Exploring Kyoto [8TAr1xDfgyE]

最好游客。

Testing, testing.

I'm at the castle.

How was your sleep?

It was okay, but I feel really tired

today.

My knees hurt as well.

I feel like a zombie.

Okay, which way should I go?

I wanted to get McDonald's, but the

breakfast menu is finished now.

I don't know why they finish the breakfast

menu so early.

It should finish after 12, I think.

Okay, there's too many people over there.

That's the entrance of the castle.

Oh, I got the shampoo, by the way.

They didn't even notice I took it.

I took all the shampoo,

so I saved myself ¥800.

Because if I was going to buy my own

shampoo, it would cost like ¥800.

So I saved ¥800 by not buying shampoo.

So that's like ¥800 off the price for the

hotel.

Genius!

And I got the coffee.

The coffee wasn't good though, but I got

the creamer and the sugar.

It's mine now.

So this This is Kyoto.

Very nice.

I forgot to put my sun cream on.

I had to sit on that bench in front of the

castle putting sun cream on.

It's a bit embarrassing.

I miss Blood Bucket.

Maybe I can see her this week.

I saw her Twitter.

She had a cute girl staying over her

house.

Who's that?

So I think today, if it's free, I'm I want

to go inside the castle thing, and there's

also an imperial palace, and they have

botanical gardens.

Does that sound interesting?

Bet you guys would love to see the

botanical gardens.

Oh, I tried— you know the Hello Cycling

thing?

They also have these electric bikes.

Not, not electric assisted bikes, but

actually fully electric.

Where you twist the handle and it goes.

But you have to take a little test, which

I passed, and then you gotta upload ID,

but it has to be Japanese ID.

So I'm screwed unless I can use Blood

Bucket's ID.

I might be able to.

I don't see why not.

It's kind of lame you have to be Japanese

to unlock the twist-and-go electric bikes,

but I've never seen them anywhere.

When I go to the Hello Cycling stations,

they only have the pedal-assisted electric

bikes.

I still haven't paid for yesterday's

bicycle.

I don't know how to pay.

I'll figure it out when I get back to the

guest house.

So maybe Blood Bucket can help me unlock

the special electric bikes.

Not sure.

Kyoto seems like a nice place to live.

I like how the roads are very wide.

Oh, I have to book my plane ticket to

Tokyo for May.

My girlfriend booked her tickets, so it's

official,

but she's gonna have to wait when I leave

Japan.

She's gonna have to wait in Japan for like

9 hours because her flight is on the same

day, but it's in the evening.

So she's gonna be— I don't know what she's

gonna do.

Sit in the airport for 9 hours, or she

could— I'm not sure.

She could come with me to the airport and

say goodbye at the airport, or we could

say goodbye in the city.

If she comes with me to the airport,

she'll have to sit in the airport for 9

hours or get a train back into the city.

Get lunch and stuff.

I don't know what she would want to do.

What would you do?

I don't know,

might just wait at the airport, get lunch,

walk around.

So I have to get a plane ticket.

I'll probably go from Itami Airport, fly

to Haneda.

I probably get to Tokyo the day before she

gets there and then stay a night and then

do a live stream in Tokyo before she

arrives, and then next day meet her,

do some sightseeing,

and then we have to come back to Osaka,

maybe on the bullet train, cuz that could

be

a new experience for her.

And then today,

walk around Kyoto and then head back in

the evening.

Should be able to do 8 or 9 hours on the

battery bank.

No, I'm not walking back.

I'm going to get the train.

My legs are destroyed.

I'm walking like an old man now.

I can barely walk in a straight line.

I just feel like I have no energy.

I need to get food.

I saw a McDonald's next to the Imperial

Palace.

After yesterday's lunch— oh, that Kura

sushi was awful.

Boiled salmon sushi.

Why do they even do that?

Where's the raw salmon?

Sushi isn't supposed to be boiled.

You're walking on the wrong side of the

sidewalk.

Yeah, why is everyone walking on that

side?

That guy's running on the wrong side then.

Why is he running like that?

Why is he running like that?

Hong Kong guy didn't reply to me.

Ghosted again by another OG side

character.

Can't believe it.

Unless he doesn't check his messages.

He hasn't even opened the message.

Boring.

Why is everyone boring?

People don't like me.

Based on my actions from 2018 and '19?

Can't they tell I've changed?

It's been 4 or 5 years.

I'm not the same person anymore, but they

treat me like I'm still the same person.

It's not fair.

I didn't badmouth anyone recently.

Hong Kong guy would definitely bring

views.

I could title it Meeting an Old Friend.

Eijyojo Castle entrance that way.

I was sitting on the bench and then this

woman came next to me on the same bench.

She was wearing this full kimono outfit

and I thought it was a Japanese woman.

I looked up and it's a white woman.

With brown hair and she took out this

selfie stick.

I thought, I don't know, it's kind of lame

dressed up in a kimono and stuff to visit

a Japanese— like super weeb mode.

Well, at least she's having fun, I guess.

I just think it'd be kind of embarrassing.

And she was alone.

I didn't see anyone with her.

She sat next to me on the bench.

You wear weave too?

Yeah, but I'm not gonna dress up as a

samurai and then walk around a Japanese

castle.

It's just kind of lame.

It'd be like some white guy coming here

dressing up in samurai clothing and then

carrying a katana.

Did you enjoy your shampoo?

Yeah, I took it all.

It's in my bag.

I poured it into the bottle, and then to

make it look like I didn't take all the

shampoo, I pour in half of the body soap

into the shampoo bottle and then mix it

with water so it looks like the shampoo.

So they don't even know I took it.

It just looks like I used half the shampoo

and half the body soap.

They said body shampoo.

It's basically the same as hair shampoo.

How is it different?

Don't tell them.

I'm pretty sure it's okay.

You pay for the hotel room, it means

everything in there belongs to you.

You know, the liquid consumables, it's all

yours to use, isn't it?

I paid for it, so it's mine.

Some poor bastard's gonna shampoo his hair

with watery body wash.

It's the same thing, whatever.

It's just soap, isn't it?

At the end of the day, it's just

bacteria-killing soap.

Just comes in different names.

It's all soap at the end of the day.

Now I've got half a bottle of Apple Hotel

shampoo and I've got a full bottle of this

shampoo.

It should be enough to last me for months.

Don't need to buy any shampoo.

I hate buying shampoo, the damn stuff's so

expensive.

Like ¥1,000 just to get a bottle of

shampoo.

It's rubbish.

No,

I didn't take a towel.

I really wanted a sausage McMuffin.

That was really slow.

Maybe I need some food to energize.

I feel so half

Dead.

There was no date.

I ended the stream and went straight to

bed.

Dun dun dun dun.

I hope it's not going to rain.

The app says it's cloudy and then 35% of

rain from 7 PM.

I'm showing you the amazing views of the

backside of the castle gates.

Look, there's a gate there.

I'm— I guess there used to be a bridge

connecting it, but the bridge probably

burnt down.

Everything keeps burning down in Japan.

I don't know why.

Maybe don't make things out of wood.

How many bottles of shampoo could you have

bought with the price of the hotel room?

I could have bought 7 bottles of shampoo,

but

You get other things out of the hotel

room, not just shampoo.

Like, we got a nice experience staying in

Kyoto,

and I got sachet of sugar and creamer.

I'm in Kyoto now, in case you didn't know.

I'll walk around this wall, maybe peek

inside.

I don't want to pay any money if I have to

pay to go in.

And then we'll go to the Imperial Palace.

This is where the capital of Japan used to

be

a long time ago.

I'm just warming up Warming up the legs.

I did 46,000 steps yesterday.

I burned 1,200 calories.

Amazing.

Yeah, I thought maybe I'd stay another

night here, but there's probably not much

else to do.

I could get a dormitory room for £20.

I think I'd rather just head back today,

get back around 10 PM,

do some sightseeing.

Can I go down here?

What?

Narimono kinshi.

Things that make a noise banned.

Oh, like musical instruments.

Drones are banned, no running, no

bicycles, no motorbikes, no music, no

singing, no shouting.

There's so many warning signs.

No YouTubers,

no feeding the animals.

I like this one though, no shouting.

I think if you shout, you should get

fined.

There should never be a reason to shout.

Shouting, ¥10,000 fine.

Oh, what's this guy just stretching all

over the place?

Just stretching all over the railings.

Wow, a castle.

I never stretch.

I don't see the point of stretching.

It doesn't even do anything.

Old people be stretching everywhere.

What does it even do though?

Like, oh wow, look, I'm stretching.

What even is the point?

I walked 50 kilometers and I feel fine

today.

Just feel a bit low energy, but I'm not in

pain.

Tuning in at lunchtime, what's going on?

I'm just walking around the castle.

Why that guy— why is this old man just

throwing random things like he's a kid?

You said your ankles hurt.

Oh, my knees hurt a little bit from the

biking,

but it's okay now.

It's gone now.

I think my girlfriend's upset because I

didn't phone her today.

What?

Why is she saying, where are you?

I'm streaming now, leave me alone.

Walking is barely exercise.

It is if you walk 30 kilometers.

Only get a nice thick McDonald's Fed up of

Japanese food.

Japanese food just doesn't hit the spot

when you're craving food.

It looks pretty and everything, but when

I'm hungry, I don't think of Japanese

food.

Maybe yakiniku.

Look, now he's like bending over.

Old people are weird.

They walk five minutes and then they start

bending over, and they walk another five

minutes.

They start stretching and stuff.

I'm hungry.

Kara again.

I really don't.

Care too much for fried chicken.

Sometimes it's okay.

I'd rather have a sandwich—

egg and sausage

with crisps.

Oh, I can't see the castle.

Get a good ramen.

Ramen always tastes the same no matter

where you go.

I've been to loads of ramen places and

they always taste the same.

Tastes okay, but at the end of the day

it's just like salty water with noodles in

it.

It's either miso or Tonkotsu, slightly

creamy.

It's okay, I guess.

Rather have Pot Noodles, to be honest.

I think Pot Noodles is better than any

Japanese ramen.

Nothing beats a good chicken and mushroom

or beef and tomato.

They should have a beef and tomato ramen.

What are you gonna get from McDonald's?

I'm not sure, I might try a new burger

instead of the same stuff I get every

time.

I really wanted the muffin, the sausage

McMuffin.

Oh, good station.

Oh my God, I

hope I'm not sick.

Prawn cutlet burger, that sounds

disgusting.

Why are there so many people running?

I think the weather's nice.

It's not too sunny.

I like it when it's cloudy.

I can't walk in a straight line on this

street.

Path.

It's like sloping down.

Gloomy day.

Yeah, I like it though.

It's pollen season.

I don't think I'm affected by Japanese

pollen.

It's only UK grass pollen that makes me

sneeze a lot.

They

came.

Gay guys.

Oh, it's that funny runner.

I thought he sounded a bit gay.

I kind of regret coming around the back of

the castle.

There's absolutely nothing here.

Can I get in around the back?

Oh, it's open.

Can I go in though?

Oh, it says no entry here.

Ah, it says special security patrol.

Why can't I get in this way?

Let me in.

Is it free to enter?

I'm hungry.

I should have got food first.

You know what else I noticed since I came

to Japan?

I stopped getting mouth ulcers and tongue

ulcers.

I kept getting them in Thailand.

Little bumps, painful bumps on the side of

my tongue

that would go white and take nearly 2

weeks to heal.

I kept getting those in Thailand, but I

haven't been getting them here.

I'm not sure why.

Have I been eating more vitamins in Japan?

Everything, all my problems I had in

Thailand went away as soon as I left

Thailand.

Like pooping, skin stuff, fatty belly.

Weird.

I don't know why.

Something wrong with Thailand.

I really can't figure it out.

It's not like my diet's really good now.

I have McDonald's 4 times a week.

Ah, goddamn kids.

If I just stand here

Filming the lamppost.

Spicy and hot weather.

I don't eat spicy food, and I didn't go

out much,

and I'm not really eating Japanese food.

Even those kids are the same height as me.

God damn it, 14-year-old kids same height.

I could probably get beaten up by a

14-year-old kid.

Some of them were same height as me.

It's not fair.

In World of Warcraft, when you're level

35, you destroy a level 15, but in the

real world it's not like that.

I thought when I'm 35, I could beat up any

kid under 16.

I guess not.

Life's not fair.

I just want to beat up kids.

I mean, I just want to walk past kids

without being scared of being beaten up.

I'm level 35, they're like level 14.

I should be able to one-shot them.

One shot them in the back.

What's this say?

Do not give food to the animals.

At least the signs are all in Japanese,

which means it's not racist because us

foreigners can't read it, so they aimed at

Japanese people.

I don't really want to go around the front

of the castle, there's so many people.

Well, that was Nijo Castle.

Hope you enjoyed it.

Let's go to the next place.

I just showed you the wall.

I'll go around into the entrance.

Not like you guys care anyway.

Daniel's low T, then how come I jerked off

4 times last night?

Damn, I was so horny in that hotel room.

I want to see the castle.

Okay, I'll show it for Kerry.

Even that guy is really tall, 6 foot.

Every single white guy here is like 6 foot

at least.

Okay, so here's the front of the castle.

All the tourist buses waiting.

It smells like pot noodle.

Oh, you have to pay.

Do you have to pay to go in here?

I'm not paying.

I think you have to pay.

Oh my God, ¥1,300.

No thanks.

General admission,

1,300.

Junior high school student, 400.

Maybe I can pass as a student.

Uh, we can't go in.

I'll just look at it on Google.

Rip-off.

Imagine having to pay to go into a castle.

Everyone here is so big, it's weird.

I feel like a midget now.

Everyone here is like 6 foot tall.

Oh, I can't see the castle from the

entrance.

That's the best I can do.

Too broke to go in.

They've hidden the castle so you can't see

it from the entrance.

Oh well, let's go to the palace.

Um, girlfriend said, how do we go back to

Osaka?

By bullet train.

Okay, go to the palace next.

¥1,300 just to see the castle.

I can get a whole McDonald's for that.

Oh, hi, Blood Bucket.

Who's that girl on your Twitter that

stayed at your house?

Very curious.

Yeah,

she looked cute.

Okay, we just walk in a straight line and

turn right.

She's 27.

Yeah, but who is she?

Mother of 2.

What?

Very young

to be a mother

unless the baby's like 1 year old.

Can I be the stepdad?

Hmm, Nijo Castle.

Not up to my standards.

Thought it'd be free to go in.

Everything's a money trap.

111 viewers, a sign.

Oh, my legs are so tired already.

She's a dominatrix, I see.

Does she like tying people up too?

I don't want to be tied up.

It looks

scary.

I saw Netflix dramas where the guy gets

tied up and then gets killed.

I don't trust anyone.

What show was it?

I think it was The Blacklist.

There was a guy who liked getting tied up.

And then she tied him up and then slit his

throat.

No, she put a bag over his head whilst he

was tied up and then he died.

I'd be scared.

I went on a date with a 6'2 tall

Manchester girl in 2022.

She was like 24, but she had a 6-year-old

daughter or something,

and she said her mom's like 35.

What

did he say?

Did he say something to me?

He had his window down.

I heard a voice come from that taxi.

Did you hear that?

Can't even cross the road without getting

stupid yelled at.

It sounded rude,

the tone.

I'm sick and tired of Japanese people

being rude to me.

Can't even cross the road, something like

that.

What's wrong with people?

So cranky.

I swear in Thailand people are not this

cranky

and rude.

Maybe it's because I don't understand

Thai, so I don't know what anyone's saying

anyway.

Maybe he was pissed because I'm walking

really slowly, but the pedestrian crossing

said green, so it's my right of way.

Stupid idiot.

Where's Sunny?

Dunno, probably working.

Damn, Kyoto is boring.

Just a street, and then all the good

things are closed behind a paywall.

Go to Tokyo.

I'm

going to Tokyo next Next month.

Oh my God, look at this guy's afro!

Look at the soap suds.

People get so mad on the road.

I think it's because it's a stressful

activity.

I think I'd be like that too if I had to

slam on the brakes.

Be like, stupid idiot, get out the way.

Oh, my hip joint hurts.

I broke my glasses, put them together with

tape.

How did you break them?

My arthritis joints aching.

Where's McDonald's?

I'm hungry.

I don't like Coco Ichiban.

They kicked Ice out for streaming, but

they let Chris and Connor stream in there.

Stupid.

Boycott Coco Ichiban.

Liars.

They said no streaming, it's our company

policy, and then Chris Connor, PewDiePie

streaming in Coco Ichiban.

What are we doing today?

I'm just going to look at some temples and

stuff

that I haven't seen before.

Everything's so spread out though,

and I'm walking really slow.

I'll walk a bit faster.

Are you going to meet ice Ice?

No, what?

He's not even in Japan anymore.

I'm never gonna meet Ice again.

I met him twice.

You think that's enough?

He's not even very famous anymore, so it's

a bit boring.

I reckon half his viewers on Kick are

bots.

He goes to Japan and he does the same

thing over and over.

A bit boring.

I think the first subathon was only the,

the only good one.

Bored of ice.

Bored of everyone right now.

I'm not interested

in anyone really.

Wow, Kyoto is so dull, isn't it?

Hmm, where

are the places where it looks nice?

Oh my God, tired.

Whoa, halfway there.

Maybe I get a bicycle again,

but it's kind of expensive.

¥600 or ¥800 for a couple of hours.

Who's he talking to?

Casey streaming on Instagram.

Really?

No, he's not.

Why are you lying?

He's not streaming.

He didn't reply to my message.

Look,

says account can't receive your messages.

They don't allow new messages from

everyone.

Lied.

Oh look, they're looking for staff.

¥1,010 per hour.

Why

is he counting bicycles?

He blocked you?

I don't think so.

If he blocks me, I wouldn't be able to see

his profile.

It would just be a blank profile like you

know who.

I think he just hasn't checked his message

requests.

Order from the McDonald's app.

What do you get from it?

Can't be bothered.

Probably got to enter like Japanese ID,

Japanese phone number.

Can't be bothered.

They make everything so difficult if

you're not Japanese.

What's that?

Oh, Blood Bucket, can you help me

sign up for the electric scooter things?

Says you need Japanese ID.

Maybe next time I'm over we can do it,

because they have these other bicycles

which are fully electric.

Why are those speakers so

crackle.

You just have to let me take a picture of

your ID.

I tried my one, but it's a Japanese ID

only.

Oh wow, it's like slap.

I'm not begging him, I'm just asking if

he'd be up for

How long am I in Japan this time?

I've got about,

about 55 days.

I think

time's going quick.

I'm not really sure what else to do in

Japan now.

I feel like I've done everything.

I'm not really upset or angry about the

Hong Kong guy thing anymore.

Just think it would be good content if we

met up.

Looks kind of dead there.

Yeah, we're

nearly at the Imperial Palace.

Home of the Japanese capital.

You used to say you would give the

Australian guy's willy a little suck and

make it nice and wet and slip it inside.

Would you slip it inside the gay Japanese

guy and watch him go in and out?

Does this still stand?

I don't know.

Maybe

I'd be so upset if Hong Kong guy rejects

me too.

Do you think he's mad at me?

Everyone's mad.

Who else could we get back from 2018 and

'19?

Elvis reunion.

I was looking at the Elvis the Alien DMs

and then he was like having a go at me

because I complained.

About him.

He said, look, man, if you have a camera

pointed at you, you have to make it very

clear if you don't want something to be in

the video.

I did.

I said, don't tell anyone.

How much clearer can I be?

I said, I'm back with you know who, but

don't tell anyone.

And then he's like, you got to make it

clear.

How is that not clear?

Literally said, don't tell anyone.

And then he puts it in his stupid video,

and then he blames me for not making it

clear.

Idiot.

Kept asking me all these questions so he

could use it in his video.

Now Elvis's channel is still going strong.

He does movie reviews now.

He gets like half a million views every

time time, but I think he gets a lot of

trouble with copyright.

It's not worth it in my opinion,

but he probably sells a lot of merch.

You do realize the pineapple pizza lady

manipulated the friendship between you and

HK Guy?

She's been manipulating your

relationships.

Yeah, I know, that's what I've been saying

all the time, but people always like that.

She's— I'm evil, but she's not.

Elvis doesn't do drama commentary stuff

anymore.

He does boring movies.

He's gone on and on about Nicolas Cage.

Why would you care about Nicolas Cage?

He's like the worst, most boring actor

ever.

I think Adam Sandler and Nicolas Cage, 2

of the most boring

actors ever who are not even funny.

Anything with Adam Sandler in, I just

don't watch because he always does the

same boring, not funny character.

The movies all suck.

There's certain actors like Kevin Hart,

Seth Rogen I would never watch a movie if

they're in it.

Who's that guy?

There's this really boring movie about

magic.

It's got that Woody Harrison in it and the

guy with the curly hair.

I hate that movie so much.

It's so boring and not funny at all.

I think it's called Now You See Me or

something.

I had to watch that stupid movie twice.

Twice because some woman made me watch it

with her.

I watched that damn thing 2 times and it's

so boring.

They're all like, oh, look at me, I can do

this amazing magic trick.

Wow, I can do mind control, hypnotism.

I don't get the point of the movie.

It's got Morgan Freeman in it too.

Worst movie ever.

Who made you watch it?

Uh, just some dates I was on.

The pineapple pizza lady is still in

contact with Cameron.

Let's watch this.

And I said okay.

If she's divorced and moved on from you,

she shouldn't be contacting her

ex-husband's family.

She's evil, if anything.

You know that Shin, the Finnish girl?

I saw pineapple on her pizza too

in her comments.

It's really weird, don't you think?

Like, imagine that you don't like

pineapple but you keep putting it on your

pizza,

and then you claim that you hate

pineapple.

I don't understand the logic.

My God, the queue is so boring.

Where's this Imperial Palace?

I gotta turn right.

Okay.

Oh my God.

Hip joint is hurting.

Why did I have to get chlamydia?

Didn't think you'd get arthritis from

chlamydia.

Stupid.

Ah, it's green.

Got green out.

Andy Milonakis.

That looks like Andy Milonakis.

Can I make it?

Oh my God,

weird river.

If you made friends, it wouldn't be so

boring.

If I had a friend, then I wouldn't be able

to stream.

I'd rather stream than do this with a

friend, unless I could stream with the

friend,

but then I got to talk to the friend,

don't

Boring.

I'm not lonely.

I'm fine being alone.

I don't think being with someone would

make it more interesting.

You guys are my friends,

but only on YouTube, not in real life.

Unless you're a hot girl.

Just to be clear,

don't want any misunderstandings.

Oh my God, red light lasts forever and

nothing is moving.

I could have crossed this 100 times by

out.

Oh wow, it's Elvis the Alien.

Going to the aquarium again.

That would be amazing.

Is that actually Elvis?

That aquarium's so boring though.

Been there like 5 times, just bunch of

fish swimming around.

Daniel was talking crap about How come

he's here when I talked about it?

I didn't say anything.

That's not the real Elvis the Alien.

It's an imposer.

Imposter.

Imperial Palace.

It links to his channel.

Oh crap.

I didn't say anything.

Who told— did someone tell him I was

talking crap?

I didn't say nothing.

Elvis, did you know what happened

recently?

You know who— I can't— I don't know how I

can say this because I'm not allowed to

talk about it,

but you know that the people who

have the thing.

They came to my room because I was talking

about you know who,

and then they gave me a warning.

Can you believe it?

You know who reported me to the you know

who.

I think that was cryptic enough.

Plausible deniability.

I think he's gone.

You should make an update video

saying that I got arrested.

I didn't even do anything.

I just streamed close to a certain train

station.

It's not my fault.

Didn't do nothing.

Where's the palace?

Yeah, I had to go to the police station.

Made me cry.

It was so scary.

She saw you?

Well, if she saw me and I didn't see her,

then who's stalking who?

She probably sniped me.

She snipes me and then claims that I'm

stalking her.

Imperial Palace.

Go to Nintendo Factory.

I went there yesterday.

I walked past it.

For a company like Nintendo, their

headquarters is very boring.

It's just a white block.

I thought it'd be colorful.

It should have like a big green pipe

coming out of it

with a Mario.

A Mario.

What's all that sound?

Sounds like kids.

Screaming.

Why do kids have to scream?

Can they shut up?

I never screamed when I was a kid.

Oh my God, there's nothing in Kyoto.

The problem with Kyoto is you kind of have

to plan where you're going to go and then

get on the bus.

You can't just wander around and find

stuff.

Go to Gion.

Isn't that the place you're not allowed to

go to.

I've only got ¥113.

I wanted to get on a rickshaw with a cute

girl pulling it so I could clickbait a

video like that other guy did, get 20

million views.

But it'll probably cost thousands of yen

and then the video will just get 2K views.

My whale meat video did so badly, 2K

views.

No wonder they moved the capital from

Kyoto to Tokyo.

So boring here.

Imagine being a school kid All they do is

run around all day

playing

and then studying.

The future of Japan.

They should just stop studying and become

YouTubers like me.

That's what I would do.

I'd be like, school is a waste of time,

just do YouTube.

It's easier and more fun,

and you can make a lot of money.

I think I can see it, the Imperial Palace.

They should quit school and just play

pachinko full-time.

If I was a girl, I'd work at

Tobitsushinchi.

Just get banged a couple times a day, make

like ¥50,000.

Easy money.

Check meetups.

I had a look, but it's all the same.

It's just like language meetup, guided

tour of the back alleys.

5,000 yen.

Looks lame.

I want to meet up where there's only girls

and I'm the only guy and they all love me.

I don't want to pay money to hang out with

a bunch of guys that's gay.

They should pay me.

If I'm gonna hang out with guys, that I

want to be paid to do it.

This is the Imperial Palace.

I used to use a website, it was called

Osaka Call Girls,

but the website is all weird now, like it

got hacked or something.

All the links are broken.

I think it used to be ¥30,000.

¥30,000 for an hour health delivery.

Oh wow, bagel sandwich,

sandwich with soup, ¥1,000.

No thanks.

Where's McDonald's?

I want McDonald's.

Hey, what's this?

Oh, chiropractor.

Oh, I think it's free to go into the

Imperial Palace.

I love imperialism.

My favorite imperialistic empires were

Obviously the British and also the

Galactic Empire of Star Wars.

2004 Daniel in 2040, I'm alone and

depressed again.

Yeah.

Life just keeps getting worse.

Now I'm old and ugly

and can't even get 2K views on

YouTube.

It's all downhill from here.

I want to go in there.

I hate how when you start walking from

standing still, it takes a few seconds to

accelerate to optimal speed.

It should just be instant, like riding an

electric bike.

Watch, but I'm standing still.

Oh, the First step sucks.

Look at the sign.

No pitching tents.

Do not climb the trees.

Do not pick plants.

Do not feed animals.

No smoking.

Do not use musical instruments.

Do not capture animals.

No sports.

No drones.

It doesn't say no streaming.

Suck it.

Suck it, Imperial Park.

Park free entrance too.

Good thing I didn't waste my money on the

castle.

What we got here?

Probably have to pay to go into the palace

though.

Oh wow, grasshopper field!

I want to see the grasshoppers.

Large park surrounding Kyoto Imperial

Palace.

When was it built?

Transferred the capital from Kyoto to

Tokyo in 1869.

Why'd they do that?

Imagine if Kyoto was still the capital.

Okay, nice.

You're not ugly, you just have acne.

Well, in 2040 I'm going to look even

older.

Do not drink and eating— drink and eating

for cherry blossom viewing to ensure

peace.

What weird English.

Please be careful of the black kites.

I want to change kites to

people.

Wow, were these sakura trees?

Now they're green.

What's that pink tree?

It looks kind of

bland.

Well, it is free, so I can't complain

I guess.

2040, I will be 16 plus— I will be 51.

Damn,

I really hope I'm rich and successful

before that time comes.

Amazing culture

and architecture.

Wow.

No, it's boring outside.

Look, there's nothing here.

They want you to go inside to spend money.

I don't have any money.

So nothing outside to do.

There's the kids playground.

Oh my God, it's so big here.

Look, it would be nice if they had a

burger joint or hot dog stand.

Hot dog with onions.

Damn, this is empty, isn't it?

Look at this.

Maybe I can sneak in.

Where should I take my girlfriend in

Tokyo?

I want to take her to Meiji Jingu and

Skytree,

maybe Tokyo Tower.

Where else?

Maybe Mount— no, I don't think Mount Fuji

is a good idea.

She'll get tired.

Maybe we just go near it so we can see it

but not climb it.

I don't really want to climb Mount Fuji.

It's boring.

Get to— go to a train station that's near

and then just look at it.

Why is there a car coming?

Is that a police car?

There's a police car coming.

Police car's coming.

Is

that police?

It's a weird-looking police car.

It just looks like a car with a siren on

top.

I think they're just patrolling, like

security guards or something.

I could sneak in through the drain.

I could probably fit in there.

Head's probably too big.

Security.

I wish

I bought some food.

Can I get Uber Eats delivered here?

I need to sit down.

My feet hurt, getting old.

All those gray boxes.

Ah, this place is boring too.

Oh my God, there's nothing here.

Oh my God.

It's hard to walk on these stupid stones

as well.

Can I sit on that tree stump?

I'm gonna sit on those little stone

pillars.

I can't even put a bench or something, or