my ex wife kicked me out to this park

Who remembers this place?

Ten points.

Dun dun dun.

So this is the toilet

where I pretended I used because I was

homeless. Do you remember that?

I wonder if I can open it.

Whoa, good thing there wasn't a load of

shit in it. Yeah, it looks exactly how it

looks like when I filmed it last time.

So I made a video here saying I was

homeless and she kicked me out and that I

live in the park, and I sat on this bench.

I sat on this bench in front of the

chain-link fence eating that sandwich,

and I put the camera here and Put the

camera here on this ledge like this.

Or was it— I think it was right in front

of the— it

was like this.

There's a public toilet here. It's just a

tiny thing, but it's okay, I guess.

There's a lock. And yeah,

it's a bit dirty, but it does

the job.

Guys, I'm homeless. And then I ate my

sandwich. Do you remember?

And then I walked around this chain-link

I sat on this very bench about 6 years

ago. The video is still up, I think.

It's probably something like, she kicked

me out. I sat on this bench, had a little

sandwich. Oh, I also came to this park

when I smashed her glass door in. I came

here, I had a little cry. What was that?

Oh, those geese. Yeah, when I smashed

her glass door in, I stormed off down this

road and I came here and I sat here and I

cried. And then

I went back to— was it the Airbnb I was

staying at? Yeah, I sat on that bench,

made that fake homeless video.

Felt so weird. I came here earlier today

just to be alone so I can let the memories

sink in.

Yeah, I sat here and I cried a little bit.

And then I went back there to go back to

the train station to go back to— I think

it was Scamoto, my Airbnb.

This is very epic park history

making.

How am I stalking Chihiro? She doesn't

live here, it's just a park.

It's so weird to be here. 7 years ago I

made that video.

20— no, it's 2018 and

'19, would have been 6 and 5 years ago.

5 years ago, it wasn't even that long ago

when I smashed her door.

I remember walking up and down that

chain-link fence area after I moved out of

the guest house.

Hey, so it's the next day. I didn't go

back to my girlfriend's place because she

sent me a message saying that she didn't

want to see me and that I should go and

look for a hotel or something, but I

didn't feel like going to a hotel. I

didn't want to spend the money. I didn't

feel like seeing anyone, so I just walked

around for a few hours and then I sat

around in this park for a bit more. I

think I walked around until about 2 AM and

then I just sat in the park for a few

hours. It was— it was pretty cold, but I'm

wearing a lot of clothing right now, so it

wasn't too bad. I was so close to getting

on the train and leaving. I felt— I just

felt so depressed and kind of irritated.

There's another park somewhere where I

made the other I got kicked out video.

Where I nearly did— is that a red light

district? Where I nearly did get on the

train and ditch her. I nearly ditched her

so many times, I ended up going back over

and over. What's this tube? Are you

supposed to crawl through it?

You get stuck.

I don't want to go further that way

because that's getting very close to where

she lives. Would be a bit weird.

There's another park as well. The one

where she tracked me down and beat me up

whilst I was streaming. I was saying

something like she's got a small bum.

I'm kind of scared now she's gonna appear

behind me and like whack me. I was just

streaming in that park and then she just

suddenly shows up and hits me. Scared the

crap out of me. But that park is like

right behind the old building where we

lived. There were 2 buildings. One was the

first one, the oldish one, and then the

second one was the new modern building.

I can't believe she's tracked me down

while streaming and then whacked me. It

was so funny. She was

like, "More man, I need." She kept

calling me old man.

Goddamn, this lens is bright. Look what it

really looks like this. Look. That's what

it really looks like to me in real life.

Yeah,

I went to that park earlier today, but I

wouldn't stream it. It's a bit weird being

that close. I mean, I walked right past

the balcony because the first building—

we lived on the first floor, the ground

floor. I went into the building as well,

but you couldn't get in, you needed the

code. I just stood

there and I looked at it and I was like,

wow, I used to live here. I can't believe

I'm here again.

Had a peek through the window. No, not

really. There's something going on with my

stomach, like massive gas ball forming.

It's gonna be the best fart ever.

No, I didn't enter her building. I entered

the old building that we moved out of.

I really like these little parks, little

playgrounds in Japan. Don't have them in

Thailand. They're always deserted as well.

Sometimes there's cats if you bring food.

Yeah, I climbed up the balcony and I

tapped on the window.

I think the fart's coming.

No, no, no, no.

I don't want to go back to the guest house

room. I got whisper like this all the

time.

Oh, the gas came out the other end. I

thought it was going to be a fart.

What did I buy? I bought sugar, milk,

chicken,

and was that it? I put the chicken in my

I wonder if I'm gonna be

like 60 and I come back here again, and

then I'll be like, 30 years ago, this is

where I sat.

I don't know why I hated living in Japan

so much back then. I hated it. I was like,

oh, this is so boring. Oh, all these cute

girls messaging me, but I can't go and

meet them. Oh, I miss my home in UK.

Why am I here?

Now I miss it.

Intimidating behavior? How am I saying

anything that's intimidating? I'm just

saying I miss it. I miss the place and the

My life's full of regrets.

I got greedy, seduced by women,

lost everything. Lost my channel,

lost my money, lost my visa.

Now it's raining. Oh my God, are you

kidding? Can't even give me 1 hour?

Please don't rain.

I literally lost everything though,

didn't I? I lost my youth, my money,

my fame, my visa.

All gone.

Now it's raining.

Yeah, but if I stayed, my channel probably

would have still died, and then I would

have been thinking, oh, all the girls I

could have banged— Mila, German girl—

why did I stay here? So I would have

complained no matter what I did.

That's what I hate about myself. I just

know any option I choose,

I'm gonna regret it. And then if I didn't

choose it, I would have regretted not

choosing it. I'm gonna sit under here.

Sit under here. Those kids are coming. I

can hear girl voices. I'm gonna jump out.

Oh, they're over there. Let's sit under

the slide, eat my chicken.

I don't want to go back to the guest

house. Boring. I feel

nervous. I can hear everything. People go

to the toilet and hear them going. I

probably hear them pooping as well.

Life's so hard because you've got so many

options and you don't know which one's the

right option,

and you can't go back and re-choose.

Who's that?

Who's that coming over the hill?

I tried to make the best decisions at the

time when the options presented themselves

to me.

It seemed like a no-brainer to ditch wife

and go for young fangirls.

That's me.

Maybe next year I go back to Bangkok and

I'll be like, oh, I miss Bangkok,

it was nice, but last year I hated it,

when actually it's not bad. My whole life

is just like nostalgia and regret.

No, it hasn't been long enough to start

feeling like that yet.

I'll go back to Bangkok in like 5 years

and say, oh, this is where I used to live.

I hated it back then, but it's actually

decent.

I miss Thai girlfriend.

I hate things in the present, and then

when it's become the past, then I start

yearning for it. Don't know why.

I must look so creepy just sitting under

this slide, but there's nowhere else to

take shelter.