how i wasted my life

Uh, testing.

Would you like a sausage?

No, it's mine.

Hungry.

They don't have sausages like this in

Japan, do they?

Look at that,

thick.

I don't know why in Japan They don't have

proper pork sausage in Japan.

If you want a sausage, all you can get are

those silly wiener things or bratwursts,

but it's not really like a proper

bratwurst.

You never get a sausage like this in

Japan.

Never.

And this is not a fancy sausage, it's like

bog standard cheap thing from Tesco.

Never.

Things Japan can't do well: sandwiches,

sausages, bacon, ham, cheese.

So if you love those things, you're not

going to be happy in Japan.

And bread.

They suck at making Western food, don't

they?

I think they should just stop.

If you're not gonna do it properly, just

don't do it.

When I lived in Japan, you couldn't get

any of this stuff.

Couldn't even get a proper pork sausage.

Oh God, so good.

Most basic sausage in all of Tesco,

and it's like the best thing ever.

One time I got Camembert in Japan, and I

didn't read the packaging properly, and it

was just the fake rubbish cheese with 3%

Camembert.

It tastes horrible.

It's literally like Babybel.

I hate Babybel.

Remember those as a kid?

You gotta peel the wax off and then the

cheese is so—

such a boring flavor and texture.

Oh, I fell asleep.

The sun finally came out and I was in the

conservatory and I just fell asleep on the

beanbag.

Woke up an hour later, I was like, whoa,

finally the rain stopped.

What a week.

It's like I haven't seen the sun in a

week.

It's just been grey skies and wind and

rain.

It's made me feel a bit miserable, to be

honest.

I just felt really bored.

And then I fell asleep.

Hell.

Okay, what we doing?

Nothing.

Okay, good to sleep.

Oh, I forgot my Amazon thing's supposed to

come today, 5 to 7 PM.

What time is it now?

Where's my phone?

My 5 kgs, you're gonna see me pump iron.

Maybe it came when I was sleeping.

Oh no, 5:45 to 7:45.

They come so late here.

Every time I get Amazon, it always comes

really late.

Yeah, it's funny because you can't get all

the things I just said.

You can't get in Japan, like sausages and

stuff, but you can get better sushi in

England than you can get in Japan.

You can get soba and ramen and all that

stuff in England.

The only thing you can't get in England is

yakiniku.

I can't find it.

We got better sushi in England because we

got avocado salmon rolls.

They don't have that in Japan.

And in Japan, the sushi is always room

temperature.

Weird.

I want my sushi refrigerated.

Actually, best sushi I ever had was in

Germany with Mila.

I put it on my Instagram.

It was so damn good.

I got a picture on my Instagram.

It was the best sushi I ever had.

It was like tuna, salmon, avocado.

For some reason in Japan they hate putting

avocado on sushi.

They probably think it's blasphemous.

Let's see.

The only thing from Japan I miss are the

thin strips of meat like udon and

yakiniku.

That's it, really.

Oh God.

Ever since I made that video last night, I

got another guy DM me with screenshots of

him, like, flirting with Chihiro on her

Instagram.

So it's, it's not even like guys finding

her on Tinder now.

Now it would make sense why she's got the

Instagram.

Forever, for a long time, I was like, why

does she have the Instagram posting stuff

to my viewers?

She's screwing my viewers.

I don't know how many of my viewers she's

been messaging,

but we know she's messaged at least 2 now.

Check on Discord.

What?

Well, I've got nothing on Discord.

Yeah, so this other guy messages me.

Um, he sends me screenshots and he was

messaging her on Instagram and then she's

like, oh, nice body.

Do you work out?

When are you coming to Japan?

Smiley face.

God, she's such an slut.

She's basically just like flirting with

all my viewers now.

I don't know when that was.

I asked the guy when it was.

I don't think he said when.

Oh, he messaged me now.

What is that now?

Yeah, you could literally just DM to her

on Instagram and like try and hook up.

She likes young white guys apparently.

Crazy.

I thought, you know, she moved on.

Isn't she with a guy now?

I thought she's with a guy.

Well, are you the guy in my DMs right now?

Flaco.

You're Mexican.

I had this impression she only likes white

guys.

What does Chosen look like?

Because he's the guy I talked about in the

video.

Well, the messages are now

But how are they now?

Isn't it like midnight in Japan now?

What's she doing at midnight chatting to

my viewers?

Time in Tokyo is 2 AM.

When were these replies?

They're not— they surely can't be now.

She's— no way she's up at 2:40 AM.

Is she single again then?

Maybe she's single again.

We should do like boyfriend application

video for Chihiro and I'll link her

Instagram.

Bet she'll like that.

Why doesn't she just use Tinder?

I don't get it.

Like, why is she using Instagram

with my viewers as a dating pool when she

could easily go on Tinder?

I really don't get it.

What's her Instagram?

chi.chi0304.

She said, you were born in California.

Are you learning Japanese?

We can talk English.

How old are you?

You look so young.

Oh, so young.

Smiley face.

She's such a pedo.

She's going to be like 40-something old

woman banging 20-year-olds.

Literal gaijin hunter.

Crazy.

I thought she would like get a nice late

30s Japanese guy boyfriend.

She's just degen as the rest of us.

I can't believe she's like this.

I honestly thought she just moved on and

then got a normal life, and then she's

literally DMing my viewers on Instagram

trying to hook up.

It's insane.

You think you know someone,

you really don't know anyone, do you?

Everyone's fake.

You just— oh my God, whenever you think

you know one, you just— you don't know

them at all.

I honestly thought she just moved on, got

a normal life, and she was like putting

all this behind her.

Only thing she's putting behind her is my

viewers' 12-inch cock.

Why don't I just go hook up with

Australian guy again?

Yeah, annoying thing is she's like

flirting with all my viewers and then she

didn't want to hook up with me when I was

in Japan last year.

Yeah, that does kind of piss me off.

What, am I not cute anymore?

I'm too old now?

She only dates 20-year-olds apparently.

That's what grinds my gears.

She called the police on me.

And she's obviously wanting some action,

and I was right there, just 10 minutes

down the street.

She thinks she can flirt with my viewers

and get away with it without me making a

big fuss.

Oh, she hasn't learned a thing, has she?

She has not learned a thing.

I'm gonna make a video and blow the whole

thing up, and I'm gonna link her

Instagram.

Go on, guys, all you go have a shot.

Bang my ex-wife, bang my ex-wife

challenge.

I'll give you $100 if you can provide the

receipts,

put it in the video.

The @Sushi's viewers— well, how many

followers does she have now?

I don't know, I haven't— I mean, I'm

banned from her Instagram, she blocked me.

But last time I checked,

it was the Instagram she made before she

got with her sushi, so all the followers

would have been my followers.

So I don't know how many more followers

she's gained since meeting at sushi.

Dan, you must be already bored.

Yeah, I am

digging up old drama now.

Now I'm jobless, what do I do all day?

Just sit in the conservatory and fall

asleep, to be honest.

Might have a wank, make some food, lift my

dumbbells.

No, I'm not playing video games.

I can't be bothered.

They just feel so pointless.

I'd rather just fall asleep, to be honest.

It's a waste of time.

It's just annoying.

You die,

you don't get anything in the real world

out of it.

Oh, I'm bothered with gaming, really.

Trading is boring as well.

Market just does nothing.

And then when it does do something, you

lose money.

I'm so bored of day trading.

I was in a trade all day and I made £2.

So it finally went up and I took profit.

It's so boring.

Why can't I just enter a trade and it

works in 10 minutes?

It took

5 hours to make £2.

Well, do you mind that I, um, leak the

DMs?

Because she'll find out, won't she?

And then she might block you.

I don't know, I guess— I don't know, do

you think I've said too much already?

Because I don't want to ruin your chances.

I mean, it would be pretty funny if you

banged her, to be honest.

I don't know if—

hmm, I don't know if I'll be mad or turned

on.

I think at this point I wouldn't be mad,

although I'm kind of mad she'll bang my

viewers but she won't bang me.

That's what I'm mad about.

Like, why can't you bang me?

What's wrong with me?

I made her cum every time when we were

married.

It's just like a pride thing, like, oh, he

hurt me, so I would never bang him again.

The dick is literally a dick.

Who cares?

At least you know I'm not gonna like

murder you or something.

So unfair.

Do you think she banged Australian guys

since we got divorced?

Because I don't see why not.

It's not like Australian guy ever did

anything to upset her,

and she was banging him when he didn't

love her anyway before anyway.

So it's not like him having to love her

was a requirement.

So unfair.

Well, I don't even get one little cheeky

bang.

I went all the way to see her as well.

And she moved houses to get away from me.

Oh, what if I catfish her?

What if I pretend I'm like a white guy and

then arrange a meetup and I show up and

it's like, hey, it's me, motherfucker.

That'd be so funny.

And then I film it.

What do you think she would do?

She thinks she'll just run away.

She would just walk off, wouldn't she,

without saying anything?

Catfishing my ex-wife.

Oh my God, that'd be so funny.

She's like 50.

Yeah, and she's sexting my 20-year-old

viewers

thinking I won't know about it.

Oh my God, is that my Amazon?

Are you all right there?

Get a quick picture if that's all right.

Yeah.

Top of the job.

Spin heavy, I'll patch it up.

All right, nice one.

Cheers.

It's my 4 5 kg plates.

20 kg in that box.

Cost me £27.

Annoying, because I only need 2, but I

couldn't find anyone that sold only 2, so

I had to buy 4.

The only one that had only 2, um, they

said I gotta wait a month for delivery.

I thought, no thanks, I'll just get the 4.

Already struggling.

Yeah, it was 20 kg in there.

I'm not lifting 20 kg.

I'm trying, I'm trying to do 15 kg with

one arm, not 20.

I mean, 20 kg with 2 arms is 10 kg per

arm, so I mean, it's not heavy, it's just,

um, you know, awkward to hold.

Heard the delivery guy struggle with it.

Yeah, he just said it was a bit heavy.

I mean, if I had to deliver a parcel and

it was 20 kg, I'd be pissed.

Honestly, I hated doing Evri, and then you

got some, like, a big bag of compost or

something heavy.

It was annoying.

Slows you down.

You've also got to use 2 hands to carry

it, so you can't like scan, do the

scanning and place it down all at the same

time.

You gotta put it down, put the phone in

your pocket,

pick it up and put it down, get the phone

back out, unlock it.

No, I'm pretty sure that was an Amazon

delivery guy, not Every.

I guess I can tell if I look at the label.

No, it's Amazon.

It's got the Amazon label.

I feel sad now when I see those labels.

I remember scanning those Amazon labels

for 3 months, and now I feel sad.

I see every label because it's got like

the round number and I recognize it.

Never again am I doing delivery work.

No, thank you.

Is my OF worth it?

Well, I would say so.

Definitely explicit enough.

I just posted something new today.

My bum looks so good.

My bum, when I've removed the hair and

like oiled it up a bit, looks so fuckable.

I would fuck it myself.

I dare any straight guy to look at my

oiled up hairless buttocks and not get

hard.

Double dare you.

Any word from Chibora after the new video?

No, I don't know, because she was— she

probably doesn't even know that I can't

get into my Line.

So even if she messaged me on Line, I

wouldn't even know.

I mean, what's she going to do now?

Usually she would go crying to my mum

about it and then my mum would complain.

But now I've blocked my mum.

I cut ties.

There's literally nothing Chira can do.

She can't call the police.

Not in Japan.

What are you going to do about it?

I'm not banned from Line.

I just don't remember my password.

And the way to reset the password requires

a phone number that I don't have anymore.

I think it was my Japanese phone number.

So yeah, I can't reset the password and I

don't remember the password, which is

silly.

So it's another way Sunny screwed me over.

I lost all my sex videos of Chihiro too,

so now I can't even wank over her.

So leaving it to you guys, get me some

Footage.

No, that's pretty illegal.

Don't do that.

How did day trading go today?

Not good.

I went long today

and I lost £8.

I got stopped out 5 times.

And then I finally, uh, had a successful

long and I took £2 profit.

So net loss £6.

The day I go long, that is the day the

market won't go up.

Typical, isn't it?

Traveling Trader tried going long too and

he got stopped out, lost $300 per

contract.

He has not been doing well recently.

Yesterday he went short and he got stopped

out.

I'm not renewing my Discord membership

next month.

They just lose me money.

It just makes you realize he doesn't know

what's going to happen either.

Like, no one knows what's going to happen.

Even these billion-dollar hedge fund

people have no idea what's going to

happen.

Everyone's just guessing, aren't they?

It's not like, um, big money is really

smart or anything.

They've just got more money.

They make massive cock-ups as well.

Yeah, I'm just not really finding it

useful.

And then I jump in with a, a play that

he's doing and I just lose money.

Cuz I went short yesterday cuz he was

saying, oh, I was short, and then it went

up all day long.

Annoying.

I want my money back.

£175.

And I've lost hundreds from shorting the

S&P 500 because he said

that it's going to go down to this level

and then it just ripped.

So I've lost nearly £400 following his

advice and also joining his Discord.

Not very happy.

Market could easily do all-time new high

before even going down again.

God, my hair's so nice today.

It's like nice and soft as well.

Yeah, I washed my hair today.

Looks pretty good.

Now I've learned a few things, but I don't

know if they're really gonna help that

much,

because I mean, they don't seem to help

him.

So right now I just, I feel like I don't

know what I'm doing.

Am I scared I'll have the same hairline as

my dad?

No, my dad had his hairline since he was

20-something.

You think my dad had hair like this at 36?

Oh, you must be joking.

My dad went bald from like age 22.

When he was about 20, he was losing his

hair.

Oh wow, thanks, Navi.

What's a Ron?

And you said you weren't gonna donate.

You lied.

Thanks for the ronds.

I don't even know what that is.

Nigerian rupees.

Yeah, well, according to my research, sons

inherit their mother's

dad's hair genetics.

The hair genetics come from the mother's

side.

And all my Malaysian uncles have hair.

They have quite good hair, actually.

I don't have a single bald Malaysian

uncle.

So unfortunately, if my sister has kids

and it's a boy, he's probably going to go

bald.

I would love to test that theory.

Don't date girls with

Bald dads.

It is sad when you got young guys and they

already start losing their hair.

I met this German guy back in 2010, he was

only like 20-something, very thin hair

already.

He's probably completely bald by now.

I need to thank my mum.

No, I need to thank my grandmother for

marrying a Malaysian man who wasn't bald,

I guess.

I hate my crooked teeth.

It's the one thing I hate about my face.

Do you think those retainer things work

where you wear them when you go to sleep?

Got

these 2 bottom teeth, they're crooked.

I don't want to get braces.

I'm not a teenager.

Every time I make a video and I watch it

back, the one thing I hate are those 2

crooked teeth.

And the way I speak, the bottom teeth are

more visible Because you notice people

like Chris Broad, they have like an upper

lip way of speaking.

Like,

I don't know, like they lift up the upper

lip when they speak a lot.

I don't do that for some reason.

Like, you rarely see my upper teeth when I

talk, but you see my bottom teeth a lot.

I very rarely do the snarl like, like

that.

But British people do it a lot.

Like Sunny did it too.

I don't know why British people are very

snarly when they talk.

They do like, yeah, like that kind of

irritating speech pattern.

I don't do that.

You watch Chris Broad and look at his

upper lip, you'll see he snarls a lot when

he speaks.

Very snarly.

I think I'm a bit of a lazy speaker.

I don't really move my lips a lot

unless I can help it.

£500 for a head shave?

Nah, more like 1,000.

I don't know, because I'd look so bad,

it might scare the girls off.

My hair's my best feature.

Although it would be funny if I did shave

it all off and girls find me more

attractive.

That would be ironic.

Yeah, but I know I don't leave the house,

but I stream and I make videos, so I've

got to be on camera.

I'm not wearing a wig.

I'd probably just wear a hat, maybe.

Is market tanking yet?

It didn't even tank last night.

I think it's waiting for Nvidia earnings.

My hair looks like a helmet cuz it's

thick,

so it wouldn't really matter the style

It doesn't matter what style it would be,

it's just because my hair's thick

and I don't have like a fade style,

although it's getting kind of long on the

side.

Oh my God,

oh my God, I didn't cut that bit.

Stupid scissors.

I've had these scissors for ages, they're

pretty good.

I like the little thing there at the

bottom.

I hate it when the back gets long, this

bit here, and then it starts looking like

a mullet.

I hate it when the sides get too long.

Where's my jumper?

It's too hot for a jumper.

I can't wear that anymore.

Someone said something funny on one of my

gaming videos.

He said, I'm not going to listen to a guy

who wears his carpet as a jumper, because

my gray jumper does look a bit like a

carpet.

I don't like fades.

I think to pull off a fade, you got to

look really macho.

I think it looked weird on me.

Yeah, one day my hairstyle will be

popular.

All the kids will be doing it.

If I had a kid, a son, I'd style his hair

to make it look just like mine,

like a little mini-me.

What if my son's bald?

Well, that would only happen if the woman

I have sex with has a bald dad, so I'd

have to only impregnate women with hairy

dads.

Although my perfect girlfriend, she

wouldn't have a dad.

That'd be the best.

I don't really want to date a girl who's

got a dad, to be honest.

Oh my gosh, fucking hell.

I can't even do anything without slipping.

Why is life so hard?

Have I seen Crip's dad?

No, she never mentions him, so I'm

assuming he's not in the picture.

Apparently that dad of Cake was not her

real dad though.

Although maybe I would have a more healthy

relationship if I had a girlfriend who

didn't have daddy problems.

What do you think?

Chihiro?

Do you think Chihiro has daddy problems?

Because she—

I don't— I don't really remember the

story.

I don't think the dad left at a young age.

I think that she was like in her 20s when

the dad left, because the dad left the mum

and got remarried to some Korean woman.

So he kind of left the family.

I don't know if Chihiro hated him.

She didn't seem bothered.

Yeah, the dad died, um, but before he

died, he left the family and married a

Korean woman, and then he died.

Don't blame him.

I'm sure his mom's a bitch.

Don't blame him at all.

Have I been to Taiwan?

Yup.

Stayed there for a month.

I fancied this Taiwanese girl.

I stayed at her family's house thinking

she was going to bang me, but it never

happened.

I was just like freeloading at her house

for a month waiting for sex to happen, and

it never happened.

And then I finally gave up because she

wasn't hanging out with me.

It was so annoying.

She would go to work doing night shift,

come home in the morning,

and then

go to sleep and then wake up and go to

work again.

The guy who sent me the screenshots

deleted the screenshots.

What, do you not want me to show them?

Scared I'm going to ruin your chances.

Okay,

secret's safe with me.

Taiwanese girl.

Yeah, she's probably still in the UK.

Her son must be nearly 10 years old.

She said she was living like in the middle

of the country, in the countryside.

Well, I thought Jahira had a guy now, so

I'm a bit confused.

Unless she's single now, or unless she's

cheating.

Well, unless she's in an open

relationship.

Tell him Daniel sends his regards when you

nut.

No, I'm just kidding.

Although it would be interesting to know

where she lives now if you go back to her

place.

I bet she just moved down the road.

I bet you anything she's still in

Tachibana.

For some reason she would, would not want

to move away from Tachibana because that's

where her family lives, just like Sunny.

It's funny, Chihiro's like double the age

of Sunny.

Tachibana.

Because we moved out of— no, we didn't.

We got a new place.

It was on the other side of the Tachibana

train station.

And then when my dad died and we kind of

separated for a bit, she moved out of that

new house and then moved back to the other

side of the train station where we

originally came from.

But then this time in a new build.

Tachibana is a shithole.

I guess it's cheap and it's just full of

old people, so it's not really dangerous,

but it just looks old, like old Japan

vibes.

Yeah, Chihiro would never date someone her

age.

I remember she said to me the reason why

she dates younger guys is because

Anyone her age who's still single, there

must be a problem with them.

Like they've got baggage or they've got

mental problems.

That's why they're single.

And they're going to be fat and bald and

like ugly Japanese salaryman.

She's kind of got a point.

I mean, if you're over 40 and you're like

looking to date,

you're either a divorcee

and you got kids Or you're like some

massive loser for some reason hasn't been

able to get a girlfriend until you're in

your 40s, or you're just undateable and

you keep breaking up.

I mean, that's what's going to happen to

me, isn't it?

I'll be in my 40s at some point, single

again, because every girl just dumps me.

I'm sure there's, there's good guys in

their 40s who are single through no fault

of their own.

Who are decent?

Well, I think she just likes the looks of

a younger guy too.

But she did tell me one time she was into

watching porn where it was like old guy

banging a young girl.

How did she meet Lachlan?

On Tinder, probably.

Did you know TK Sam knows him?

They're kind of like friends.

They DM each other.

TKO Sam has his WhatsApp.

When I met TKO Sam, TKO Sam started

messaging him

and he was like, please Sam, I don't want

anything to do with Daniel.

I like my life in Japan and I want a

future here.

He was scared.

Imagine big tough rugby man scared of me.

That's what you get for banging my

ex-wife.

Just be glad I didn't use your picture in

the— in a video.

Just be glad I didn't even make a video

yet.

One day,

when I'm out of ideas.

The Australian guy, full exposé.

Oh yeah, that's good.

Toothpick right in the ear hole.

I'm so bored now, I'm like pumping out

these videos about Chihiro.

Today I made another video, this time

hating on Chris Broad.

Now I'm like, I just don't care, I'm just

gonna pump out a load of stuff shitting on

everyone.

If it gets 3K views, that's like $15.

Whatever.

Yeah, I've gone unhinged mode.

I just don't care anymore.

Got no one to please, no one to lose.

Sunny was kind of keeping me on the

straight and narrow,

relatively.

Yeah, I was kind of on better behavior

because I was with Sunny, but then I lost

her anyway.

Rachel and Jun had a baby.

Didn't even know.

I'm surprised they didn't have one

already.

Haven't they been together for over 10

years?

Yeah, when PewDiePie has his second kid,

I'll just make the same video again.

Or I delete the old one and I just

re-upload it because the same thing would

apply, wouldn't it?

Miscarriage.

It's not really— I can't really touch

that, can I?

Sometimes there is such thing as going too

far.

Didn't, uh, that other girl's baby

miscarry as well?

What's her name?

The Canadian white girl in Japan, Mikayla.

She had a mis— no, yeah, she had a

miscarriage as well.

How unfortunate.

I wonder if she still makes videos.

She got really fat.

Mikaela Japan.

Her channel died.

She's got more views than me.

She's got 52 million.

I've got about 40 million.

Uh-huh, 9K views, dead channel.

9K, 12K, 21K, 36K, 14K,

dead channel.

The video is so boring.

Did she have another kid?

Whose kid is that?

Is that hers?

It's quite grown up, looks like 5 years

old.

She must have had another kid straight

after the miscarriage.

Look at her face.

You know I was talking about upper lip

talkers?

Jeez.

Every time she speaks, all her upper teeth

are completely visible.

She literally speaks like this.

Like, hey guys, I'm Mikaela.

I'm in Japan.

It's so great.

You can see all my upper teeth all the

time whenever I speak.

But every time you like stop on her face,

she kind of looks like Sunny.

Sometimes she looks like a weird mixture

of Mida and Sunny.

Yes, I think she got Japanese— no, I don't

know, a white guy, cuz the kid's

completely— yeah, the guy's white

and he's got long hair.

That's the guy, that's the kid.

She was quite pretty when she was younger.

She's still not bad looking.

Kid's got blue eyes, blonde hair.

She does kind of look a bit like Sunny in

a way.

But less ginger and more blondie brown.

I don't know how people speak like that

with their upper teeth exposed all the

time.

Isn't it really tiring having your lip

raised up like that all the time?

When I do this, I go into a weird accent

as well.

Start speaking a bit like lower-class

British.

She got very pointy teeth as well.

What did I have for lunch?

I had— I actually didn't have lunch.

I had an early breakfast.

I had a big fat breakfast.

2 sausages, 2 bacons, 2 hash browns, and

an egg.

And then I fell asleep.

Then I had more— I had another 2 sausages

afterwards because our batch cooked about

8 sausages.

Get a bit hungry, just go get a sausage.

My face gets tired if I keep doing that.

What is the market doing?

It's like making a little staircase.

Good thing I took my £2 profit.

You could probably go long again here and

get another pound.

Not worth it.

Release the sausages.

Okay, what are we gonna do now?

Uh, it's actually dinner time,

7:20.

I've gotta eat another potato.

I don't know what to do with it this time.

Baked potato, put some butter in it and

cabbage and Caesar salad.

It'll be like coleslaw.

I'm thinking baked potato with those

chicken wings.

How do you make a baked potato?

I just put the whole thing in the air

fryer.

How to cook baked potato.

200 degrees.

Poke it with a fork.

Rub the skin with olive oil.

55 minutes.

55 minutes.

Maybe I'll put it in now.

Said 45 to 55 minutes at 200 degrees.

Wouldn't it burn at 200 degrees?

I hate that, um, Instagram channel or

YouTube channel where it's like POV and he

works in a food truck and they sell baked

potatoes

in England and they just cover it in all

these toppings.

It looks disgusting.

How do you eat it?

You just completely drown the potato in

beans and cheese and meat and stuff.

Yeah.

Have you seen it?

He gives it away for free to some

customers.

And he's like, all right mate, what you

want on your spud today?

I think they're called spud bros.

Yeah, it always looks so gross.

How do you even eat that?

This is like a load of brown slop on top

of a potato.

And then they sometimes have the bring

your own chips thing, so they— a customer

come bring a bag of Crisps, and then

they'll open the big bag of crisps and

chuck in a load of cheese and toppings and

stuff and then mix it.

It looks so gross.

The chips are gonna— I mean, the crisps

are gonna go all soggy.

Oh, hey Crypt, how much money did you get

from the donos?

Dono update.

I want to put butter, a garlic butter, and

I got cheese and some cabbage.

It's just really annoying to eat because

it'd be really hot.

Oh wow, I got a new OnlyFans thingy, a new

member.

I've got 48 fans now,

$480 a month, pretty good.

I gotta start posting more, like 2 times a

week, not 1 time a week.

But I wonder if, because most of them are

gay guys,

what if they, they don't want to see me

banging a woman?

187.

Damn.

What's our goal?

Is that dollar, like US dollars or

Canadian dollars?

Post my link.

Um, okay, where do I get it from?

I think you sent it to me on Discord.

Yeah,

mute.

Crips PayPal to visit me for cereal.

Yeah, we don't have any bots anymore.

Finally!

I told you it'd be over after a few weeks.

I knew they'd get bored.

Goal is 1,300.

Oh, we're still quite far away then.

What if she runs away with the money?

Yeah, I mean, that could be a possibility.

Then you guys all got scammed and it

wasn't my fault.

I didn't lose anything.

I mean, if I gave her the money and then

she ran away with the money, then I would

have lost my money.

But this is your guys' money.

So think of it as an investment with risk.

It's a speculative investment.

Well, you know, I have to spread the risk.

So if everyone chips in a tiny bit,

Then it's not like a massive loss, is it?

That's basically what investment's all

about.

Spread the risk.

I would probably run with the money.

Uh, no.

If I got paid to go on a free sex trip,

I'd go on the sex trip.

Stop ignoring me.

Uh, been good, I guess.

Don't know when the last time you checked

in was.

I got dumped, I lost my job, my mum kicked

me out.

Um, I got a house.

Things have been rough, but I'm still

standing, and that's all that matters.

As long as you stay standing and keep

getting back up,

the world can never defeat you.

You weren't kicked out?

My mum literally said, get out of my

house, both of you.

And then I said, okay, I got a car now, so

I can just leave, can't I?

Before, I wouldn't have been able to do

that.

Now I've got a car, I can just go wherever

I want

as long as there's EV chargers.

All the haters pining over Crypts, they're

gonna be seething.

They're probably gonna pay up money to, to

watch us bang on OnlyFans,

and then they're gonna like hate wank off.

To me banging Crips when they thought it

could have been them.

Oh wow, thanks, David.

Have you seen Crypt's pics?

She going to crush you.

Yeah, but she's short, isn't she?

And one thing, to be honest, I don't

really like to have the girl on top.

It's hard, like, to get the angle in,

and I feel, I don't know, weird about it.

I think it would only really work if the

girl was extremely tiny, like a midget.

Then maybe,

because I'm not just— I'm not really big

enough

to— I'm not like big enough physically

unless the girl's really tiny.

I like being on top.

I've never liked being on the bottom.

I remember Farsa used to try and ride me

and I just wouldn't like it.

The dick would like pop out and it would

not be good, and I can't control the

movement.

Yeah, I didn't like it.

Oh God, the market's not doing anything.

It's like going up in a tiny channel, inch

by inch, like a roller coaster.

What is it waiting for?

I think Fed minutes.

I don't even know what that is.

It's coming out.

I thought it already came out.

And then Nvidia earnings.

The whole market is waiting for Nvidia

earnings.

The hell?

Why can't I hear someone's voice?

How loud are they?

I hope shutting the conservatory door

makes it quieter.

Can we get a— it's time, King!

In a few hours.

Am I going to short Nvidia for earnings?

I'm already short the whole market since

yesterday.

I don't have any money to go more short.

I'm already fully short.

I'm down £35.

I mean, that's an improvement over down

£40.

I mean, I could put my Ethereum earnings

into it,

but no,

I don't want to keep putting money into

the day trading account.

Too risky.

I've got $200 in my OnlyFans account I

need to shuffle over to my main accounts,

and then I'll be at

I'll be at £440 in my bank account.

So when I pay next month's expenses, I'd

only be down

£700 overdraft, which is not bad.

I mean, it's not bad considering that last

month, or this month, or the beginning of

this month, I was in overdraft of £1,900.

At the beginning of next month, I should

only be in overdraft of £700.

So that's a massive improvement.

I can't sell Barak until 2nd of June,

until they have this hearing with the Mali

government to sort out this confiscated

gold problem.

Really need a market crash in the next 5

weeks.

Otherwise, I don't know.

I won't have enough money to pay off the

Amazon card.

I've only got 4,000.

I need 5,000.

Okay, mate, some potatoes, I guess.

5K is nothing.

Well, give me 5K then,

Mr.

Rich.

Oh no, my

phone.

I didn't get the sushi picture that I was

going to show you.

I completely forgot.

Ah, look, me and Shahid were having

dinner.