Feeling Depressed And Hungry

Hello everyone,

it's me again.

My leg still hurts. It's been like a week

or 2 now, been having this joint pain.

Usually it goes away in a few days. I

don't know why it still hurts.

Very strange.

I don't really know what triggers it.

I played New World all day long for like 4

days straight. I need a break from it. 4

days straight. Last time I streamed was

Friday, and then Saturday, Sunday,

Monday, and all of today I just played New

World. Video game addiction.

The game's really good though,

it's really fun,

but it feels a bit like there's less

people playing it now. I hope it doesn't

I feel like the, the number of players is

slipping a little bit.

My second channel is doing well. I don't

know if you've noticed,

my, my Back 4 Blood video review has

nearly 9K views now. At this

rate, Chef Daniel's gonna get more views

than my main channel.

Not really sure how to feel about that. I

guess it's good. It means I don't actually

need a fan base to get views.

It's just a bit sad.

Be funny if event— I, I think eventually

the Chef Daniel's gonna make more money

than hiding my room.

Because I just can't get any interesting

content to make, and, um, my viewers don't

care about anything apart from stuff I

used to make—

marriage stuff.

I talked to the Ukrainian girl again after

nearly 2 weeks. I thought maybe she didn't

like me anymore because she wasn't

replying, but then she replied. She said

she thought she replied but she hadn't.

We talked about going to a Japanese

restaurant.

Maybe we'll get 14K views again like last

time. I don't know.

I mean, that video does have the highest

amount of views, even if it's only 14K.

We could

go to a Japanese restaurant and I'll just

make a video in it, inside of it.

Hopefully the video would pay for the

meal. If anything,

what should I title it? Going to the

best Japanese restaurant in my city.

Not negative enough. Eating at the worst

Japanese restaurant ever.

How's Manchester? It's fine,

just nothing to talk about really. At

least in Rotterdam I got beaten up. Not

that I want to get beaten up, but at least

there was something to talk about.

Nothing to talk about.

When you run out of things to talk about,

what the hell do you make videos about?

Okay, 10 minutes on the clock.

9:22. So I bought a new sex

doll. It was supposed to be coming today,

but they sent it to the wrong post office.

And then they sent it back to the post

office. I chose, so maybe it's gonna come

tomorrow or the next day. It's a really

big expensive one, not as big and

expensive as the Japan one, but it's, um,

it's like 11 kg, costs £299,

and it's got a dick. So yeah,

OnlyFans peeps should be happy with that.

Think of it as an investment. I spent

£299, which is like $400.

Hopefully I make a couple videos out of

it, sell them for $20 each. That means I

only need 20 people to pay to

break even. Or I sell the video at $15

each, which should— I don't know

about the pricing because usually I do it

for $30 each, which is quite expensive.

But then about 15 to 20 people will pay

the $30. But if I made it cheaper,

would more people pay, or just the same

people pay? It's a bit of a gamble.

So I'm gonna strap on the GoPro and do

like a vlog picking up my love doll.

That's what I was gonna make today, but

Stupid Royal Mail can't even read an

address.

Better investment than stupid stocks,

isn't it? At least I'm guaran— I'm pretty

much guaranteed to make this money if I

get this sex doll and then sell it on

OnlyFans.

Unless less people buy it than I expect

and then I don't make the money back. I'm

pretty confident I'll make the money back

on it. Plus, it'll be fun because I kind

of want something to to hump and eff.

Gets a bit boring just jerking off all

day. Sometimes you just want to get on top

of something and eff it.

No boldness or beard today. I think that

clickbait tactic is kind of wearing off.

I don't know how many times I can use the

bold. Beard in the thumbnail to get

clickbait views. I need a new clickbait

idea. Meet Kevin dyed

his hair bright green. I think that was

his tactic. He actually dyed it. I thought

it was CGI or filter, but it seems like

he's actually dyed it bright green. I need

to do something drastic to hook people

back in, even if it's only temporary.

What can I do? Maybe I get a dress and a

wig. And then pretend I'm transitioning.

Because my viewers, for some reason, they

love the whole kind of— no,

what's the opposite of stocks, finance,

and tech? You know, the complete opposite

of that is what they like. So the whole

trans, gay, female,

um, you know, social kind of topics.

I reckon I could do some clickbait shemale

stuff. I'll get a wig and

I'll get like a little cute

dress or something, and then I could also

use it as a prop in OnlyFans. So that's a

double win— clickbait material for

thumbnail, uh, and,

um, oh, this is actually a good idea.

What could I call it? I think Coppercap

did one like this and he got a viral,

viral hit with it. I'll just copy his

title maybe.

Yeah, Coppercap's got quite

a lot of good ideas on his channel. Maybe

I'll pinch some.

I'm just bored. I've given up on the idea

of getting a girlfriend and cleaning up my

image. That's just boring. I just want to

do what I want to do and not care anymore.

Just get a fucking sex doll.

Whatever.

I'm hoping I can lift

it and bring it home because it's 11 kg.

I should be able to carry it because my

dumbbell at home was 11 kg and I could

lift it with only one arm. But this is a

large object in a box and my leg's hurting

and I've got to walk like 15 minutes

carrying it.

Also, Essex Girl deleted all of her chat

conversations with me. She's weird.

She must be worried that I'm gonna carry

out revenge. Yeah, well, I got your

picture, Essex Girl. I'm gonna put it in

the thumbnail now. Piss me off.

No more nice guy Daniel. She deleted

all of the Instagram DMs and then she

erased all of the Telegram DMs as well

because we exchanged phone numbers when

Pia was at my house because I was, I was

getting really stressed out with

Instagram, so I deleted Instagram as the

app for a bit, and I exchanged phone

numbers with Essex Girl.

Now all the DMs are gone. I don't know

what's wrong with her. How hot is the

Essex Girl? She's pretty attractive. I

didn't know why I didn't go for her for

the first— at the first time, because I

was impatient. After the first date, she

said our next date will have to be next

month. And I was like, I can't wait next

month. If I wait for a whole month, then

my window of opportunity to get back with

Chihiro would close. So I wasn't

willing to wait a whole month just to go

on a second date.

I chose to go back to Chihiro instead.

That's why. But I always kind

of regretted in the back of my mind not

going on the second date because I thought

Essence Girl was quite pretty.

It's just I wasn't patient.

Oh well, I think I made the right choice

to go back to Japan because I ended up

going back to Japan. I made great content

with Chihiro. I met Ice Poseidon and Elvis

and had a lot of fun with sex dolls and

massage parlors. Staying in England to go

on a second date with Essex girl sounds

like it would have just been a bit boring,

even if we did bang. So I don't want to

live in Essex. Essex looks so boring. Why

would I choose Essex over Japan?

There's no place in the world I would

choose over Japan. So everyone keeps

saying, why don't you go to America? Why

didn't you go to this place or that place?

Because if I had the option, I'd always

choose Japan. Every single time. It's just

now I don't have the option.

Don't I feel like an outsider?

Well, yeah, that's the good thing about

being in Japan as a foreigner. You feel,

you feel special, like you're unique,

you're a special foreigner.

Whereas in England, when I chat to people,

I don't really have like a unique angle to

come from. So I'm just, oh, I'm English as

well, I'm from England.

The only uniqueness I can provide is,

well, I'm in Manchester and I'm from Kent,

so I'm new here. But it's not really very

new anymore, is it?

Just feel like I've got more— I'm more of

an interesting person to a Japanese person

than I am to an English person.

You're not going to video yourself with

the doll? Well, in the YouTube vlog, my

plan is I'm going to go and pick it up,

bring it back home, and then unbox it and

then blur it out. So you'll hear my

reactions to unboxing it, but obviously I

can't show it. And then I'll do a sneaky,

here's my OnlyFans if you want to see the

rest. Or I could promote my Instagram.

I'm dropping numbers on Instagram, people

are unfollowing me, social media is all

dying.

Can say, if you want to see the real

thing, then I'm going to put pictures on

Instagram. Maybe I'll get Some new

Instagram followers.

I just don't have the willpower to meet

people anymore. I've been chatting to this

38-year-old English woman and she seems

quite interested in me and she looks okay.

She said we could meet up, but number one,

I've still got really bad pimples. I just

can't seem to get rid of the bloody

pimples. Look.

You can't really see it that much, but

there's like a big one here and then a big

one there. I just

can't get my face to look nice.

I don't know what to do. I cut out Hyul.

I got face wash. I got acne treatment

thing. I'm washing my face every day now.

I changed my bedsheets, my pillowcase.

I just really don't know. My skin just—

it heals and then more new ones just pop

up to replace the ones that have healed.

It's never-ending.

So I don't really want to go on dates when

my face looks like bloody pizza.

It's never been this bad before. I just

don't get it.

My diet? I don't really know what's so bad

about my diet. For lunch, I have a

sandwich, cucumber salad and chorizo

or some kind of Italian ham sandwich with

mayonnaise, and then I have pickled onion

crisps.

And then for dinner, I usually have rice

and some kind of meat and

some vegetables. It's not a really bad

diet. It's not like I'm having McDonald's

every day. I'm not having pizza every day.

I don't drink beer. There's people

out there who have way worse diets than me

and have great skin. I just don't

understand. I thought maybe

it's because I wasn't washing my cup. And

if you keep drinking from the same place

without washing the cup, then this edge

might get dirty, and then you're pressing

it against your— the sides of your lips.

So I started washing my cup as well.

Hopefully that makes a difference. I don't

know what to do. Just trying to improve my

hygiene overall, see if it helps,

because at this rate Even if there is

someone who wants to meet, I don't really

want to meet them. So I just don't really

feel great about myself. I made the rice

too wet. Why is it so wet?

Put 2 cups and I put 10 minutes.

Um.

Clean your camera lens.

How's that? Yeah, I noticed that during

when I made videos, when I sometimes

I touch the lens by accident and smudge

it, and then it's all fuzzy, and then I

wipe it, and then the video looks way

Oh no, I ruined the rice today. It's all

wet. Why is it so wet this time?

Must have put too much water.

What to do? How can I fix it? Maybe if I

just heat it up and let, let it cook.

Maybe some of the moisture will evaporate

Stupid rice. You can hear music

in the background. Yes, a neighbor playing

the same thing every time he plays. He

plays only 3 different songs. This one

that goes doo doo doo. Doo doo

doo. Sounds like stupid ringtone stuck on

loop. Rubbish music taste.

He's probably doing weed or something,

just blown out of his mind on his sofa

listening to that beat.

You're gonna get risotto. Yeah, maybe.

This is the annoying thing about rice.

When pasta— when you cook pasta, there's

no such thing as putting too much water.

You just drain the water. But with rice,

you can't really drain. I could pat the

rice dry, maybe.

Porridgey. Is the music played all day?

Sometimes it's just a few hours in the

afternoon or in the evening. It's not

really all day. It's not that bad because

my laptop's so noisy now. I found out how

to boost the CPU to get better

performance. That means the fans are

really loud, so I can't hear anything.

Fans are just like vacuum cleaner.

Thoughts on Joey's video? Who's Joey?

There's only one guy who keeps making

videos about me now. He's that bald guy

from Canadia. I mean bold,

not bald.

I don't know why he keeps making videos

about me. None— it's not like I've got a

massive fan base that cares anymore. Back

in the day, you could make a video about

hiding in my room, you'd probably get 20K

views. Remember Kanaeito made that video

exposing me, and he got 20K views, and I

didn't even shout him out or anything. He

got the 20K views just from the big

audience I had back then. Crazy.

I think put hiding in my room in the

title, you're not going to get more than

2K views anymore. Irrelevant.

Oh, I wish someone would make a video

about me, give me some traffic,

because I stopped doing weird stuff. I

guess you gotta get a girlfriend and talk

about how boring she is. Why my girlfriend

so boring? She don't like Star Wars.

She's so boring.

Okay, I think that's good enough,

otherwise it's going to start burning.

I got kind of excited because I changed my

location to Ukraine and I was getting a

load of matches, but they don't talk on

Tinder, the Ukrainian women that I match.

They don't reply. A couple of them just

unmatched me when I said hi, and then a

couple of them don't even speak English.

So no luck with Ukraine. The Japanese

girl I matched didn't even reply. Why do

they match people they don't even talk?

Don't know what to do about dating.

Kind of fed up with it now,

because sometimes I think just jerking

off is actually better.

It's way easier.

You're muted. Don't think I am.

It's not muted, is it?

It's not muted, stupid idiot, saying it's

muted. Banned, tricking me.

Oh look, the rice is all stuck to the

bottom.

Look at

that,

stuck.

Oh no, how am I gonna

get the rice off the pan now?

I think the rice will be fine if it dries

out a little bit. Just leave it there to

dry out.

Did anyone check out that Charles Veitch

guy on YouTube? His, one of his newest

videos is pretty funny. He was just

walking around vlogging and he's very

loud. And then he walks past this guy and

the guy calls him a cunt for filming. And

then he walks up to the guy and then calls

him an effing idiot. It's really funny.

He goes around Manchester and he just gets

in arguments with random people.

You think, you think I'm rude and immature

and like passive-aggressive? You should

watch that guy. That guy does it outside

in public. I do it online to random people

in the, in the chat.

He just goes, he just calls people stupid

effing idiots and F off and stuff.

It's hilarious.

Imagine if I did that, I'd get beaten up.

He's this kind of smallish

channel, 170K subs. He makes videos in

Manchester. He's like this 40-year-old

Oh, look at this wasted rice.

Look at that.

Does he have a name? I just said the name

is Charles Veach, his YouTube name.

If you want to see Manchester and the

crazy people I

feel like he's, he's what people

expect me to be like, because when I meet

people in real life, they're kind of

nervous because they think I'm gonna be

like this weird crazy guy because I say

weird stuff on livestreams and videos. I

never say that stuff in real life because

it's weird. What's the point? If I'm going

to meet someone, I'm just going to be

normal. There's no point being a massive

weirdo if it's not to make a video,

because I just say that stuff to get

attention. I don't say it in real life.

So when they meet me, they think that I'm

going to be like how I am in the videos,

and then they meet me and they realize I'm

just like, oh, normal guy. But that

Charles Beach guy is probably what they

expect me to be like, just like telling

everyone to fuck off and calling them

stupid. I'm not like that, so I'm a wimp,

massive coward.

It's why I'd

never do like a podcast, because it would

just be really boring. I'm not

confrontational, and even if I disagree

with someone, I wouldn't say anything. I

would just nod my head and go along

because I don't want to have to have a

massive debate. And then I wouldn't say

anything very opinionated because I'd be

worried they would disagree with me and

then put me on the spot. So it'd be really

boring watching me talk to someone

because I just wouldn't say my true

opinion. I would have my true opinion,

but I wouldn't voice it until I get on a

livestream by myself. Then I'll tell you

what I really think. In most cases, I

wouldn't even tell you what I really

think. I'd be worried they might be

That is the problem. You've got to

be careful what opinions you put out

there,

because I always used to feel like I'm in

this special secret world on my YouTube

channel that no one in the real world or

my real life would ever find out about.

And I thought I could just say whatever I

wanted, my most honest raw opinions,

and then it wouldn't have any

consequences. Then I realized that

actually people find out what I say about

them and I should be careful.

Like, there's a lot of things I want to

say about certain people. If they found

out, they would be pretty upset, and then

it could have consequences for me.

That's the dilemma, isn't it?

Um, I can't talk about girls in

detail because they'll find out, won't

I've kind of had to retrain my brain to

stop doing that. You know, I remember I

made those videos about Single Mother and

Tomoko. No way I'd do that now because I'd

Okay, now we need to make the chili. This

time I've actually got chili powder, so

it's gonna be proper chili.

I can't believe how— I'm actually shocked

and kind of disgusted at how well Chef

Daniel's doing. Gets more views than my

bloody main channel videos do now. My New

World review has 44,000 views. My Simon

and Martina reaction video has 34,000

views. My Back 4 Blood video has

9,000 views. It's just kind of depressing.

I don't know why it's depressing. It

doesn't feel good. I mean, it feels good

because I'm going to make money, but then

it doesn't feel fulfilling like when I put

passion and effort into making heartfelt

videos. It's just, you know, I don't give

a crap about the actual video games, and

all the stuff I'm saying is a load of

bollocks.

So I just gotta keep up to date with the

new games. I didn't think the Back 4 Blood

video would work, but it did.

I guess there's a little community for

every game out there. What can

I do next? I know Warhammer Total War 3 is

coming out next January. Battlefield 2042

is coming out November.

Just got to keep an eye out for when these

games release, make sure

I get my review— first review out hot

off the press. What else do I need? Is

that it for the chili? Oh yeah, I got

beans and tomato.

Where's my knife?

Just got to find trending things and talk

about why it sucks. Don't know

why that gets views. People are stupid.

They, they go out of their way to look for

negative stuff about the things they like,

and they get all butthurt in the comments.

Just don't watch it then. But they watch

it. And then if I make a positive video

about it, then they don't watch it. So

who's the more stupid?

They just watch the video to cry about how

I'm stupid and how my opinion is wrong.

They keep saying, how's this a review?

You're just giving your opinions. Isn't

that what a review is? I'm reviewing it

with my opinions. Obviously it's my

opinion.

Why, why can't a review have an opinion in

it? Let me Google what review means.

Keep saying, this isn't a review, it's

just your stupid opinion. Duh,

what else is it gonna be? I'm not gonna

say, this is a video game and it's really

bad. Obviously, really bad is subjective.

It's my opinion that it's really bad. You

can't— there's no such thing as

objectively good or bad, isn't there?

Everything that's good or bad is someone's

opinion. So how can you give something a

score and say if it's good or bad?

And not be subjective and have it like

purely factual, then it's impossible.

You can't say whether it's good or bad,

then you have to say what's good. And I

did. I said the graphics are rubbish and

the gameplay is boring.

Stupid reviews.

Review definition. It says a formal

assessment of something with the

intention— no, that's not the right

review. A critical appraisal of a book,

play, film. Yeah, yeah, a critical

appraisal. What does appraisal mean?

An act of assessing something or someone.

Yeah, so a critical assessment is what

review literally means.

I was, I was giving it a critical

assessment. It doesn't say it can't

be based off opinions. Stupid kids on the

comment sections. Saying I

can't use, can't use my opinion.

Then what am I going to say? Hi guys,

this is a video game. It can do 4-player

co-op and you shoot zombies and there's 5

guns and there's a grenade and

stun grenade and there's 10 levels.

This game was made in October 2021.

Then you can't say anything about the game

if you're not allowed to say anything

that's subjective. See, I win,

they lose. I'm the smartest.

Oh no, I didn't charge my phone. I only

got 55% battery.

What to do?

Oh yeah, uh, still bits of rice stuck

to the bottom. That'll be fine. Why is it

hot? Has it been heating up on the stove?

Why is this stove Sit

off.

Okay,

so my plan is going to pick up the sex

doll, going to make a vlog. Hopefully that

will help for the for the cost a little

bit. Hopefully that'll help pay for the

cost a little bit, and then I'll make the

OnlyFans video, and then

hopefully Ukrainian girl, because she said

she's feeling a bit,

bit sick. Uh,

she doesn't feel great, so I'm going to

wait for her to get better.

Uh, said we could go to a Japanese

restaurant next time instead

of a Korean restaurant.

I need to get a selfie with her. I think a

selfie with her for the thumbnail would

get the views up a lot.

I was too— I was too shy the first time to

ask if we could take a selfie,

but I've met her 3 times now. I should be

less shy. I'm still a bit shy because

I don't really know what to talk about.

When we meet because I'm not doing

anything. People ask like, what's new,

what's up? And I just say, oh, I've been

playing New World 15 hours a day.

All I

need is a girl to make videos with, then

my channel won't die.

Oh, I wonder how many views I'd get back

if Chihiro made a reappearance. I don't

think we get 40K again. Maybe 30K,

maybe 25K.

Otherwise, I don't know what to do.

Someone's outside my door again.

Beep boop. I could make

such weird creepy

content if Chihiro was okay with it.

Like, um, stalking my ex-wife.

Can you imagine if, if she was okay

with it and I said, let's make this fake

video, and then I just follow her around

in Osaka and I like zoom in, I go, hey

guys, she's over there. I don't think

she's noticed me. I'm gonna hide behind

this bush. And wait until she's home.

I could make such good clickbait titles.

I need her on my side again.

I don't know if that's a good idea though.

What if people take it too seriously and

they report me to the police and police

thinks it's real?

I need like a disclaimer. To protect

So many good ideas if I just had someone

to help me out with it.

Wasted.

Hire an actress.

Hmm, but what if she charges like $100?

I'm not gonna make the money back. I might

break even.

I don't know why people take YouTube so

seriously. And then when you, when you

try and say, explain that it's acting and

it's fake, not real, then they don't

believe you. They say, oh sure, you're

just saying that.

But they— it's like the Onision stuff,

everyone thought it was real and genuine.

Maybe it's just because the majority of

YouTube audiences are kids, dumb kids

that got no brains.

You can have like a drama soap opera on TV

and no one bats an eye, but you do it on

YouTube and everyone thinks everyone

involved is like a psycho or something.

Why would you do that? You ruin your

reputation. Well, what about Phil

Mitchell? Do you think he ruined his

reputation? No, everyone just accepts that

he's an actor. What's his name?

Steve McFadden or something, that actor

for Phil Mitchell.

Can't even make a soap opera series

without people taking it too seriously.

Why is garlic so sticky?

I think they're all just majority mostly

kids. You look at the comments on my game

reviews, they're so dumb. I mean, they're

just kids, aren't they? And then you think

about it, it's kind of sad.

A bunch of stupid internet kids ruined my

marriage. All this

arguing was caused probably by a bunch of

stupid trolls that just 15 years old.

And then people like Mila and Chihiro

thinking, oh, these are legitimate real

people whose opinions must be taken

seriously. No, they're just dumb kids

fucking up our lives. And then you're

taking it seriously when we should be

trolling them.

Oh no, the opinions of stupid 15-year-old

kids on the internet really matters.

Not. Oh, thanks, Maxi. I don't

know if the people on CHD— what's

Chef Daniel? Yeah, they're not the same.

They're just kids who are into gaming. I

mean, if the video is about gaming, then

obviously it's going to have a lot of kid

comments, but the angry

comments just sound like the angry

comments I got on my main channel, which

makes me think they're just a bunch of

dumb kids.

If you think of it that way, it's just

kind of sad.

But if you think about all the stress and

arguments I had with either Chihiro or

Mira, just caused by these stupid kids on

the internet and not actual people.

It's like letting your marriage get ruined

by Xbox Live troll kids.

Oh yeah, you know what else happened? I

was on Amazon browsing randomly and then

something got recommended to me. It was a

fake ID card that had McLovin on

it. And it, I kind of,

it surprised me because, you know,

McLovin was that annoying prick who kept

trolling me with donations.

So I didn't realize that this whole

McLovin thing is a meme from some movie

from the early 2000s. So it was like a

movie called Superbad or something. It's

like a really dorky nerdy kid with

glasses. And apparently that's

McLovin and there's fake ID cards with his

face on it. No, I never

watched this movie before. I never knew

about this meme either. I got

a bit freaked out. How is this McLovin guy

in my Amazon recommendations now?

I mean, it's just some kid doing a meme

and then stupid— I mean, not stupid

seriously and crying about it.

Fucking hell,

talk about letting the trolls troll you.

Imagine crying because stupid trolls

trolling you.

So sad.

Even my mum's getting trolled, probably by

some stupid kid, because they don't listen

to me. I keep telling them, don't listen

to these people, they're just stupid

trolling kids. They think they're legit

genuine people who are concerned about

things. There's no such thing. If they

were legit normal people, they wouldn't be

on the internet doing this stuff in the

first place. They're just freaks.

It's just sad that I'm the only one who

sees it and everyone around me doesn't see

it. It's so frustrating.

Am I— it's like everyone around me is just

stupid and doesn't understand the

and I'm constantly having to explain to

Obviously someone like Mila would not

understand. I mean, she didn't even know

who Filthy Frank is. She didn't even know

who Leafy is. She has no idea about this,

like, trolling part of the internet.

It's like trying to explain to grandmother

about how the internet works.

Oh, oh, my eyes. Oh, it stings.

I can't believe someone has no idea who

Filthy Frank and Leafy is. How do you not

know about anything?

Well, my— I don't think my sister even

knows who Filthy Frank is, to be honest.

These people do. It's like they don't even

go on the internet, do they?

Maybe because I was really into that side

of YouTube, maybe Maybe

I think of them as more famous than they

actually are.

But come on, Filthy Frank, he's a legend.

How do you not know? I don't have a

chopping board. Ah, get a chopping board.

Ah,

honor.

Yeah, I heard about that because now

Filthy Frank is famous singer called Joji,

and there's loads of new fans of

his music that didn't even know about his

past in Filthy Frank.

Weren't they trying to cancel him because

all the weird stuff he did as Filthy

Frank? That's just Crazy.

These, these people don't know anything.

But it's also pretty impressive how he,

he managed to create 2 massive fan bases

that both love him for completely

different reasons. That's pretty

impressive. Definitely not

a one-trick pony, Franku.

I wonder what

he does like on a daily basis. Doesn't he

miss YouTube? Why doesn't he just make a

vlog sometimes or do a livestream?

Imagine if he did a livestream, how many

viewers do you think he'd get? 10,000?

20,000? It'd be such A rare

event. Just can't imagine it.

It's probably got like loads of friends

and social life. Oh,

there's ink on my onion now. Oh no.

Whatever. I think ink

is edible. Oh, my eyes are burning.

Why is Onion such a bitch to use?

Ice Poseidon's completely given up on his

community. If you've seen his recent

tweet, he's like, hey guys, this is a new

company, they're doing NFTs, they're

really good, sign up to them and get

discount. Then a few days later His next

tweet was, oh oops, it looks like they

were a scam. So sorry if you lost any

money. He doesn't give a fuck anymore.

He just openly scammed his viewers again.

I find that hilarious. And then he's like,

oh oops, sorry, turns out it was a scam.

I wonder how much they paid him to promote

that. I wonder if any of his fans even

signed up for it.

I mean, at least you can say, at least I

never scammed my viewers.

I'm too lazy to find out how to scam my

viewers. I don't even know how to. No

one's even offering to pay me money to

scam you guys. Not that I would, because

I'm such a wonderful person,

but if they offered me— I mean,

they wouldn't offer me much because I'm

not famous enough, am I? My channel is too

small. But if they offered me like $5,000,

I might scam you guys, just heads up.

But no one's ever gonna offer me $5,000.

They might offer me like $1,000, $500.

Maybe $500 they might offer me, but I

wouldn't do it for $500.

Oh, my leg is killing me.

I think it's been nearly 2 weeks of leg

pain now. I am a cripple.

At least people can't say, why don't you

join the army? I can't even walk. How am

I going to join the army? At least if

World War 3 starts, I'm not going to be

put into the military. I can't even do a

little jog.

Maybe I can, um, claim disability

benefits. Let's Google that.

My leg— you can so fake that. You go, my

leg hurts, can I have benefits? And

they're like, prove you're actually

disabled. It hurts when I walk, look, I'm

limping. How can they prove it?

Aren't you afraid it's serious? No, I know

what it is. It's just when I got

chlamydia, I got arthritis as well. It

didn't used to be this bad. It only used

to last a few days and then it wouldn't

come back for months. And now I've had it

consistently for nearly 2 weeks.

It's like, um, depression.

Can't you get benefits for being

depressed? So how do they actually prove

that you're depressed? You can just go to

the, to the interview and say, yeah, I'm

really depressed, I feel so sad, please

give me money. How do you prove it?

You can just answer the questions in a way

that makes you, makes you Apply

for depression.

I mean, I am pretty depressed. Do you

think I can get some money for it?

Give me money, government.

Can't be bothered. And then even if I'm

making money online, am I still able to

claim the benefits? Because I can't get

unemployment benefits now because they'll

see that I'm making money, then they'll be

like, you're not supposed to claim if

you're making money.

Oh, whoa. It's actually easier

to use scissors.

Oh,

for fuck's sake.

Oh, it hurts so much to bend down.

Aim it down, then it will not fly off— not

fly away like that.

Maybe I'll

get one of those table grills like I had

in Rotterdam. That was quite fun, wasn't

Cooking on the table.

I feel like I'm just back in Rotterdam

again, don't you think? It's not really

that different to when I was in Rotterdam.

Boring apartment by myself, cooking and

whining.

I mean, it was the same when I was in

Japan. I was just cooking and whining when

Chihiro was at work and making more money

than she did. I used to make like $4,000

a month. Sitting there whining about her

while she's working her butt off at work.

She must be so pissed that she comes home

more tired and stressed, and I've just

been sitting there doing a livestream for

8 hours and made like $400. I wonder

if she was annoyed. Might have been.

Yeah, well, it don't last forever, does

it? Wasted it all on CGs.

Feels a lot more open than Rotterdam.

Yeah, the apartment in Rotterdam was so

bad because there was no view.

You could open the window to the street,

but then you can see people walking past.

It's horrible. And then there's a view

into the garden, but it's not really much.

It just felt really, uh,

horrible. Not cozy. Yeah, that was the

word. The complete opposite of coziness.

It was so cold and horrible and just

didn't feel like a home. I feel

like this place feels a bit more like a

home. Why don't you get a pet?

Because then I have to— then I'll be stuck

here with the pet. Otherwise I wouldn't

mind a cat, but then I won't be able to go

Dump it outside when I'm ready to go.

Give it away.

I don't even know if you allow pets here.

There must be people here. I've heard a

dog barking from

outside, so maybe people do have dogs.

Not sure.

Maybe we can get fish again. I don't think

I'm a good fisher, you know, because they

My toxic death trap. Every morning woke

up, there were like 2 dead fish. The

shrimp just died one by one. The shrimp

were so desperate to escape the toxic

death trap, uh, they actually jumped out

the tank committing suicide.

Jesus. I don't know why the tank was so

bad. I was cleaning it every day— not

every day, but every 2 days. I was, I was

replacing half the water like Google said.

Took out half the water, replaced with new

water. I was mixing the water with this

solution to make it good for fish.

I was pumping it to take out the poop

which was creating toxicity. So I

don't know what else I could have done. I

had a filter and I cleaned out the filter.

They still died. Stupid fish.

It's not my fault. I didn't do anything

wrong.

And then all my neon tetra fish died

because Chihiro said the heater pump

in there stopped working. She didn't

notice, and then the water was cold and

they need hot water to survive because

they're tropical fish. And then she said

they all died.

I can't believe they didn't die when we

went for Christmas because we got this

automatic feeder that slowly rotated and

dumped out a bit of food. We came back

after Christmas and they were still alive.

And I had these really big shrimp. They

were huge, like this big. I was too scared

to take them out the package. Chihiro did

it for me. They jumped

out the tank as well. They were on the

floor when I woke up the next morning,

shriveled up.

Yeah, it's hard keeping them alive cuz you

got to look after the, the environment.

When you get a cat or a dog, you don't

really have to look after the air. As long

as the room's not like full of smoke all

the time, it's pretty easy

to maintain a healthy atmosphere.

But with fish, you got a tank and it's

very small. You got to look after

everything,

the amount of CO2, the amount of

chemicals. I tried growing plants

in there as well, but remember I got seeds

and I got this fertilizer pellets.

You're moving back to your mother's next

year? I don't really think so. I might go

to Greece. I really got to find

a country to go to next year cuz I'm so

bored here. I want to go to Greece, or

maybe— I'm not sure.

I watched Bold and Bankrupt in Ukraine and

it just looks so depressing there, like

North Korea. So miserable,

cold, horrible, like a wasteland.

No offense to my new friend Who's

What do they speak there? Ukrainian.

It's just a bit of Russia,

isn't it? Used to be part of Russia and

they became independent.

Now Russia wants them back.

Maybe it's nice in the city. I don't know.

Oh wow, thanks Oliver.

I don't know what any of that is. XDP.

Look at my beef, beef brains,

beef noodles.

Oh, it stinks. Why does meat always stink?

It says 18th of October.

Oh, that's why you gotta put seasoning and

herbs and sauce, because meat is

disgusting.

Reminds me of Korea when I bought that

steak. Remember that? Steak I got in the

Korean Airbnb, that was horrible.

It was minging. Oh,

I'm scared

it's gonna burn. Where's my oil?

Where's the beef?

Beef,

beef.

Beef,

a big butter.

Mm, beef and onions, delicious.

Beef and

garlic.

And then seasoning. Where's my chicken

stock?

Where's my chili powder?

And then some mixed Hard pizza.

Mixed beans and chopped

tomatoes.

I'm kind of excited about picking up the

Love Doll. Finally feel like I've got

something to do, something to vlog. It

reminds me a bit of back in the day. I

used to prepare something for. Video and

then go and do it, go and film it.

I used to be so ambitious, like buying a

tent and setting it up and doing all the

video camera angles, pretending to be

homeless. I went to such lengths to make

content back then, didn't I? Going to the

slums, going to those Japanese homeless

shelters. I got really

lazy because it's not like

any of those videos went mega viral or

anything. Didn't feel worth it.

Should I use all of it? No, because I

still got that left over. I need to make

another batch.

Second batch should last me 4 dinners.

This will last me 2 dinners, and I got

another batch here.

Here.

I need more— I, I need more variety in my

videos. I don't know what to do. I'm too

lazy to go outside anymore.

Because even when I went outside, it only

got 20K views,

25K. And it's not like the money was very

good any either. I actually made less

money from going out making

a video than just doing one sitting on the

floor. Because videos

about just going out and meeting people

don't get good CPM.

You need topics about something.

Crazy schemes.

What crazy schemes I used to have. Sex

doll? Well, I'm getting a new sex doll.

It's not really as crazy though, is it?

It's not like I'm married anymore. It was

pretty weird, you know, being married and

renting out an Airbnb to store your sex

dolls. Kind of funny, wasn't it?

But it didn't make any money because I

lost money doing all that. I didn't Even

break even.

Worst investment.

And back then I didn't even have OnlyFans,

didn't I? Now I mainly want

to get this new sex doll because of

OnlyFans, and I know it will make good

money, plus it'll be fun to use. So that's

the main thing. I want to actually use it

and have it, plus I think it would make

money. So yeah, 2 birds, one stone.

Oh, I got soy sauce as well. It was really

nice. I had it with chicken yesterday.

It's been such a long time since I had soy

sauce. The smell is just— oh

my God, it's like Japan in a bottle.

Smell of soy sauce and miso soup,

it's like going back in time 10 years ago.

First day in Japan, first time eating

Japanese food.

Nostalgic.

Give it a taste.

A bit more salt.

I think, and then it'll be fine.

Voilà,

finished.

Imagine if I dropped the whole thing.

That would be funny.

Oh yeah, I want to make curry next time.

I might get golden curry,

make it Japan style.

No, I haven't had any dates recently. I

got ghosted again by this Scottish girl,

just messing me about.

I wish these people wouldn't message me if

they're not serious about meeting.

I don't know if she's trolling me or she

just genuinely changed her mind and got

It's just irritating.

Apart from the Blonde girl. There's no

other girls who want to meet up.

Whatever, got more important things to do,

like getting my new sex doll. It's got an

8-inch cock. I'm a bit worried

the 8-inch cock might be too big. I might

have to use my scissors to trim it down.

I think that would work. If it's too big,

I could just shave down the sides.

Oh, it's too hot. Let it cool down.

I got— this time I got a male sex torso.

It's got cock and balls.