Why I have no Friends in Thailand

I've been living in Thailand for about

over a year now, and it's kind of

embarrassing, but I don't actually have a

single friend here. I guess that's kind of

weird. If people ask me if I have any

friends here and I say no, I feel like

that's kind of strange because why

wouldn't I have any friends? Is there

something wrong with me? Do people just

dislike me for some reason? It makes it

kind of seem like I'm really antisocial or

I hate people or something, which is

completely not true. It's not that I don't

want friends. It's just I'm kind of a very

socially awkward person and I don't have

very good communication skills. I'm not

very good at holding a conversation. And

when I do have to talk to people face to

face, it takes a while for me to actually

get comfortable and become kind of chatty.

It also doesn't really help that most of

my hobbies are things that I do inside by

myself. They're very solitary hobbies.

Things like I have a fish tank, which I'm

quite interested in. I'm interested in

video games and gaming, which I do by

myself. I'm interested in investing and

the stock market and also, you know,

taking videos for my YouTube channel. And

all these things, I don't really need

friends to be able to do them. I can do

them by myself quite happily. But

sometimes I do feel like it could be nice

to have a friend who lives in Bangkok and

we could like meet up and chat about

things, maybe do some kind of activity

together or go somewhere together. I guess

you could say I just haven't really been

that interested in making friends enough

to make me want to try and put effort into

creating friendships here. So I started to

go to a Thai language school around last

year, around July, and I was actually kind

of excited to start going to Thai language

school because I thought I could make some

friends there and then have people that—

who actually live in Thailand long term

that I could hang out with. And in the

first month of the class, it was class

level 1 of the class, so everyone was new

to the class, everyone were beginners,

and there were a few Americans there that

I started chatting to. And there American

guy there who was also called Dan. And one

time we took the train, we were on the

same train at the same time, so we started

talking. And I did quite like talking to

him, and he was around the same age as me,

and he was quite friendly. So I thought,

yeah, he could be a potential friend. But

then I find out that he's actually going

back to America the next month, and he

only signed up to the school to do level

1, do 1 month of Thai lessons, and then

he's going to go back to America and then

come back to Thailand the next year. And

then it kind of made me think that most of

these people in the class are not really

going to stay here for very long. They're

going to leave after a couple months or

maybe a few months, and then I won't ever

see them again. So I felt like it's kind

of like a waste of time and effort to try

and create some kind of friendship with

them if they're just going to leave

Thailand after not a very long time. So in

the beginning, in level 1 of Thai lessons,

I was quite enthusiastic about chatting to

people and getting to know people. But

then as the months go by and people kept

leaving and new people kept placing them,

I kind of gave up on the idea and I just

kind of became reclusive and I stuck to

myself. I didn't really try to talk to

anyone because it felt like what was the

point if they were just going to leave the

next month? On the 3rd month in class 3,

there was a Japanese guy in the classroom

and I really wanted to talk to him because

I lived in Japan for a couple years some

time ago and I speak Japanese as well. So

I kind of was interested in talking to

him, but then I find out that he's

actually going back to Tokyo the next

month. And then I was like, I knew it.

Then something kind of tragic happened on

the 4th month. This new girl came to the

class. A bunch of new people came and

joined my class. One of them was this

British girl who was like early 20s,

quite attractive. And I was like, oh,

thank God. The gods have blessed me and

given me someone to talk to. And after

about a week, she finally started to talk

to me. She would just like suddenly

randomly come up to me and start chatting

and we chatted maybe 3 times, and I really

wasn't expecting this because most people

at the school didn't really try to talk to

me, I guess because I look kind of

unfriendly because I was very reclusive,

keeping myself to myself. But this girl,

she actually would come over to me and say

hi, how was my day, how am I? And then I

felt like, yeah, I could be friends with

her. It was kind of nice to finally be

able to talk to another British person.

You know when you finally get to talk to

someone who's from your country and from a

similar area of your country, so you have

similar accents, you don't have any

problems with communication. And it was

actually really nice talking to her

because after being in Thailand for over a

year now, I haven't actually met or talked

to a single British person apart from the

time when my bank card got blocked and had

to phone up the bank, and then I got to

talk to another British person. Because it

does start to get kind of lonely when

you're living overseas in a different

country and you don't really speak the

language. And there's like this massive

communication barrier with almost everyone

here. There was one time after class had

finished, me and the British girl were in

the elevator together to get out of the

building, and she was standing in front of

me and I was standing behind her, but we

didn't talk in the elevator. And then the

elevator gets down to the ground floor,

we exit it, we head towards the doors

towards the exit. And then as we exit the

building, she suddenly does a 180-degree

spin and turns around, faces me, and goes,

hey Daniel, how are you? And I was like,

whoa, not No one has ever just stopped in

their tracks and turned around to initiate

a conversation with me like that before.

And I was really shocked and taken by

surprise. So I was kind of nervous and I

just kind of 2, 3-word answered her

questions, which kind of made it seem like

I wasn't interested in talking, which is

completely not true. I was just very

nervous and shocked. And then after the

whole exchange was over and I was walking

back by myself to the train station, I

felt so stupid because there could have

been a million things I could have said or

asked her, like, How are you? What are

your plans today? How's life? You know, I

could have said anything, but I basically

said nothing. And then I never saw her

again because tragically, I was quite sick

at the time, but I thought I was getting

better. I just had a bit of a runny nose

and a bit of a cough. And then the next

day I got really sick. I had some kind of

flu. I had a really terrible headache. I

was just in bed for a couple of days, not

really doing anything because I felt so

terrible. I even had a temperature and a

really, really bad cough that lasted for

almost a month. I couldn't go to school

anymore. There were only 2 weeks left in

my class, and it was the final class I had

to take. It was the 4th class, reading and

writing, and there are only 2 weeks left.

And for the last 2 weeks, I was so sick I

couldn't go to school, and I actually

never saw her again. And I did think about

signing up for level 2 reading and

writing, but I didn't sign up for it

because I wasn't sure if she was also

going to sign up for it. And I thought,

if I pay for level 2 and sign up for it

and she is not in level 2, then I just

wasted my money signing up to level 2.

And then when I asked the school if I

could join level 2, they said no. They

said it was too late because it was

already fully booked, and if I wanted to

do level 2, I would have to join the next

month class of level 2, but then she

wouldn't be in that class, so it'd be

pointless. And then when I go back to the

school to pick up my visa documents, I see

her going to the school as well. She's on

the other side of the road and I didn't

know what to do. So I went into the

building first while she was on the other

side of the road waiting to cross it. And

I get into the elevator thinking she would

also come into the elevator and would be

like, oh, hi, funny to see you again. But

then the elevator doors start closing.

And as the elevator doors start closing,

I see her walk past the elevator. I don't

know where she was going, maybe to the

bank or the ATM or maybe to the toilets.

And then my elevator goes up and I sit

outside the school waiting to see if she

would also come up and then enter the

school. But I waited like 10 minutes and

she never came up. I didn't know what she

was doing. And then I ended up getting

called into the school to do my visa

documents and do like a little Thai test

to prove that I've actually studied. And

then I finished my Thai test, but by the

time I have to leave the school, she's

probably already in the classroom. So it

was kind of frustrating that I didn't even

get to say bye to her. And I got so sick

that I couldn't attend the last 2 weeks of

Reading and Writing Level 1. And then I

never even got to see her ever again. So

now I kind of sound like a stalker, and

I'm rambling on and on about this too

much, but my point was that I nearly made

a friend, and then I guess the universe

didn't want it to happen. So yeah, that

was kind of frustrating. But anyway, I

finished school. I don't go to Thai school

anymore. I finished all the way back in

November, and I don't have to go anymore.

So I ended up going to school for those

months, met all these people, and didn't

make a single friend or exchange contact

details with anyone, which kind of sucks.

I didn't really find anyone in the class

that I felt really, really strongly to

become friends with apart from that

British girl. And me wanting to be friends

with her has absolutely nothing to do with

her being an attractive young lady. I

mean, I could be friends with anyone. I

could be friends with a guy who's fat,

who's not great-looking, or even a lady

who's not super attractive. I don't judge

people based on their looks is what I'm

trying to say. So although it is kind of

disappointing that I've been here in

Thailand for over a year, I haven't really

made any special connections with anyone

that I could call a friend. I'm not really

going to try and force it, although it

would be nice to meet someone who I have

similar hobbies with and we kind of click

when it comes to chemistry. We've got like

similar sense of humor and interests and

hobbies, and we can like chat about stuff.

That could be nice, but it's not the end

of the world to not have any friends