Kick Livestreams/hey guy 2025-11-08 21_44 [fdf1a42c-hey-guy] 480p

But it's nice the chat's more active, I guess.

Like, this chat's fucking dead. Look at it, it's just nothing.

Where everyone tuning in from?

God.

Hmm.

Is anyone there?

Jesus.

Must have like 10 viewers.

Well,

this is going well.

Fucking dead fucking chat.

I'm still sick. At least my voice sounds more normal now.

God, I've got 7 hours of this. Jesus Christ. I might have to take a break in the middle.

Well, I think I gotta give this up and, I don't know, focus on making videos.

Even if I did 7 hours, that's $42.

I'm so broke now. I don't know what I'm gonna do.

The YouTube streams are making about $16 a stream.

That's $500 a month.

With a kick in YouTube, maybe I can make $1,400.

Oh God, I'm already fucked.

I really don't know what to do now.

I think it's over.

I can't believe it's just over like this.

Here we

go.

Oh, you got to text my girlfriend.

Yeah, so the YouTube streams are making like $16, $17 per stream.

Barely getting any donos. And then the thing is, even if you get donos, fucking YouTube takes 50% of it,

or 40%. It's insane. I barely get any donos in the first place and they take half of it.

So I think the most I can expect off YouTube is like £500 a month,

and Kick

maybe

£1,000 a month.

Maybe I could make like £1,400 a month.

I had the weirdest dream. All these big spiders the size of a mouse were coming out spinning webs. And the webs were really strong and I was like trying to hoover them up.

Not bad if you don't pay rent. Yeah, if I lived at home, $1,400 net income is pretty good.

Yeah, my car is fully charged, 100%. It says 202 miles. I better note that and then check next year how much it's gone down by.

Let's take a picture.

I turned off lane assist as well, because if you don't indicate and try and change lane, it pushes you back into your lane and you're like, whoa, it's like something taking over your car. It's weird.

So I'm not sure where to put my little blind spot mirror, because if I put it where I usually put it, it's going to cover up the blind spot detection light.

God damn, this is a dead chat.

So easy, so much easier to stream on YouTube because the chat is actually active.

I might be better off trying to focus on making videos.

Uh, 2 hours streaming on Kick makes $12.

But a video with

3K views makes $15.

We're really grasping at pennies here, aren't we?

What a fall from grace.

I reckon it takes way less effort to make a video as well than sitting here streaming for 7 hours.

I gotta rethink my whole life now.

Bum bum bum bum bum. Ah.

Where everyone tuning in from, guys?

But play some chivalry.

Oh God.

Da da da da da da. Ah.

Lost already.

Oh, hey, Mommy, where are you tuning in from?

I just started, yeah, gaming early because the chat is fucking dead. No one's saying anything. So I can't be fucking bothered. Fuck all you.

At least this way I get away with just saying I did, he did.

Escape from Forma.

I can't wait until market open. I'm gonna make so much money.

Come on, just start the game.

Get it.

Oh, I know.

I mean, making £5 an hour doing this, not too bad, is it? Could be worse.

Oh,

life could be worse.

Half of those prison carts have been emptied.

He dead.

He

dead. Whoa, I two-shot him.

What?

He killed his own guy. Damn, I'm doing good. Maybe not.

I'm doing good and then I die. That was funny.

Oh, I did a counter.

Oh.

Hit it,

hit it! Whoa,

just ducked that overhead.

What?

What? They have freedom! Retreat to the village! Yeah, well, I'm not streaming on YouTube all day. Defend the gates for the order! And YouTube streams aren't making much, making like $15,

and no one's donating.

So I gotta do something during the day. It's either gonna be making a video or doing a Kick stream

or a delivery job, but I'm too sick to do that.

I probably have better chances making a video.

Healing. Oh, why can't you interrupt that healing with a block?

I did. Beat

it.

I did.

He dead.

He dead. He dead.

I got an idea.

I pretend I'm moving to Japan because last time I pretended I was gonna move to Thailand, got 150 viewers. I'll just be like, yep, moving to Japan next week, guys.

Definitely true.

Might as well.

Nothing else to lose, is there?

Tonight's livestream title: Why I'm Moving to Japan Soon.

It's this fucking guy again.

That guy's so good, the long pompadour guy.

What do you mean? I did take a 2-week holiday back in March.

I did. I'm not dead. Oh, I am dead.

Oh, you mean a 2-week holiday abroad? I thought you meant a break for 2 weeks.

There's no point.

The shorter you are in a country, the more expensive it costs over time.

And I'm not Harold Boulder getting millions of views.

No, it's this guy again. This guy's good. Too good. Not good enough. Fuck you. Oh God.

Yeah, well, it's easy to afford stuff when you're getting 30K views a video. We try living off 2K, 3K views a video. It's not happening.

Damn,

I just don't want to go. I wasted money. I won't make money back. I don't want to go. I've got no one to meet. It's just a no, no, no, no all around. Not a single thing good about the idea.

Whoa, I hit all of them! 50, 50, 50

triple hit. It was like,

yeah, but I don't want to be in Japan. I just bought a new car. Why would I go to Japan? I just bought a new car. Obviously that means I want to be here.

Japan will be just as depressing because I don't know anyone. Life's depressing when you don't have any people nearby.

I don't know anyone in Japan apart from Bloodbuckler.

Everyone get the fuck out my way, fucking idiots!

Oh my God.

You can make new connections anywhere. Why does it have to be in Japan?

Anywhere there's people, you can make new connections.

Oh, be quiet, Mommy. Annoying.

How many times I've said I want to go to fucking Japan? Shut up. Yeah,

I'd rather have dead chat than you going, whoa, go Japan, fucking retard. Fuck off.

If I want to go to Japan, I'll fucking go to Japan.

I don't need you telling me to go to fucking Japan. Shut the fuck up, fucking idiot.

If I want to go, I'll fucking go, you dumb fucking idiot.

Oh God, you people are dumb fucking idiots. I hate you. Fuck off, dumb shits. Dumb fucking sacks of shit, you people are.

I'm in a bad mood because of you. It's got nothing to do with the car. You put me in a bad mood because you're fucking annoying.

The racing of us can deal.

The new car added a lot. I got £900 cashback. I got £500 Electrovers charging card. I got a car with slightly better range, newer, nicer looking,

cheaper insurance.

Oh, not the brown level. Fucking hell, I hate this level.

Asgandir is under attack! Tenosha rides to meet the enemy!

We must Fast defend our lighthouse and secure the port!

Why does it not have my weapon out?

I

hate this level.

How would it be me if I'm not even in Devon?

What kind of sex though? Was it like a woman? Or a torso.

Why not just— I don't understand why you ditch it in the woods though. Just cut it up and put it in bags and let the bin men take it. It's not like you have to hide it. It's not illegal to have the sex though. Oh, they put me back in the same map.

I just quit this map and they put me back into it.

This is around the time when I get really fed up with this game.

Oh, he dead. I dead.

So I think you guys want me to go back to Japan because,

um,

I was known for meeting Japanese women and talking about every little detail.

And it was always like an adventure, like, oh, we're meeting this new woman, this happened, that happened, and I would talk about every little thing.

But I'm not gonna do that. As you can see, I'm not doing it with my current girlfriend,

not because she's British. And it's like, oh, if she was Japanese, I would be spilling the beans on everything. It's because I changed. So I mean, even if I went to Japan and got a new girlfriend there, it would be exactly the same as what's happening now. I wouldn't talk about it. This is what you people don't

understand, is that it's not going to Japan that will magically make things interesting again is that I am not willing to overshare everything anymore because it gets me into more trouble than it's worth.

So even if I went to Japan, it would be just like what it's like now, but I'll be in Japan.

But for some reason you'll think, oh, if you go to Japan it will be all interesting because it'll be like how you were in 2018 again. No, it won't.

It's not 2018 anymore.

I don't operate like that anymore.

This is what people don't seem to be able to understand.

So you, you only— I mean, it's not boring for me, but boring for you because I'm not sharing every little thing that's happening.

I

mean, loads of stuff's happening. I'm just not telling you about it because it's none of your fucking business.

And if I, if I get found out that I shared like every little thing, yeah, maybe it wouldn't make any difference. Because I'm in too deep anyway. But I don't know, maybe it's worth holding back.

I'm not making content anymore, it's not worth it.

You can't make content about other people secretly or against their will and not expect any consequences. It's what I've learned.

It's too risky.

You're better off making content off inanimate objects like money, gaming, tech.

Found

it.

Yeah, it's unfortunate because people are the most interesting thing in life, and talking about people is fun,

but that's playing with fire.

This is why people make fictional stories.

I just— I don't want to make relationship content anymore.

So going to Japan's not going to make everything so amazing. I'll just be walking up and down empty streets being bored.

Get out of my fucking way!

I

did.

He dead.

I dead.

How'd he kill me in one hit?

I don't have enough viewers for them to increase my hourly. I'm getting less than 40 viewers average.

Hit it.

What?

All

right.

You're dead.

What?

He

dead.

I did. Oh, back hurts.

Oh.

Asked my mum to buy Strepsils.

Can you buy strepsils?

Lemon and honey.

I just ran into the fire. Oh my God.

Why do I keep dropping my weapon?

Why do I keep dropping it?

No, just straps or cough medicine.

I got fucking cold. What do you think I need? Any fucking cough medicine?

Protect the archives. Our knowledge must be preserved for future generations. Been coughing all week and she's like, what do you need? Uh, cough medicine maybe.

Oh, I keep sending voice messages.

I keep dropping my weapon for some reason.

You sent a voice message on me in the stream.

Do

not let them burn our library!

Defend the archives, everybody. Okay.

I did.

Whoa, stupid spinning chat! Why did it just suddenly spin so much?

Oh, my man left.

Oh, got him! Wow, look how big his sword is.

Whoa, whoa!

A ver.

Hit it.

Can't see who's who. Everyone looks the same. Look.

Beat

it.

He dead. Ah, why do

I always hit my own team? It's so easy to hit your own team, so hard to hit the enemy.

Yeah.

Lost again.

I saw that clip of Chicken Andy fighting that guy and I thought, these people are so dumb. They're making thousands of dollars a day and they're gonna risk it because they can't not fight.

They're gonna get banned at some point

when they're making like 20, 30k a month. Why would they risk that money? Because they want to fight.

So stupid.

As you well know, the strait at Lion's Spire has never been penetrated by any enemy vessel. This channel is littered with the bones of hundreds of ships who dared to sail through. Keep those trebuchets firing and add Malmrich's arrow

Kick pays them regardless. Uh, no, if they stream fighting each other, they're gonna get banned unless they get special treatment. I mean, I thought Sam Pepper had special treatment. Who's permanently banned?

A Baby Hayes guy got banned too for attacking someone.

Xena got banned for shooting a paintball gun at someone.

I can't get on the

ship.

He is on guard.

Whoa, I killed him!

I had come in, I killed one of them.

What?

2,500 damage.

Whoa, what was that?

My weapon. I got his weapon and I killed him with it.

I stole his weapon and threw it at him.

That was pretty funny.

Look, you can hit it on the tree. That's pretty cool, the way it sticks in the tree. That

was

funny.

Oh,

take

heed! A mason ram has reached the gate!

What?

I killed the chicken.

He dead.

No, the beacon's fallen! Fall back to the square, brothers! We must defend the town square!

You dead. Well, I hit him 3 times.

What? I dead.

What?

One-shot kill me.

I hate

the vote kit thing. Get it off my screen.

Right in the fire.

Oh God.

Oh.

Brothers, the town square is nearly lost.

You dead?

What? Square is lost.

Defend the gatehouse banners.

Keep our banners safe from the Getting bored of this.

You're dead.

What is blocking?

I'm dead. You dead? So.

Really, if I donate the bed and sofa, do I get tax deduction? I didn't know that.

Well, if I donate it to my mum.

I

did.

What?

God, I hate motorbikes. Why are they so damn loud?

Sounds like a damn lawnmower.

I don't know,

I'm not seeing any key catalysts to move out.

It's just like consolidating, waiting for news.

The defense of the Dreadnought just is terrible!

He

dead.

That.

The defense of the tribute ship is paramount.

I

did.

Secure

the

city.

I'm also— if I was gonna get a job, I don't want to get a job in Kent. People are so chabby here.

Uh,

I'm bored.

I don't think I'd bother getting a job if I moved back in here. I'll just carry on doing this and maybe do some Uber Eats.

It's just really annoying I can't do Uber Eats in Devon because it's so dead.

And I wanted to go all the way to Plymouth.

Vadran Khan stood and bled for us. Now he rests here in peace.

The heathen horde is at our holy gates! Protect Vadran's Tomb and the holy city of Galan Kor!

Overrun the city of Galencourt and desecrate Desmond's tomb. Patience. Capture the outer fortifications.

Oh, okay.

No, he didn't miss anything.

You missed me kill someone with my shield.

Keep pressing the wrong button.

Who's saying go to Japan? Mummy was,

and several other people.

I didn't know you could launch yourself.

The problem isn't really paying off debts, the problem is making money. Because you can always pay off all your debts and then you'll just get more debt.

Not worried about the debt, I'm worried about my income because I'll just get more debt.

Life's expensive.

Like, someone could give me 10K and then I pay off all my debt, and then in a few months' time I'll just have all new debt again. I need to figure out how to improve my income.

Fucking kick paying me $6 an hour.

He dead.

Hit

it.

A

bit.

Keep pressing T instead of R. Oh my God, fucking hell,

why do I keep pressing T?

Even if Japan increased my views, the expense expenses of going to Japan will destroy any

new gains. Wouldn't be worth it. You think living in Japan's free?

The plane ticket alone would wipe out any increasing gains, if there are any in, in the first place.

People think going to Japan

Yeah, stay there for 3 months and then what? Come back here, channel's dead again.

Whoa, stay there 3 months doing what? Sitting in Upper Hotel, £100 a night, eating konbini food,

end up blowing £3,000 a month, barely making much more than I'm making now.

And there's no guarantee loads of people will come back if I was just in

Japan. It's too risky,

and I don't even want to do it. If I wanted to do it and there was like a Japanese girl I wanted to meet, I'd do it and not worry about the cost and take the gamble. But that's not the case. I don't want to go Southeast Asia. I don't want to go anywhere. I don't know why

you think I want to go anywhere. I don't want to go anywhere.

Oh, he's dead.

What? I was blocking. I don't know why you guys think I love travel so much. I hate traveling. I don't like traveling.

I don't want to travel.

Ah,

I hate traveling. I don't care about other cultures. I don't care about other countries. I don't care about languages. I don't care about other food. I like my pot noodle and my bacon. I don't care.

And I don't even like Asian women anymore. So what's the point?

The only thing I like was women. Now I don't like them. Boring.

I don't know, I'm just not really into Asian women anymore. I'll see an Asian woman, I'm like No thanks, I'd rather have a white girlfriend.

Oh, then have you seen that girl with James May, Lucy Brown?

I keep thinking she looks like a white version of Chihiro.

What you think, agree or not?

Very similar kind of nose mouth area.

Need name? I just said the name. It just said it.

Oh my God, Lucy fucking Brown. I just said it.

That is the name of the girl, you dumb fuck. Lucy is a fucking girl's name. You think Lucy is a guy's name? What's wrong with you? What guys do you know called Lucy?

Jesus Christ,

I just said her name. Oh my God, just dreadful.

Okay, what— where's my button to throw the weapon?

I thought they were the enemy.

I thought that was the enemy team. I forgot I'm Mason. I can't figure out how to throw my weapon. It doesn't work anymore.

Oh, it's G. I thought it was R. Why did I think it was R?

Going to Asia is so expensive, it's so exhausting, it's so boring. There's nothing in it apart from, oh, I might get a bump in viewership.

For a couple months, and then I'm back here anyway.

I need to kill them.

The outer ward is ours. The city is now in reach.

Demolish their relics. Eat it. Superstition cannot defy the might of the Mason Order.

Oh,

hear that?

Hear that? Hear that? Oh, triple kill!

I just got triple kill.

I'll tell you my dream, guys.

Here's my dream.

I'm a pro trader with investments up thousands of pounds, and I got a little stone cottage with a fireplace, and I drive my car And I meet my girlfriend and I trade stocks.

I know you don't believe in me and I'm gonna fail, but that's my dream, guys.

Not bum fucking around in fucking Japan or Asia doing stupid streams.

Whoa.

What do you mean, how am I gonna drive my Tesla around in your faraway cottage? Number one, I don't have a Tesla or want a Tesla. Number two, I'm not gonna drive a car inside a house. Number three,

Why would the cottage being far away mean that I can't drive around? That makes no sense. I don't know what you mean.

I don't understand any of what you're saying.

How can I drive a Tesla inside a cottage?

What? And if it was far away, then that would give me even more reason to drive, because then I've got to drive to it.

I did.

Oh yeah,

well, I bought the bottom on that dip yesterday. With, um, 60 units of NASDAQ longs,

20x. That's definitely the bottom.

It's gonna be easy now, just buy and hold, buy and hold, don't trade.

I've got 3 NASDAQ longs. Right at that bottom.

Just hold that

into December. Account's going to be up thousands.

You know

what would be really cool? I got this idea when I was at the CEX shop and I was looking at all the computer parts in the window. How cool would it be if I could like buy up all the parts and build a computer and then sell it for profit.

Or maybe I make like a crypto miner,

I don't know, something cool like that.

Oh, I don't know, do something with tech. Like, I buy a thing, make a couple videos, and then sell it to CX and make a profit.

I hit

my team 3 times.

And missing the enemy completely.

Face it, enter the church and lay waste to hatred's tomb.

He dead.

Ah, coward snuck up on

He dead.

He dead. Oh, what? I hit him in the face. Oh, I got him with my punch. I punched him in the foot.

When's the next exciting tech coming out? It's just nothing coming out now.

Yeah, did it.

You dead. Oh,

the tomb of their beloved steward is nearly destroyed. Right in my face.

Oh shit, my mom is

She said dry or itchy cough. When is a cough ever not itchy?

I haven't updated my Amazon page since 2018. It's just not enough viewers to make it worth it.

Review cars. Could review my Citron.

Do not buy Citron C4s, rubbish.

Oh, my back.

The

raid on Aberfell.

Bye. Oh,

I feel so rough.

Commence the raid of Aberfell. Masons must pay for the desecration of Galencourt. Take the village, conquer the highlands, and destroy the heretics' ancient stones.

Half 1, might break for lunch. The Agathians are capturing Our laborers and livestock. They must be

stopped. He dead.

Oh, heavy cavalry sword.

Hit it,

hit it.

Hit it, hit

it.

Where are the

enemies?

Oh, something threw a head. Steal

the Mason supplies.

Don't let them capture our workers or the king.

Hey then.

Oh,

I got him.

Hold on, it had

I don't— I couldn't figure out how to link the US Amazon.

I don't think anyone bought from my merch store in ages.

I haven't checked.

Gypsy.

What?

My back hurts.

He

dead.

We have failed to protect the village. Go back to the tower.

Patience. This tower is our only remaining tall one. Defend it.

Hit it.

Wow.

Eat it.

He dead.

He dead. Damn, I'm doing good.

Look at that.

What?

I did.

I

wasn't even in the fire.

You will not soon forget me.

Oh, what? Didn't see that coming.

Do 15 minutes more, maybe have bacon and eggs, hash brown.

Did

I—

I hit him 3 times.

Oh,

I'm

getting bored.

I

think I'm done.

Oh,

sorry, boy.

My whole body is just uncomfortable.

It's not a case of my mum and Dave not wanting to be in the videos. They'd be happy to. It's me not wanting to film what I'm doing because the stupid fucking trolls

keep trying to meddle. Next they'll be phoning up the Wetherspoon and phoning up the arcade. And being like, an individual called Daniel Lord was at the arcade.

He has HIV and he put saliva on the gaming thing. I'm just so sick and tired of the trolls phoning up and like emailing places I go to trying to get me in trouble that I don't want to vlog anything anymore. I don't even want to talk about anything anymore.

I don't want to share anything or film anything.

So congrats, trolls. You made me not want to do this anymore because you're so annoying.

How'd they know the dealership? Because I said I was getting a Citroën, and I think there's only one Citroën dealership. And mates don't.

I just don't want to talk about anything anymore

or film anything. I'm just so— I just want to delete the whole fucking thing, to be honest.

Anything I film or talk about risks getting me in trouble.

This is what's really killed my channel.

I mean, anything, like even if I chop down a tree, next thing they're going to be reporting me to the council. Say, oh, he chopped down his tree without permission, then fucking council are going to be coming over.

Or something I don't even know is against rules, I do it on the camera, then I'm in trouble.

Even cleaning my car got me in— well, it didn't get me in any trouble really, but it nearly did.

I never would have thought streaming myself cleaning my car It could get me in trouble.

This never used to happen. I don't get why it happens a lot now. Like, when I was in Japan married, I filmed everything and I never got in trouble. Maybe because language barrier, like they couldn't phone them up and speak Japanese.

Now it's like every little thing I do somehow I get in trouble for.

So it's just sucked out all the fun out of doing this.

Well, I'm gonna go have lunch. See ya.