, she's not here. Calm down, Jesus Christ. My nose is running. You have to enjoy the food, not just shove it into your mouth.

I'm stuck. The food isn't great, to be honest.

It's pretty average. It just tastes like this is a beef burger. Nothing special. I already have a girlfriend. I don't need tons of girls. Girls love my hair.

V-neck.

Look at my double chin. My hair is fabulous. How dare you? You think my girlfriend's a virgin?

That's cute.

You think I'm a virgin? That's cute. You must be new to the channel if you think I'm a virgin.

Sitting next to me.

There's two really cute girls sitting right next to me. Oh fuck! Why is it so expensive? The burger was ¥900 and the beer was ¥400. Why are there 2 bills? I just paid ¥900 for a burger and 4 pieces of potato.

900?

McDonald's would have been so much cheaper. I could have got a Big Mac for ¥200. This is only— this was ¥900 for one piece of burger. Someone send me some Super Chats.

Super chats.

What should I do now? Should I just go? Where's my money? The things I do for a livestream! All I got was $1! You guys are so stingy!

Let's go!

I feel kind of trapped now. How do I pay? Okay, let's go.

Let's go. Let's go.

I feel drunk. It's the girls, they were sitting next to me.

Mission accomplished.

Ah, I feel like I conquered— I conquered a fear today.

Oh.

We're gonna go to the park now. Walk around in the dark.

Shh.

Hahaha. Ah, that was interesting. Never done that before. Were those girls cute next to me? They seemed kind of cute, but I didn't get a good look at their face. They had that cute shape, nice long black hair, slim figures. I didn't see their faces though. From behind, all Japanese women look cute, but it's when you see their faces. Let's walk around the park for a bit. I feel kind of intoxicated. It was a lot of beer, guys. Anyone could get drunk on that amount. Should we go back to the guest house, see if the Canadian guy's there? And then he'll say, hey Daniel, what are you doing? And I'll say, I'm live streaming. And then he'll say, how many people are watching? And I'll say, 1,700. And he'll be like, whoa!

Whoa!

My hair looks so horrible today. The wind just messed it up. The Canadian guy is really nice. He's friendly. He talks. to people. He doesn't sit there on his phone like a loser.

So expensive.

¥1,400 for one burger and one beer. You can get that for ¥300 at the convenience store. It's just one burger, 4 pieces of potato, and some spinach. It's not exactly amazing, is it? Hey, look, there's a botanical garden here. Should we go down this way? It's completely pitch black though. Everyone's running.

What is it?

They're all running from something. Oh, I came here before with the Korean girl. The Korean girl that I confessed my love to. I said to her— we were holding hands, we were walking around this park, and I said, I like you. And then she just started laughing, and then She said she wasn't interested. What the hell? We're walking around in the park holding hands together and she said she's not interested in me. Why are you holding my hand then? The Korean girl is so frustrating because I got really close to having sex with her, but she didn't have sex with me. Even though we kissed and we, and we held hands, we didn't actually Usually end up sleeping together. I've never kissed a girl and then not had sex with her. That was the first time. Go to karaoke? No, karaoke is going to be in the next video. I need to pace myself. If I do everything in one stream, then we're going to have nothing else to do for the next one. So, maybe for the next stream we'll do a new challenge. Go to karaoke. Going to karaoke by myself is something I've done before, so it's not difficult. I've done it maybe 3 times. I went to karaoke by myself. It's not as awkward. But you're going to be able to listen to me sing My Chemical Romance, so that might be kind of awkward. Overcoming social anxiety on YouTube. A maid cafe? I don't know about a maid cafe. That's kind of weird. My favorite MCR album is— I quite like Black Parade. Conventional Weapons is also pretty good, has some good ones. And, um, the second one. Pretty much all of them.

I don't know.

The first MCR album I listened to was The second one? Which one's that one? 3 Cheers for Sweet Revenge. I think the first one is I Brought You My Bullets. I've never seen them live. Let's go home. What time is it? It's 6:48 PM. Still kind of early. Oh look, it's a cat!

There's a cat.

Meow meow. Japanese cats have really short tails. Meow meow.

It's coming, it's coming.

Oh, oh, look, it's licking the black one. It's so cute. Look, it's licking his— her boyfriend or whatever.

I'm gonna sneak up.

Aww, they're so cute. The black one looks like mine. The black one looks like Toffee. I have 2 cats at home, a black one called Toffee and a brownish one called Mimo. And the black one, we had to amputate his back leg because he had a tumor, and then he got run over and his stomach got twisted, so we had to send him to the vets again to get operated. And now he's about 18 to 19 years old and he's kind of losing it. He keeps urinating on the floor, he keeps shitting himself, and he's not cleaning himself properly, so he attracts all these flies. And the flies are starting to lay eggs around his butthole. And my dad looked it up on Google and he said that there's this thing called fly strike where flies lay their eggs around an animal's butthole, and then the maggots crawl up the butthole and start eating it, eating its flesh. So my dad has to clean Toffee every night, give him a bath, otherwise he just starts attracting flies. So I'm kind of worried that when I get back home, he's gonna be dead. He used to sit on my lap every night.

Toffee.

I wanna try touch it. Let me touch you. He doesn't care. He doesn't want to be touched.

Let me get closer.

Can I touch you? Can I touch you? He's letting me touch him. He doesn't seem to like it. He thinks it's food.

Hahaha.

I don't have any food. Do you want to come home with me? He looks like my cat. I guess all black cats look the same though.

I'm coming closer.

This is the only pussy I'm getting until Saturday. Where's the other cat? It's over here. It's digging. Did you just do a shit? I think it just did a shit. Meow, meow, meow. Meow, meow. Oh, there's another one over there. Can you see it? Look, that's a creepy looking one. Okay, let's go. Cats are so cute.

Meow, meow.

Oh, I don't want to leave them.

Let's go.

No, I'm not cutting my hair. My hair's amazing. Look, so pretty. I look stupid with short hair. Just look at my videos from last year when I was in Taiwan. I look like an idiot.

Ugh.

I don't like this bit. It keeps going like this, like, woo! Why can't it just go down straight? I would kill to have straight hair. There's something moving. Is that a cat? Looks like a cat. Oh, there's loads of cats here. Look, can I turn the flash on? Let's see. Oh, it says flashlight unavailable whilst camera is being used. Can you see the cats? There's 2. I can see 2. No, it's 3. It's 3 cats over there just chilling out. I'm looking for some pussy tonight.

What's over here?

Oh, Skier's over there. Should we go for Skier? Second round. It's another cat, look! It's a white one. She's looking. She's checking me out. How do I get home? I'm trying to get out of this park, but it just goes round and round in circles. If I can get to the main entrance, then I know which way to go. Oh, Lawson's over there. I look kind of stupid. Okay, we're gonna go home, sit in the living room for a bit. I don't like running because it messes up my hair.

You're right.

How did you know? It's already messed up though. The wind messed it all up.

All up. Hey.

How do I get home? What do I like about Tomo-chan? Well, she's seen all of my videos and she still likes me. That's her best feature. Oh, there's a cat!

Oh, there's a cat, guys!

Guys, there's a cat! Why is he resting his head on the pavement like that? Meow meow. He's so cute. I want to have sex with it. It looks kind of pissed off. Look at his tail. Why are there so many cats here? Are they stray cats? Meow, meow, meow. I want to take you back to my room. I have a big tub of Vaseline just waiting for you. Oh, oh, oh, oh, it's getting more pissed off.

I want to touch it. Haha.

He's eating the stick! No, don't eat the stick. It looks really pissed off. He looks so pissed off. He's trying to attack me. It's got a nice tail, nice bushy tail. I don't want to touch this cat, it's going to scratch me. Look, look, look, look at it. Oh, he's gonna attack my hand.

Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.

It's so pretty. Someone take a screenshot. I want to take a picture. I can't take a picture and stream at the same time. Okay, I'm gonna screenshot it later. Screenshot. Look at the camera.

Meow meow.

Okay, that's a good screenshot. Someone screenshot it and send it to me. This is a good shot.

All right.

That's a good one. Oh, it's a mosquito.

Let's go.

Bye-bye. Put that on Instagram. Okay, I think— oh, it's this way. This is the way. We go forwards, then we turn left. And go down the main road. Easy peasy.

Pond.

There's a pond here as well. Maybe we'll come back next time. It's too dark now, can't see anything.

Whoo!

No one whistles in Japan. I just noticed you will not find a single person whistling in Japan unless he's a foreigner. In England, everyone whistles all the time. A customer comes into the store, he'll start whistling. When I used to whistle in Korea, my girlfriend used to tell me to stop whistling. She said that it's bad manners. And then when I was in Taiwan, my Taiwanese friend, she said if you whistle in Taiwan, it brings out the ghosts, so it's not good to whistle. Ghosts. She's a 26-year-old 26-year-old grown woman and she believes in freaking ghosts. How sad is that? I'm whistling in your country and there's nothing you can do about it. Come on, ghosts don't exist. There's no such thing as ghosts. My Taiwanese friend, she used to say she could see ghosts. She said she could actually see them, especially in October when it was ghost month in Taiwan.

What a load of rubbish.

She said she couldn't leave her room at night because the ghosts will see her, and then they started burning all of this stuff in the barrels. Yeah, they do that. Outside their house. Taiwanese are superstitious as hell. They're really superstitious. They take all this ghost stuff really seriously. There's all these rules, things that you can't do during Ghost Month. Like, you can't go on holiday, you're not supposed to move out, you're not supposed to change jobs, you're not supposed to walk outside after midnight. Load of rubbish. I've never seen a ghost in my life. I've been alive for 28 years. The people who claim they see ghosts are just the same as people who claim that Jesus talks to them. Either they're lying or they're completely crazy, or they've had some kind of experience that's led them to believe that they exist. Some, some strange It's so noisy here. I don't believe in anything. I don't believe in religion, don't believe in gods. I don't believe in spirits or ghosts or afterlife. Life isn't as interesting as that. You just die and then you stop living. That's it. There's no hokey-pokey magic men. There's no special land you go to after you die. All of this is just rubbish that humans made up because they didn't know better. There's no greater good, there's no karma. It's all rubbish. All of it. If believing that stuff makes you feel happier, then that's great. But I'm pretty sure— I'm 100% sure none of it actually exists. Can I cross the road? The only thing I believe in is we're all going to be dead. We're all going to be dead in 50 years' time, so you might as well have some fun whilst you are alive, because we're only going to be alive once and then it's going to be over.

So...

You don't want to waste it. Eat food, have sex, have fun, and then you can die. That's how I think. How did the universe start? Um, I don't know, the Big Bang Theory. Explosions in space. Who cares? Does it really matter how it started? The important thing is that it did start. Even if we understand how it started, it doesn't really change anything.

What do you think?

Do I read manga? No, I don't read anything. That smells really good. What's that smell? There's so many izakayas here.

Who's laughing?

I don't watch anime. I don't read manga. Hey, look, it's karaoke! Look, karaoke. There's some drunk people behind me. Let's walk faster. That's what Japanese sounds like. I cut my pubes. I'm not gonna meet Tomoko when I have a full jungle down there. I used my scissors that I use for eating pot noodle, and I cut them all off nice and short. I didn't shave it.

Why do you use scissors?

I use scissors because I have a lot of pubic hair and I have a lot of hair around my anus which I had to cut off as well. And there was some around my ballsack which had to plim— plim? Trim?

Clip? Clip.

You asked me. If you ask me a question, I'm gonna answer it. I didn't just start talking about my balls randomly. feel kind of hungry. I don't feel full. I don't feel satisfied.

What a con.

Waste of money. ¥900 for one burger. Not going to Denny's again. Denny's, I give Denny's 4 out of 10. Too expensive, pretty average food, nothing special. I'd rather just go to Lawson or Family Mart. Oh, didn't see all that rubbish. Would you get gangbanged for 10 grand?

10 million.

Yeah, of course. I'd get gangbanged for 1 million. I have a question for you. Would you rather have one really good relationship in your whole life, or would you have— or would you rather have multiple failed relationships with several women, just short-term relationships. So you could have either one really nice girlfriend for your whole life, or you could have 20 really shit girlfriends that only last a few months, every relationship. Would you rather have one really— No, Would you rather have one really attractive girl to have sex with, or would you rather have 20 not really attractive girls but they're doable? I personally would rather have the 20 girls. I'm a quantity over quality type of person. It gets boring having sex with the same person over and over again. You need variety. I need to piss. Really bad, me. The French guy was outside my room today. I was in my room and I could hear someone speaking French outside of my room and I could hear his footsteps. He's really creepy. He doesn't talk to anyone. He just— he's on his phone all of the time mumbling to himself in French. French sounds really weird. That's all I can hear. The French guy is really ugly. He's like this— he looks like Hodor from Game of Thrones. He's really tall and really fat and he has this exact same face the whole time. Like, he looks really miserable all of the time. I don't know if I should feel sorry for him. He's— he looks like he has some kind of mental illness. He doesn't seem right in the head. He creeps me out. There was another person like him last time, this German guy. He never talked to anyone. He always looked really angry and upset, and he was always by himself. It's weird. At least I talked to some people. I talked to the Canadian guy. Maybe they have Social anxiety that's worse than me. Whoa, we're gonna get run over. Let's go this way. the toilet. It's really badly— is the supermarket open?

Yeah.

Okay, let's switch cameras. Do I have a big dick? It's 6 inches. 6 inches, guys. I think that's big enough. It's big enough for Asian pussy. I need to pee really badly. Where's the toilet? Oh look, there's a matsuya here. I really want to get a second meal though. If they have a ticket machine, I'm going straight in. Matsuyas are pretty good as well. Is that a ticket machine? Do they have a ticket machine here? I've only got 27% battery. They don't have a ticket machine. Oh, is that a ticket machine? Oh, what's that in the corner? I can't see it. If I stand here, I can see it. There's a ticket machine! Should I get something to eat? 500 yen.

I don't know.

500 yen? I don't really feel that hungry. I feel like I've done enough today. We should have came here earlier. And I really need to pee, so let's keep moving. The girls that I slept with, they've always said that my penis is pretty big, but my testicles are kind of small. They say that my testicles are kind of small in comparison to the Asian guys that they've slept with, but they always say my cock's pretty big. I already ate at the restaurant, BRGR Queen. We were in the restaurant for almost 40 minutes. How did you miss it? Do I speak Japanese? Yeah, I do. I would happily show you guys my penis, but my girlfriend wouldn't be happy about it. I'm not shy about people seeing my penis. I think it's a nice-looking penis. Josh Black is a scammer? Why, what did he do? No, Tomoko said that she wouldn't be happy if I showed people my penis, especially if I showed girls. She wouldn't be a happy bunny.

26% battery.

Come on, give me a convenience store. I need somewhere to piss. Who's Josh Black? Do I like football? I can't stand football or sports. It's so boring. We're nearly at 5,000 subscribers. We're going to do a special live stream. It's going to be me doing exactly what I'm doing now, but it's going to be Special. Hey, look, it's ramen. Why are there no convenience stores here? Ramen. I need to pee. I need to pee. I like badminton. It's quite fun. I play with my sister sometimes in our garden. I'm pretty good at badminton. We're meeting soon. We're meeting on Friday. She's already bought her bus ticket. I need to book the hotel or find a hotel. We might be going to a love hotel, not a usual hotel. It's really uncomfortable to walk. There's nowhere to piss. I don't know if I'm going the right way back to my home. This looks like the wrong way. I don't recognize this place.

These kids.

Ba ba ba ba. I like doing the live streams more than the 10-minute videos. It's kind of irritating having to edit the video, and then if I talk about sexual things, I hardly get any ad revenue. I only make about $3 to $5 per video anyway. So if I do a livestream and someone— if I get at least $5— no, if I get at least $4 in Super Chat, then it means that it was worth my time more than a 10-minute video. But that's not guaranteed because people aren't going to donate every time. I'll do a normal 10-minute video if I have something to talk about, but if I don't really have anything to talk about, then I'll just do a livestream and talk about random things. Livestream is just like something I can do to talk about things randomly when there's nothing really to talk about. No one— yeah, one person donated today, Andy. He donated $1. You know that video that got 7,000 views, the one about the scam Amway? That only got about $2 even though it has 7,000 views. I'm not sure why, but it got restricted for ad revenue. I need to check I'm gonna look at my maps. I think I'm, I'm lost. Hold on a second, I'm gonna check maps. I'm back, I'm back, guys! Don't go, don't leave me! I was going the wrong way. If I kept going that way, it would have, it would have led me to the completely wrong I need to go here, then turn right.

Whoa.

The guest house is somewhere in that direction. Come on, I need to piss. Shout out your channel. What kind of videos do you make? How to talk to girls for anxious people. I already kind of explained it in my last video.

I—

you have to make a trap. There's 2 types of spiders, right? There's a hunting spider, and then there's the type of spider that sits It's in its web waiting for prey. If you don't have the confidence to be a hunting spider, then you have to be a trap spider. And then you have to make your spider web. The spider web can be several things. It can be sitting in a guest house. It can be making an online dating website— not website, profile. It can be making a HelloTalk profile. It can be making a YouTube channel. Those are the traps I used. And then you kind of have to combine the traps. So if you have a YouTube channel, you share that onto stuff like HelloTalk. Guys, do you mind if I take a piss in this park?

No.

I really need a toilet. There's no convenience stores anywhere. If you don't have the confidence to approach girls, then you have to, you have to try and get them to approach you. All of them, all of my past girlfriends, including my current one, have approached me first. All of them. I have never had a girlfriend where I've approached them. I've had a girlfriend where I approached her first. I've never gone up to them and made the move. It's always been them approaching me. If I can find somewhere quiet and secluded, I'll take a leak in the bush, but I don't feel— I don't feel comfortable, but I really need to pee. I really shouldn't have had that beer. But there's no one here, is there? There's no one behind me. I can do it right here. The thing is, I don't want to have to stop peeing midstream. Fuck, I really need to piss. Is that a park in front of me? Okay, we're gonna start walking faster. But walking faster makes me want to pee even Shit, there's people here.

Fuck.

I need to go that way, but there's people there. Should I just take a piss here? I could take a piss here. It's pretty dark, but if those— oh, those kids are behind me. No, this is the wrong way. See, I can't take a piss here. That person just came. Why are there kids riding their bloody bicycles? If it weren't for those damn kids behind me, I could take a piss right here. Oh, please, please just give me a Lawson, a Family Mart, anything. There's nowhere to piss. I can't piss here. Why is my bladder so small? I had one glass of beer, that was it. You're not supposed to drink and drive. There's nowhere to piss.

Fuck, fuck.

Come on, come on, come on, walk faster, walk faster. I might need to check my map again. Where are we? Is this that bridge again? It's the bridge, the river. Where's the guest house? Oh, I think I know where I am. This is where I was making that video last time. Oh, there's toilets over there. Are those toilets over there? Oh, please, please, I need to get over this fence. There's toilets in this park. I love you. I love you, God. There is a God. There is a God. The God of toilets. Oh, thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you so much.

Oh my God.

It's one of those Japanese ones. Guys, do you mind if I take a piss? Do you want me to mute it? I think I should mute it, otherwise you're gonna hear the splashing. Be right back.

I'm gonna go and get some water. There's someone out there.

Shh.

That was good.

Oh, so good. I pissed so much. I pretty much pissed out all of that beer that I just drank. Ah, so satisfying. That was good. That was good luck. I did wash my hands. I only touched my penis. It's not dirty. I didn't piss on my hands. Why do I need to wash my hands in the first place? It's not like I urinated on my hand. Why do I need To wash them. I just touched the skin of my penis, which is perfectly clean. I had a shower. My foreskin's not dirty. Trust me. Which way are we going? Japanese girls are hot in bed. They start moaning, kind of like in porn. Not all of them make those noises like in the porn. Some of them make normal noises. I've had maybe one or two that that made those screeching noises, which I didn't really mind that much. When you start doing it, you kind of phase it— you phase it out. You kind of just ignore it. I need to find out where my guest house is. I'm lost again. We've only got 16% battery. I wish I had a girlfriend who had long hair. All of my girlfriends have had short hair or slightly above shoulder-length hair. I've never had a girlfriend who's had really long hair apart from the French girl. For some reason, the type of girls that are attracted to me are the girls that like having short hair. Oh, my first Japanese girlfriend, she had long hair, but she was kind of ugly, so it's a bit of a waste, isn't it?

I'm tired.

Not sure what to do. This is pretty much what I do all day. Walk around a bit, get hungry, get something to eat, go back to the guesthouse, sit in the living room for a few hours to see if anyone wants to talk to me, which they usually don't unless it's the Canadian guy. Then watch some YouTube in my room, jerk off, then go to sleep. That's my Japan life. Pretty dull. It's 7:45 PM. No, they don't talk to me because I don't— no, I don't talk to them because they don't talk to me. That's why I don't talk to them. Why should I talk to them when they don't talk to me? I'm a guest here. I'm new. They should make the effort to talk to me, not the other way around. I have no idea where I am. None of them show any interest in who I am, what I'm doing. I could be a millionaire. And they wouldn't even know. Oh, I know this place. There's a police station here. Then we need to turn right. I don't know who Cassidy Banks is. Who is it? Yeah, I know she's worried about meeting me. She thinks I'm not gonna like her when I meet her. Which is kind of stupid. Why would I not like her? Why would I come all the way to Japan if I didn't like her? Besides, even if I didn't like her, it's not like that's gonna stop me. Even if she had 4 nipples, I would still have sex with her. Where the fuck is the guest house?

Ah, look there!

I'm tired. I came this way last time. Oh, that's the supermarket, isn't it? I think it's around here. 10% battery. How am I supposed to livestream and ride a bicycle at the same time? Stupid bicycles, so irritating. They're gonna go left, then they're gonna go right, and then they're gonna go left. Ugh, which way are you gonna go? Make up your bloody mind. Um, this is the wrong way. I need to get over this fence. Why are there these stupid fences next to the footpaths? How long have I been living in Japan? 2 weeks. It's my second week. Things are going pretty well. Here we are. We just need to turn left and then we're home. Um, I think I'm gonna go into the supermarket. I'm still hungry. I need to change battery though. Guys, if I change battery, can you wait? It'll take about 2 minutes, 2 minutes tops, and then we'll go into the guest house. We'll sit there like a loser eating food. See if anyone comes and talks to us. Hold on, I need to find my battery. This is half price. Look, half price, ¥150. Such a good deal. If you come to the supermarket in the evening, you always get discounts. What should I drink? Don't feel like drinking alcohol again. I've got a bit of a headache. Where are the drinks? It's fried chicken with egg and rice. Canada Dry. Maybe let's get some orange juice. What's this? Yuzu and lemon. 10% fruit juice. 2.99. Thanks, you made the whole stream worth doing. Is it 2.99? It's half price, so it's actually 1.49.

Thanks.

You made my day— you made— you made my day. Is that the phrase? You made my day worth living? It's a bit too much. Okay, we need to find a drink. The name of the supermarket, I'm not sure. Something like Kinsho, Kinsho. I don't think YouTube takes half of it. I don't think, I don't think that's true. They might take some of it, not half. We can get some cow piss— cow piss soda. Okay, let's go. Did I bow?

No.

A cash surgeon. Okay, let's go back to the guest house. This house of loneliness. Home sweet home. I don't know how many times I've masturbated in my room. I've been here, uh, how many days? 12 days? So that's at least twice a day. Sometimes I do it 3 times a day, so 30 times. I'd guess 30 times.

You're a sicko.

My room smells like cum. Not gonna lie.

それ も ある。 寝 る か あ なる で でも 十 時 ぐ らい どう せ 料 理 も 来 て る の か 結 局 暇 や な つ って また 集 ま って また 世界 人 会 話 世界 で 覚 え た 俺 以 外 五 時 三 十 分 ぐ らい。 Why?

I will not take the sister, you know. No, it's super awkward. How are you? So nice when you were eating with me.

Thanks, Izzy. I can't talk to these people. I'm gonna change, change Wi-Fi. レ イ ナ さん、 B が 一 人 発 生 した ということで ござ いました。 一 人 って 結 構、 そ こ は 発 散 という か、 割 と お す す め の ところ じゃない ですか。 だ から あれ、 もの すごい 本当 に ユ ー ズ の 音 が 湧 いて く る じゃない ですか。 い く ら でも 使 える の かな と は、 もう め っちゃ や っぱ り 出 て る と思 う。 ま あ そう いうこと で 不 正 解 なん でしょう。 正 解 は え、 社 員 お 前 の 水 で つ けて お か ない と。 神 社 の 中 では さ せて いただ く という 気 持 ち が 大 事 です。 この や り 方 を。 す べ て 決 ま って いる という 話 を しました けれ ども、 神 社 の まあ 神 社 の 三 方 を 見て いただ く と だ いた い す べ て 左 に 左 という な って いる もの が あります。 これは 先 ほど 言 った ように 左 が 上、 右 が 下 考 え 方 が あります。 お 花 は あれ は な かな か 神 社 を 見て 左 と 右 Yeah, we have a lot to make because Christian Muslims Buddhist even some some of those worship Japanese God.

If somebody create their own religion, they don't they don't care about others near me.

Yeah.

and they are closed. So you approach the toilet, you see the door, yeah, yeah, I was scared the door's not open.

I think, wow, this toilet knows what it's doing. ですね。 ここ は だから お 寺 さん じゃ なく て 神 社 じゃ なく て 修 行 ということ よ り か は や っぱ り こう お願い 事 だ と思 うん です よ。 今回 の 対 して や る のは なんか ちょっと なんか いい な 感じ が します。 直接 何 か なんか そう する と 何 か あの。 入 れた 方 が なんか 成 功 率 高 い から ね。 僕 は 非常 に 数 学 的 に 考 え ました。 つ まり あの B だ と 初 回 に ダ メ なん じゃない ですか。 ということ は 一 回 目 が ダ メ って こと は 二 回 目 も ダ メ って こと。 僕 は 数 学 的 方 法 で 考 える んで、 も っと 変 化。 正 解 は。 前 回 は ない です けど も、 昨 日 から 皆さん は ご 用 意 いただ いて いた は ず です。 その お 礼 ということで お 借 り する のは こちら です。 ここ で 返 す から 質 問。 入 院 して も ら った お 前 に 言 って も いい の？ あ、 借 り 金 だ った ん ですね。 そ っと 持 ち 物 時 は 持 ち 物 を 言 う って いうこと。 そ の お 隣 の 通 り 来 て た んです けれ ども、 ちょっと 絶 死 という もの を まあ 毛 穴 という ふ う に 考 える 考 え 方 が あり ま して、 その 毛 穴 を と お 父 さん に 近 づ ける のは よろしく ない ということで、 その お 隣 を 鍛 え た 方 が いい という 考 え 方 も あります。 ただ この 毛 穴 という 考 え 方 なんです けど も、 最近 では ですね、 毛 が 気 持 ち の 木 が 枯 れる つ まり 気 持 ち が こう 落 ち 込 んで しま う よう な 状 態 で そう いう その 元 気 の ない 状 態 を 患 者 さん に 近 づ けて はい け ない 影 響 を 与 えて はい け ない という 考 え 方 から その 亡 く な った 存 在 に 触 れた 直 後 は お 参 り を し ない 方 が よろ しい という ふ う に 言 わ れ ます ということで ご 参 加 に 関 して は 失 礼 いた しました。 次 は 整 理 テ ラ ピ ー です。 ね え、 こう いう。 他 に いた こと ない。 今 大 阪 は そんな に いた こと ない し、 あ、 そう なんです。 他 の ところ は ど こ から 来 た の？ まあ 東 京。 東 京 は すご く 寒 い。 まあ なんか レ ー ガ ー に 行 か ない。 え？ 東 京 は すご く 寒 い。 まあ だ し 寒 く ない から。 寒さは東京の怖い。 で 合 わ せ 方 に も 決 まり は ある ん ですね。 あの 少 し ず ら して 拍 手 を する と、 まず 一 関 節 なんです けど、 あの ず ら して そして あの 拍 手 を ここ だけ なんか 音 が し よう と して で。 会 社 の 言 葉 かな。 そうですね。 あの 会 社 の 言 葉 という のは、 お願い で 桜 って お 伝 え する と よろ しい と思います けれ ども、 あと は ですね、 あの 神 奈 川 という の も まあ レ ベ ル の こう 例えば 人 間 同 士 の レ ベ ル の 関 係 だ という ふ う に 考 え れ ば、 自 分 の 名 前 で あの よろ しい ん じゃない か と思います。 ああ。 A が 三 方 で B 一 人 が 一 人 ですね。 どう して いい でしょう か。 正 解 は A の 中 長 です。 はい、 お そ ら く 正 解 です。 住 所 と 言 って も あの 何 県 何 々 市 何 番 地 何 々 という か 細 か い 住 所 という よ り は 自 分 が ど この 誰 で な の か という の を 少 なく と も 神 様 に お 伝 え する の が でき る では ない か ということで まあ ど っち を お 伝 え す れ ば 自 分 が 何 者 か が わか り や す い か と い えば それは 住 所 で あり ましょう という 部分 で 今 大 変 お 住 所 ください。 人 は 普 段 まあ ど ちら の 神 社 も つ まり 神 様 が 守 って いる エ リ ア に 住 んで いる の か ということ を お 知 ら せ する の が 正 しい ん じゃない か と思います。 はい。 と も と は そう いう 自 分 が 住 んで いる エ リ ア の 神 社 に 行 く か や っぱ り 行 かな き ゃ い け ない ですか。 確 か に 外 出 の 人 も 気 にな ります よね。 普 段 から 地 元 の 神 社 に 行 く べ き なん でしょう か。 そう ですね。 あの これは お 時間 の 様 という ふ う に 言 います けれ ども、 地 元 の エ リ ア これは 非常 に 大 切 です。 あの 神 様 は 常 に 守 って く だ さ って いる という 話 を しました けれ ども、 あの 神 様 は 守 って く だ さ って いる エ リ ア が ある と 考 え ら れ ます。 まあ 全 国 に 神 社 約 まあ 10 万 社 ぐ らい ある という ふ う に 言 わ れて ま して、 まあ こんな に 小 さい 皆 様 に も その 途 中 も 持 って いただ か れて いる 神 様 い ら っ しゃ います から、 こちら も 自 分 の 愛 人 では ない です けれ ども、 自 分 の 神 様 と して お 守 り にな って ください。 で、 お 寺 の 方 では ですね、 ちょっと 説 明 して いき たい と思います。 I'm back! I'm back!

There was a white guy with really long hair cuddling a Japanese girl. Did you see it, guys? Did you see it? Ah, back on the roof. Guys, did you see those 2 people? They're always just sitting there cuddling like a bunch of weirdos. There was this guy— Yeah, I lost connection to the Wi-Fi. My pocket Wi-Fi disappeared for some reason. When I go back down, I'll try and show you, but there's, there's this white guy just sitting there on the sofa with this Asian girl. They're just cuddling. It's really weird. So here I am on the rooftop where I made that last depressing video. So currently in the living room there is the Italian guy and the Spanish guy, and for some reason they talk to each other in Japanese. I thought Italian and Spanish were pretty much the same language. I guess not. They sound the same. It's so boring here. The Italian guy—he sounds like—I don't know—he sounds like a robot when he talks. Hello, ba ba ba ba ba ba. And I've never heard the Spanish guy talk English before. I've only heard him speak in Spanish or in Japanese. Maybe he doesn't know how to speak English. So I'm currently on the rooftop where I made out with the Korean girl 7 years ago. It was right here. Right there. We were pressed up against this fence and we were looking at the moon, which was over there. And then I started kissing her. This is what the view looks like. I'm pretty sure he's Spanish. I, I heard him speak Spanish. Maybe he was from South America, one of the Spanish colonies, remnants of the Spanish Empire. He was talking about paying for sex with the Italian guy last time. It was kind of funny. Why doesn't he just get a girlfriend? He's not bad-looking. He seems confident, outgoing. Why does he need to pay for sex? I don't have to pay for sex. The Italian guy seems to know a lot about paying for sex in Japan. It's half past 8 in the evening. There were no people in the living room. There were 2 people down there. This place is completely dead. What day is it?

It's Tuesday.

How come there's no people there? There should at least be 5 or 6 people eating dinner. Busy doing what? You should have seen this place 7 years ago. It was like a party every night. It was so much fun. There were the Canadian guys, the American guy, the Korean girls. Now all I have is a bloody Italian guy and a Spanish guy. Maybe it's the time of year. 7 years ago I came in February and now it's October. Maybe there's no tourists in October. Maybe they will come in spring. Oh, look, a spammer. I think you have to be pretty naive if you're scared of North Korea. They've been doing the same stuff for decades. Nothing's gonna happen. Even the Japanese people don't care about North Korea anymore because they're not going to do anything. They do this all the time. I'm going to be here until December. Those two people, they don't even talk. They're just sitting there cuddling. So boring. This building has 4 floors. There's at least 100 people staying here, and it's like it's dead. There's no one here. Why do I have to be here? I'm meeting a girl. I'm meeting a girl. I'm vlogging my experiences. That's pretty much it. 7 years is a long time, isn't it? A lot of things change. Apart from me. Not much has changed for me in the last 7 years. I've had several relationships, that's about it. And I started a YouTube channel. It definitely felt more exciting 7 years ago when I first came here. Everything was new. I didn't know how to do anything. She might be dead. She might have gotten married. She might have had a baby. Look at this place. Thousands of people are living here and it's so quiet. That's so strange. Look at all these buildings. I really want to play Vainwood. Glory, but I'm still connected to the European server, so it lags so much, and I'm not sure how to connect to the Japanese server. I've got no games to play. I was hoping I could play Vainglory, but every time, every time I try playing it, it starts lagging because it's connecting to the European server. I think I would have to change my App Store location to Japan and then download the Japanese version of it, but I'm too lazy. Oh look, it's the moon. What did I do in Norway? I had sex with my Korean girlfriend. And we walked around. My girlfriend lives far away. With her parents. We're meeting in a few days. Just for the day though. She has to go back home in the evening. Yeah, I went to Denny's. I went to Denny's and I ordered a burger. It cost ¥900. They just gave me one burger, a few pieces of potato, some spinach, and I had a beer.

So expensive.

Why don't I get a Chinese girlfriend? Because I already have a girlfriend. I'm not interested in Chinese people. And then these really cute girls sat next to me in the restaurant in Denny's. They could have sat anywhere in the restaurant, it was pretty much empty, but they had to sit right next to me.

Why?

Interested in a side bitch? I already have 2. I'm okay. I would hate to go to China though. The only reason I'm interested in Japanese girls is because Japan is the only country that I'd be interested in going to. If I had a Mexican girlfriend, then I'd have to go to Mexico. Ugh, no thanks. I'd rather just masturbate. If I got a Thai girlfriend, I'd have to go to Thailand. Ugh, no thanks. If I had a British girlfriend, then I'd be stuck in Britain. She might live in, like, a poor council estate with some irritating relatives. She might have a chavvy brother who has tattoos and gets drunk I don't want a British girlfriend. There's no attraction there. Lots of Mexicans have Asian eyes. Yeah, but lots of Mexicans live in Mexico. I wouldn't want to go to Mexico even if you paid me to. I like having both of my kidneys. My perfect girlfriend would be— she would be independent, she wouldn't be tied down, she wouldn't have commitments, she wouldn't have to ask for permission if she wanted to meet up with me. She would have Her own career, maybe something online, like an online store, or maybe even a YouTube channel, or freelance something, so we could go on vacation, we can go traveling anywhere, anytime we wanted to without being restricted by jobs or responsibilities. She would enjoy sex. She would like having sex a lot, but not too much. She wouldn't keep intro— she wouldn't keep trying to introduce me to her irritating friends or her family. She wouldn't have any brothers. Hopefully her parents would be dead so I don't have to meet them. And she would be— she wouldn't be a Ned Stark. She wouldn't be an honorable person. She would be like me, a Littlefinger.

Haha.

I don't like Ned Starks. Yeah, it's nice, all honorable and stuff, but they don't get past season 1, do they? Look at Ned Stark, he died. He didn't even get past season 1. But Littlefinger, he, he managed to survive all the way until seven— seven season— season 7 before he died. Also, she has to be tech savvy. People who know nothing about technology or internet or social media stuff kind of irritate me. It would be great to be in a relationship with someone who is into YouTube. We can talk about our favorite YouTubers and stuff like that. Would I like to stay in Japan for the rest of my life? I don't know. It's kind of boring. But then it's, it's not any more boring than being in England is. At least when I'm in Japan I get to have sex. In England I don't get any sex. But I get to see my parents and my family, so I guess it's like a trade-off. Great, now I can't talk because there's someone behind me.

Someone behind me smoking.

No, it's not the French guy. If it was the French guy, I could hear him speaking French already. Did I go to university? No.

Nope.

The smoking guy left. I think I creeped him out. Idiot. Stupid bunch of antisocial twats in this waste-of-time guesthouse. I don't fit into any society, to be honest. It's not a problem with culture or which country I'm in. I just don't fit in with other people, mostly because Because I think other people are stupid most of the time. I used to watch Friends a lot, that sitcom, when I was a kid, and I always used to think that when I grew up, my life would be like Friends. I would have a tight-knit group of close friends and we would always be together and we would always hang out in the same place. But life isn't really like that, is it? I like being with people, but it has to be the right kind of person.

person.

I'd rather be alone than be stuck with a bunch of irritating, boring people. What do you mean none of them worked? They all worked in Friends. Ross was a professor at university. Rachel was a waitress, and then she did something in a company, sales or something. Phoebe was like a Like a beggar, basically. No, she was a massage person, a masseuse. Joey was an actor. What was Chandler? Something about advertising. Monica was— wasn't she a chef? I used to love that show. Me and my family, we used to watch it every day. We would always watch the same shows on TV. 6 PM, The Simpsons. And then we would— was it Simpsons? I think it was 5:30 PM, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. And then after that, it was The Simpsons. And then around 8 o'clock was Friends. Rachel worked in the cafe as a waitress, and we always used to sit together on On the sofa. My dad would be in the middle, my mum would be next to my dad, my sister would be next to my mum, and I'd be next to my dad. And I used to have this pile of gaming magazines I used to read whilst watching TV. Xbox Magazine, Xbox Gamer. I would have 4 or 5 magazines piled up and I'd be reading them. I miss Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. That was a great show. It reminds me of when I was a teenager so much. The '90s— the '90s were good. TV was good in the '90s. I used to wake up at 6 AM every Saturday to watch Spider-Man. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Or was it Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles and they changed it to Ninja Turtles for some reason? I don't relate to Fresh Prince, I just found it funny. I can't believe Uncle Phil died. What's his name? Something Avery. The actor James Avery?

There's someone here smoking coke. Who is that? I don't know. Why do you interrupt my stream? I did take my shoes off.

I'm wearing slippers. Can't you see?

Western people.

My family takes their shoes off. I'll turn the lights off when they come inside. Is that a man or woman? I can't tell. What's that sound? I think it's a police car. Might be an ambulance. Nuclear bomb alert. That'd be great if they nuked us right now.

Content.

Japan being nuked livestream. At least something interesting would happen. I think I'm just gonna talk. I don't think this person understands what I'm saying anyway. If I just mumble in a really low voice— If they're gonna nuke Japan, at least do it after I've met Tomoko. That'd be so irritating if I died right before meeting her. Came all this way for nothing. The smoking person left again. How many fucking times are you gonna smoke?

Jesus Christ.

What is this chair? It's the most uncomfortable chair in the world. Okay, what were we talking about? TV shows. I also used to watch a show called Fastgate Does anyone remember it? It was about this astronaut from Earth who gets sucked into a wormhole, and then he ends up in this universe that's very far away, and then he ends up having sex with this alien woman who looks just like a human. It was called Farscape. I think his name was John Crichton, and it was really depressing. They had these weird-looking aliens all the time and he was always getting beaten up. What else did I watch? X-Men— was it X-Men Generations? It was the cartoon series. Was it the original one? I'm not sure. Oh, does anyone remember ReBoot? There was this 3D animated cartoon called ReBoot, and I think it was the first ever animated series. It was about these characters who lived inside of a computer. Oh, I remember ReBoot. system called the Mainframe, and there was a guardian called Bob, and he had to protect the Mainframe from this evil guy called Megabyte. And Megabyte was like this virus who was trying to corrupt the Mainframe. Yeah, X-Men Evolution, that's the one. Come on, none of you know what ReBoot is? Are you all really young? Anyone from the '90s here? No '90s kids? He had this gadget called the Glitch and it could do all these cool things. And he had a little— was it a little brother called— what was his name? Don't remember his name. What else did I watch? Oh, Hey Arnold! Hey Arnold was great. I loved that show. Hey Arnold and Arthur and what What else was there? I can't remember now.

Rugrats!

I used to watch those all the time. I think Hey Arnold was one of my favourites. Hey Arnold! I thought the girl with black hair was really cute. Rona was her name, the one with the blue shirt and the nerdy glasses. It had such a nice feeling when you watched it. I came home from school and I switched on TV and I'd watch Hey Arnold or Arthur, and it was so comforting watching it. Phoebe? I thought it was Rhona. I don't know, but it does sound like it was Phoebe now. She was that nerdy girl who was friends with Hel— was it Helga? Olga? Helga? The blonde girl who fancied Arnold. Recess. I used to hate recess. I didn't like it. Oh yeah, Rhonda. Oh yeah, there was Rhonda. Oh yeah, Rhonda was the one with the red shirt. I forgot.

Phoebe.

Those are great shows. I tried watching Rick and Morty, but I didn't get it. It just isn't funny. It just seems really dumb. And I find Rick's voice really irritating. I don't like Family Guy. I don't like American Dad. I don't like those really immature cartoons that seem to be trying to rip off The Simpsons. South Park. I hate South Park. People keep saying that you need a really high IQ to understand I can't stand Rick and Morty. It's so dumb. The humor is— I just don't find it funny. I can watch a whole episode and I won't even laugh. It's like really dumb humor. You need to be— you need to have the sense of humor of a 10-year-old to find it entertaining. Breaking Bad was good. I really liked it. I like those kind of TV shows where everything just gets worse and worse for the main characters, and they get into these really difficult situations. I think The Walking Dead went downhill after Shane died. They killed off too many good characters. I really liked Shane and Merle, and then Glenn died as well. And Rick's really boring now. I used to really like Rick. He was a bit of a prick at the beginning. He was cool. And then after about the prison, the prison series, he just, he kind of lost it. He became this cold-hearted killer who had no personality.

Carl. Carl!

When's Rick gonna be interesting again? I watched— I first started watching The Walking Dead with my French girlfriend back in 2011. We were lying in bed and she said, do you want to watch Walking Dead? I said, what's that? She said, oh my God, you haven't seen The Walking Dead? I said no. So she set up her laptop and we watched it in bed together. It was pretty interesting. I think we watched up to season 2 together. I couldn't stand my French girlfriend, and she had so many male friends it drove me crazy. Drove me crazy. And she completely ignored me during the day. We would be in the living room together and she would just completely ignore me. And she would say, I spend all night with you, Daniel. I want to spend the day with my friends. I guess makes sense. I got really jealous because there were other couples in the guesthouse, and I always saw them together, eating together, talking together, and I wanted to be like that. I didn't want a girlfriend who would just ignore me, ditch me for her friends all the time. There was this one time when She and the bisexual Japanese guy, they went to Shinjuku together, just the two of them. They didn't even invite me. The bisexual guy, he knocked on the French girl's room. We were in there together, and then he said, do you want to come to Shinjuku? He didn't even invite me, and she didn't even ask me if I wanted to go. So what the hell, you're gonna go on a date with the bisexual guy and just leave me here? I was really pissed off. We had a huge argument and we kind of broke up after that argument. But even after we broke up, I tried staying away from her. I tried sleeping in my own room, but then she would start banging on my door and then she would physically drag me out of my room to her room so we could have sex. And this went on for about 2 weeks, even though we had broken up. She would start crying and getting really drunk if I said that I wanted to sleep in my own room. And all the other guys in the guest house, they would be really playful with her. They would start massaging her or tickling her, and I used to hate it. Especially that black American guy who was really touchy-feely. He was always trying to massage girls in the guest house to try and sleep with them. My ex-Japanese girlfriend who was also staying in the same guest house, the one I nearly married, she also said that the black American guy, he tried— he came into her room and he was massaging her and he tried having sex with her, but she said no, but she had sex with me.

Haha.

You can see a picture of the French girl on my video titled The French Girlfriend. I used her picture as a thumbnail.

Uh, uh, what time is it?

It's 9 o'clock. Did I get her permission to do what? Of course not. I don't even talk to her. You guys think I get permission from my ex-girlfriends to use their pictures?

No.

I haven't even talked, talked to them for years. Who cares? They're all public photos anyway. It's not like they're secret. They're not secret photos they shared with me privately. They're public photos that you can find on their Facebook and social media. She wasn't white. She was Thai. She was born in Thailand. Her parents ditched her, and then a French couple adopted her, and then she grew up in France. But she was a really chubby Thai girl. She had a cute face, but she was really overweight. She didn't even have a waist. She had no feminine feminine figure. She had big boobs, but that was because she was fat. My perfect way to die. At the ripe old age of 80, in my bed, with a girl's mouth around my cock and a glass of wine in my hand. She must have been about 65 kg or 70. She was pretty large. This is Japan. So exciting. It feels so anticlimactic coming to Japan. You build up all this anticipation when you're at home. You start feeling, oh my God, I'm going to go to Japan soon, it's going to be amazing. all these things are gonna happen, and then you come here and you end up sitting on the rooftop talking to yourself, staring into the night. My girlfriend's on her period. She can't meet right now. She lives far away. Oh, look at the moon. I've already traveled everywhere in Japan. I've been all over Japan. I've been here 7 times. Nothing's new to me. Can we find the moon person? Focus, focus. It's not happening. There's the moon. Is it a full moon? It's not quite full. It's almost full. You can't see any stars? No, I can't see a single star, and it's a clear night. It's a nice night. There's a few clouds. I wonder if there's any panties up here. People hang their washing on the I wouldn't put my washing up on the roof. It might rain. Someone might steal it. I feel kind of depressed when I look at stars. It makes you feel really small. We're just— we're just one planet, and then you look into space and you see all these stars, and then there must be millions and millions and millions of stars, and then even more planets. It just makes you feel so small and insignificant. If you think about it, everything that happens on this stupid planet doesn't really matter at the end of the day. Nothing actually matters, does it? In a million years, what's gonna be— what's gonna happen to this place? It might not even exist. When does the sun blow up? Isn't that supposed to be a few billion years when the sun goes supernova? Everything just feels so pointless. That's the problem. What's the point in building a career or starting anything when we're gonna die soon? I am interested to see how, how the whole spacefaring goes. I'm interested to see, interested to see if we colonize other planets or if it becomes like Star Trek or Star Wars. Imagine if there's a sci-fi movie where everyone left the planet to look for a new planet and you were the only one left on Earth. Maybe you were in a coma and then you woke up one day and everyone was gone. What would you do? At first it would be pretty cool, just walking around the city completely alone. You could do anything you wanted to. And then I'd start to go a bit crazy. I would start walking around naked. And then I'd start smashing everything. I'd start setting things on fire. I would hijack a car and then try— attempt driving it and then crash it into things. And then I'd start to feel really lonely. Maybe I'd try getting back to the UK, back to my house, see what happened to my family. I think I'd go to one of those supermarkets and take one of those mannequins, try and find a Fleshlight, sellotape it to her legs, inside of her legs, and just have sex with it. See if I can find another human being to have sex with. Imagine if the only other human being was this gigantic black guy who wanted to butt rape you. That would be a nightmare. I need to piss again. I hope those 2 people cuddling aren't still there when I go back down. If they're still there, I would be really surprised. If they were there, that means they've heard everything that I've just said. I'm talking in a fairly loud voice and it's pretty quiet up here. What race do I hate? I hate Eskimos. They're so ugly. They're so stupid. Death to all Eskimos. Why don't they go to their room and cuddle? Why do they sit on— sit on the roof? Why do they sit next to the staircase cuddling on the sofa? Why don't they go to their rooms? I don't get it. I don't like people listening to what I speak about because it's embarrassing. I hate it when people are listening to my conversation. I didn't give you permission to listen to what I'm talking about. Stop listening. I don't like going to restaurants and then you sit down at the table and then next to you is a stranger. Or a family of strangers, and they can hear everything you're saying. Yeah, $2. Thanks. I feel slightly less depressed now. I don't mind the internet listening because you're not actually here. You're not next to me, are you? How much do I masturbate? At least 2 times a day. I don't know how many islands there are in Japan. There's a lot of islands. Tiny islands, big islands.

$1.

You're so generous. I love you. I want to make babies with you. Oh shit, those people are still there. I just heard a girl laughing. I'm pretty sure that's the Scottish guy. The one I saw on my first night here. There was this white guy with really long hair that looked like spaghetti. And I think he was saying something about Scottish. And he was sitting with this Japanese girl. I think it's the same girl. He doesn't talk to anyone though. I never see him just hanging around with other people. I bet he thinks he's so superior because he has a Japanese girlfriend. Oh, look at me, I have a Japanese girlfriend. You all— you guys are all a bunch of losers. For $1,000, I will strip naked and go into the living room. My last dream— I had this really weird dream the other night that I was having a fight with my dad, like a physical fight, and I was beating the shit out of him. out of my dad, and then I put him in a chokehold with my legs, and his face went all red and he was choking. And then I woke up and I felt so bad. I felt terrible. Sometimes I feel like I'm a really bad son. I wish I had a better relationship with my dad, but I just feel so disconnected from him. If me and Tomoko have babies, it'll be 75% Asian, 25% white. It won't even look white at all, will it? I don't think I want to make a video meeting her or a livestream meeting her. I want some privacy for a first meeting. I already have some whiskey in my room. I have Hakushu whiskey, and I have some highball. I just think my dad's so boring. He doesn't show any interest in anything I do. He never asks me things like, hey Daniel, how's YouTube going? How's translating going? He didn't even ask me how my drawing contract with George is going. He doesn't show any interest in my life. He doesn't even— he didn't even ask me what happened to my last girlfriend. He doesn't even know if I broke up with my last girlfriend, if I have a new one. He didn't even ask me how it went, what she was like, what I did, what happened to us. He didn't ask us anything. It's like he doesn't care. He has this way of thinking that's like, it's none of my business, it's their personal life, so I'm not gonna ask them questions about it. My mum's the complete opposite. She'll just ask everything. She doesn't care about privacy. I just think it's weird. How can you not have any interest in what your son is doing? If my son had a girlfriend, I'd be like, what's she like? Where's she from? Did you get on well? Did you have sex? Are you gonna see her again? I wouldn't just not show any interest.

I don't know.

My mum and dad don't get along. They argue all the time. My mum says things like she, she wants to run away, she wants to get a divorce. She says stuff like that all the time. There's no affection between them. They're always fighting, arguing. They have huge arguments about really stupid things. For example, a candle. My mum will light a candle, then she'll leave the room for 5 or 10 minutes, then my dad puts the candle out because he thinks it's gonna burn the house down. And then my mum comes back 10 minutes later and she starts shouting, why did you put out my candle? Why can't you leave my things alone? And then they both start shouting. I don't know. And then there was this other incident with toothpicks. My mum leaves toothpicks lying around sometimes. My dad found one and he got really angry. He said, can you not leave toothpicks lying around the house? And then my mum told him to shut up, and then he was like, don't tell me to shut up! If someone at work told me to shut If he didn't shut up, I'd punch him in the face. He said that. But I can kind of understand both of them. My dad comes home from work, he's tired, he's hungry, and then my mum's telling him to shut up and shouting at him. It would drive me crazy as well. But then I can understand my mum as well because my dad's really irritating. He has OCD. He's always tidying up the place and then moaning at people for making a mess. They're both irritating, to be honest. My mum just talks on and on and on about really boring things. She always talks about her work, like so-and-so did this today, so-and-so did that today. And she'll go on and on for hours. And me and my dad were just sitting there listening to it. And then I lose my temper and I say, Mum, can you be quiet? We don't care. And then she gets upset. It's like there's something wrong with her. Most normal people, if they're talking about something and then you see the person you're talking to Not show any interest, or they're sighing, or they're not actually responding, then that's a good sign that they don't really care about what you're talking about, and then you stop talking. But my mum, it's like she doesn't care that we don't care, or that she doesn't realize that we don't care, and she just talks on and on anyway. And my dad doesn't know how to— my dad doesn't know how to talk to my mum. Because he doesn't know how to dumb down his English to make it easier to understand. He always uses these big words that my mum doesn't even know what they mean. They need marriage counseling, to be honest. People change. My mum was a nice, sweet lady when she was younger. Quiet, well-mannered. And then she became an old woman. Now she's basically like one of those stereotypical angry Asian women. Angry Asian old woman shouting all the time. I don't really think it's anything to do with race. It happens to a lot of couples, same-race couples. People just get fed up with each other. After you've spent 30 years together, every single day living together, you get on each other's nerves. It's not just the language barrier. My dad's interested in talking about politics, science, technology. My mum doesn't care about those things. She's interested about— she's interested in gossiping about work colleagues. My parents don't even sleep together. I don't think my dad can even have sex anymore. He had prostate cancer and he had radiotherapy for his prostate gland, so I'm not sure if he can— does that even make any sense? Do you need your prostate gland to have sex? You need your prostate gland to ejaculate, right? But you can still get an erection, can't you? But my dad just doesn't seem the type that's interested in having Yeah, I know Ryan Brown— Ryan Boundless. He's weird. He looks weird. I don't, I don't really know anything about him, but just from looking at his face, he looks weird. The way he speaks is weird as well.

Smoking person's back. How many fucking times you gonna smoke in a night? It's the third time.

Ryan's face looks like someone chucks acid at him and then he had reconstructive surgery to repair his face. There's something artificial about his face. I'm not quite sure what it is. Is that person still there?

That person's weird.

That person comes and then they smoke for about 20 seconds and they go, and then 10 minutes later they come back again, smoke for another 20 seconds. What the hell? How can you smoke so quickly. Are Korean chicks worth it? No, don't like Korean girls. People think that I, I only like Asian girls, like I— if she's Asian then that's okay, but it's not. I only like Japanese girls. All the other Asian girls I dislike as much as I dislike white girls or black girls. I don't know why she's crying. She keeps saying that she can't hear me. You guys can hear me, right? Maybe turn up your volume then. I don't know. Because I can speak Japanese. I spent so much of my life learning how to speak Japanese. If I don't have a Japanese girlfriend, then what's the point in being able to speak Japanese? That's like training yourself to play tennis for 10 years of your life and then Imagine going to a country where tennis is banned. If you trained to play tennis for 10 years of your life, you're gonna go to a country where everyone loves to play tennis, right? Makes sense. If I stop using Japanese, then I've just wasted the last 10 years of my life learning to speak Japanese, right? I've only had sex with one Korean girl, so I don't really know. I learnt Korean as well. Korean is pretty much the same as Japanese except for the alphabet looks different and the words are different, but the grammar is almost identical. A lot of words sound the same. There was a time when I was really into Korean girls. That's why I was so desperate to learn Korean. But I don't really find Korean girls attractive anymore. They all have the same hairstyle, it's so boring. They all wear too much makeup. Chinese girls don't interest me. I wouldn't mind having a Western girlfriend if she looks Asian. That would be my second choice. American English, fine. But if she looks Asian, then that's okay. I don't really care about pubic hair. It doesn't bother me. No Latinos, no. No, I don't like Latina. They scare me. You know, they have all the tattoos, and then their brother might be in a gang. They might kidnap me and saw off my legs. I don't really see what the big fuss about pubic hair is. Just use some scissors and trim it. No one likes a really big bush, and shaving is a pain because when it grows back it gets really tickly. I'm not really interested in Taiwanese girls either. They're like a poor man's Japanese girl. I don't like Thai girls either. There's something about the kind of face that Thai girls have that I'm not into. They have mustaches. Have you noticed this? Thai girls usually have mustaches. Especially my French girlfriend, she had a fairly visible mustache. I kept thinking to myself, why don't you shave it off? I'm not interested in Malay girls. I'm not interested in Malay, Filipinos, Indonesians, Thai. I'd rather have a white girlfriend than a Southeast Asian girlfriend.

Why?

Arab girls? No, definitely not. Muslim, Middle Eastern? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. The whole Middle Eastern region is just a huge no. And they have huge noses. I don't like— I don't find huge noses to be attractive on girls. Why is everyone so interested in what kind of girls I like? Why do I have to love all kinds of girls equally? I can have preferences. There's nothing wrong with having a certain type of girl that you like. Looks are important. No, I'm not interested in black girls. Maybe a black girl who has Asian features would be attractive. Just because I'm not interested in having sex with a certain type of girl doesn't mean I'm racist. That's like saying, if you're not interested in having sex with men, you're sexist. No, it just means I'm not interested in having sex with men. I don't have to like everyone. It's not based on stereotypes. It's based on what they look like. Humans all look different, and I think some of them look more attractive than others. Nothing wrong with that. I like feminine features, feminine frames, slim frames. I don't want a huge girlfriend who has broad shoulders and a giant jaw with a big nose. Indian girls? No, I'm not interested in Indian girls. Indian girls have really big noses, and I don't like all the family culture stuff that Indian people have. They're too family orientated, too traditional. I don't like traditional people. It's too much work, too much hassle.

Wait, there's someone here.

I know there's some people that don't fit the stereotype. But those are minorities. They're exceptions. They're rare. I'm just talking in general.

What?

Usagi.

Usagi? Ah, usagi.

Mm-hmm.

It's not there. It's not there. There's a bunch of people behind me.

Pamiraso Pamichi. Hanku do te gun Pamichi. Hang on, man. It's okay. I'll see you.

The smoking again.

Should I go back to my room? I can't talk now.

Did you see them? Guys, did you see them? Did you see the guy with the long hair? Huh.

That was the women's floor. That was the women's floor.

This is my room.

Home sweet home. I was on the women's floor just now. I need to pee. Wait, this is my my room. If I met a girl who who was really attracted. then I would date her even if she was not Japanese. But in my experience, I've never met a girl who— I haven't met attractive girls who are not Japanese and who are interested in me. Oh, I need to charge my phone. That girl was staring at me really strangely because I was on the women's floor. She must have been like, what's What's this guy doing on the women's floor? Is he a pervert?

Yes, I'm a pervert. Fuck you. Charger.

Maybe I can use my microphone. Busting out the Blue Yeti. 24-hour livestream, never done before. This my old friend. The thing is, I can't plug in my microphone and the charger at the same time. This is the new vlogging No more 10-minute vlogs.

24-hour vlogs.

I really need to piss. There's someone outside my room.

Okay.

It'd be nice to have a kettle. I should buy a kettle so I can make coffee. What are you saying?

I need to pee.

Is anyone there?

No.

Look, I have rum-flavored chocolate.

Ah, it's good.

Mm-hmm.

That's good stuff.

Oh no, I'm getting chocolate on my shirt.

Oh, I need to charge my battery. I need to charge this as well.

Look, look at this. This is why the LG is the best phone ever.

Exchangeable battery.

Oh look, there's a new software update for Apple. iOS 11. Anything interesting? Maybe, maybe not. I want to plug in my Blue Yeti, but I need to charge my phone up for a bit. I wish I brought my penis lamp. I didn't have room in my luggage to bring it.

Okay.

Does this sound better? But the lighting's so bad here. We're not meeting tomorrow. We're meeting in a few days. Soon, guys, soon. We'll see if this whole trip was worth the time. I need to buy a kettle. And I can make coffee in my room. This pillow wasn't that good. It was okay. It's still kind of hard to sleep like this. It's still a bit painful.

It's not good.

Should I propose to Tomoko on our first date?

Hello and welcome to the late night stream with Daniel. Is this working? Is it working? Does it sound better with this microphone?

If I put this here— look, it's balancing on this drawer.

Ah.

Any interesting comments?

Not really.

I did ASMR cooking and it got terrible views. Look, I did how to cook chicken— no, pork. How to make Japanese tonkatsu ASMR cooking. It only got 1,700 views. And then my video talking about the smell of ass got 5,000 views. I have a gaming channel, I have a drawing channel.

We fell over.

I have this video on my I did a gaming channel called Man Making Sexual Noises ASMR Sound Effects. It got 11,000 views, but it got demonetized. And I did Man Out of Breath Sound Effects, 971 views. Man Snoring Sound Effects, 569 views. Talking about sex gets more views.

What's Old Greg?

Man ejaculating ASMR. Taking a shit ASMR. What's your question? Lonely Man 2? I'm not making it. I started to make it, but I got bored. Let me show you.

Hello. Hello.

That's as much as I did, then I got bored. This is my animation— animating skills. I'll show you the first one. Has anyone seen my first one? Lonely Man, uh, number 1. It's the very first video on this channel. Let me try and find it. Well, 4,855 subscribers. We're gonna reach 5,000 soon. Maybe in a few weeks' time we'll have 5,000 subscribers.

Lonely guy.

Okay, I made this about 2 years ago.

Wait, take it out.

I was feeling so depressed when I made this. When did I make it? I think it was 2 years ago. I used to make lots of animations like that, and all of them were really sexual, perverted, and it got my last YouTube channel banned. The animation program, um, it was something on the App Store. Animation HD. This one. I'm too lazy to do animations anymore. It takes so much time. And that video didn't even get many views. It got 500 views after 2 years. 500 views. I can get— I can get thousands of views just by talking about sexual stuff. If something takes too much effort to do and you're not getting rewarded for it enough, then it's not worth doing. Animating takes a lot of time.

And effort.

Do I get money for what? I don't think I made any money on that lonely guy video. I'll check. It's not supposed to have commentary. The point of it was to tell a story without any talking. I want it to be like a visual thing. The idea was that the girl dies and then she knocks on his door. That's at the end of that video, and then he answers the door. And then there's a note and it says, meet me at the graveyard. And then he goes to the graveyard and it's the ghost of the woman who died, who he was in love with. And then he commits suicide, and then he also becomes a ghost so he can be together with her. And then they fly off into the night together. That was the story idea. But I don't feel like doing it anymore. The crying voice was— I just looked up on YouTube man crying sound effects, and then I downloaded it and used that. Oh, that video did make some money. It made 28 cents.

Look.

After 2 years. 28 cents. It's not really worth the time, is it? I could find 28 cents lying on the floor. How much my most popular video made? Um, the one about Sayaka made a lot of money. The A White Guy Stole My Japanese Girlfriend video. That actually made a lot of ad revenue for some reason. It has 17,000 views. Jesus, I haven't checked it for a while. Let's see, estimated revenue lifetime, $13.91. It's not bad. So it's about $14. The Elliot Rodger one, it was demonetized, but it recently got monetized again. So, so about 50,000 of the views weren't monetized. Let's see, it has 61,000 views now. I've made $6 on the Elliot Rodger video, but I gained so many subscribers from that video that it's, it's indirectly made me more money because people subscribed and then they watched the other videos. Who's spamming that Turkish stuff?

Timeout.

$6. Yeah, $6. If the whole 61,000 views got monetized, then it would have over $60. Opinion videos about other YouTubers. I don't really have any opinions on other YouTubers though. Maybe I can do one about Gimme a Break Man. My thoughts on Gimme a Break Man. I guess I should make one about someone who's really famous though, like PewDiePie or something. But that's not what the channel's about. The channel's about me moaning about stuff, talking about my life. How do I have fans? Because I'm so funny and good-looking. I am interacting. I'm hungry again. I feel like eating something.

Hup.

I'm hungry again. I keep getting hungry. Should we go back to the supermarket? I need to change batteries again. I don't know my sister's channel. She doesn't upload. She has 2 or 3 videos photoshopping a picture.

15% battery.

I think the supermarket should be open. It was open a few nights ago at half past 12, midnight. Am I jealous of my sister? No. Why? I think my sister's life looks kind of boring, actually. I don't know. She has a nice job. She has a nice boyfriend. Her boyfriend's nice. Everything's nice, I guess. But I wouldn't want her life. I think from my perspective, I think my sister's life looks a bit boring. My sister's learning Turkish because her boyfriend's family's from Turkey. He's not Muslim. His family—

whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Where are you going? Blue Yeti.

Stay.

Should I go to the supermarket with this around my neck?

Uh-uh.

I think my sister does have some kind of social anxiety. She said when she went to her friend's wedding, she was— she was sitting in the car or the toilet or something, trying to prepare, trying to prepare herself to go out into the party. But she seems quite social to me. Girls don't have to make any effort. They can just sit there and guys will come up to them because that's the guy's job, isn't it? To be the man, talk to the girl. The girl can just sit there looking pretty. That's what I do, but it doesn't really work. Girls don't usually approach me. This is cow piss. Cow piss soda. Smells a bit like cum. Karu Pisu. Japanese are really bad at naming their brands. Why would you call it cow piss? It sounds like cow's piss.

Why?

It doesn't even make sense in Japanese. It's not a Japanese word. Look, it's spelled in English. C-A-L-P-I-S. Calpis. Is this what being a grown-up is like? Have your own place? Is this what being independent's like? It says I have low battery. 6% battery. Okay, I'm unplugging the Blue Yeti. Plugging in the new one. Plugging in the charger.

Uh.

That's my pillow. What do you think? I kind of want to buy a new pillow from the supermarket. This one isn't very comfortable. I spent— I spent about $25 for the rental Wi-Fi for the week. That's too far away. It uses up about 3 gigabytes of data for a 4-hour livestream. Are my lips cracking? They're not cracking, you liar.

No, not my lips.

Why does that person keep spamming? Why does he keep spamming Turkish? Turkish people have huge noses. Burt's Beeswax. I keep reading this as ears— earwax. Burt's Earswax. Earswax. Earwax. Why is earwax so bitter? Maybe you can use earwax as hair wax. Hehe, look, it's work— it's working. Self-produced hair wax. Do I like the peppermint sensation on my lips?

Yeah, it's very nice. It's very nice.

I think I should end the stream. I need a rest.

Go downstairs.

I don't want to sit in the living room again and get completely ignored. That was so depressing yesterday. Our only hope I think it's the Canadian guy. My battery keeps running out. It's really irritating. Livestreaming takes up a lot of battery. I could make a coffee and pretend to be doing something, see if someone approaches me. I have a power bank. But then I have to carry it around.

Huh.

If I sit in the middle of the room, then they'll see my screen and they'll see me filming everything. It's a lot more difficult to try and make small talk when when I'm live streaming, when I have. 50 people watching me do it. What did X-kun say? I am reading comments, but you keep asking the same questions. Some of you are speaking in Turkish. Some of you are talking in Russian. I don't know. It's not really much to respond to. I don't know who Maggie Bon is. Do I watch Japanese drama?

No.

I watch Ice Poseidon and Total Biscuit. That's it. My side profile. I feel tired. Trying to think what I should do now. I want to go and get something to eat and make a coffee. And maybe livestream in the living room? We can do some more secret streaming. We can go to the konbini, prepare the coffee. I take my coffee black. No milk, no sugar. Eat the coffee straight from the container.

Ugh!

It tastes like armpit. It was like licking someone's armpit. It was like 10 armpits in one lick. It was so powerful. Maybe I should just lick one.

No.

Coffee and beer taste like armpit. Do I play Vainglory? Not recently because it's too laggy. It keeps connecting me to the European server and I'm not in Europe, so it's really laggy. Did anyone get the new iPhone? iPhone 8? Or is it iPhone X?

iPhone X.

Android's the best. iPhone, you can't change batteries. You can't do this with an iPhone. I like LG. LG is really good. I think LG is my best, my favorite phone so far. LG G5. My dad has brown hair. Yes. And you can use— what was that? You can also use expandable memory, so I have a 64GB SD card in there, which is pretty nice.

Hehehe.

I don't download porn. I watch a new porn every time. I don't watch the same ones unless I don't feel like searching for new ones. Then I just watch one that I saved so I don't have to look for a new one, but I just bookmark it. I don't save it to my phone. I don't download it. Would I go berserk if my girlfriend refuses to meet me? Not really. I would just find someone else. I'm gonna be aching all over after Saturday. My abs are gonna be in pain, my biceps, my shoulders. I haven't used these muscles for— since April, the last time I had sex. You know, the sexual muscles. The abs are very important when you have sex. It's a lot of tensing. Also these muscles, because, you know, you have your elbows down on the mattress and then you brace— you're putting all your body weight onto your elbows basically. And then you're using your stomach muscles to thrust. So I think I'm gonna be in a lot of pain afterwards.

What the fuck? What's that?

I need to buy more water. The tap water tastes weird. It tastes funny, like it has something in it. When am I going to the restaurant? I already went to the restaurant. That was hours ago. Maybe I should end the stream. If you send me a Super Chat, I'll go to a different restaurant. You have to buy me dinner. I'm not putting out for free. I'm tired.

Bye, Ravenous.

I'm talking to my girlfriend. We're going to the convenience store soon. Oh, $2!

Twenty!

I love you. Okay, let's go. We got $2.

It's action time. It's action time.

Do I wash my clothes? But they don't smell. They smell nice. They smell like me. I need to change batteries. There's someone shouting outside. Should we go and investigate? Okay, but I need To change batteries first. Can you guys wait for a few minutes? Come on, we need more money. This is all the money I have. 100, 300, 350, 380. Have I been streaming for 6 6 hours? Are you sure? I need to find my, my shrapnel. 380, 390, 400 yen. 430. 450.

460.

60, 70, 80, 90, 100. Hi Raiden, how are you? How's it going? I have ¥500 here. My fingers are really long. Yeah, I'm not doing too badly. Not too bad. Had a good day. We need battery. What the hell was that noise? Yeah, we walked around. For about 4 hours. I went into a restaurant, into Denny's, and I ordered a burger all by myself. And we met some cats, we touched some— we stroked some pussy in the park, and then we came back here to rest. Now I'm gonna go back out to get more food. I need some battery though. My battery here's still charging, and this battery is on 15%, so I need to switch over.

That's a baby crying.

Raiden reminds me of that character in Mortal Kombat, the one with the electricity and the hat. Raiden, or is it Raiden? Look, we use five gigabytes of data live streaming. Five gigabytes. Okay, let's go to the computer. Need to swap batteries. Guys, can you wait 2 minutes so I can swatch— switch batteries? Yeah, everyone go to the Discord server. Join the Discord server, it's in the description of all the videos. Does everyone know that we have a Discord server where we chat? Okay, I'm changing batteries. Can't someone link the Discord invite into the live chat whilst I change batteries? It should be in my— it should be in the description for the last video, for the video title. Do I regret coming to Japan? Okay, we're changing batteries now.

Okay.

Let's go.

Shit, someone's coming. Okay, let's go. Do I look cool? How do I look?

Do I look trendy? It's kind of cold. That's weird.

Look at this white guy. Where is that?

It's actually a bit cold. Strange. I can finally wear my hoodie and my cool shorts. You're blocked on Discord? I made the security settings so you need to be a member of the Discord server for at least 10 minutes before you can start posting. Is that an electric car? That's an electric car! It has no exhaust pipe. Did you see that? It had no exhaust pipe and it made almost no sound when it was accelerating. That was so cool.

We're being followed.

We forgot our coffee! I left the coffee in my room. Damn it, I knew I forgot something.

Soda Poppin'.

I've heard of Soda Poppin' and Reckful before, but I've never seen them before. I watch Ice Poseidon and that Andy guy. What should I get? What's this?

Cognac.

They're in Japan. I watched Reckful, but it was just him and A bunch of people sitting in a restaurant eating stuff. It was really boring.

Ouch.

I don't know what to get. Oh, Blendy Stick.

Black.

¥120. My streams are way better. I do interesting things like going to restaurants by myself. I'm wearing slippers.

Here it is.

That guy looks pretty busy. Oh, look, you can get underwear, panties. I want to get a drink as well since I forgot my coffee. I shall get— is there any hot chocolate? What about a coffee?

Ooh, ¥100.

Maybe I should be healthy, get one of these vegetable drinks. Multivitamin. Look at this, a whole day's worth of vegetables. Vitamin C, calcium, magnesium.

Calcium.

Tomato and broccoli juice. Sounds delicious! This has vitamin C, calcium, B-carotene, cadmium. What's cadmium? Magnesium. Okay, if I make you a moderator, Raiden, you should be able to post links. Oh, I can't. I can't make you a moderator. I can report you, I can remove you, I can put you on a timeout, or I can block you. Sorry, I can't make you a moderator. Go onto one of my older videos, look at the description. And there should be a link for the Discord. Let's get one of these. One day's worth of vegetables. Tomato and broccoli, carrots and some This is ¥108, so I have ¥390 remaining. I'll get a sandwich. Do do do do do do do. I got a ham sandwich and I got one day's worth of vegetables in liquid form for 430, 428 yen. Pretty good deal. Got rid of some shrapnel. My pocket's a lot lighter. I feel pretty good. Let's see if anyone will talk to me in the living room. ありがとうございます。ありがとうございます。 I love Japanese stores. Look at this rubbish. Hey, look, it's flashing.

お 帰 り。 ただ い ま。 どう する？ 大丈夫？ あれ は 仕 事 じゃない の か よ。 大丈夫 の 火 曜 日 は 知 ら ん。 え っと ね、 手 帳 見 た ら わか る けど、 今 部 屋 に ある。 そう で いい わ。 うん。 明 日 いる んです か？ I said tadaima.

What are you talking about? I just said it a bit late. I was just kind of surprised that someone actually greeted me. Where's that plastic cup? It took me some time to think of a response when she said, "Okairi." I'm not used to being greeted like that.

下 敷 き に 入 れて、 ね、 下 も 下 敷 き に 入 れて、 白 い の 服 と 黄 色 い の 服 は 一 緒 に 着 て、 白 い の 服 は 色 は 白 い 白 い 白 い って いうこと です。 あ、 そう いうこと。 はい はい はい。 こんな もの が ある んだ。 白 い の 白 い の 服。 We miss another one from the funny story.

We have another version that was Pandoro.

Pandoro?

Pandoro and the funny story. One is without anything, is just Help me. Ay, ay, mi amor.

Ay, ay, mi amor.

How dare they ignore me? How dare they? To be honest, I don't. I don't really want to talk to them. They're all guys. Maybe if there was a bunch of cute girls, then I'd be interested in talking to them, but I don't really want to talk to them. I just feel kind of irritated that they don't even acknowledge my existence. How dare they? I'm Daniel, for fuck's sake. Acknowledging their existence right now.

I'm looking at the phone.

I'm reading chat. This is why my testicles are so small, because I always sit cross-legged. See, this is a new person. This woman. That's how you. That's how you interact with people.

Watch her. Oh shit!

She's gonna shake my hands.

Fuck, don't come here.

Don't come here. You see, look, she sits with them instead of at the other side of the room. How can she just sit there right in front of them? She doesn't even know them. She must have balls of steel. Look at that body language. She's lifting up her hair, opening herself. Up to everyone, she's saying, "Hey guys, I'm open for conversation." She has a boyfriend. She said she went to meet her boyfriend today.

This is so. Where's the Canadian guy? 参 加 参 加 協 議 決 ま ってる し、 参 加 協 議 決 ま ってる し。 ああ 出 る んです か？ 出 る 出 る 出 ます わ。 Bed waiting for me, guys. She's in bed waiting for me. Japanese chat. Hiroshima? Okay, thank you.

Oh, he got it. It's all right.

Help me.

Next, Japan is more like a lot of, you know, love song. But before, you know, like, it's Japan. X is more like— 61% battery remaining. I'm using I went to life for like four or five times.

That's high school.

A spider must be patient. Maybe I should walk out and walk back in.

Oh shit, she's coming over. Oh shit, she's going, she's going.

That girl's This scares me. They left at the same time. Suspicious. Maybe if we go and get more food and come back in. I don't have any money.

I've got— shit.

40, 60, 70 yen. I can't buy anything for 70 yen.

Uh. Why does that guy?

Keep walking up and down. Keeps walking up and down, so irritating.

But this is the real beauty.

This.

Oh, it's a boy. It's a boy.

This guy is alone as well.

It's not just me. I think he's Chinese. He's not listening. Oh fuck, there's people out there as well.

I'm sure a lot of people, you know, like I hate it. I'm alive, guys. I made it. Oh, it's like suffocating. It feels like I'm drowning in there. Oh, which way should we go?

I don't know.

Okay, the situation is tricky. Number one, I want to be noticed by them, but number two, I don't really want to talk to them. They don't seem like interesting people, and I don't want to have sex with any of them, so what's the point in talking to them? And if they did approach me and they started to talk to me, I would be stuck talking to them and it would be very awkward. You know that guy with the cap who kept walking up and down? I've talked to him before. His name is Sid. He's from Bangladesh. He's boring as fuck and I don't want to talk to him. But I need some kind of— there needs to be a benefit from talking to them. I need to be able to get something out of it. I'm cold. I'm not boring. I'm the most interesting person in How dare you. It's cold. Why is it so cold? The guest house reminds you of a giant sex bar. That's what it used to be like. 7 years ago, it was a sex place. You could hook up so easily. I hooked up with 2 girls at the guest house back in the day. You know, now it's just shit.

No one's talking to me.

The atmosphere's horrible. I hate the atmosphere in there. It seems like a homeless shelter for mating. It's so boring. You know that guy in the white shirt? I've talked to him before. He's Japanese. He flies planes. He flies those small private planes. And he used to live in America. He's pretty cool. He used to talk to me. He used to say hello. But the thing is, people stop talking to me after a while because they realize that I don't talk to them.

No.

Sometimes I say hello to him, but that's it. We don't talk. We don't have a conversation. People start to get fed up and they stop saying hello to me because I don't start a conversation. I don't say things like, so how was your How was your day? Where are you going? What are you doing today? I don't ask those questions. He didn't ask me either. Why is it my fault? They never asked. No one ever asked me, so Daniel, what did you do today? How was your day? Why do I have to ask them? Huh?

Why?

Do do do do do. When the Canadian guy is there, I ask him, I say, what have you been doing today? The only person I feel comfortable with is the Canadian guy because he seems friendly, but I feel really intimidated by everyone else. Canadian people don't make me feel intimidated. Why can't there be more Canadians? Where can I go to meet more Canadian people? There's hardly any here. Maybe I should just go to Canadia. I think I'm starting to get a pimple here. I can feel pain. It's gonna swell up and then be a big red spot for the next week. Great, that's gonna help with my confidence, isn't it? Ah, look at this place.

So boring.

I think I'm gonna call it a day. I feel like I achieved one thing here, one thing today. We went to a restaurant by ourselves. I've never done that before. It wasn't too bad. What should we do next time? Karaoke? Maybe next time we can go to a bar, like a pub. I have to return this pocket Wi-Fi on Saturday, and then we're back to the pixelated stuff, the shitty pixelated videos. It's too expensive. I can't rent 2 Wi-Fis at the same time. Well, I could, but I don't really want to. I'd be paying £120 every month for 2 pocket Wi-Fis.

I'm not sure if I can do it.

Having a job isn't really, really the problem. Even— let's just say I had a job right now and I had £1 million in my bank. What difference is that going to make? I'm still going to feel lonely. I'm still going to feel like I don't know how to connect with people. I'm still going to feel afraid of people. You can't fix that with money or having a job. Tomoko's waiting in my room, in my bed, naked. Should I just go back to my room?

I'm coming.

I'm coming. What if she doesn't turn up? Ask her yourself. Such a lonely day, and it's my the most lonely day of my life.

Look at the road.

I want to get something from the shop and then go back into the living room. I don't think I can face it, actually. I've only got ¥70. I can't go back in. It's too stressful. I need to reset. I need to get refreshed. Staying in the living room for too long makes me feel really depressed. I can't get anything for ¥70. It's, it's maybe 50p, 60p, 60p. Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. I hope those people still aren't outside the entrance of the guest house. That girl in black, she always talks to me. It was her birthday party last time. But I'm not really— I don't know. She did. She said okairi to me. Welcome home. Last time she said something else. And she invited me to her birthday party. They might still be outside. Then she might say Hokkaido again. I think I'm gonna head back, watch some YouTube. Well, she, she did talk to me. If she said words at me, that means she talked. She didn't use telepathy. She opened her mouth and words came out. That's what talking is, isn't it? Sounds like they're singing Spanish songs in there. Are they still sitting outside the guest house? I want to check to see if they're still out there. We have to sneak back into my room.

Are they there? I can't hear talking, so it must mean they're not there.

Do do do do do. Do do do do do do do. Do do do. Do do do do do. Do do do. Do do do do do. Do do do. Do do do do do. Do do do do do do do. They're not there.

The coast is clear.

Forgot my coffee. That was why it failed. If I had my coffee with me, we could have I had a party. But no, we had to forget our coffee. Oh, we forgot to buy water. My door is locked. See? Okay, who wants to get naked?

Stupid clothes.

I'm gonna floss.

I don't want—

I don't want to show you my flossing.

I need the toilet. I need the toilet. This stupid shirt keeps dropping.

Onto the floor.

Stay there.

Stay. This stuff doesn't work. It doesn't work? I tried it on my spot before. It doesn't do anything.

I'm going to bed. I'm going to bed.

Good stream. Quality content. Same time tomorrow.

Bye. Bye.