Why I Hated Living in Japan [KiN6lKKUESs]

I've lived in Japan for more than 2 years

in total, and I wanted to make a video

talking about reasons why I dislike living

in Japan. Now, I don't hate living in

Japan, otherwise I wouldn't be living

here, but there are a few things, a few

reasons why I don't like living here.

They're not really big or major problems,

they're just nitpicky things really, but I

wanted to make a video talking about my

experiences because isn't that what

YouTube is for? Sharing experiences.

I don't think Japanese food is bad. It's

okay. It's not the best in the world. I

give it a 6 out of 10 on the Daniel Food

Scale. Korean and Chinese food is much

better, in my opinion. The problem with

food in Japan isn't the Japanese food.

It's the food that I want to eat from—

fucking kill me. Oh, do this properly,

Daniel. We're making a serious video.

Shut up.

I'm so sorry about that.

It was just very rude of me. What was I

saying? Oh yeah, the problem with Japanese

food isn't Japanese food in itself. It's,

um, it's the food that's very difficult to

find in Japan, and I'm talking about,

talking about, um, I'm talking

about— where are my notes? Can't even make

a stupid YouTube video. Oh,

stupid.

Here they are. I'm talking about, uh,

baked beans.

I'm talking about baked beans, um,

There's nothing actually written on this

piece of paper. Fucking hell.

I want to eat baked beans and proper

bacon. They don't sell baked beans here,

you have to buy them on Amazon for like

$20 for 2 tins, and they don't sell proper

bacon. This isn't bacon.

This is just like some kind of fake

imitation ham pretending to be bacon.

Bacon isn't supposed to be sweet, it isn't

supposed to be Like ham. It's supposed to

taste like bacon. Why don't you understand

what the concept of bacon is, Japan? It's

not difficult. This is proper British

bacon. This is

how you make bacon. It's supposed to be

thick and salty and smoky, and it needs to

have a nice fat layer of fat on the side.

I've been to every single supermarket in

my area And none of them sell proper

bacon. They just sell this weird rectangle

crap that tastes like ham. It doesn't even

have the same texture as British bacon.

And you can't get baked beans anywhere.

No supermarkets sell baked beans unless

you go to Costco or something. How are you

supposed to eat toast without baked beans?

What is wrong with Japanese people? They

eat raw fish and raw horse. And they don't

even sell baked beans. Why? Don't even get

me started on crisps. No, they're not

potato chips, they're crisps, okay? This

isn't America. Japanese crisps are the

most bland tasting things in the entire

world. What flavors do they have? They

have salty flavor, sea flavor,

soy sauce flavor. No, stop! That's not how

you make crisps. Where's the cheese and

onion flavor? Where's the beef and onion

flavor? Where's the roast chicken flavor?

Where's salt and vinegar? Where's smoky

bacon? Where's barbecue beef? None of

these flavors can be found in this entire

country. Why? I don't know. Maybe because

Japanese people don't like those flavors.

How do you know if Japanese people are

going to like those flavors or not if you

don't even sell them in the first place?

I want to eat decent-tasting instant

noodles. I want Pot Noodle. I don't want

any of this instant cup noodle crap that

Japan sells because all they have is Salty

flavor and sea flavor, seafood flavor,

curry flavor. That's boring. Where's pot

noodle? I want chicken and mushroom. I

want beef and tomato. I want chicken chow

mein. I want Bombay bad boy. Where are

those flavors? You can't find those

flavors anywhere in this entire country.

For a country that's supposed to have the

most Michelin stars in the entire world,

I'm very disappointed with the range of

flavors that they have on offer here.

It's just unacceptable.

This is another reason why I hate this

country. Why do the garbage trucks play

that stupid song every time they come?

Don't even get me started on sandwiches.

Japan couldn't make a decent sandwich to

save its life. The sandwiches that you can

find in convenience stores are just utter

trash. What the hell was that?

Did you seriously just put strawberries

and cream into a sandwich? Anyone who puts

strawberries and cream into a sandwich is

just— they deserve to be shot. I'm sorry,

but it's just wrong. It's like having your

cousin stay over your house, and then one

night she sneaks into your room and crawls

into your bed. It's just weird. Where's

the bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich?

Where's the sausage and scrambled egg

sandwich? Where's the ploughman's

sandwich? Nowhere. Not here.

You can't find those here. You have to go

home, back to England, where they sell

decent food. Okay, that's enough about

food. Let's talk about sex. So let's say

you are a 30-year-old virgin, you've never

had sex before, and you're thinking, hey,

why don't I go to Japan and I'll suddenly

become some kind of sex god? And I'm sorry

to tell you this, but the only sex you'll

be having is with fat, ugly, middle-aged

women who who are very desperate and

probably mentally ill. And if you're happy

with that, then by all means, buy your

ticket and come as fast as you can.

You'll be drowning in pussy. One thing

that really irritates me about Japanese

women is for some reason they think it's

attractive or cute to talk in this really

irritating high-pitched nasal voice.

Is that cute? I don't think it's cute.

It's just annoying. It's also extremely

creepy when you have a 30-year-old grown

woman trying to talk like Pikachu does.

Japan is a very noisy place. When you go

to a supermarket or a shopping center,

they have the most irritating, repetitive

music playing over and over on loop. And

then on top of that, they have sales

assistants who are way too enthusiastic,

screaming at the top of their lungs stuff

like bargains or sales.

いい買い物しました!

いい買い物しました!

I'm used to supermarkets or shopping

centers where there's no music playing,

where there's no one screaming. Where it's

a very relaxed and chilled-out

environment. And then you come to Japan or

many other Asian countries and they're

just screaming all the time and it's just

annoying and irritating. Please shut up.

I also can't stand irasshaimase, which is

something the staff usually shout at you

when you enter the store, welcoming you

into the store. And I don't like being

shouted at. It's worse when you go into a

place like a sushi place or a big

electronics store. They have maybe 4 or 3

people standing at the entrance yelling

it. That's their only job. There's 2

extremes to this situation. You either get

this really depressed guy who just walks

past you and then mutters irasshaimase,

who looks like he's gonna kill himself the

next day because he hates his life and he

hates his job. Or you get this really

overexcited guy screaming it at the top of

his lungs, who looks like he's gonna

climax in his pants every time he says it.

Can't they just not say anything at all?

Does anyone actually care if the staff

says irasshaimase or not? Even if you say

irasshaimase to the customers, They don't

say anything back. There's no response.

The customer doesn't say anything. If you

go into a shop in England and someone says

hello to you, usually you say hello back.

But in Japan, if someone says irasshaimase

to you, you ignore them. You don't make

eye contact. You ignore their existence

and you just carry on walking past them.

It's weird. I don't like Japanese

comedy or Japanese humor. I have to watch

Japanese TV every single day, so I've seen

a lot of Japanese comedians and it's

purely slapstick. It's The whole goal is

to make yourself look and sound as stupid

as possible to get a cheap laugh from the

audience. The whole concept of sarcastic,

witty, satirical humor just doesn't exist

in this country. You need to have the

sense of humor of a 10-year-old to even

find any of it remotely funny. If I try

and sit down and watch a Japanese comedian

to try and understand what's funny about

it, I just— I don't get it. I just feel

very angry inside and— it's not funny,

it's just stupid.

Oh, that looks— I'm

making beef and vegetable stir-fry for

586 yen beef

steak. It's beautiful.