How I Manifested my Ex Girlfriend back into my Life

When you have such intense feelings for

another person and then you lose them,

it's the worst feeling ever. It was

horrible. I was depressed every day and

there was nothing I could do to break out

of it. I tried exercise, I tried digging a

hole, I tried talking to people. Nothing

helped. The only thing that helped was

watching these tarot card videos.

I don't know if I talked about this

because I was embarrassed about it. I

guess I can talk about it now. I don't

know why I kept it a secret. I don't know

if anyone knows about twin flames. So the

idea of the twin flame— I was so into this

last year— the idea of twin flames is that

2 bodies are part of one soul, and then

you're like half the soul, and then your

twin flame is also the other half of the

soul. And then you're like— the universe

kind of like brings you together, but then

because one of you has intense feelings

for the other one, it scares them off and

they run. So you have the runner and the

chaser, and then the chaser has these

intense feelings, which is what I had.

And the more you chase, the more they will

run. So you had to like train yourself to

stop chasing and to let go, and then they

will naturally come back to you. Like you

manifest them back into your life. And I

was obsessed with this. I watched this

channel called All Star Something, tiny,

tiny channel. And then he would explain

all this. There was this thing called the

Dark Night of the Moon where You

have like a mental breakdown after you

lost the twin flame. Yeah,

someone messaged me on Twitter saying that

they think Mila is my twin flame, so I

googled it and I found all these channels

and I became hooked. And I'd watch his

channel every night for his tarot card

readings,

and then there would be videos like,

today's tarot card reading, your twin

flame is thinking about you. They're

making life changes to re-enter your life.

They're doing this and they're doing that.

And I was hooked. I was addicted. And it

was the only thing keeping me sane because

I'd see the title of the new video and

it'd be like, your twin flame is

regretting leaving you. And I'd be like,

oh my god, she misses me. Oh my god,

she's preparing to see me again. And the

funny thing is, you might be thinking,

oh, this is all a load of rubbish. But it

actually came true. She did message me

again. We did meet up again. It was so

weird because I also think all that tarot

stuff is a load of rubbish. But then I got

really into it, and I swear

the night before she messaged me, the twin

card reading was something like, Your twin

flame is gonna message you out of the

blue. And then the next day she messaged

me when I was on the train coming back

from that Airbnb in Germany. She messaged

me and I was like, oh my God, she's

messaging me. I was having a heart attack

That was the only thing keeping me sane,

those bloody tarot card readings. I

haven't checked that channel since then.

I wonder what he's doing now.

Oh, he gained 10K subs. That's good for

him. Yeah,

he's still doing the same stuff.

Twin flames. Divine feminine is reeling

divine masculine in like a boss. I can't

live without you. DM bright future with

DF. DM worried sick about DF.

I wasn't sure if I was the DF or the DM.

I think I was the DF because I have like

feminine energy. So if you're divine

feminine, you're like the woman,

but also a man can, can be the feminine if

they have like feminine energy. But some

people say I'm not the feminine, I'm the

masculine. But I don't think I was. So I'd

check the channel and I'd be like,

DM comes crawling back. Oh my God, she

wants me again. I kept this as a secret

because I was so embarrassed about it.

And then I told Mila about it the first

time. No, the second time she tried

breaking up with me in Rotterdam. She was

at my place and she tried breaking up with

me and I told her about this stuff and

then I just burst out in tears. I was

like, I was watching twin flame videos and

I can't remember what I said.

What did I say? I don't know, but I was

explaining it to her and I just burst out

in tears. And then you messaged me and I'm

so happy. And I was just crying, I was

like this mess.

What a journey.

But the twin flame stuff's quite

interesting. But he said you

don't have to be with your twin flame.

Some people find their twin flames and

they decide that it's not for them and

they just go their separate ways and they

find a soulmate. So soulmates and twin

flames are supposed to be different.

I forgot what the difference is. He says

something like twin flames are not

supposed to be about being in love, it's

just about realigning

something, making your soul whole

again. But as soon as you get all attached

and in love, then It's going to drive them

away. If you want that, then you need a

soulmate. So all this stuff I learned all

about it. Kind of funny now,

but it's weird how it kind of came true.

Like, I did teach myself to

stop caring about her so much, and I tried

to let go. And I went to Germany and I had

some fun, did my own thing, and then she

kind of like magically came back into my

life without me really doing anything.

And I felt like, wow, did I just manifest

this? Did I make this happen with my

detaching And my soul-searching

journey. It was weird.

I don't know what I think about it now. I

think it's cute. I don't know if I even

believe it though.

But then when I searched the comments,

twin flames, I found some really old

comments saying— some people were saying

Chihiro, they think Chihiro was my twin

flame. I don't know about that. I

definitely didn't have really intense

feelings for Chihiro like I had for Mina.

I had the most intense emotions and

feelings for Mina that I had never

experienced before.

Being— when she dumped me the first time,

it was like soul-destroying.

I felt like my, my whole self was

being destroyed. They call it

the ego death. Like your ego, you got,

you got rejected so badly and it hurt you

so much, your ego just died. And you feel

like this empty shell of yourself.

They explain it all in The Power of Now,

how your ego dies and then

you kind of rebuild yourself.

I suppose it was a bit interesting. I did

read all of The Power of Now. Well, I

listened to the audiobook.

She wouldn't believe me. She kept asking

me, did you really? She actually asked me

to read Power of Now. So I looked up the

audiobook and I said to her, yeah, I did

listen to the whole thing. But she kept

doubting me, saying, did you really? Did

you really read it? I did.

What's the tarot channel called? I'm not

sure if I should say. I don't want a bunch

of weirdos going there spamming him.

He's a nice guy, and it's a small

channel, so, you know, he would notice if

he started getting weird comments.

There were a few channels. I watched this

one guy and then there were a few girls.

But yeah, it really helped me cope with

it. It was like

giving me hope that this wasn't the end,

that I'll see her again.

I guess I could tell you. It's called New

World All-Star. He's got 34K

subs.

Look up his video about— what was it

called?

I forgot. It's like Dark Soul of the Night

or something. Or was it Dark Moon?

Yeah, Dark Nights of the Soul, Twin

Flames. That one, I watched it and

he was describing every emotion I was

feeling. I felt like he was— I

felt like I could relate to everything he

Do I feel like the woman in the

relationship? Yeah, sometimes I do.

Because all the comments in his videos are

women. They're all women,

all heartbroken women who got dumped, and

they were saying stuff like, oh, my man

didn't text me today. Oh, I can't stop

thinking about my man. It was— I bet the

majority of his audience are female. I

don't think guys reacts like that. I don't

know, maybe they do, but they act all

macho about it.

Do I regret meeting Miura? No, I think

it's one of the best experiences of my

life. I definitely feel like having that

experience made my life more fulfilling.

It's moments like that, experiences like

that, that make life worth it, worth

living. You don't want to live your whole

life and not experience these things

because you're scared, and then you just

go through your whole life and nothing's

happened. You're like 80, and then you're

just looking back at your life and

thinking, wow, nothing happened that

really had a big effect on me. That's just

sad. I think having these experiences,

that's what life's for. Even if it ends,

you know, it's gonna end, and nothing

lasts forever. Even if you get married

and you live together 40 years and then

she dies, it comes to an end.

It definitely was probably the most

powerful experience I ever had.