I'm going for Therapy next week...

Hi, so recently I've been doing a lot of

thinking about therapy, whether I need to

get some therapy, should I go and get some

therapy, and after a lot of thinking

I think I have come to the decision that

maybe getting some therapy could be

a good idea. Now I've always been against

the idea of getting therapy because Well,

I always thought of it as kind of like an

insult. If someone says to you, you need

to get help, go and see a therapist, it's

like they're saying you're broken, you

need to go and get fixed. And to be

honest, I've never really thought of

myself as broken. I always

think— well, I always thought that I

was normal and everyone else was a little

bit weird. I always thought that the way I

think and the things I do were completely

normal, and I didn't understand why

everyone else thought I was weird. And I

felt kind of hurt and insulted when so

many people kept saying that I needed to

get help. I saw it as kind of like an

attack, and I became defensive because,

you know, usually when you get attacked,

you become defensive because you want to

defend yourself against all of the

incoming attacks. But recently I've just

been trying to open my mind up a little

bit, and I've started to, you know,

analyze my life, and I've started

questioning myself. Why do so many things

keep going wrong in my life? Is it because

of outside influences, or is it because of

me? Is it because of what I'm doing and

what I'm thinking? Is it myself?

Am I the reason why things keep going

wrong? Am I sabotaging myself because of

the way I think? And maybe if I go and see

a therapist I'll be able to find the

answers to these questions.

And maybe I should have done this a long

time ago. Maybe if I did it last year or 2

years ago, I could have avoided so many

problems that I've had in my life, and

maybe I could have avoided hurting so many

people. So I've been talking to my sister

and she recommended me a really good

therapist that I will be going to next

week, and I'm not really sure what to

expect from it. I guess they're going to

ask me a load of questions and then I'll

just answer them and then they'll tell me,

uh, they'll give me steps that I could

take to fix things. I think the strange

thing is before I started doing YouTube,

I've always kind of lived in my own little

world, like my own little bubble, and I

always thought everything I was doing was

completely normal and made total sense.

And it was only until I started

broadcasting my thoughts and my life onto

the internet that I managed to get, um,

I managed to get other people's opinions.

And these opinions in, in most cases have

been pretty harsh. My family won't really

give me the same kind of feedback because

they're my family and they won't want to

be rude to me and they don't want to hurt

my feelings. So you can't really rely on

your family or friends to give you honest

feedback. I think one of the advantages to

the internet is people will give you their

honest opinions and feedback, and they

don't care if it hurts your feelings or

not because they're just strangers to you

and they're anonymous, and they'll just

tell you things as it is. And even though

that can be painful, because, you know,

sometimes, sometimes the truth hurts— that

is a phrase that makes sense— even though

it can be painful, um, what they're saying

can also be true. And I also think

that before I get into another

relationship, I really feel like I really,

I really need to get some kind of help to

avoid making the same problems, making the

same mistakes that I've made in the past.

Otherwise, if I don't, if I just carry on

going on like this, then if I get into

another relationship, it's just going to

you know, be another disaster because

maybe I haven't really changed that much.

So yeah, I am feeling pretty nervous about

it, but at the same time, I'm also kind of

excited to, to find some answers, to get

some help, and, you know, get some

solutions to, um, help find

out why I have such a hard time achieving

what I want to achieve. In life.

And I also wanted to apologize to anyone

who, who did suggest to me that I should

get therapy or get help. And if I snapped

at you and got angry at you and I called

you names and told you shut up, then I

guess I do owe you an apology. Although

you're probably not watching anymore

because you probably hate me now. I'm

sorry. I just— I guess I was childish and

immature and it hurt my feelings when

people said that I needed to get help

because I didn't really think I needed to

get help. I thought I was fine. I thought

I was a perfectly normal human being, but

I guess according to everyone's opinions,

I guess I'm not really that normal and

maybe I do need help. So yeah, that's all

I had to say. See you next time.

Hello and welcome back to the first

episode of Cooking with Daniel in my new

Airbnb. Hopefully if I just show this

counter, it won't give away my location.

So today I'm gonna make pasta with

some bacon bits and frozen peas, and I've

got this bolognese sauce.

I'm not sure if there's meat in here. I

can't believe how cheap all this food was.

I got more as well. I got some rice and

eggs in the fridge, and I got some other

stuff, and it didn't even cost me more—

any more than €20. And this is going to

last me for about 2 days, probably more.

So that's pretty good. Look at all of the

cooking equipment that came with the

kitchen. Plenty of pots and pans.

So I need a frying pan for the bacon and

then boil the pasta in the pot.

Ugh, these are left-handed scissors.

Look, the way the handle's shaped. If you

try and use your right hand, it feels

really uncomfortable. It's shaped for your

left hand. Who the hell uses their left

hand?

I think it's turned on. Yep, it's getting

warm. That's good.

Sorry if I'm moaning. Too much. I can't

stop complaining about everything. So next

we put in the bacon like this.

I think that'll be enough.

Bacon's looking nice. Okay,

pasta finished cooking, so now we can

scoop it out. Using your strainer,

put it into the frying pan,

and then get your bolognese sauce and put

it on top like this.

And then we have to mix it around.

It's a bit hard to do with one hand,

so I'll put down the camera. And that is

my special pasta recipe, looking very

nice. So hopefully this tastes pretty

good. This is my first— actually, I think

this is the first time I've cooked pasta

since I left Japan. Remember, I used to

cook a lot of pasta back in Japan,

and then people always used to moan

because I snapped the spaghetti in half.

People moan about everything, don't they?

On my new video, someone's moaning because

I sat on the floor to eat my McDonald's.

He said I can't stand people

who sit on the floor and eat. Yeah, well,

my legs were tired and I wanted to sit

down to eat my meal. I don't care if you

think it's annoying.

Hmm,

I think the bacon is a bit too salty and

a bit too overcooked. It's a bit hard.

Maybe the bacon was unnecessary,

but I would rate this meal 6.5

out of 10. I think it's very tasty.

Maybe some fried mushrooms would improve

the flavor.

Hmm, yeah, I think that was pretty good.

Pretty good cooking session.

Finally, a decent meal. I've just

been eating sandwiches and cold pasta from

supermarkets the last 3 days because I was

in that tiny hotel and there was no