what was the argument about

Hi, so in my last video I titled it,

um, walking through the rain after having

a massive argument with my wife, and I

want to explain what the argument was. It

was basically about the fish. You might be

aware that I got some goldfish,

and we had this argument about the fish

because— where do I even begin with this

story? Okay, let me try and explain to you

why I got the fish in the first place.

For some stupid reason, I thought,

I thought I could get views by getting a

pet fish and then making a video about it.

But as you probably know, that completely

failed. That plan, the plan completely

backfired, and the video has a pathetic

10K views. I don't know why I was so

stupid. I don't know why I thought people

would be interested in a video about fish.

I'm sorry, fishies, but you're just not

that interesting.

Um, yeah, so I decided to get some fish

for a video, and I'm

trying to— I'm trying to remember why,

why I had this genius idea all of a

sudden. Oh yeah, that's why. So 7 or 8

years ago, you might remember that I used

to have a French girlfriend, and for some

reason I was thinking about her suddenly.

And I remember this one day when we were

together in Japan and she said to me,

let's go and buy fish. And I said, okay.

And she took me to this little shop. It

was like a very tiny, dingy, dark little

shop that was run by an old Japanese guy.

We just walked in. He had loads of fish

tanks and She just paid about

$2 for 2 fish. He gave us 2

fish in a plastic bag full of water, and

we just got a little bowl, and it cost

us about not even $10 in total. So I

thought, what if I just spent $10,

get some fish, surprise my wife, do a

GoPro walk into a shop? It'll be funny.

There'll be like an awkward interaction

between me and the goldfish selling

person, and it'll be an interesting video.

Maybe, maybe people would click it because

it's something that you wouldn't really

expect from my channel. So I said to my

wife, I'm gonna get fish to make a video

about it. And then she, she was quite

interested. She said she wanted to get

some fish anyway. She was thinking about

getting some fish, and she said, why don't

you wait until it's my day off and we can

go to the fish shop the pet store

together. So I thought, oh, that sounds,

that sounds good. I don't have to worry

about interacting with the Japanese

salesperson. We can make it into a fun

little vlog together. So she took me to

this massive pet store that had lots of

different pets— cats, rabbits, dogs,

lizards, hamsters, and fish— and

it was quite an impressive pet store. And

we started talking— well, she started

talking to the person working there,

and they started bringing all this stuff.

And I started to feel regret.

I started to feel like this is a bad idea.

This is going to cost me a lot of money.

Look at all this stuff they made us buy.

They brought over a tank, a filter pump

thing, these plants. The gravel at the

bottom, the light, the fish food, the

disinfectant kalium water thing,

and in total it cost me $120.

So I didn't make any money from getting

the fish. The only reason I wanted to get

the fish in the first place was because I

wanted to make a video about it. I'm not

really that interested in having fish. I

guess they're kind of Cute.

They don't really do much though. It's

funny because when you, when you come

around the corner and you stand in front

of the tank, they start swimming around

excitedly looking at you. I wonder if

they recognize me. I think they remember

that I give them food, so they get excited

when they see me because they associate me

And I started whinging about how expensive

it was. I said to my wife, oh, I didn't

think it'd be so expensive. I'm not going

to make any money from doing this. I

thought we would just go in there and

spend about $10 or $20, get a couple fish,

get a little bowl, and then I'll make a

video that will make $50 and I'll have $30

profit. But what happened in reality was

I ended up spending $120 and the video

completely flopped, even though I

clickbait titled it with the cat in the

thumbnail, trying to trick people into

thinking we got a cat. I thought if we got

a cat, that would definitely get views.

So I pretended we got a cat and that

didn't work. So then I changed it back to

we got a fish. That didn't work. I changed

the title and the thumbnail about 700

billion times.

And I wasn't very happy about it because I

looked at my analytics and the video only

made about $30 in total. So I spent $120

in total to make $30,

and I had a bit of a whinge about it to my

wife. I said, oh, I didn't think we'd

spend so much. When I was with the French

girlfriend, we only spent a couple

dollars. And my wife gets very angry when

I start talking about my ex-girlfriends,

or when I compare our situation

or things she does to my ex-girlfriends.

She gets very annoyed, and I didn't think

before I opened my mouth. I just blurted

out the whole French girlfriend bit,

and I guess I can understand why she was

upset because she helped me, took me to

the pet store, and all I did was complain

about it. I had to pay for everything, by

the way. We didn't split it 50/50. I had

to pay for the whole thing. Well, I guess

she set up the tank. She set everything

up, so that's good.

I don't really know how to set up a fish

tank. And now I kind of regret getting

the fish because I don't think it was

worth the money. I don't think it was

worth $90 just to get a few fish.

You can't even touch them. You can't play

with them. They just swim around. The only

fun thing about having the fish is giving

them fish food now and then, watching them

swim and eat it. And they just poop the

whole time. And now

I have to clean out— I have to clean out

the fish tank every week. My wife said I

have to do that. I don't even know how to

clean it out. What do I do? Do I just take

the fish out first, put them in a glass or

something, and then tip out all the water?

That's so heavy, I can't lift this by

myself. Or I could get— maybe

there's a bucket in here.

No, there's no bucket.

Maybe I just get a glass or a cup, or I

could use this container thing here. And

just scoop out the water, tip it down the

sink one by one. That's going to take

forever. How many scoops of water would it

take to scoop all this out? And then I

have to fill it all back in again. And

then I don't even know if that's going to

clean it properly because all of their

poop drops into the gravel and then

kind of gets lodged in between the bits of

gravel. I would have to rinse out the

gravel Won't I? I can't just leave all

that shit lying in the gravel. That'd be

gross. Then I have to take out the plants,

I have to take out all the stones, I have

to take out the filter, rinse all the

gravel in the shower, put it back, and

then fill it up with water again. And I

have to do that every week for the rest of

their lives. And apparently they live for

about 5 to 10 years. If you're doing it

properly. And then

I have to buy this food as well. This

costs ¥420, that's $4 for food,

and it only lasts about— I think it lasts

about 2 weeks, so that's about $8 a month

just for food.

Bit of a backfire on that plan. I kind of

regret it, it was a stupid idea. I have no

idea why I thought that would get views.

I'd probably get more views just by

staring at the wall. At least that way I

wouldn't have to spend any money getting

food for fish and buying all this

equipment.

People are asking why didn't I get a cat

or a dog. I would like a cat, but my wife

won't let me get one because she says

we're not allowed pets here. And they'll

scratch the walls and then ruin the place.

I don't know what she's talking about.

I've never seen a cat scratch a wall. My

cats at home, they used to scratch the

sofa, the furniture. And I don't see how

the manager of this building would even

find out we have a cat. How would they

find out? They're not going to bust in

here and check the place, and it's not

like cats bark all day long. And even if

it did, even if it did meow all day long,

how would anyone know that the cat meowing

is coming from this apartment? And I'm

here every day, all day anyway, so I could

look after the cat. I would keep the cat

occupied by playing with it. It's not like

the cat's gonna go crazy from being all

alone. But then I feel kind of, I feel

kind of sad for the cat if we got one

because we wouldn't be able to let it

outside. If we let it outside, how would

it get back in? You need a key to get

through the entrance, and then there's all

these doors where you have to open— you

open these doors to get up the stairs.

The cat wouldn't be able to get in. How?

I don't understand how that would work.

So the cat would have to live its entire

life trapped in this tiny apartment.

And I feel kind of sad

forcing a cat to live that kind of life

because I come from England. We have a

massive garden. We've had a total of 4

cats in total in the past, and we always

let the cats run around outside and they

do hunting, they climb, and they're just

so free and they love going outside. And I

just couldn't imagine having a cat and not

letting it go outside. What would it do?

It would just wander up and down like I'm

doing now with nothing to do.

Probably just lie on the bed. There'd be

cat fur everywhere.

I would really like to have a cat. I think

it would cure my boredom quite a lot.

Maybe, maybe it's not really that weird.

To keep a cat inside for all of its life.

Maybe it's pretty normal in Japan. If it

was a dog, you could put it on a leash and

take it for walks, but I don't really know

if you could take a cat outside on a leash

for a walk. And the cat would be very

expensive as well. I guess cat food's a

lot more expensive than fish food. Plus

you need to get vaccinations, and if it

gets ill, take it to the vet. Pets are

fun. I like animals. I like cats and dogs,

but they, they cost a lot of money. It's a

lot of hard work, especially if they

get sick. My cat Mimo at home, she's not

really having a good time because the

neighbors, they bought new cats, and I

think they're male. 2 new cats. They keep

coming over to our garden, roaming around,

and they chase Mimo. And they attack her.

She has these pretty bad-looking bite

marks on the back of her legs. My mum had

to take her to the vets and had to pay

about £200 to get stitches.

So now Mimo can't go outside because she's

scared that she'll get attacked again.

I'm not really sure what my mum could do

about that. How do you stop neighbours'

cats from coming into your garden and

attacking your own cats? Even if the whole

garden was fenced off, cats can still just

climb up the fence. My mum can't fence off

the entire garden. Well, I guess she

could, but it's a lot of work. I guess she

could try and chase off the cats every

time she sees them, but that's not really

going to prevent them from coming back

unless something really bad happens where

they get traumatized into being too scared

to come back. But then that's, you know,

that's kind of like animal cruelty.

Anyway, that was what the stupid argument

was about. It was a stupid fish. I just

got kind of annoyed because I had this— I

had this plan in my mind where I would

just go into a dingy little shop run by an

old Japanese guy, spend a couple dollars

on some fish, maybe get a bowl, and then

maybe release the fish into a stream the

next day after I made the video. So in

total, I would have only spent maybe $10

at most. But the complete opposite

happened, and I ended up spending over

$100. Now I'm stuck with the fish for

years and years and years. I have to buy

fish food and look after them, clean out

the tank. And the worst thing is,

the video didn't even do well.

Barely scratched 10K views. I barely made

anything off it, just $30.

So note to self, do not

get fish for YouTube views.