I hooked up with an American girl yesterday...

Hey, so there's something I need to

confess to you guys. I've been chatting to

Japanese girls on Tinder weeks before I

came to Japan because I kind of had a

feeling that the whole Tomoko thing wasn't

going to work out based on past

experiences. So I decided to make some

some Plan Bs, Plan Cs, Plan Ds, you know,

backup women that I can meet up with if

the whole Tomoko thing goes down the

drain, which, which it did. So a few weeks

before I came to Japan, I decided to

upgrade my Tinder account to Tinder Plus.

And when you upgrade to Tinder Plus, you

can change your location. So even if

you're not in Japan, you can change your

location to Japan or any city in Japan,

and you can start matching up with girls

in, in the location that you choose. So I

decided to pay for Tinder Plus and I

changed my location to Japan, and I was

talking to a lot of Japanese women weeks

before I came here. And now that I'm

single again, I guess it means that I

don't have to hold back. I can start

dating again. I can start meeting up with

these women that I've been chatting with,

and a few of them have expressed interest

in meeting up with me, and we've arranged

to meet up in the following weeks—

following days from now on. And I'm gonna

go on some dates with these women that

I've been chatting to, so that should be

interesting. Yesterday I met up with this

half-American, half-Japanese girl that I

met on Tinder, and we've actually been

talking for a few weeks, and we decided to

meet up for the first time yesterday.

And I know what you're thinking, isn't

that kind of fast? You just broke up with

Tomoko. And yeah, I guess it is kind of

fast, but I'm only here for a few months.

I don't have time to waste, and it's

already been 2 weeks, so I'm running out

of time. So I was talking to this

half-Japanese, half-American girl who

lives in Japan. She lives in Shikoku,

which is that island where Tomoko

also lives. Kind of a— what's the word—

coincidence. And she seemed nice. She

said— she said her— oh

my God, why do Japanese people love to

ride those boats so It makes so much

noise. I, I don't get it. What was I

saying? So, um, yeah, this half-Japanese,

half-American girl— her dad's actually

British and her mum's Japanese, and they

moved to America, so she was raised in

America. She comes from this place called

Maryland, which sounds kind of funny. It

sounds like a place full of Marys. And we

decided to meet up for the first time

yesterday. I was kind of excited about

this because I've never actually spoken to

an American girl before, and I've never

been on a date with a partially white girl

before. I looked at her photos on Tinder

and she looked extremely Asian. She didn't

look white at all. I could kind of tell

she was slightly mixed, but really she

looks very Asian. Not as Asian as a full

Asian person would, but fairly Asian. And

I thought to myself, maybe this is good,

you know, maybe I should take a break from

dating Japanese women. Maybe a Western

girl would be more suited to me. So she's

24, she was 150 centimeters tall,

so fairly short compared to me, and she

was kind of chubby, you know. She wasn't

really fat or super overweight, but she

was pretty chubby compared to Japanese

women. Why are there always so many cars?

You can come out at night, at any time at

night, 9 PM, 8 PM, 10 PM, 11 PM, there's

always cars. Why are there cars? Just go

home for fuck's sake.

So I met her yesterday. I keep saying

that, don't I? Yeah, we get it, we met

yesterday, okay? And we walked around for

a bit. She was very nice, kind of bland,

bit boring. She looked alright. Her face

was objectively fairly attractive, a lot

more attractive than Tomoko. She didn't

have a weird-looking face. She had nice

features. She was a bit overweight.

That was my only complaint. And we walked

around. We, we bought food at Family Mart,

then we went to a park and we ate and we

talked. And after we talked for a bit,

She asked me what I wanted to do, and I

said, can I be completely honest? And she

said, okay. And I said, I would really

like to go to a hotel with you. And she

said, okay. She said, are you sure? Do you

really want to go to a hotel? And I said,

yeah, but only if you want to. I'm not

going to force you to come to a hotel with

me. And we went to a hotel.

We found this hotel nearby. I went on to

Booking.com, I booked us a room, and we

checked in. We went into the room and we

had sex.

She asked me to put a condom on, so I said

okay, and I got a condom out of my bag and

I put it on. And everything was fine. We

had sex for about 8 to 10 minutes and it

felt really good. And then for some reason

I started to get bored and I started to

feel less sensitive down there. It started

to feel kind of numb, like I couldn't feel

anything, and I just lost my erection.

It started to get softer and softer.

So annoying. It started to get softer

and softer, and I couldn't get the

erection back. My erection just completely

went, and I tried everything. I tried

touching myself, I tried kissing her, I

tried touching her, but nothing was

working. I just— I completely lost

interest in having sex with her. There was

something about her that I didn't find

very interesting.

I didn't find her to be very attractive.

I think she's an attractive person, but I

didn't feel attracted to her. And I don't

know, maybe it was the condom. Because of

the condom, I felt like I couldn't feel

her when we were having sex. It just felt

like I was rubbing against a piece of

plastic. She asked me if I wanted to take

a break, so I said okay, and we just lied

in bed cuddling, kissing. For about 15 to

20 minutes and I still couldn't get an

erection. So I decided to take the condom

off and then the erection started to come

back again. And as soon as it started to

come back, I quickly put the condom back

on. But the moment I put the condom on,

the erection disappeared again and it went

soft again. It was so frustrating. This

was such a strange experience to me. I've

never I've never had this experience where

I'm having sex with a girl for the first

time and I lose interest in having sex

with her. That must have really hurt her

feelings, and I felt really bad about it.

I don't know what, what was the problem.

Maybe it was the condom, or maybe it was

because I didn't really feel very

attracted to her. But then not feeling

attracted to a girl has never really

stopped me from wanting to have sex with

her. It's been a

long time since I've had to use a condom.

I think the only girlfriend or partner

that I've had who was very insistent on me

using a condom was the ex-Korean

girlfriend. But even with her, even when I

had to use a condom with her, it never

went soft. It was always hard the whole

time. I had no problems with using a

condom with her. But for some reason

yesterday with the half-Japanese girl, I

just I don't know, maybe it was her.

Maybe I didn't feel very attracted to

something about her. I think there's

something about English as well. When she

spoke to me in English, it really turned

me off. There's something about the

Japanese language that I find really sexy.

Maybe there's something wrong with me.

She was also starting to get kind of

frustrated with this, and she said, she

said, don't worry about the condom. And

she let me have sex with her without the

condom, and it felt amazing. I instantly

got my erection back, and I didn't finish

inside of her. I did it outside on her

stomach. And this has made me a bit

worried. What if the next girl also asked

me to wear a condom and And I can't get an

erection because of the condom. I can't

keep having unprotected sex with all these

girls because something's gonna go wrong

sooner or later, and I don't really feel

like getting chlamydia again. That wasn't

a fun time. I'm not sure what to blame.

Was it— should I blame the condom? Maybe

the condom was too thick. Should I blame

the girl? Was I not attracted to her? If I

didn't really feel attracted to her, then

maybe I shouldn't have gone to a hotel

with her in the first place.

There was just nothing exciting about the

relationship between me and her. She was

24, younger than me. She was single. She

was attractive. There was nothing

exciting. For example, she wasn't married.

She wasn't older. She wasn't unattractive.

For some reason, I get turned on by, by

things like my partner being married, or

my partner being kind of ugly, or not

being in a relationship with the person

I'm having sex with. Turns me on, makes me

aroused. I need something, something

strange about the relationship between us

to, to get me aroused. If there's nothing,

like it's just a normal girl who's younger

than me who's single and there's nothing

wrong with her, then I feel like that's

kind of boring. That's bland. The strange

thing is, even though I was saying that

Tomoko isn't very pretty, we still ended

up having sex 3 times in the space of 4

hours. And I was in the hotel with the

half-Japanese girl for about the same

amount of time, and we only had sex once.

After we had sex once, I, I completely

lost interest in having sex with her. I

just lost interest and I couldn't get an

erection again. This isn't actually the

first time this has happened. I've lost my

erection during sex before when I was

having— when I was in a relationship with

that 2014 girlfriend in Japan. I

completely lost my erection during sex and

she wasn't happy about it. She started

crying. She started saying things like,

you don't like me anymore, you don't love

me anymore. I usually lose interest in sex

if I've been having too much sex, and

maybe the problem was— was I had sex a few

days before with Tomoko. Maybe that was

why I wasn't feeling very horny when

I was with the half-Japanese girl. Maybe

it wasn't her fault. Maybe it was like a

combination of things: the condom and

me having sex a few days before meeting

her. Shit. Anyway, I don't think I'm gonna

see her again. She wasn't very interesting

personality-wise. I thought she was kind

of bland. She lives too far away. I didn't

think she was physically attractive.

I didn't personally find her to be very

attractive, and I'm

pretty sure that was the most boring sex

I've ever had. It was the worst sex I've

ever had. I've never lost an erection

during sex whilst having sex with someone

for the first time. It was, it was really

shocking and surprising. And I have to

meet this other Japanese woman, she's 36,

this week. I actually met her before last

week. We went to karaoke with each other

and we ended up kissing in the karaoke,

but we didn't do anything. But this time

she asked me if I wanted to stay a night

with her at her place, and I said okay.

So maybe things will go better this time.