Why I don't regret leaving my Wife [qXMvmTyvNu0]

Sometimes people ask me if I ever regret

leaving my wife or my ex-wife, and I have

to say that in hindsight, even though

sometimes I look back at the marriage with

fond eyes and good memories, I have to say

that I don't really regret leaving my

ex-wife for several reasons. Sometimes I

do miss those days back in 2018 because

just so many things were going well for me

back in 2018. And if I said that I missed

the marriage, that would be not entirely a

lie, but not entirely the truth. I think I

just miss 2018, those 2018 vibes and that

atmosphere that were present during those

times just in general, because I managed

to achieve many goals in life back then.

I managed to get a spouse visa and achieve

my long-term goal of moving to Japan and

living in Japan and having my own visa

without having to get a job or having to

go to university to get a stupid degree,

which would have just been a massive waste

of time and very expensive. And also my

long-term dream of becoming a full-time

YouTuber was able to come true thanks to

my channel blowing up in 2018. So in

hindsight, 2018 was a pretty good damn

year for me, and I always look back at

2018 as being probably one of the best

years in my entire life. And I can't

really see the rest of my life being as

good as 2018 was. So I always look back at

2018 with great fondness. And sometimes I

do wake up in bed after having a dream

about my ex-wife thinking about how great

it was, and I do feel like I miss her a

little bit. But I don't really feel like I

regret leaving her. If I could go back in

time and leave her again, I think I

probably would want to leave her again

because because after leaving my ex-wife,

there have been a few improvements in my

life. For example, I managed to get

younger, more attractive girlfriends. As

someone who would like to become a father

at some point in the future, having a

partner or a wife or girlfriend who is

over 8 years older than you are, it

doesn't really make it very easy to be

able to make that dream come true. So as

of right now, I am 33, so it makes my

ex-wife— she would be about 41 now. And I

don't really think I would want to be

married or be in a relationship with

someone who is so much older me. I've had

a lot of relationships with older women.

I think the oldest woman I ever dated,

she was 15 years older than me, which

means she's nearly 50 years old now. And

if you said to me, Daniel, don't you

regret leaving your first girlfriend, the

Korean one? I'd be thinking, so if you're

saying that I'd never left that

girlfriend, then she would be 50 and I'd

be dating a 50-year-old woman. And that

just sounds kind of lame to me. I mean,

I'm dating a 35-year-old woman now, and if

I had to choose between dating a

35-year-old woman and a 50-year-old woman,

it's not very difficult choice to make.

And in the same sense, it's not very

difficult to say that I'd prefer dating my

current 35-year-old Thai girlfriend over

being with my 41-year-old Japanese wife.

It's not a very hard decision to make as a

guy who obviously finds younger women more

attractive. And you might be thinking

that's kind of mean to break up with

someone just because they've gotten a lot

older. And I guess it's kind of true,

it's not very nice. And I'm also going to

get older, I am getting older, and I am

aging. But the thing is, men are

biologically more attractive to younger

women for obvious reasons, such as it just

means that they have a better chance of

creating offspring with you. They have

better fertility rates, they're healthier,

they're younger, they've got more energy

to be able to cope with the whole giving

birth process. So unfortunately, I am just

biologically programmed to find older

women less attractive than younger women.

It's not that I choose to feel that way,

it's just that I feel that way, in the

same sense that I find bigger bottoms and

bigger boobs to be more attractive than

smaller ones. That's just because those

relate to better fertility chances, have

wider hips and bigger boobs because they

store more milk for the babies to drink.

So even though my girlfriend isn't exactly

the youngest peach in the pear tree,

she's only 2 years older than I am, which

is a much better age gap in my opinion

than having a wife who's over 8 years

older than you. In a way, you could say

that I made a bit of an upgrade compared

to my ex-wife. You just don't understand

how difficult it was finally having the

courage and guts to be able to leave my

ex-wife. I tried so many times to leave

her because ultimately I did did want to

leave her, as soon as we got married, I

kind of had feelings of regret thinking,

oh no, I don't know if this was the right

thing to do. And to be honest, I didn't

actually think the marriage was gonna go

through because I tried getting married

before in 2014, but the relationship kind

of fell apart before we managed to finish

all of the paperwork. And at the time I

was thinking, getting married seems like a

better idea than going back home and

living with my parents and being single

and alone again. But unfortunately,

things just went really smoothly and they

just approved our marriage without really

questioning us or anything, putting up any

kind of roadblocks or obstacles in front

of us. Everything went super smooth. I got

my visa and that was that. But then the

regret started setting in and I was

thinking, I'm not really happy with this

decision I've made. How can I get out of

it? And it was really tough because it's

not the same as just blocking or ditching

a temporary girlfriend that you've only

been seeing for a few months where she

doesn't know your family, she doesn't know

anyone in your real life. You're not

really integrated in each other's lives in

that kind of temporary relationship. It's

so easy to just block them and then never

see or hear from them ever again. But when

you're with a wife who is friends with

your parents and they've met your parents

and your family and they're in contact

with each other and they're so integrated

and intertwined with your own life, it's

not as easy as just blocking them and

leaving. You've actually got to tell them

that you want to leave and explain why.

But because life was so comfortable and so

cozy with my wife and being married and

everything was so cheap because we shared

the rent, had a cheap place to to live in,

it was very difficult to actually have the

willpower to leave her and become single

and alone again and have to go back to

living in expensive accommodation and

serviced apartments again. And I tried

many times to leave. I even bought a

ticket to Korea once, and I nearly went to

the airport. I ended up chickening out,

and I didn't go to the airport, and I just

wasted all that money buying a ticket to

Korea. And I went back to my ex-wife's

place and pretended that nothing happened.

So what I did was, since I didn't have the

guts to leave voluntarily and just tell

her that I wanted to leave, my tactic was

to just be really miserable to be around

and be really annoying and upset her and

make it get to a point where she doesn't

want to be with me anymore. And it did get

to that point. I became so depressed and

miserable and I upset her so many times to

the point that she actually wanted to get

rid of me. And it's a lot easier to get

dumped than to do the dumping yourself.

I've never actually had to dump a

girlfriend. Because I don't actually like

dumping people. I don't want to tell them

that I want to leave and I don't like them

anymore. That's very difficult and has a

lot of emotional burden on me. So I prefer

to get dumped, and I usually do this same

tactic with pretty much all of my exes. I

just become a really bad boyfriend, and

then I make them want to get rid of me,

and then they'll tell me that they want to

break up, and then I'll just say, oh,

okay, sorry you feel that way, goodbye,

and then I leave. And then I move on in

life and it's easy. I don't feel any

guilt, I don't feel any emotional burden

because they were the ones that made the

decision to break up. And I like to call

this the reverse coffee breakup tactic.

And the reason why I called it the reverse

coffee tactic is because I used to do this

thing when I had a job in an office where

when they told me to make coffee for

everyone, I would make the coffee really

badly on purpose to hopefully get them to

stop asking me to make their coffee

because they'll think I better not ask

Daniel to make me coffee because he makes

really bad coffee. And actually, one of my

coworkers called me out on this because he

noticed exactly what I was doing. He said

to me, Daniel, when you don't want to do

something, you just do it really badly on

purpose, hoping to not have to do it

anymore, don't you? And I lied. I said,

no, what are you talking about? But he

called me out exactly on what I was doing.

And that was at that point I realized,

yeah, I do do this thing where when I

don't want to do something, I'll just try

to do it really badly and kind of sabotage

myself, hoping that I'll just not have to

do anymore. For example, when I was

working at the petrol station, I openly

admitted that I do my job really bad in

the hopes that they will fire me because I

really hated the job, but I didn't have

the guts to say I want to quit. So when

people ask me if I regret leaving my

ex-wife, the answer is an easy no, not

really. Because even though when I was sad

and lonely and I did miss my ex-wife

sometimes, now that I think about it, I'm

in a better relationship now with my Thai

girlfriend. She's younger, she's taller,

she's got bigger bobs. And it's kind of

made me think that when something ends,

even though after it ends it's kind of sad

and you feel alone again, usually

something better comes along. You just

have to wait. You might have to wait a

year or 2 years, but eventually things do

recover. It's like the stock market. It

might be in a bubble and then it crashes.

It feels like the end of the world, but

then eventually the recovery comes and

then stocks go to an all-time new high.

Over the years, I've had a lot of

experience in relationships. I've had a

lot of dating experience. And what I've

found is every time a relationship ends,

even though it's kind of sad that it ends

and you do miss the person a little bit,

usually the next relationship is a lot

better. The girlfriend that you have in

the next relationship might be younger and

more attractive and more fun to be around.

So don't be sad that something ends, just

smile that it happened and look forward to

what's coming around the next corner,

because it could be a lot better than what

you had before. You never know.