How I CHEATED in Love Hotels in Japan and got away with it 😏

If you're interested in Japan, you may

have heard about something called a love

hotel. And since we don't have these love

hotels in Europe or the West, you may be

wondering what happens in these love

hotels. And that's what we will be finding

out today. You might think that love is

happening in these hotels, but The truth

is the complete opposite of love is

happening in these hotels. Love stands for

something pure, innocent, magical, and

beautiful, but what happens in these

hotels could not be any further from those

adjectives. And to tell us about his

experiences and stories inside of love

hotels, we have a very special guest here

today, my dear friend Bilbo. At first, he

didn't really want to share his stories

because they're kind of personal and

private, but I managed to twist his arm a

little bit and I convinced him to join us

today. Say hello, Bilbo. Hello.

Unfortunately, Bilbo had a bit of an

accident and has injured his jaw, so he

has difficulties speaking as of now. So

I'll be telling the story for him.

It was a cold winter's night and it was

softly raining down from the sky. A chill

lingered in the air like cheese on bread.

Bilbo had a pretty big argument with his

girlfriend the previous night and she

kicked him out, so he needed to find a

place to stay. The thing is with Bilbo is

he finds it difficult to sleep by himself.

He really needs something warm, some kind

of warm body laying beside him.

If he's to have a good night's sleep. He

shivered at the idea of having to sleep

alone tonight, all by himself, and a tear

started to form in his eyeball. Bilbo took

out his phone and had a look at his

friends list to see who was online that

night. Hmm, I could call her,

but I don't know, too fat,

too old. No, she's too smelly. Bilbo was

quickly reaching the end of his friends

list. Whatever shall he do? So he decided

that he had no choice but to use his

special ability. Most ordinary people

would call it Tinder, but Bilbo used to

like to call it his special fishing rod in

times of need. No matter how stormy the

seas, there was usually always something

tasty to be plucked out of the waters.

And boy, oh boy, Bilbo was about to catch

exactly what he wanted. First of all,

he set his maximum search distance to 500

miles, and then he set the age range

to 20 to 45. With these

search parameters in place, he started

swiping right, and within 30 minutes

he managed to match. Very special lady.

She told him she was 36 and she had

3 very young children, and she was feeling

lonely tonight. Unfortunately, she was

about 6 hours away by train, but this

wouldn't stop Bilbo. He still wanted to

see her. He told her that he would be

willing to travel if she would want to

meet up tonight, and she said, Okay.

After 6 long hours on the train, he

finally arrived at this small, sleepy,

quiet Japanese town. She was waiting

for him at the train station. She looked

quite youthful and pretty despite her age.

Bilbo wasn't quite sure what to do now.

He was surprised that she even showed up.

He didn't have any place to go and and he

didn't have any hotel booked. So he said

to her, shall we go to a love hotel?

Now this was Bilbo's first time going to a

love hotel, so he wasn't quite sure what

to expect. She said yes, and then Bilbo

opened his Google Maps to find the closest

love hotel. Luckily, there were lots very

nearby to the station. How convenient. He

chose the cheapest one and said to her,

let's go, I found one, it's really cheap.

After walking for about 10 minutes, they

arrived at the love hotel. It was a

strange-looking building, strange design

with funny signs on the outside. It didn't

really look like a hotel, it looked more

like some kind of haunted house attraction

at a theme park. But it was getting late

and cold, and it was starting to rain even

harder. When they entered the love hotel,

there was a big display on the wall,

different rooms, and there were buttons.

Most of the rooms were occupied, so he had

to find one that was vacant, and then he

pressed a button and a tiny piece of paper

was ejected from the wall. Bilbo and his

new lady friend made their way up to the

3rd floor and found their room for the

night. It was a strange room, not like any

hotel room Bilbo had seen before. The

inside of the room kind of looked like it

was decorated by an 80-year-old woman.

There was a strange cabinet full of little

doors, and behind each door There was a

strange-looking object, things that Bilbo

had never seen before. He sat down on the

bed next to his new lady friend. He didn't

even remember what her name was, but she

had a very strong smell of cigarettes.

She had shoulder-length straight black

hair, and when she smiled, her eyes turned

into upside-down bananas. In a way, her

face kind of reminded Bilbo of his

ex-Japanese girlfriend who also gave him

chlamydia. They didn't really say much to

each other. It was too awkward, and the

tension in the room was so thick you could

slice it with butter. Bilbo started to

undress her and pushed her down onto the

bed, and then he The

whole thing was over in only 15 minutes.

They lay next to each other, gasping for

air. Bilbo had spread his butter all over

her multigrain bread loaf. There were

breadcrumbs all over the sheets. It was a

disgusting mess, but Bilbo was satisfied

that night, and he slept well.

He slept very well. He woke up the next

morning and asked her if he could see her

again the next night, but she said no.

She said she was not impressed with

Bilbo's butter-spreading abilities, and

she told him to practice more by himself.

She said she had plans to see someone else

the next night. As you can imagine, Bilbo

was pretty disappointed. He said okay and

bid her farewell. They would never meet

ever again. Bilbo made his way home, a

long 6-hour train journey. He had a lot

of time to think to himself. He apologized

to his girlfriend and made things right

and headed straight back home into her

loving arms. She would never find out what

happened that night at the love hotel.