looking for new japanese wife in Japan [FlGnQ8sJBKU]

Okay, I need to go and get my laundry.

Got my

laundry.

It's still a bit wet.

Mmm, clean.

It's still wet.

It's a little bit wet.

Ginny is in Japan. Sniper, go all

the way to Nagoya.

Damn thing's

wet.

When are you meeting Venus? I'm not

meeting anyone. Can't be bothered.

Girlfriend's coming. I don't have time to

be meeting people.

I guess I'll just

leave all this here.

Venus just seems like a time waster.

Like, she'll say one thing one moment,

and then next moment she'll change her

Seeing girls like her Many times.

Seen plenty of girls like Venus. They're

like, oh yeah, let's have sex, and then

you come and then they don't show up.

They just waste your time.

Okay, laundry done. Got a little hot

chocolate too. Bet you're jealous she

found out about HPV. Really? Ah, who told

her? Now girls don't want

to suck my ding dong.

Stupid Thai girlfriend doxxed my diseases.

When she coming? She coming sometime

next week. Secret day.

Don't tell Chihiro.

She'll be so jealous that I'm with a

younger woman. 5 years younger than

Chihiro. That is how you upgrade.

I'm basically just like Leonardo DiCaprio.

I upgrade my woman every few weeks— years.

Well, 37 is better than 42, isn't it?

Would you rather date a 42-year-old or a

37-year-old?

Yeah, I won't be able to stream, but I'll

be making vlogs.

Going to hit up the tourist

places in Kansai area. Where's my

girlfriend?

I've got my next girlfriend lined up.

She's Korean and 35. I'm gonna take

her out this weekend.

Take her out, take her up the bum.

She said it's raining all day, no cycling

today. Yep.

I might— I think—

yep, rainy day, perfect to stay in my

room with you for sex all day. Rainy days

are the best for just lying around having

sex.

Maybe I'll just walk

today. Haha.

Are you staying inside all

day? Are you staying inside today?

I invited her to a restaurant. She said

sure. What is my ethnicity?

I am half white and half Chinese.

Well, half Malaysian, but I don't have

Malay blood. I have half Chinese blood.

The cost of my bike, $68.

I haven't had to use the trains once since

I came, so I probably saved a lot of

money. But I had to pay ¥500 a night

to store my bike at this hotel, which is a

Milk cocoa.

I always get confused, should I say I'm

half Chinese or half Malaysian? Because I

don't look Malaysian. Malays have very

brown skin. They look more like ethnic

Thai people. My girlfriend

doesn't look ethnic Thai because she's

half Chinese, half Thai.

None of my Malaysian family are actually

ethnic Malay because my grandparents in

Malaysia were Chinese.

Although one auntie married an ethnic

Malay man and converted to Muslimanity,

so I've got some half-Malay,

half-Chinese cousins or nephews.

I guess it's a nephew.

I think the Muslims in my Malaysian family

now outnumber the Chinese. Because my

auntie had 5 children,

and then each of those 5 children have now

got 2 or 3 children of their own,

and they're all Muslim because they have

to stay Muslim.

So my one auntie created

like 30 Muslims through her grandchildren,

through her children and then

grandchildren, whilst the Chinese

uncles and aunties only had about 2 or 3

kids each, which I think a couple of them

have 1 or 2 children.

Muslims have big families. They have like

8 kids and 5 kids. 5 kids is not a lot

for a Muslim family.

Mm, that's pretty good hot chocolate.

I give it 6.2 out of 10.

I remember you playing with your mum's

cat. That's my sister's cat. I miss it.

It's very fluffy and cute. It fell asleep

in my arms with the fireplace going,

watching TV. It's so relaxing.

Are you in Japan by yourself? Yep,

I couldn't find a new girlfriend quickly

enough. Chihiro didn't

want to meet up.

Maybe if I met Chihiro on stream, get 200

viewers again.

200 fucking people lost interest.

I had 40,000 people hooked on what me and

Chihiro were gonna do next, and now they

just don't care anymore.

So sad.

Oh wow.

Well, I guess we go out in a few minutes,

just walk around. It's raining too much to

cycle. I could buy an umbrella.

Someone coming

It's so embarrassing if someone walks past

on the balcony thing.

He's still here. Well, you missed when I

went to get a burger. Too bad.

And you missed me buying the hot

chocolate. Bet you're gutted now.

Must be boring working in the hotel, just

changing the rooms every day.

Hundreds of rooms. I worked in a hotel

before. Changing the bedsheets is

so frustrating because it's big and it's

hard to handle. You've got to like pull

out the duvet from the sheets, then you've

got to flap it Shove in the new— the old,

I mean, shove in the duvet into the new

bed sheet, make sure the corners reach the

corners, and then flap it.

Change the pillow sheets, the bed sheets,

the duvet, vacuum it, clean the bathroom.

I only worked in a small hotel, but I

Maybe you get a good workout on your

forearms from all that flapping.

I'm having stomach problems. I might need

the toilet again.

Is it nerve-wracking to move to another

country? Leaving family must be tough.

Not really. I'm not very close to my

Instant noodles in Japan mostly taste

bland, boring, and uninspired.

They don't have anything even close to Pot

Noodle. They've got Cup Noodle, but they

don't have any good flavors. They don't

have any beef and tomato, chicken and

mushroom. They have miso

flavor, seafood flavor, curry flavor.

What's the Japanese driving test like?

They take you out on the road and then you

have to— do you have to do like mirror,

signal, maneuver?

And then before you move off, you've got

to do a 6-point observation check.

Yesterday I was attacked. This wasn't your

common comic book bad guy. In fact, not

even the Joker could compare to its evil

New Expert Review Zone episode. There's no

games out. I'm waiting for the new Zelda

coming out next month.

Problem is

I need to buy the game.

I don't really want to buy it. I could

just watch some footage and try and,

try and make up some kind of criticism.

2 written tests and 2 driving tests.

What? I thought the UK had a strict

driving test.

Japanese pot noodle is just a bit bland,

and they don't have meaty flavors here.

They have miso flavor, curry flavor,

seafood flavor.

Pot noodle has very meaty flavors.

They're cleaning the room. So noisy now.

Maybe we go out.

Did you meet a lady yesterday?

No. Why?

Yeah, I'm gonna meet a Korean lady soon.

Oh yeah, the Streamlabs bot thing's not

working. Why is that? I'm gonna try and

fix it.

Well, well, well, Cloud Bot time.

It's Huh,

that's weird. Streamlabs got removed as a

moderator.

I guess I have to add it back as a

moderator.

What's the difference between a managing

moderator and a standard moderator?

Okay, it should work now.

Why doesn't your sub count grow? Because

none of my videos go viral anymore.

Every time I post a stream, I lose subs.

None of my current content is good enough

to catch people's attention and get them

to be interested. The only way I can get

views now is by pissing people off, like

the PewDiePie video, and that's not going

to grow the channel.

And why doesn't Ice Poseidon's channel

grow? Why doesn't anyone's dead channel

grow? Because they kind of lost

the ability to make what made them great

in the first place. It's like the British

Empire. Why can't the British— and why

can't the British conquer the world again

like they did a couple hundred years ago?

Because they've lost the ability to.

Time passes, things change.

I haven't really made quality content

since probably 2020, and nothing in 2021

was good content. 2020 was good content

with Mila and stuff, but after

that nothing interesting happened,

so there's no way to grow the channel.

The channel peaked. Now it's

just like the

more you post, the more you lose, but you

have to post because you can't stop making

stuff.

I can't recreate what made the channel

great back then. Something is just lost.

A lot of people said stuff like the magic

is gone. Stuff like that.

Yeah, I guess it has.

This might be the worst day it has been.

Yeah, it's pretty bad. Even in Manchester

when I did boring live streams in my

apartment I would get a couple hundred

viewers and they would get about 10K

views.

People don't like the fake storylines.

Well, the fake storylines were the only

thing that got the best views. That's why

people would refer to the channel as like

an anime, because I created storylines.

Well, that's what YouTube is like. It's

either be fake Or be real at the risk of

being boring. And being fake

definitely works best, but I'm just tired

of being fake. I don't really want to

create a new video series

based off nothing.

Nothing's going on. I'm in Japan, not

really meeting anyone, just waiting for my

girlfriend to come.

Yeah, people wonder if I'm trolling or

not, and then they— when they realize I am

trolling, they lose interest.

Meet up with slightly homeless. I don't

Without the fake stories and the fake

drama, they would have left long ago

because there was nothing happening. I saw

the views plummet. After there was no

drama with Chihiro and it was just like me

in Japan married, the views went down by

like 60%.

There's nothing

in the videos that could— that was good

enough to keep people coming back without

drama. I had insane pressure

on me to keep people entertained, and the

only way to do that was by having drama.

So I still think I did what was best.

No, Thai girlfriend hasn't ghosted me.

She's, she's fine now.

You always imagine the way to success is

dishonesty. Well, that's what works for

Well, look at my recent streams. None of

it's been dishonest. And look how— look at

the view count. It's shit.

Watch what happens when I'm honest.

I don't really mind because the streams

still make more money than any video I

I haven't done drama since 2021.

No, I haven't had drama since like 2020.

And look what happened. That's why the

channel died. Why do you think the channel

died? Because there was no more drama.

Not because there was drama. Drama didn't

kill the channel. It was lack of drama

that killed the channel.

People got bored.

No, the initial disarming honesty is not

what made the channel blow up. What made

the channel blow up were the fake trolling

videos like Not Having Friends

and Why I Hate Japan. That's what blew the

channel up.

It was like the act and

the performance is what blew the channel

Yeah, it's an act. I rehearsed lines.

I created a script in my mind to

exaggerate something that was true,

but to make it weird. Like, I had to

exaggerate it and think how I can make it

as weird as possible to get people

interested in it.

How is it trolling or an act when it

closely reflects your reality? Because

it's like the way I'm speaking, I was

acting. That's not how I usually speak.

So sitting in front of a camera and, um,

performing an act.

It's like,

hello guys, welcome back to a new video.

Today I want to talk about why I have no

friends, and that's mainly because I only

really want to have sex with women. Okay,

there's truth behind it, but it's like an

act.

And I'm emphasizing the weird parts of it.

If you saw me make a video, you'll see how

it's knacked. So I'm like sitting there

repeating lines, trying to tweak the

delivery of sentences.

No, I don't have friends.

And the reason why I don't have friends is

Pretty close to what I say in the video.

I just don't really enjoy people's company

much. I get bored. I find most people

boring. And annoying. I get annoyed

with people very easily. I hate people

asking me for favors too. Oh, can you help

me do this? No, I can't be bothered.

Like, the Why I Hate Living in Japan video

was a troll video because number one,

I don't hate living in Japan. Number two,

I don't really care that much about the

things I complained about. I honestly

don't care that much that the bacon is

different or they don't have pot noodle.

There were just some fun things to nitpick

But I just— I got bored of doing the whole

act thing. I still do it, and I force

myself to do it when I make a video

because I have to, like the PewDiePie

video. But I hate doing it. I used to like

it. It used to be like a creative outlet.

I used to practice my acting and try and

come up with a funny script. But now I

hate doing it. I'm like, hey guys,

welcome back to the video. So recently It

still works. That's the annoying thing.

212K views now. That stupid PewDiePie

video got— I have to act and

be as weird as I can to get people to be

like, what the fuck is this guy? Is he

real?

When's a new arc coming? I don't know.

This is the new arc. It's the Japan arc.

The next arc would be Thai girlfriend in

Japan with Daniel.

The bicycle arc.

Yeah,

the IRL arc.

I think the main people that hooked people

I mean, the main thing that hooked people

were the titles. Like, I got— I'm sad and

lonely. I got back with my wife. I cheated

on my wife. My wife kicked me out. I'm sad

and depressed again. It was like that

funny string of video titles that got

people's attention.

I think I was pretty good at doing that.

It's just like nonstop flip-flopping

between two things, and then doing

something dumb, and then saying you regret

doing it, and then doing it again.

That's what the entertainment factor was

from.

So if I was going to do that now, it'd be

like, oh, I'm so sick and tired of my

girlfriend. And then, oh my God, my

girlfriend dumped me. I miss my

girlfriend. And then, yay, my girlfriend's

coming to Japan. And then next, why I hate

my girlfriend. That's what I would have

done back then.

And then, my girlfriend left. I'm sad and

lonely. Why I'm going back to Thailand.

And then I'll go back and then it'll be,

why I regret coming back to Thailand. I'm

so bored. I miss Japan. That's what the

magic was in. It was just that stupid

non-stop stupid decision after stupid

I think that's what made the channel fun.

Short, easy to consume, 10-minute video.

Have a dumb title like, oh, I'm so sad,

oh, I regret this, regret that.

Bit of vlogging at the end, last 4

minutes.

You got progressively worse. Yeah, well,

I had to keep— I had to keep escalating

things to

keep it interesting.

I think maybe people saw the pattern after

a while, and then it— the pattern became

less effective. At first, the pattern was

really effective because it was like,

wham, I just did this really dumb thing,

what do you think about it? And then after

doing it 100 times, the effectiveness of

it wears off and people get tired of it.

They can see what's going on.

Oh, he's just doing dumb stuff for views.

None of this is real.

Well, it's real. It's just— I don't know.

I don't know if I do dumb stuff for views

or if I do dumb stuff anyway, regardless.

Is it still raining?

I can't tell.

Well, as fun as it is trying to debate the

downfall of the channel, it's also a

massive waste of time.

I also kind of became numb to things.

When I was younger, I could make a

20-minute video about my feelings and

thoughts about a new experience.

But now I'm older,

things that happen to me don't really have

a very big impression on my mind. It's

just like, oh, okay, I'm not really gonna

make a 20-minute monologue dramatic

cinematic video diary about—

I don't know, I guess I could have done

like a 20-minute video about coming back

to Japan and how it's not the same.

Without Chihiro, I didn't know what I had.

Now I'm back here without Chihiro, I

realize I lost something really big. I

would make it all dramatic and emo like

Being all emotional really helped as well,

cuz like one tiny little thing happened

and then I would create some really long

video explaining my emotions.

Remember I did, uh, why I'm fed up of

Japan or something, or my obsession with

Japan is over? 30 minutes of

me just rambling about how I used to love

Japan so much but now the magic is worn

off. I could not do that now.

I don't know how I could talk for 30

minutes. About something so mundane.

Well, I don't know what other plot points

could have added to the series. There was

Dating, marriage, cheating, divorce. The

only thing that's missing is pregnancy and

babies. We've had basically everything

apart from gay stuff. I mean,

look at Peep Show. Beginning of Peep Show

just seemed like 2 normal guys living in

London. One's trying to get a job, one's

trying to help out his friend. But then as

the series went on, it got progressively

more and more crazy. Jeremy ends up

becoming a gay life

coach counselor person. Mark has a kid

with a woman he doesn't love. All this

crazy— it gets crazier, and they end up

exploring nearly everything. There's

drugs, there's drinking, there's cheating,

affairs, Mark nearly getting married,

having a baby, Jeremy becoming gay.

After you've done everything, what do you

do? There's nothing left to do with the

characters and stuff.

That's why I thought leaving Chihiro would

be a good idea because I felt like I

exhausted the possible plot lines

that could happen with Chihiro because we

did everything. There's marriage, dating,

breakup, get back together, cheating,

fighting, get back together, happy times,

family Christmases.

I took a lot of inspiration from Peep Show

with like the 2 dumb characters making

dumb life decisions and then regretting

them. That's basically the motto of my

Peep Show was great. That's one of my

favorite sitcoms. Actually, I think

it was— it is my favorite sitcom. It was

so damn good. Me and Mila watched the

whole thing. I watched

it before, but I think I watched it when I

was a kid and didn't really appreciate it

until I watched it again with Mila.

Oh, I broke my elastic band.

You're not actually going to a bar in 5

days? Well, not at this rate.

What a shame I didn't have to go to the

bar. Oh,

why are you afraid now? I'm afraid to get

wet in the rain.

Did I block Tiger? No. I booked

us a romantic getaway in

the mountains of Osaka.

You are Jeremy? Yeah, I guess

I'm more like Jeremy than Mark because

Jeremy also tried to avoid getting a job

and tried all these crazy

schemes to make money and then ended up

becoming gay. And he was having like an

affair with this married couple and he was

having gay sex with the husband and then

having sex with the wife too. And then

giving them both life advice, life

coaching.

But then I'm also a bit like Mark because

Mark is like always on this quest to find

the one true love of his life. And then he

says stuff like, having to do things you

hate is what is the price you pay to—

is the sacrifice you have to make to avoid

loneliness. He would say all this very

insidy stuff.

Oh,

he never said that. Yeah, he did.

Who's at a playground or some kind of

amusement park with— who's that woman he

had a baby with?

Sophie. And then he says, doing things

you hate is— is that— I

can't remember exactly what he said.

Something like that.

Get some

water.

If the Korean girl says, I'm staying

inside all day, I should say, I wish I

could join you. I should try and add tiny,

like 10% flirtation, see how she reacts to

it.

I don't really want to go on the date, to

be honest. Should I just ruin my chances

and say something weird like, can I stay

at your place? What if I say, if we meet

and we get on well, can I come to your

place? I don't really want to go on this

stupid fucking date.

Oh, Steve Jones sent me a message saying

he's upset because I banned him. I guess I

can unban Steve Jones. Not sure if he's

here since he's— he was nice to

message me about it.

I thought he was like a weird Reddit troll

hater.

Where's Steve Jones?

It looks like that John T guy finally gave

up. Thank God, he was so irritating. I

think I must have banned John T like 100

times. He just kept making more and more

profiles.

Oh, there's Steve Jones. My mum's on the

ban list too. Okay, Steve Jones unbanned.

Is it still raining? I want to go outside.

Oh my God, it's still raining. Daniel,

what age would you ideally like to live

Oh, thanks, Yuhang. What age would you

like to live to? Uh,

150. I want to see what happens in the

year 2200.

Why can't I go out here?

Says for emergency use.

非常の場合はカバーを外し。 What

cover? Oh, this cover.

Go on the balcony.

Get an umbrella. Oh,

put one umbrella.

Oh, raining until 7 o'clock.

Yeah, I got my— I got my laundry.

Guess we could go out.

Have you been playing video games? Nope,

not really.

Go to Den Den Town or something?

Okay,

I guess we could for

a few hours.

No, I'm not unbanning my mum. She keeps

leaving stupid comments like, oh yes,

it's very hard having a son like Daniel.

He always takes for granted me, me, me.

But I love him so much because he is my

only son. And then people say,

oh, you're such a great mother.

It's a load of bullshit, all of it.

Is it cold outside? I feel hot inside.

Let me switch over to pocket Wi-Fi.

Oh, thanks, blood.

Cheer up, the world awaits you. This is

your Osaka mummy. Cheer up, Daniel, the

world awaits you.

Just go for a walk, get some fresh air.

Then I have to come back and pack my bag.

Might get

a mint, a smint.

Hair looking

good.

It's a lot of rain.

Going down.

Going down.

I thought the show was coming on.

It said feel free to

Ah,

it's cold.

I don't

like it.

Cold and windy.

That's nice. I had a free umbrella.

Just one left for me.

Lucky boy.

Feels weird walking,

not cycling. I feel like

a pedestrian peasant again.

Don't come to my house. I don't even know

where your house is.

Yeah, I'll walk this way then. I'm cold.

Let me roll down my trousers.

Too cold for fashion.

My sexy ankles. Put them away.

It's so raining.

Hey, you're too close. Really?

I apologize.

Feet are getting wet, all these puddles.

Umbrellas keep knocking other people's

Looks depressing there. Yeah, it feels

depressing. My hand hurts

from holding the umbrella.

Those kids do what I do. Mimicking the

traffic sound.

Uh, the weather kind of reminds me of the

UK, I guess.

Just rain.

Oh look, it's the camera shop.

Do you remember the camera shop?

Standing in front of it trying to tell my

camera on the— is it the second day?

Yeah, the second day. Oh, we can go into a

short tenggai place.

I had to turn on the SIM card. Signal's

weak here.

I really need that SIM card.

Not really hungry, just had a burger.

I think I'd rather go back in the rain

than be surrounded by crowds of people.

There's too many people, hard to talk.

Ramblak ASMR rain walking.

1 million views.

I'm gonna have different kinds of leg

pains from walking, like feet

pain. You don't really get feet pain when

you're cycling. You can get it from

walking.

A Peugeot. Peugeot 306.

I used to want those. I wanted an electric

one. They look pretty nice.

I hate the pain in the sole of your foot

when you walk a lot.

Wow, the roads are like a mirror. Look at

the roads, it's reflecting everything.

I'm not 5'8, I'm 5'9.

Well, 5'8.8 then, but I round it up

to 5'9, because when I put my shoes on,

I'm basically 5'9. Without shoes,

5'8.8.

Oh my God, guys, Chihiro just kicked me

out because I talked to another woman.

Can you believe it? How could she do this

to me? Kick me out in the middle of a

typhoon? Now I'm

lost,

hunted by the Hong Kong guy.

It's funny how humans place so much

importance on how high, how tall you are,

as if it actually matters.

It literally matters Nothing at all.

You can be a 5-foot-1 midget and still be

Napoleon, unless you're

a basketball player or you pick fruit.

It's so meaningless.

So then society Looks

up to tall people so much.

Can you imagine being 6'4 in a Japanese

apartment? I'm only 5'9 and I feel like

the toilets are very tiny. Keep banging my

elbow on stuff. Oh, thanks,

Gerber. I find

the toilet units here, so small,

having to duck my head down. Imagine being

over 6 foot.

You wouldn't even fit in the bathtub.

And then getting on a plane, you must have

such cramped legs the whole time.

Time. I think 5'10 or 11 is a great

height. Over 6 foot is too much.

Now my feet are going to get soaked.

Huh,

a bridge. I hope I don't accidentally walk

into Tobito Shinchi.

Oh no, my hand

hurts.

Switch hands. Okay,

let's go.

I'm just a pedestrian.

Oh my God, my foot is soaked.

Socks are soaked

heel to toe. Oh,

I'm tired already.

Walking is hard work compared to cycling.

Back to the Showtime guy. No,

too many people. I need to pee.

This rain is making me want to pee.

Stupid cyclist.

Wow,

man.

There's a shrine. Go to the shrine.

Switch hands. The right hand is blocking

the camera. This one's better.

I need to find a convenience store. I need

I'm not going anywhere. I'm just having

a walk.

Kill some time, then go back to a hotel.

I've got to pack my bag.

Wow, what a miserable day.

Jesus.

Next hotel, I'm staying at another slum

hotel. It's,

uh, £25 a night.

I wish people would stop saying they dox

me if I'm actually just showing you where

I'm staying.

You can't claim to have doxed me if I

literally told you where I'm staying.

Stop trying to take credit when

you don't I want

to go over there, but I need to pee.

What should they say? They don't need to

say anything. Just say,

oh look, Daniel's staring at the blah blah

blah.

Can we go on a date? Are you a lady?

Slim, cute girl?

Then maybe.

I can't see any konbinis.

I want to go into that shrine. Maybe

there's a toilet in the shrine. Goddamn

small bladder. I've been out

for 10 minutes. Let me just Google where

the konbini is. Oh my God,

wind's blowing.

Oh, stupid permission settings.

Convenience store.

Oh my God, I just walked past one.

Really?

It's a

Family Mart. Ah,

windy.

Oh, the wind is blowing up my shirt.

Should have worn 2 shirts.

Oh, thanks Steve Jones. Sorry I

banned you. I thought you were one of

those Reddit hater people.

I need to pee so bad. Oh my God,

needing to pee is the worst feeling ever.

Oh, where is it?

It's freezing.

I'm only wearing one shirt as well and one

jacket.

Got 2 trousers on, so my legs are fine.

My stomach is cold now.

Oh,

I need to run. I'm gonna actual—

actually piss myself.

Oh my God, running makes it worse.

Think of a dry desert, dry sandy desert,

dry sandy desert, dry sandy desert,

dry Sandy desert. Um,

where is it? Oh, there it is. Dry sandy

desert. Dry sandy desert.

Dry sandy.

Dry sandy desert.

Dry and sandy.

Fuck's sake, why is walking so slow?

Please have a toilet, please have a

toilet, please have a toilet, please have

a toilet.

I don't think they have a toilet.

Okay.

Thank God. Thank God

for convenience stores.

Convenience stores are such lifesavers,

mainly for the toilet. I don't care what

they sell, I just want the toilet.

Okay, back on our quest to

find a new waifu. I feel so

much better now. I can enjoy my walk.

No, I haven't found a wife yet. 9 days of

the stream. I'm pretty sure it's like 13

days. I came on the 26th,

so it's been 12 or 13 days.

I thought streaming 24/7 every day would

be really tough. It's not really.

Oh, look at that hotel. It says Pier. Ito

Pier. Can you see it?

Oh, it's green,

green.

Wow. This looks nice. Why does Complaining

Channel hate me? Thought he liked me.

Oh, 9 days more on the timer. I thought

you meant 9 days since I started.

I'm not going back to the hotel yet. I

want to go to the shrine.

I see people going in there, so it should

Uh, what? It's not open.

All the gates are shut. Is it closed?

Ikutama Shrine closed.

Oh my God, it closes

at 4:00 PM.

Ah, it's 4:26

now. Damn it,

missed it by 20 minutes.

Why are they closed so early?

To do what?

I guess the monks go home or something.

Could sneak in. Sneaking into Japanese

shrine like a ninja.

Looks like Sekiro Temple. Yeah,

I have this urge to jump up onto the roof

and run across it.

Imagine jumping onto the ledge gripping it

and pulling yourself up. That would take

so much energy. I don't think I'd be able

Maybe we can stand here and look inside.

Wow,

it's like someone's house.

How do the shrines even make money?

Pretty sure no one pays.

Some people pay for the fortune telling.

Or maybe they put a donation,

some coins.

Not bad.

Boom.

Um, yeah, I was saying that streaming

every day is not really hard,

probably because I don't do anything.

I'm not really doing anything hard,

that's why.

Well, I don't know, biking every day for

10 hours seems pretty hard.

It's physically hard but not mentally

hard.

I don't mind a bit of physical pain, but I

don't like mental pain. Mental pain

including being shouted at,

awkward situations, and socializing.

I'll take physical pain like leg pain

pain over that any day.

Well, at least my shoes are getting clean.

Can you even hear me? The rain's so loud.

Yeah.

Oh,

oh.

I'm so good at that.

Oh, what if I could go back in time? How

could I make this trip better? I think it

went fairly well.

Maybe I should have bought the SIM card

from day one. SIM cards

really useful. Pocket Wi-Fi on its own is

just— I don't know if the SIM card on its

own would be okay, or maybe SIM

card on its own would be as bad as the

pocket Wi-Fi on its own. Maybe it's good

now because they're working together.

But I would need to buy probably 4 of them

for a whole month,

which would be $120 on SIM

cards and data.

What have

You are regressing, not progressing. Why?

Looking for a Japanese waifu

who would let me go on Tinder and dates

and get me a visa,

no strings attached.

Well, look at this staircase. It's like a

slope, sloped steps.

Oh,

this is scary. Better not

slip.

It's a very anime-looking footpath.

Have they made these metal fences look

like bamboo? It looks like a bamboo thing.

Should have painted it green. Wow,

look, anime.

Do I like Alestorm? Yeah, I like the song

called Drink.

It's quite catchy.

Oh, my shoes are drenched. I need

Wellington boots.

So 1,500 calories a day.

Oh, my feet hurt.

Squelchy shoes.

How are you feeling back in Japan?

It feels kind of anticlimactic,

to be honest. I was waiting for 3

years come back, and now it's just like,

okay, I'm back, now what? I thought

I could pick up from 2020, back with

Chihiro, 50K views again.

Can I come have a drink with you? Only if

you are a girl. And can we have sex?

I think that beep means yes.

Oh, my feet.

Yeah, I'm gonna get trench foot.

Rain foot.

Circle back to the hotel back at 5, half

5, about an hour.

Get the hair dryer out, blow my feet.

How much money would I have to pay to get

one of these girls to suck my toes?

Put my

toe up her bum.

Bet she'll

like that.

I'll do it for free. Wow,

sounds amazing.

Big toe up the bum hole, please.

I didn't break up with the Thai

girlfriend. We're still together,

unfortunately.

Clickbait.

Title. Yeah, well, what you going to do

about it? Going to cry?

Welcome to YouTube.

Clickbait is the name of the game.

It's called life.

I mean, everything in real life is

basically clickbait. You look at

McDonald's advertising. The burgers look

really nice. You buy one, it doesn't look

as good. So you got clickbaited. You go on

a dating app, the girls look way nicer

than they do in real life. You got

clickbaited again. Movie trailers make

the movie look really cool and

interesting. You go and watch it and it's

boring. Clickbaited again.

Why would YouTube be any different?

My hand hurts holding the umbrella.

My fingers are too long to get a good

grip.

Look at my fingers, they're too long.

The shaft is too skinny. I need a thicker

grip.

Tired. Walking is a lot harder than

cycling.

I'm holding the umbrella on the metal bit

because if I hold the handle, the wind

blows it and there's less stability.

Umbrella grip adapters.

I thought they would. They have something

for everything, don't they?

Shopping bag grips. Maybe go

this way now. Oh, wind.

What does he want to do? I want to go

home, dry my feet.

I'm not sure what to do about food. I'm

still not very hungry. Around 7,

got to go back out again, cuz I'm

not walking around for 2 hours until

7:00 to get food. I think

we go back to hotel, rest, dry up,

and then get food after a few hours.

Maybe I'll get that vending machine ramen,

see if it's any good. I haven't

had ramen since I came home apart from my

own homemade ramen.

Oh, I hate the wind.

How do humans survive in this world so

long? It's so unhospitable.

The rain, The rain, the wind, my aching

legs. How did we not go extinct?

Oh my God,

my foot's

killing me now.

Imagine life

1,000 years ago. No Warm hotel

room, no internet, no hair dryer,

no heating.

How did they survive?

He's wasting money. How is it wasting

money?

What is— what's the alternative then to

not waste money? Sit in my mum's house my

Oh, let me guess, get a job. Great idea,

never heard that before.

I said many times I'm here in Japan

because I had to leave Thailand because

I didn't have any days left on my passport

Not flying all the way back home to

England, stupid 12-hour flight, when I

could just hop on a plane to Japan. Why is

it so hard to understand? I don't get it.

Are people just dumb?

What part of I don't want to go back to

England do you not understand?

Jesus Christ.

Oh,

graveyard.

Japanese gravestones are weird. They look

like tiny skyscrapers.

Wow, this looks so pretty.

Come here at night. 3 AM.

3 AM Japanese graveyard ghost calling.

Can we summon the ghost of Emperor

Hirohito at 3 AM?

Take a picture.

It's not a great picture.

It's not very interesting.

Yamamoto. I find it funny they have their

names on the front of their house instead

of a— and I don't know if they have a

house number. I guess they

do. They Chia J.

Geiger Company.

Oh cool, look at this, another little

walkway. That's a steep walkway.

Aizen Zaka.

Yeah, I guess we've got to go.

It's like the cat cafe lady, she's got

blonde hair.

Every time I see blonde hair, I think it's

at the cat cafe lady.

How is

she so fast?

Oh my God, he's riding a bike down there.

What's this guy riding a bike down this

ski slope?

Oh my God,

squealing all

the way down. That looks scary.

Imagine he fell off right in front of me.

Do you think I would go and help him?

Let's just walk off. I guess I should say

大丈夫ですか。 Sit

back. I think a nice hot ramen and

maybe a beer.

Ah, stopped raining nearly. It's not

raining as much. Oh my God, why is it

effing Sit

go this way. Now look at these chalk

markings on the road.

I wonder what these calculations are.

Look at this.

Is it back? For God's sake,

why does it keep effing?

For God's

sake, why does it keep effing?

I think you missed my talk. About the

markings on the road. I don't

I just said those lines are probably where

the pipes are.

Check the map.

嗯。 Yeah,

I'm lost.

I think, I think— what's over behind this

fence? Oh, it's a cemetery.

I thought the road was under me, the main

road.

How did you meet Shahira? On Tinder.

We met at the Starbucks

in, I think, Dotonbori,

Namba Station, and then we walked a bit,

went to a kushikatsu place,

then we went to karaoke. No, we went to a

bar after the kushikatsu. I think we went

to a hub Hubba, got some drinks,

and then we went to karaoke.

I asked her if she wanted to do all-night

karaoke. She said okay. So I went to

karaoke and I tried touching her up, but

she wouldn't let me have sex with her.

She said she doesn't have sex on the first

but we kissed and then we held hands

coming out of the karaoke back to the

train station. See, I got Chihiro on the

first date. Kiss, hold hands, easy.

Bala bing, bala bong.

And then second date, uh, we went to ramen

outside of the station where she works at.

This is just a car park.

Okay,

can I go up there? Says dead end.

Looks nice. God, I need to pee again.

And then after ramen, went back to her

place and stayed the night.

So yeah, second date. First base.

And then we dated whilst living separately

for a few weeks. Then I think at the end

of October I asked if I could move in with

her and she said okay. Then I left the

guest house, said goodbye to James.

And the rest is history.

I wonder what she's up to now.

You need a stadium buddy.

What's that, like a,

a bag I can pee into connected to a

pipe in my trousers?

I hope that

guy have purple hair. Did you see

that guy? He's got purple hair.

More graveyards. Go this

way. I feel like I've been here already.

Do do do do do do do.

Oh my God, I— why do I need to pee again?

Damn it, I can't even enjoy a walk.

What did I drink? I drank that hot

chocolate, didn't I? And a glass of water.

That was it. And the Coca-Cola from the