Late Night Vegetable Chopping

Hello and welcome back to another

vegetable chopping stream, my most

popular series on the channel.

Am I actually gonna move to Russia? No,

come on, you can't be telling me that some

people actually believe that was real.

It was the fakest video I've ever made.

How are people still believing it's real?

I literally went, I'm so sad.

My goodness.

I was wondering, how fake can

I make this? With people still thinking

it's real. I even did the fake

crying, rubbing my eye going, boohoo.

Well, a lot of people knew it was fake,

but there was just still hundreds and

hundreds of comments of people thinking it

was real. I don't even know what to say.

I was always worried in the past that my

acting wasn't good enough or people would

think I'm trolling, so I always put in

a lot of effort in my monologues when I

was ranting. But this time I thought,

what if I just didn't try at all to make

it seem convincing?

I still find it really sad and depressing

that the videos that I make that get the

most views are this stupid fake stuff like

that. This makes you feel like, what's the

point of even trying? 10K views. I think

it has 11K views now.

Might as well just do more crazy stuff

like that, like my ex-girlfriend's

pregnant, or I

got kidnapped. I don't know.

Do do do do do do

do do do do.

How's my Bitcoin? My Bitcoin is up $100.

I can't believe it. I bought just before

it started blowing up, but the bad news is

I also bought Ethereum, and that just kind

of went down. So I'm down 100 Ethereum.

I'm up 100 Bitcoin. So. Zero gains.

Shouldn't have got Ethereum.

Okay, I'll chop my veg. Should I make

coffee so I can drink my coffee whilst

chopping, or should I chop first and then

make my coffee?

How much have I made in total? I think I

made about £3,000 now,

but I had some losses. I did make some

stupid mistakes. I had to cut Amazon off

because they were just constantly in the

red, so I had to take a couple hundred in

losses from selling Amazon. Amazon's so

annoying. I bought it when it was just way

too high when I first started investing,

not realizing that it was overvalued. And

then it just dropped, and then it just

kept on dropping, and it never went back

as high as the time I bought it. And I was

fed up with seeing it red.

Amazon's just a waste of time.

I'm still stuck with Zoom, but if I sell

Zoom, I'd lose like £600, so I

guess I'm just stuck with it. Stupid Zoom.

So annoying seeing my account in minus all

the time because of one stupid stock. My

Zoom investment is down by nearly 40%.

So I just sold my 5,000 that was in

Amazon. Took a loss of a couple hundred,

and I pumped it into this random company

called DraftKings, which is supposed

to be doing really well. So I put $4,000

into DraftKings, $1,000 into Palantir,

$1,000 into American Airlines.

Uh, what else did I get? I think

that's it. I'm just betting that the

American Airlines is going to come back to

life when this is all over.

Oh, and guess what? I got $4,000 in Tesla

before it got included into the

S&P, so I can profit if I sell my Tesla

now. I could get £1,000, which is

like $1,500 if I sell now. I don't know if

I should sell now.

So that was lucky.

I was kind of disappointed because I, I

miscalculated. I thought I was going to

make £2,000 off Tesla. I was so stupid

because I was, I was calculating the new

value in dollars and then subtracting that

from my initial investment in pounds.

And I didn't realize that until the next

day. And I was expecting my Tesla

to be £2,000+ in gains, and I woke up and

it was only about £600. So disappointing.

It's kind of like you just buy a stock and

then you have to wait for good news that

would make it pop. And then

usually you just sell after it's popped

because it will start going down again.

It depends what you want to do.

I don't really know what I want to do yet.

I thought I did, but now I'm not sure. I

thought I was just going to buy and hold,

but now I'm getting into the short trading

stuff,

and buy and hold is just kind of boring.

I want to sell now and make the money,

not wait 5 years. I can't

believe it. If I sell my Tesla now, I'd

make $1,500. That's more than I make on

YouTube in the entire month.

How many of you wished that the whole— the

last video was real and I was actually

gonna go to Russia? Some people messaged

me saying, are you really going to Russia?

If you come to Russia, can we meet up?

As if I'd actually go to Russia. Can you

imagine me going to Russia?

Ouch, poked myself.

Have I booked my ticket back to England?

No, I checked for tickets. They're so

cheap now, it's only about £30 British

Airways direct to London. When I came to

Germany, I spent over £200 on my flight

Still not sure what to do.

Hmm, don't really know what

to do, to be honest. I'm leaning towards

go back home.

There's 3 options: go home, find out

if I can stay in the Netherlands longer,

but then I have to find out where I'm

going to live because I don't really want

to live here in this apartment, or go to

Belgium or Germany since they're nearby

and they're much cheaper. Maybe I'll do a

community poll, see what people think.

Or we could do, we could do a list later

on with pros and cons. Of each option.

That'd be fun. I like doing lists.

Okay, what am I doing with this pepper?

What am I making tomorrow?

I want some diced pepper for, for, uh,

fried rice. Yeah. And then I want some

pepper strips for stir-fry because I got a

big fat steak I might cook that.

No, tomorrow I'm cooking fried rice.

Right now I'm kind of focused on Just

trying to save as much money as I can so I

can invest it.

But I'm still not sure what to do for

long-term investing because my plan was to

do dividend investing, but I ended up

selling all my dividend stocks because

they went up in value. That's the annoying

thing. I find a good stock to invest in

for dividends and then they go up by a

couple hundred and I think to myself, I

could sell this now and make more money

than I'd make by waiting a whole year for

dividends,

and then I end up with no dividends left,

but I profited from selling them, I guess.

You just don't get much money from

dividends. You need to invest loads.

For example, if I invested $4,000

into Coca-Cola, they would just give me

$30 in dividends next month.

It just, it's not very impressive.

Did I get decent CPM on my last video?

No, it was rubbish. I only made $22 off

it and it got 11K views, and my investing

video only got 3K views and it made $17.

So it got a third of the views but made

almost the same money.

The investing videos just make so much

more than the drama stuff.

I just wish I had an audience that watched

that stuff or was interested in it. Makes

There's no money in drama.

Yeah, I'm kind of stuck with my audience,

which is why I keep making the stuff that

I make.

It just takes a lot of time to get a new

audience. It doesn't happen instantly.

It took me years to get the audience I

have now, and I

got it from just moaning about how much my

life sucks all the time.

But if the investment stuff gets the same

amount as the drama stuff does, maybe I

might as well just focus on that.

It'll get less views, but if it's not

making that much less money— but the low

views just make me feel annoyed. It's not

just about money, I guess. There's like an

ego part of myself that gets annoyed

seeing how low the views are.

I'm thinking about— I don't know,

sometimes I think about getting an iPhone

12. Maybe I shouldn't.

I don't know why I want one. It doesn't

make any sense. I don't even use my phone

most of the time. I'm on my iPad.

Yeah, I guess I won't get one. I still

think the iPad's the best because it's

more comfortable when you're sitting on

the bed and you can use the pen to tap

away. If you had a MacBook, the keyboard

would get in the way.

Yeah, I guess the iPad is the best

solution. I don't know, I just get bored

and I want something new.

Guess I shouldn't buy anything. It just

feels boring unless there's something you

want to buy.

Okay, now I'll do pepper strips.

But it doesn't seem like my investing

portfolio is growing. At all.

Oh, thank you, Rio. Invest in penny stocks

and day trade. I guess that's kind of what

I'm putting 1,000 in here and 1,000 in

there, seeing what goes up and down.

Yeah, I'm pretty proud of myself that I

managed to earn enough money for the

entire month just from the stock market

without even YouTube added into my

spreadsheet. I've already made enough

money that I need to pay for rent. I

already made £2,200

just from stock market stuff, but I guess

I got pretty lucky this month.

Is it luck or is it skill? No, probably

not skill.

Problem is Amazon and Zoom. I think I'd be

up quite a bit. My portfolio should be

going up, but it, it hasn't because of a

few mistakes I made.

Annoying.

But I haven't actually taken the money

out. I just reinvested it because I don't

desperately need the money, so I

might as well just reinvest it because I

want to grow my portfolio so it gets

bigger and bigger. But how am I supposed

to do that when I keep selling every time

stuff goes up? I sold almost everything

I had that I bought in October. So it's

not going to grow, is it? I had

Coca-Cola, 3M,

ABBV, I had Google, and they all went up

and I made about a couple hundred dollars

on each and I just sold them.

I don't know if this strategy is good.

What else am I supposed to do? If I took

it out, then it would be in my bank, but I

don't want it in my bank. I want it to be

invested.

Maybe I'll sell Tesla. Do you think it's

gonna go much higher?

I feel like it's just gonna stay around

the $500 mark and not really go up a lot

anytime soon.

But then I hear stuff like, oh, Tesla is

gonna be worth $2,000

a share in the year 2022. Wow,

if I bought 12 shares at $400 and

then those 12 shares become worth $2,000

in a few years, how much would I be

profiting?

That would be 12 times $1,500.

Uh, it's only a couple thousand, isn't it?

12 times $1,000— no, 10 times $1,500.

That's $50,000. What? I'd make over

$10,000. Are you

joking? What?

But is it really going to be worth $2,000

per share next year? Wait, in 2 years?

Oh, it's just so hard to think long term

because I'm not a very patient person and

I just want the money now.

But if you're saying if I be patient I

could make 18— no, I could make 1,500

now, or I could make 20,000 in 2 years.

Then you would be stupid to take the 1,000

Maybe I just put everything in Tesla.

Just sell everything else and put my

entire 20,000 into Tesla. Why not?

I guess I do kind of need the money.

Well, I don't need it. But I

might need it because

I'd like to become less— I would like to

rely less on YouTube for money because I'm

getting sick and tired of doing it, and

it's just really stressful when you're

relying on YouTube so much and your

channel's dying.

Just don't know what's there.

Okay, finished one pepper. I think it's

time for a break. I will make a coffee.

Real estate. I don't have enough money to

invest in real estate. I've only got about

£40,000.

What can I do with £40,000?

And I still don't really know where I want

to be. I still have ideas of

going back to Japan. I have ideas of going

back to England.

Today was

really annoying. That stupid idiot was

running up and down for at least 2 hours

straight. I don't know who it is or what

they're doing. I think it's a kid, but

they were just running up and down nonstop

for about 2 hours.

So irritating.

And then someone was horning— honking

their car really long outside,

and then someone was running up and down

the stairs. Stupid people.

It's just so

irritating. They— it's like they found me

the most annoying, noisy people in the

entire city. To live under.

Why can't I have a nice quiet couple, you

know, who just go to work and then come

home and then sit down and watch TV?

It's like we've got an entire refugee camp

living above me and

all they do is shout and run up and down

all day long.

Yeah, there's this massive explosion on

the street as well a few days ago. I think

it was a firework.

But Mila did say about how near Christmas

they start doing fireworks, but they don't

do nice pretty fireworks that look nice.

They do these stupid exploding fireworks

that just bang.

So primitive. It's like, oh wow, big

noise, hahaha, so exciting,

big noise, go boom boom bang.

Bunch of idiots.

Just blowing up money. You're spending

money to blow something up,

and that entertains you. My God,

I never understood fireworks. I think it's

a waste of money. All that money,

thousands and thousands, just to blow it

up into the sky for What, 5 seconds

of flashing lights?

Onions are so annoying to cut when you get

to the end. It all splits apart and you

can't hold it together anymore.

This knife used to be quite sharp, but I

guess it's been a month now. It's nearly

been 2 months actually. I can't believe

it. Been here for nearly 2 months in

this stupid apartment. I haven't

really done anything interesting though.

Since I came here.

It's funny, when I first got here, did a

lot of sightseeing, went to a lot of

different places every time.

But since I moved in here, I just go to

the supermarket and then come back.

I went to The Hague. That was quite nice

actually. Went to the beach,

had a burger, nearly walked off without

paying, but then I felt kind of bad and

decided to pay because I just walked off

so easily. They have all these restaurants

on the beach at The Hague, and they have

all these armchairs and sofas on the

beach, and you just sit on one and the

waiter comes and serves you food. But you

can just walk off so easily without

That's why poor people are poor, cuz they

do stupid stuff like buying fireworks,

wasting money.

The poor stay poor because they're dumb.

They waste it on rubbish like

smoking and drinking.

Oh,

my eyes are burning now.

Stupid eyes.

At least with that, I use it.

My iPad helps me a lot.

I don't just blow it up and then it's gone

in 10 seconds.

I use the iPad every day, so it's a pretty

important thing for me to own.

I do pretty much everything on it,

and it's way cheaper than a computer or a

good laptop.

I think it was a pretty good investment.

It's probably paid for itself already from

all the artwork I did.

Let me check my stocks. I can't stop

checking my bloody stocks now. It's like

Check my stocks. Tesla, Tesla,

Tesla. Fuck, it went

down. It was as high as 507,

and now it's dropped down to 496.

Where's the other one? DraftKings.

DraftKings is going sideways,

so it's fine. I don't know why I put 4,000

on DraftKings. I feel kind of stupid now

because I heard a lot of people say good

things about it. So DraftKings is an

online betting website for sports betting,

and they say it's gonna be huge when the

lockdowns finish and people

go back to normal life and sports starts

happening again.

Also, the, um, you know, sports can still

happen, they just have no audience in

this, in the stadiums. But you could still

bet on the sports, so DraftKings would

still win in a kind of semi-lockdown

situation.

How much savings do I have left? I have

about £2,000 left in my bank. I can't

believe it. Last time I had only £2,000 in

my bank was probably when I was 17 years

old.

NIO was a bit disappointing. I thought on

earning— earnings day it was going to

explode, but it didn't really because

XPeng and Li Auto did. When they had

earnings day, they went really up.

NIO just kind of flat— flattened out a

bit. It's still going up, but just not as

much as it was going up before. I think

I'll sell soon because I don't really feel

like holding on to it.

I'm currently up about $900 on NIO.

I made 1,000 on Xpeng.

Wow, that coffee's good. I got Jacob's

Coffee. I'm not sure which country it's

from, but it's nice.

Why do I even come back to watch each

time? Because you love

me.

Is that why?

Did I really break up with Mila? No, that

whole video was fake.

I even just copy and pasted some of the

complaints from the Turkish girl. You

know, they're sitting on my lap, not

letting me do what I want to do. No one

even noticed. No one even said, aren't

these the same things you complained about

Turkish girls? So I'm gonna do a why I

hate my ex-girlfriend fake video. And I'm

just going to say the exact same stuff I

said about Chihiro. Like, she does the

laundry every day and she leaves the hair

dryer on the floor and she keeps wrapping

my onions in cling film. I bet you

anything no one's going to notice that

it's the exact same things I complained

about Chihiro. People have zero

attention to detail skills.

Did I even try to act well in the video?

No, I didn't even try.

I'm so sad.

I'll try and make it more realistic next

time.

I'm starting to think that people have

convinced themselves so much that I'm a

loser and they are better than me and my

life sucks that they'll just believe

anything because they've preconditioned

their brains into believing that Daniel

is a loser If he's less

of a loser than I am, that then that makes

me feel bad. So I have to brainwash myself

into believing Daniel is a loser,

even when it's really obvious that he's

faking it.

Because I think the idea that I'm not a

loser actually scares some of them

because.

If I'm not as big a loser as they think I

am, what's it gonna make them feel like?

It's gonna make them feel bad about

themselves.

And there's probably a lot of people who

watch my channel to feel better about

their own lives, and it makes them feel

better because they've got this idea in

their head that my life is really shit and

I suck. And I'm miserable.

And if I break that illusion with things

like talking about how much money I made

on the stock market, they don't want to

know because it ruins

the illusion, you know.

That's just my theory.

So many people comment stuff like, your

life is so shit, I'd hate to

I just complain a lot. Even if I won the

lottery, I'd probably still be nonstop

complaining.

Objectively, my life is pretty good if you

think about it.

I make decent money. I make more money

than most of my viewers if you look at my

poll. And that was back when I asked if

you make more than 3K. Now I definitely

make more than 3K. I've got

a girlfriend, I've got my own place, I'm

healthy, I'm not in a lot of pain. I don't

really have much to complain about, but

that's what I spend most of my time online

doing, so— oh, thank you, Ricky.

It's going okay, I guess. Don't know, I

feel a bit down today. I'm not sure why.

I should feel good because I, I lucked out

so much on Tesla. I don't

know, I just feel a bit bummed out.

Not really sure why. Just trying to find

something to cheer myself up with.

I want— what I'm looking for is kind of

like a warm feeling. Not a physically warm

feeling, but something that gives me this

warm orange glow that would wash over my

body. I'm not sure

how to get it.

I used to get it by doing things like

putting on a podcast and playing some

Rainbow Six.

Now I get it by playing this MOBA

game on iPad called Vainglory, and I just

play that for hours and hours with some

pod— some video going on in the

background. Or I do some drawing and I

just listen to 8 hours of ASMR cafe

jazz music. That's usually quite relaxing.

I've got this idea for a drawing. It's

gonna be my ideal room.

I've been thinking of this room in my

mind a lot. And what

does it look like? Well, I'm in an

armchair and I've got a little table,

and on the table it's got, I don't know,

a MacBook Pro, and I've got a cup of

coffee. And then to my right there's a

roaring fireplace burning away,

and there's carpet with a nice rug Maybe

bookcases in the background. And it's

nighttime and there's a big window in

front of me and it's raining and the rain

is pitter-patting against the window.

And I'm just sitting there sipping my

coffee, checking my stocks, and maybe

there's a cat as well.

And I'm just listening to the rain and the

fire's roaring away. And there's no noise

anywhere, and I'm in this big mansion high

up, and there's maybe

lightning flashing as well. That'd be

nice. I want to draw that scene from a

first-person perspective.

Maybe it's kind of like the Harry Potter

common room where they have— it's

all kind of wooden and red and carpet,

and there's a fireplace and comfy

armchairs.

That'd be great.

Why is garlic like this?

This is a metal knife, it's just painted

white, by the way.

No, it's not. Look, you can see the blade,

it's silver. They've just put a white

coating on it.

Garlic makes such a mess.

Why is this Garlic.

Weird. Started watching this Star Trek

series called Star Trek Discovery.

I tried watching it ages ago when it first

came out and I thought it was boring, but

it's not too bad, I guess.

It seems a little bit heavy

on the heavy feminist side with all the

female captains,

and there's too much, you know, try-hard

diversity going on.

I can't even cut this garlic with this.

Wow, that's a lot of wasted garlic.

Just can't really find a good TV show to

watch.

After I finished Ozark. Ozark was

okay, but it was getting a bit boring near

It started off okay and the middle was

interesting, but near the end it was just

getting a bit repetitive. There was like a

pattern. And then every time there's a

problem, they'd just kill the guy and the

problem would go away, or a new problem

would come afterwards and then they'd kill

him too. Why can't I even

cut this garlic? The Queen's Gambit.

I watched that with Mido. It was so

boring. It's just a girl playing chess.

I don't like these shows where it's about

people. I'm not really a people person. I

like spaceships and space exploration and

cool ideas and concepts. I'm not

interested in some random person's life.

So shows that are all about some person's

life where I'm supposed to care about the

person I find incredibly boring unless

there's something that hooks you. I like

Peep Show because it was funny and

it had that nice kind of— it gives you

that nice fuzzy warm feeling.

Shows where the characters are girls. I

cannot relate to, so I'll never find

interesting. So automatically anything

with a female protagonist is just going to

be boring to me. Number 2, shows about

kids or teenagers I'll find instantly

boring. I hate kids, they piss me off.

So no women, no kids. I need a

male-oriented, male protagonist show with

spaceships and science and technology.

I just find every single show that is

female-oriented to be so boring because

I'm used to watching shows where women are

the side characters. You know, you've got

Harry Potter and Ron, and then there's

Hermione, the side character.

What you've got? Lord of the Rings. All

men, no women in Lord of the Rings.

That's why it's a great movie. Sorry,

women, just don't like stuff with women in

it. Every movie with lots

of female characters is just rubbish.

I need strong male leads, cool looking

guys, not these stupid lesbian looking

guys.

You know, back in my day we had cool

characters like Captain Kirk,

Aragorn, Gimli, I wouldn't

say Frodo is cool.

Who else do we have? What's his name in

Die Hard? John McClane.

See, this is the problem. Bloody SJWs

ruining everything with

their diversity rubbish.

And oh, we need strong female characters.

I just don't find that stuff interesting

at all.

That's the thing that pisses me off. They

come in here ruining stuff like Star Wars

with the left-wing propaganda.

Star Wars is a movie for guys, and then

they just made it into a stupid load of

rubbish because

they want it to be for girls as well.

Star Wars is for boys and Barbie is for

girls. Stop trying to make Star Wars for

girls. It's not.

Why can't they just leave our guy stuff

Bloody Star Wars, this stupid Rey Mary

Sue. All bloody Mary Sues.

Sick and tired of Mary Sues.

Now they're ruining Star Trek. The first

episode of Star Trek Discovery, woman

captain, woman second in command,

and then the, the Black woman kills the

Chinese captain woman, and then she gets

sent to a new ship and there's another

woman in charge.

Well, she died already, actually.

Star Trek is for guys, not women.

It's a, it's a male-dominated audience,

so they should make this stuff aimed at

males. So stupid.

Men and women just don't really like the

same stuff. Women like shows that are all

about the characters and all about the

character's life and their struggles,

and men like things like cool things like

spaceships and explosions and maybe Evil

aliens that the humans have to fight

against. I don't want to see

some boring show about Jill,

Jill Thompson, who lives at the boarding

school and has to overcome her problems of

being abandoned and find love and

connections. So boring. Oh my God, I want

to see cool soldiers with laser guns

fighting aliens and they blow each other's

limbs off and there's blood everywhere and

there's weird aliens that burst out of

stomachs. That's what I want to see.

And I want to see spaceships and

fighting, not, not poor

Jill who wants to connect with her

estranged parents And is an orphan and

has problems. I couldn't give a shit about

Jill. Why can't

Jill join the army and then get a laser

gun and kill everyone? That'll be good.

Yeah, Starship Troopers, one of my

favorites. Alien, I like all the Alien

movies. Halo, I think Halo

had a great story. I loved it.

Halo was a video game, but it had a story

better than most movies. The epic struggle

of survival, humanity's epic struggle for

survival against the Covenant. It was so

cool. Master Chief coming in to

rescue everyone.

That's what I like.

Am I feeling better today? Um, I don't

know. I feel kind of bored, to be honest.

All I do is check my stocks.

I just sit there watching the line go up

driving me a bit crazy actually.

Let me check my stocks.

Come on, DraftKings!

Yes, yes, fuck yes,

DraftKings! Grow,

my baby!

DraftKings up 1% means I get £50—

I mean £50 in earnings.

My Tesla is up 22%.

I've got Palantir, that's up 3%. I've got

PayPal, American Airlines.

I want to get rid of Apple. Apple is such

a boring stock to own. It doesn't do

anything. There's no There's hardly

any dividends. They gave me 91 pence for

dividends. It doesn't go up or down, it

just kind of goes sideways the whole time.

Last 2 months it hasn't moved, barely

moved at all.

I hate it when you buy a stock and then it

goes down straight away. And then it

doesn't go up, and then you're stuck with

it. It's like you invite a

girl over for sex, and then she doesn't go

home, and then you're stuck with her.

Now, Apple and Amazon are like the Turkish

girl. You're stuck

with them, and they just make you

Glad you like my acting.

I'm getting déjà vu. I feel like I've done

this before, this conversation. Weird.

Yeah, I'm kind of fed up. I don't know if

people notice, but my videos are always

kind of exaggerated, you know, even when

it was true. Stuff like Chihiro suing me

or me getting kicked out, I never really

cared that much, but I had to make it seem

like I kind of cared and I was kind of

annoyed. So I would just be like, oh, so

annoying, she wants to sue me. I can't

believe she's doing this. I had to make it

convincing. I really honestly didn't give

a shit at the time,

but I had to try and make it entertaining.

But I'm just getting fed up with it

because I've never really aspired to

becoming an actor. Acting has never really

been something I'm interested in.

No, last video was 100% fake.

Well, if people still find the drama stuff

more— because

I don't think there's anything else I can

offer that is entertaining.

I can talk about stocks, I guess.

I think people would rather have the fake

drama than the stock stuff.

I wanted to make a story, actually.

That's what I want to do. I want to write

out a story and then read it for videos as

an audiobook. Jimbo's Journey to Japan.

Where he becomes an English teacher and

has sex with his underage female students.

That'd be such a great story.

Jimbo from the small village of

Maidstone. No, Maidstone's a town.

It would go like this. Jimbo woke up one

morning feeling really bored. He hated his

job at McDonald's and wanted to try

something new. He was always interested in

anime and thought to himself, why don't I

go to Japan? I could be an English

teacher. He packed his things and went

to Japan. And became an English teacher.

No, I think I suck at writing stories as

well.

Should I do it third person or first

person? Jimbo woke up the

next morning. He was confused. He didn't

know where he was. He was naked. He looked

to his left and he saw The

buttocks of a young girl and her black

long flowing hair.

Who's this? He thought to himself. I don't

remember this or who she is. Did we have

intercourse? He wondered to himself.

She was still sleeping and snoring. She

turned over to face Jimbo. And he saw her

face. It is Kotomi

from my class at school that I teach.

Did we have sex? But isn't she 15?

Jimbo felt very bad but also very turned

on at the same time. What do you think?

Do you think it would be good?

Jimbo started getting an erection. No,

I was just getting bored and then I'd make

it really sexual and then I wouldn't be

able to read it on YouTube because I

couldn't put ads on it.

Jimbo rubbed his hard cock in between her

ass cheeks and slowly eased it in.

Yeah, maybe I should stop.

Or I can make fan fiction of YouTubers.

Aki dearest, the sweat was

dripping off her folds in the hot summer's

That's just wrong, isn't it? She said no,

but I was too horny and couldn't stop

myself. It slipped in like a

sausage into butter.

It could be called The Rapening. The

right— The Rapening of Tokyo.

I think all my inner demons would get

released if I started writing.

He tied up Joey to a chair and made him

watch as he

unleashed his 12-incher quarter-pounder

with mayonnaise and onions.

Why does garlic make your fingers sticky?

Why not make porn comics? Because I don't

know where to put them. I made one really

good drawing of me effing a fat

Japanese girl. I put it on my OnlyFans.

It looked really good. I was really skinny

and I'm on top of this really fat girl and

her legs are spread. I wish I could show

it here, but I'd get a ban. I'd get a

strike.

You know, KFC is such a rip-off. I got a

bucket of chicken last time, remember?

Cost me about €15 for

12 pieces, and they only gave me one

drumstick. One drumstick, and the rest of

it was just bony pieces, lumps of bony

pieces for €15. Do you

know what I got from the supermarket? I

got 12 chicken drumsticks for just €4.

Can you believe— oh my God.

€4 and you get 12 drumsticks.

KFC, you pay €15 and you only get 1

drumstick and 11 bony bits of disgusting

leftovers. And I just put

it in the oven half an hour,

220 degrees, and it went crispy and

juicy.

Why do people even bother getting fast

food? €4.

Amazing.

And then I got 4 burger patties for about

€2. 4! That means it's 50 cents

per burger. Go to McDonald's,

you, you pay €4 just for one Big Mac, or

maybe 2 Big Macs.

I like the drumsticks, the legs,

thick juicy thighs, crispy.

You complain because you got one drumstick

amongst the rest of chicken being thighs.

What do you mean? It's not a lie. I got a

whole bucket. They only gave me one

drumstick and the rest of them were the

rib cages,

I think. Yeah, it was the rib cage

with the rib bones,

but there was only one of the drumstick

things.

How are the neighbors? They're annoying as

usual. Today wasn't too bad apart from the

kid that runs up and down for 2 hours.

Mila came over yesterday.

She went to the shop to get Coca-Cola. I

said If you're gonna go out, don't talk to

those people, because once you start

talking to them, they start developing or

thinking that they've developed some kind

of connection. And then, I don't know,

next day they'll be here knocking, asking

for sugar. I don't want any interaction

with them.

There's one of them who sits on the step

of the door playing a ukulele or

something, and he sings, and he's really

bad at it. It sounds like—

like that.

Sounds awful.

What kind of stupid singing is that?

Do do do do do do do

do do do do do do. My singing is better.

Who remembers when I went to karaoke in

Japan and I livestreamed it?

I only had about 20 viewers. I had about

40 viewers in the beginning, and then half

of them left when I started singing. I

went into that karaoke, remember?

I think it was 2017.

It's on my Twitch, actually. If you go

onto my Twitch, uh, all of the clips that

people used to clip from all those years

ago are still there.

Look, my fingers are so sticky.

I sung My Chemical Romance, I think.

I think I tried singing System of a Down.

I like karaoke. I used to like karaoke by

myself. I didn't like going with people.

Going with people is boring because you

have to sit there waiting for them to

finish singing. And then when you're

singing, no one's even listening. They're

all talking or they're just looking at the

tablet thing. Trying to think what they

want to sing. No one's paying any

attention to you.

My worst karaoke experience was when I

went to karaoke with a bunch of people

from the guest house, including the

manager who used to have sex with my

ex-girlfriend, the chlamydia girlfriend.

So it was weird, we had our dick in the

same hole. We went to karaoke,

and then at the time I was really into

K-pop and Korean, and I was just

constantly singing Korean songs, and I

thought I was really cool. And I,

because it was really late, it was about

1:00 AM. Half the people had already gone

home. 2 of them were just sleeping. The

other 2 were talking and the manager guy

was just sitting there and I was singing

in Korean nonstop. No one else was

singing. And then he just canceled my song

whilst I was pissed off.

I just got up and I left. I went back

home. I didn't pay.

I think he was drunk though.

He cancelled my song whilst I was singing.

Do you know, do you know how rude that is?

But now I feel kind of stupid because I

guess it was kind of annoying. No one

there's Korean, no one even knew what I

was singing, and I probably sounded really

bad. But at the time, I thought I was

really cool for being able to sing in

Korean.

I feel like such an idiot.

No one even cared that I knew how to sing

in Korean.

Isn't it strange? You think back when you

were younger, younger, and you remember

the things you used to think were cool. I

used to think being able to speak

different languages was really cool,

and I'd be really proud of my Japanese

skill and my Korean skill.

I thought it was the coolest thing in the

world,

but now I just find it annoying when

people show off. Like this one girl

could speak Korean and then she would be

on the phone in Korean and

then I could just tell, I bet she thinks

she's really cool.

It's just lame.

You can tell that they're so smug about

themselves because they think they're,

they're amazing because they can speak

some language.

But I used to be like that, and I cringe

at myself.

I used to go into these Japanese forums

and then feel better about myself

because my Japanese was better than

everyone else's.

Lame.

Look at those

perfect strips. Of pepper.

I just can't imagine ever learning a new

language again. Seems like a massive waste

I don't even want to ever speak Japanese

again. I think if I went to Japan again,

I would just speak in English all the

time. I wouldn't even try. I'd just be

like, thanks, can I have a bag, bitch?

No, I wouldn't say bitch. That'd be rude.

Can I have a fukuro,

please?

Can I have a risito in my baggo,

you fucko?

I hate the way everything ends in O in

Japanese. Risito.

Credit Tokado. It just makes sense.

So stupid.

Do you know how annoying it is having to

say bacon and lettuce hamburger in

Japanese?

It's the most frustrating thing.

Bacon, lettuce, tomato hamburger, please.

So I just point at the menu if I went to

Bacon, lettuce, tomato.

Hamburger. Oh my God,

sound like a spastic speaking like that.

Ruin the English language, why don't you?

Hamburger. But it's a hamburger

and a hamburger. Hambagu is just

the beef patty on its own, which Japanese

people eat for some reason. Isn't it

weird? You go to a restaurant and you can

have a hambagu and rice,

and it's just the beef burger without the

bread, without the buns, with rice. It's

so weird. Who eats just the beef burger

patty with rice? Japanese people do.

Sandwich.

I just started getting so lazy having to

say these English words.

It's weird because I went from being

really proud And really putting a lot of

effort into my pronunciation to getting

fed up and not caring anymore.

I don't know why that happened. I used to

be really proud. Japanese people say your

pronunciation is really good.

And I'd be like, oh, thank you.

I know,

I watched anime for 2 years. That's why my

pronunciation's so good.

Don't ever talk about Chris Broad in front

of me.

He's dead to me.

Traitor.

How come his rubbish videos get millions

of views and I don't?

Yeah, I wish Ben Dean and Chris Broad

would just meet up and fuck each other in

the anus whilst

thinking of me.

I guess one of my proudest achievements is

I got Ben Dean and Chris Broad to talk

about me on livestreams. I got

Chris to say, what's the beef between

Hiding My Room and Abroad in Japan? He

said, because we talked about meeting up

and I was really busy and I didn't, and

now he hates me. And then Ben Dean says

something like— I can't remember what Ben

Dean said actually. He said he used to

watch my channel when I was really small,

and then I started hating on him, and he

was like, come on dude, I used to

watch you back in the day and

then you started hating on me. Come on

dude. The way he said

it, which is so funny. He sounded so, I

don't know, disappointed. I don't know if

disappointed is a word. He was like, come

on, dude. Come on, man.

Don't call me dude.

I felt like, I don't know, I felt like a

child and my disappointed parent

was disappointed in me. Felt a bit bad.

I was only hating on him because people

kept bringing him up. I don't even know

how the whole thing started, the feud

between me and Bendine.

It's not even a feud.

I think people were just trolling me

saying Bendine makes better content, and

then I would get triggered.

I don't care anymore. I don't really see

myself as a YouTuber anymore. I feel like

I've grown out of it. I'm a stock trader

now, you know. YouTube's just my side

hustle. I feel like I've moved

on from the days where I wanted to be a

famous YouTuber. I feel like that's just

not going to happen now. In 2018, I

thought it was very possible. 2019, I

thought, uh, maybe it could still happen.

2020, I just thought, nope, it's not gonna

I can't believe 2 years ago I actually

thought I was gonna become a household

name like PewDiePie or something. I

thought I was gonna be massive. Hiding my

room, 1 million subs. How did this happen?

I used to think my content was great,

unique, funny, quirky. Everyone just hated

it and hated on me all the time.

They didn't see what I was trying to do.

I tried.

I gave it a good old bash.

Now my new dream is to become a stock

trader. My first dream was become

translator and then become YouTuber and

then become a porn star. And now my dream

is— my new dream is become a stock trader.

People complained about how I treated

people, but the videos of me treating

people badly always got really good views.

So I felt incentivized to treat

people badly and make drama out of

I don't really consider that I've— I don't

really accept that I've lost anything

on the stock market. Yeah, I bought high

and I sold low, but then I just reinvested

that money into different stocks that did

well. So I covered my loss and made

profit. So imagine I put $1,000 Amazon, I

lose $200. I take that $800 out, I put it

into NIO and I make $600. I haven't

lost it.

I don't count it as a loss. I'd only

count it as a loss if I put $1,000 into

something and then it went down and