Why my hair used to look stupid

Yeah, that was, that was me 10 years ago

with that fabulous looking hair. I can't

believe I used to have a hairstyle that

ridiculous. So why did I have such a

ridiculous looking hairstyle back then?

Well, the main reason was 10 years ago

when I was about 18 or 19, I was a huge

weeb, weeaboo. You know, the kind of

person who's obsessed with everything

Japan and related to Japan and anime.

And I used to be that person. I used to be

really into anime. I used to be obsessed

with everything Japan and Japanese. I used

to be obsessed with learning the language,

obsessed with learning about the country

and the culture and the people. And I

feel kind of embarrassed that I used to be

like that. And I used to be really into

learning Japanese, and I used to think I

was so special, so unique because I knew

how to speak Japanese and I was learning

Japanese. I would set all of my electronic

devices to Japanese. As soon as I, I got a

new electronic device, like a new computer

or a new phone, I'd go straight into the

settings, set it to Japanese because it

made me feel cool. I thought I looked

really cool using my devices in this in

this strange, mysterious Japanese

language. I didn't want to do anything in

English. I refused to watch English shows.

I refused to listen to English music. I

refused to watch English movies.

I wanted to do everything in Japanese. I

only watched Japanese TV on the internet.

I only watched Japanese movies or TV

shows. I only listened to Japanese bands.

I only talked to Japanese people on the

internet. I had this weird obsession with

becoming friends with Japanese people so I

could add them onto Facebook and then have

conversations on Facebook in Japanese.

And I thought I looked really cool

speaking to people in Japanese on Facebook

and writing comments in Japanese. And I

missed out on so many good TV shows and

movies that I never watched until recently

or a few years ago just because I kind of

cut English. I tried my best to cut

English out of my life and replace it with

Japanese. I used to spend over an hour

doing my hair every single morning so it

looked like how it looked in that picture

in the beginning. I would wake up 6 AM

before I had to go to work doing my

kitchen job. I'd wash it,

hair dry it, blow dry it with the hair

dryer. And then straighten it with hair

straighteners and then hairspray it so it

stayed in place, so it stayed all spiky.

And I used to get really stressed out

going outside when it was windy because

the wind would mess it all up and blow it

all out of shape. And I used to get so

stressed out about the wind, I would have

dreams where I would have a magical

ability where I would have like a force

field around my head so the wind couldn't

blow my hair. Every morning before I went

to work, I'd be praying, please, please

don't be windy. Please, anything but wind.

And the main reason why I had that kind of

hairstyle was because I saw it in anime,

and I saw it in Japanese visual kei bands

where they had that kind of straight spiky

hair. And I really wanted it to look like,

like those anime characters, like in Death

Note or in Naruto or those visual kei

bands, and I used to think I looked so

cool with that hairstyle. I used to walk

to work and then get to work, walk into my

workplace with my hair all long and spiky

and straight and a little bit dyed. I used

to dye it as well, just light brown here

and there, and I thought I looked— I

thought I looked freaking amazing. I

thought I looked so cool. But now I think

about it and I look back at the pictures,

I must have looked like a complete idiot.

I used to rush back home after work

finished, then make myself a big bowl of

ramen, sit at my desk which was covered in

anime figurines. I had a little collection

of manga comic books starting to build up

underneath my desk on the shelf, and I

would just sit there watching Naruto. Or

some other anime, eating my big bowl of

ramen with my chopsticks, thinking that I

was, I was really cool and unique. And I

just don't know why I was like that. I was

so obsessed with Japan and trying to be

Japanese, trying to look Japanese. It's

just weird now I think about it. It's kind

of strange, isn't it? I mean, it's a good

thing to show an interest in other

countries and their cultures and to learn

their languages. But when you take it that

far where you get to this point where

you're completely obsessed with it and you

actually want to become Japanese,

it's— it gets kind of ridiculous. There

was just something so appealing about how

anime and Japanese TV portrayed Japan.

It just looked like such a nice country.

To live in and to be part of, and I

wanted to go there. I wanted to become one

of them. I used to watch anime every

single day, all day long. When I wasn't at

work, I was at home watching anime,

drawing anime whilst watching it,

fantasizing about it, obsessing over it,

thinking about it. That's all I could

think about. It was

like a disease, like an illness, like an

addiction. For such a long time, all I

would do was fantasize about

living in Japan, about working in Japan,

having Japanese friends, having a Japanese

lover, becoming like a Japanese

person, leaving my life in England behind,

leaving the English language behind.

Basically completely converting into

a Japanese person. That was my dream. My

dream was to live out some kind of

lifestyle that I've seen on, on anime or

Japanese drama. And I was completely

obsessed with it for years and years.

That was like my life goal. That was all I

wanted, to be able to live here. And now

I'm living here, 10 years later,

since all of this Japan stuff began,

since I started obsessing over Japan.

My dream finally came true,

and it's

alright, I guess. It's not bad. I'm not

really into anime anymore. I don't really

enjoy speaking Japanese anymore. I don't

really care about being Japanese. I know

I'm not Japanese, I never will be.

I just wanted to make a video to tell

you what I used to be like. I used to be

weird. If you think I'm weird now, you

should have seen me 10 years ago. At least

now I'm not, not a weeaboo. At least now I

don't have this weird fantasy of becoming

a Japanese person.

I'm not trying to bash anime or make fun

of people who like anime. If you like

anime, that's, that's great. Glad you

enjoy it. I'm mainly making fun of myself

because after all these years, I finally

realized how stupid I was, how stupid

I looked.

Hahaha! Ahahaha!

Ahahaha! I got my Amazon,

I got my Amazon, I got my Amazon.

It's the same man who always comes and he

looks kind of fat and I always say thank

you to him. USB cable. Charges using USB,

no batteries. Very convenient.

Give it to me. Give it.

Sorry. See, Technologic.

It's not working. Oh.

Oh. Can you see?

Oh wow, look, it's over there! Can you see

it? Look,

it goes all the way to the door.

I'm so happy with this. I'm going to go

outside and blind things. What if I shoot

it at the mirror? Does it reflect?

Wow, it reflects off the mirror!

Look,

I'm shooting at the mirror and it's over

there. Can you see it? It's behind me.

It's there, but I'm pointing it in front

This is so cool. Why have I never bought a

laser pen before?

Should I point it into the camera?

Oh, oh, I'm gonna break my laptop camera.

This is so fun.

Oh, it burns! I don't know, actually,

it might just be my imagination. Does it

burn? Oh, I think it burns.

No, it doesn't.