why I don't regret getting Divorced [5tEFWj2C3FE]

So it's been about 3 years since I got

divorced, and I was thinking about the

whole situation and whether I regret

getting divorced and losing my visa to

live in Japan. And the short answer is not

really. Actually, it really pisses me off

when people say stuff like, Daniel really

messed up losing his marriage and his visa

in Japan. Chihiro was so out of his

league. I don't know what world you must

be living in to think that Chihiro was out

of my league. She didn't have anything

that is desirable as a man. So for

example, she didn't have wealth, she

didn't have youth, she didn't even have a

nice personality, and she was super toxic

and cheated on me several times. And you

think that she was out of my league and I

couldn't get better? I don't think there's

any sane man who actually wants to be

married or in a relationship with a woman

who is 8 years older than they are,

unless the woman is insanely hot, which

Chihiro wasn't, or she's really rich and

basically is like a sugar mama, which she

wasn't that either. So 99% of men in

this world want to have a girlfriend or a

partner who's younger than they are, or at

least just a few years older or younger.

Around the same age is ideal. The entire

relationship was just so toxic where we'd

be constantly fighting all the time over

basically almost everything that I would

say on Discord or on livestreams or in

videos. She would get upset about even

though I was just joking or messing

around, not really being serious. And I

told her to stop spying on me and stop

trying to snoop and try and find out

everything I'm trying to say, but she

wouldn't wouldn't listen, and she would

constantly spy on me when I'm just doing

like man locker room kind of silly talk

with my Discord members. And then she

would find out and then get upset and come

home, and then we'd have a big argument.

And this happened day after day after day.

Sometimes it wouldn't happen for a few

days, but it used to happen like once or

twice every week. Actually, the moment I

lost respect for her completely was when I

found out she was cheating on me and

messaging one of her ex-friends with

benefits, the Australian guy, behind my

back. As if I wouldn't find out about it.

And she was being like very flirty with

him. And then when I confronted her about

it, she wouldn't even admit it. Sometimes

I just think to myself, if I had never

gotten divorced, that lifestyle of just

fighting all the time, her coming back

from work and then arguing with me, that

lifestyle would have just carried on and

kept going on and on until I wouldn't be

able to take it anymore and I would have

just mentally cracked. So I feel like it

was definitely in my best interests,

obviously for her best interests as well,

but I don't really care about that. For my

best interests, It was definitely the wise

decision to get divorced and leave her.

If anything, I think she's the one who

messed up by kicking me out and starting

the whole divorce procedure because she's

now what, 42, 43? I really don't think she

would be able to get a new boyfriend who

is better looking than me. I'm not trying

to brag or anything, but if you're 42,

the only kind of guy you're gonna be able

to get is either a guy your age, so like a

45-year-old man who's probably gonna be

fat with a big belly belly, and he's

pretty balding, and he pretty looks pretty

old, and he might even be a divorcee, and

he might even have some kids from the

previous marriage. So her options would be

like a 45-year-old man around her age

who's going to have his own problems.

Because even she said this herself— I'm

basically quoting her at this point— if a

man is single and he's like 45 or 50,

then he probably has problems. Because if

he didn't have problems, then he would

already be married with the kids and a

family. She always used to say that she

would never want to date like a fat

old-looking man who's nearly 50 or mid-40s

because, well, he's just very unattractive

and he's gonna have his own problems like

past baggage. So her only options would be

to get a younger guy. And I don't really

see why a younger guy who's like late 20s

or early 30s would wanna date someone

who's mid-40s unless, like I said before,

she's either really hot or very rich.

Now I dated someone who's in their mid-30s

when I was 20. But I would not really want

to date someone who's in their mid-40s

when I'm in my 30s or early 30s. If I'm

late 30s, then maybe an early 40 woman

would be fine. I guess maybe she could get

like a 30-year-old foreigner gaijin who

really wants to live in Japan, and maybe

he's kind of weird and awkward, can't

really get a girlfriend in his own

country, and I guess she could be quite

appealing for a guy like that. So I just

really don't see a guy who's better

looking than me going for someone like

Chihiro, and I know that might sound

harsh, but I'm just saying that I don't

think she's out of my league. I think I

was way out of her league. As for losing

my visa in Japan and not being able to

live in Japan anymore, okay, yeah, living

in Japan was a massive goal of mine when I

was a teenager and in my 20s. I don't

really care about living in Japan anymore.

I've been to Japan like 15 times. I've

lived in Japan for at most 2 years in one

time. And after being to Japan so many

times and being there for such a long

time, the magic of being in Japan and

living there has kind of worn off, and I

don't really care anymore. Everything you

can find in Japan, you can find in

Thailand. Maid cafes, karaoke, Japanese

food, massive luxurious shopping centers,

and the vibrant futuristic-looking

cityscape can all be found in Bangkok.

You don't need to be in Japan. Japan is

not the only modern kind of Asian country

in Asia. Obviously, I don't watch anime

anymore. I don't really fantasize about

Japanese girls anymore, and I feel like my

level of Japanese fluency and ability is

high enough, or got to a level where it's

high enough, where I feel kind of

satisfied. I feel like I could comfortably

strike up a conversation with a Japanese

person if I wanted to, which I don't. For

example, there were actually 2 Japanese

people in the lift going up to my school,

and I think they actually go to my school.

And yeah, I could have said konnichiwa to

them and asked them a few things, but I

just really didn't care. I didn't really

feel interested I felt like it was kind of

interesting to hear Japanese again so

close to me, and I could understand

basically every single word, which made me

feel pretty good inside. Sometimes I think

back when I was a teenager obsessed with

anime, and I remember how excited I used

to feel whenever I could hear Japanese

being spoken in real time near me in the

real world, and I could actually see

Japanese people. I used to get so excited

just over people from a country. It was so

weird now I think back on it. When I went

back to Japan back in May, a couple months

ago, I had the opportunity to stay in

Japan and leave behind my life in

Thailand. And I did seriously do a lot of

thinking about if I actually want to stay

in Japan and try and rebuild the life I

once had before. And obviously I decided

to leave Japan and come back to Thailand

because I just didn't really see how I

would feel happy being in Japan still and

trying to rebuild a life there. I've kind

of gone over the whole, oh, I want to live

in Japan so much. I don't really care

about that. I'm more interested in trying

out something new instead of just trying

to do the same things that I always used

to do when I was younger. It just feels

like going round and round in a circle and

not really getting anywhere and just going

back to what I used to be doing instead of

moving forwards with something new. So in

conclusion, no, I don't really regret

getting divorced. I'm not sad that I no

longer have a 42-year-old wife anymore. I

don't really care about living in Japan

anymore. I'm quite happy here in Thailand.

And I'm ready to move on with my life.

And I want to show you my new fish. I got

this fish at the market a couple days ago

when I did a livestream, and it's a— it's

a betta fish. Haven't given him a name.

And I got this tank. I think the tank is

okay. Maybe it's a little bit small. I

might get a bigger tank later, but I think

it's fine for now. I got this plastic

plant and I got this water filter.

This time I decided not to put any gravel

at the bottom like I had before because it

was very hard to keep it clean. All of the

poop and stuff would get stuck in between

the gravel and I had to get a pump, like a

vacuum suction pump, to clean it all.

This time I want to keep it simple, just

have nothing on the bottom so I can easily

sweep up any stuff that collects on the

bottom. I don't know what this stuff is.

Little white specks seems to be coming

from somewhere. I use a sponge. I cut out

this little bit of sponge and I put it on

the end of a chopstick and I just use it

to scoop stuff up and I get the poop and I

squish it into the sponge and then slide

it up the glass to take it out of the

tank. That way I don't need to mess around

with that silly vacuum siphon pump thing.

I don't think I really need it. And I only

got one fish because these fish are very

territorial and And they don't like being

with other fish. They actually start

fighting to the death if you put it with

another fish. And these fish are

interesting because— I'm not sure if it's

going to do it now— sometimes it goes to

the surface to breathe. These fish have

like a, like a special breathing organ.

It's like a lung, but it's not a lung. It

allows them to take a gulp of air and

actually breathe from the gulp of air.

And I Googled it, it said you can actually

take this fish out of water and if you

keep its body moist, it would stay alive

for at least a few hours. So it can

actually breathe air from the surface of

the, of the water, which means they are

much more resilient if the tank is not in

great condition. They're actually much

more resilient to surviving. Now I am

trying my best to keep the tank in the

best condition, but as some of you may

know from my previous fish tank, despite

my best efforts trying to keep the tank in

good condition, I lost a lot of fish.

Previously I had about 10 neon tetra and

10 Japanese rice fish, medaka, and they

kept dying. I don't know why they kept

dying. I made sure to clean the tank and

change the water and condition the water,

but they seemed to be very fragile and

weak fish and they got sick. The orange

Japanese fish, they kept getting sick and

then their spines got all bent and then

they couldn't swim anymore and then they

would just die. So that wasn't great, but

I think these betta fish are stronger,

and I'm gonna try harder to keep this one