My wife is leaving me

Sorry, I'm late. I was downstairs.

Getting my scissors.

Uh, I promise it's not clickbait,

but maybe it is clickbait. It might not be

what you're thinking. My hair looks funny.

You know, technically it's true, so I

don't think it's clickbait.

Let me cut my hair first.

Lots of things to talk about. It's been a

few days since my last stream. We've made

some progress in the whole,

whole situation.

Do you like my hair?

I've been cutting it a lot.

No, it's not clickbait. She's leaving me.

She's going back to Japan. Okay, I'll tell

you why. Um,

she was going to stay for the funeral,

but, but she's just been very stressed out

recently and she

wants to go back to Japan, so she booked a

ticket yesterday and I'm

taking her to the airport tomorrow,

and then she's gonna go back by herself.

That was basically it.

So technically she is leaving me.

Don't, don't call it clickbait.

Problem is the funeral isn't going to be

for a while. We've booked a date for it

and it's going to be Um, middle of— middle

of March. You know what the depressing

thing is? The funeral date is actually on

the exact same date that we got married.

We got married in March last year, and

it's on the exact same date. I'm not

joking. Exact same date. It's actually

pretty near to my birthday as well, so I

get to celebrate my birthday And

go to a funeral and my wedding anniversary

all at once. Lucky me.

You can see my beard.

Does it look good?

I'm not gonna tell you the day of the

funeral. That'd be a bit weird.

I've been growing it for over a week now.

My mum said it looks nice. She said I look

manly. I had a weird dream last night.

Maybe I won't tell you.

What about my visa? I'm not sure. It

expires in May, so I have to renew it

before May. I'm not sure

what would happen if my visa expired.

Could I just apply for it again?

I'm guessing I could do— what

time is it? That's weird,

it's only 1.

I think it's better if she leaves because

she's, um, she's really depressed. She's

homesick and

she doesn't like my mum.

You know, a few streams ago my mum walked

in and then she said something like,

fucking wife, she never cleans. My wife

heard that. And now she doesn't like my

My mum has really bad mood swings. Most of

the time she's, she's quite nice, and then

when she gets upset, she goes completely

crazy and she starts screaming at people.

And that's kind of tough for my wife to be

around. Me and my sister are kind of used

I've had 2 huge arguments with my mum in

the last week. First one was because my

wife and my mum kept talking to each other

and they weren't understanding what each

other was saying. So I said to my mum what

my wife was saying, then my mum got upset

because she thought that I was blaming her

for something. And then a few

days ago, my mum said her friend's coming

over and she wants to use my room. Then I

got upset because— because it's my room.

I don't want some strangers staying in my

room. How am I supposed to do streams and

use my computer and stuff? And then she

got angry because I wouldn't let her use

my room, and she said, it's not your room.

It's my house now. It's not your room.

That's what irritated me.

So technically it's not my room, it's my

mum's room now, but I've been using this

room for the last 20 years, so

emotionally, sentimentally, I feel like

this is my room. It's the room I've used

since I was a kid, and I feel like I'm

getting kicked out of it.

I'm not clipping at it randomly, I'm

balancing it. This is how you balance it.

It might look random, but these are well

thought out, well planned clips and snips.

I know what I'm doing.

My lips are dry. I don't really know what

to do about videos.

I just haven't really felt like making a

video. I don't know what to make one

about. If I make one on what's going on,

about the funeral stuff and my dad,

people just go, oh look, Daniel's milking

it again. Using his dad's death to make

profit. What am I supposed to make videos

on? How can I just randomly

start making a video about something

completely unrelated when all this is

happening? And then people

say take a break. It'd be nice to take a

break, I guess. If I

was a millionaire, then maybe I could.

I think I'm just gonna ignore people. If I

wanna make videos about it, I'll make

videos about it and monetize it.

Why should I feel bad because people are

moaning about me?

I mean, look at the funeral company

charging us nearly £4,000 just to carry a

box to a place and then set the box on

fire. How can

that possibly cost £4,000?

We could do it ourselves. Just give us the

corpse, we'll make our own box.

£4,000.

What a joke.

They have flowers and they cost over £500

just for a bunch of flowers. Why don't we

just pick some flowers outside?

The funeral director came on Monday.

He's, um, he was a nice guy.

He just asked us loads of questions. He

asked us if we wanted to come and see Dad

again when they get him from the hospital.

And they, they said that they're not going

to do a postmortem. They said they don't

need to because I guess they,

they found out the cause of death, so they

don't need to. And we got the death

certificate yesterday. It just said cause

of death influenza H1N1

and then pneumonia and And then

multi-organ failure.

So it was a couple of things in the end.

And if you Google H1N1, it says that it

was— it's flu associated to Spanish flu.

And in 1918, there was this huge pandemic

called Spanish flu, and it says between 50

to 100 million people died.

Bloody flu.

And when you get cancer, you kind of focus

all your mind onto cancer and beating

cancer. You don't really think you're

gonna die to flu. I think that's what my

dad was thinking. He must have been so

distracted by his cancer. He didn't really

think of anything else that could have

taken him down.

The cancer wasn't really a problem though.

It was all under control.

Are you cutting your hair live? Yes,

otherwise I'd just be sitting here doing

nothing.

Do you think your dad died without regret?

It's hard to say.

I guess he had a lot of regrets. For

example, moving me to a different school.

Maybe I'll vlog tomorrow when we go to

London. It'd be a nice change of pace

instead of all these depressing

livestreams. Get out of the house a bit,

do some filming.

We're gonna go to a hotel.

Oh, and Victoria's parents came over a few

days ago. That was awkward. They didn't

say anything about the YouTube stuff. I

don't know who— who here remembers who

Victoria is? I'm not sure how new you

guys are to the channel. I think

it was last year in May.

May or June or April, I made a video

titled A Message to Victoria, and she was

this girl I had a huge crush on when I was

14. And I just said stuff like I had a

huge crush on her and I did some silly

things to try and get her attention, and

we switched phone cases. I didn't say

anything weird. I didn't say anything

sexual or rude to her.

But the one mistake I made was I used her

name, Victoria. And we're

friends, we were friends on Instagram,

and a bunch of people found— I don't know

how so many people found her so quickly.

About 100 people messaged her apparently.

Her sister sent a message to my mum saying

Victoria was getting hundreds of messages

from strangers on the internet saying that

Daniel made a creepy video about her. It

wasn't creepy, I thought it was cute. How

was it creepy? And then she

blocked me on everything, and then her

sister blocked me, and then they also

blocked my mum. My mum was a bit upset

about it, and they said, sorry,

Cammie, but we had to block you because we

were scared that Daniel was gonna go onto

your Facebook and download our photos.

Because I said in the video jokingly that

I downloaded all of Victoria's videos, so

media. I wasn't

really being serious. Okay, I have maybe

one or two of her photos on my phone,

but it's not like I downloaded all of them

and put them into a special file and I

masturbate them— masturbate to them every

day. So I just have a couple of her photos

that I downloaded. Don't look at them.

It's not that weird. When you put your

photos on the internet, you can't really

complain about people downloading them.

If you don't want people downloading your

photos, don't upload it to the internet.

As soon as you upload it to the internet,

then you've kind of lost control over

what happens to that photo.

And it's not like I did anything weird

with the photo.

I download loads of people's photos. I

have photos of Nobita, Chris Broad,

TerryTV, Ben Dean. I have photos of lots

of people on my phone. It's not weird.

Did your wife really leave you? Not yet.

We're leaving tomorrow. She's gonna go

back to Japan by herself. I'm gonna stay.

Have to stay for the funeral.

I didn't even use her photo in the video

though. Didn't show her video— her photo

in any videos, so I'm not quite sure what

she's moaning about.

Her parents said nothing to me. I was

sitting in the kitchen eating lunch. And

then her mum walked past me to go to the

toilet. She just said, hello Daniel, how

are you? And then before I could even say,

I'm okay, she said, that's good, and

walked off to the toilet. She's such a

stuck-up bitch. If you've

got a problem with me, just say it to my

face. Because I'm not— I'm not wrong. I

didn't do anything wrong. It's not my

fault that hundreds of people sent her

messages. Well, I guess it is, but it's

not my responsibility. So what?

100 people, strangers, sent you messages.

Just ignore them. It's nothing to cry

I don't really see what's wrong with it.

Who cares if you get some messages

from a bunch of strangers? What's the

worst that will happen? At least I didn't

use her photo in the video. She didn't

even message me. She could have said,

Daniel, could you take down the video that

you made on me because I'm getting lots of

strange messages? No, she just blocks me

straight away. Blocked my mum.

They didn't send one message to me.

If they messaged me, I would have been

cooperative and I would have taken it

down. I've already taken it down anyway

because, um, for some reason I

made a couple videos about Victoria after

it all happened, you know, milking the

situation. When you get a situation, you

can't just make one video, you have to at

least make a couple. So I made a couple

after the first one telling everyone she

blocked me, and for some reason one of

them got removed for inappropriate

content, and I didn't get a strike,

didn't get any message from YouTube. It

just got taken down for absolutely no

reason. It's a bit scary,

so just to be safe, I decided to take all

When am I going back to Japan?

Well, it would have to be after the

funeral. I guess I have to see how I feel

after the funeral. Probably be a

bit sad after the funeral. Might need a

couple days or a week to recover mentally.

Then I guess I'll go back,

make sure everything's sorted out.

By the way, it's not clickbait because

she's leaving tomorrow. I mean, how else

do you want me to title it?

Will your mum live alone? I'm not sure.

She has all these silly ideas right now,

like renting out rooms and building a B&B

in the garden. To rent to strangers. I

don't think that's a good idea. My dad

always hated that idea. I would hate it as

well, a bunch of strangers walking around

here. This place should be kept as

a special private place to honor

my dad's memory. All of this he built. I

don't want to turn it into some kind of

zoo or museum. Kind of irritates

me. Thinking about that.

And my mum's already talking about getting

rid of his furniture and getting rid of

his stuff. I feel like that's a bit

cold-hearted.

She was always nagging my dad about

building a B&B. My dad hates— hated the

idea. He always said, I don't want

strangers walking around in my garden.

Yeah, I wouldn't want strangers walking

around either.

I feel as if this is my dad's legacy and

that we should try and protect it,

preserve it, not start getting rid of his

stuff and changing stuff and doing stuff

he wouldn't have wanted. I guess I have a

very different

idea of what we should be doing to my mum.

But I guess it's her house now, so I don't

really get a say. I never get a say. No

one ever asks me my opinion. Everyone just

decides on everything. No one cares what I

think. No one ever asks me, oh Daniel,

what do you think? What do you think we

should do? Irritating.

It's like I have no say in anything,

ever.

It would have been nice if my dad at least

left the house to my sister. At least

she's sensible. He basically left the

house to the craziest person in the

family. I hope my mum's not watching this.

He didn't even leave it to anyone. He

didn't even write a will.

Now everyone else has written wills.

Victoria's parents said they wrote a will.

My uncles wrote a will. My dad didn't.

Right one.

There's no point telling my mum because

she doesn't listen to anyone, and then it

might just anger her and she'll start

screaming again. She'll just

say, it's my house, you don't like it, go

There's nothing I can say to argue against

that, you know. It's technically her house

now. I don't have— I don't have any right

to it, any say.

You are more worried about the house than

your mum.

Am I? I don't think so.

I'm worried about the house and what she's

gonna do to it. It doesn't mean I'm more

worried about it. Stop jumping to

stupid conclusions.

It's because this is the last remnants of

my dad, and I'm just worried about what's

gonna happen to it. I don't think there's

anything weird about that.

My mum should be fine.

She'll get— she'll get my dad's savings,

she'll get the pension, she'll get

bereavement pay.

She has all our family supporting her. My

sister's here.

Oh, now when my wife gets back, she's

gonna look for my sex doll, isn't she?

She's gonna take pictures of it.

And she knows where it is. I wrapped it in

a towel in the closet.

It's a pretty big one.

I showed some of you in the Discord

server. Cost about

£120, £150.

It's not a full-size one. It's just from

above the belly button down to the

upper thighs. So it's just like the

buttocks. Weighs a ton. Weighs about

4 kg. It's like carrying a little baby.

Should have seen the Japanese, the old

Japanese man who had to carry up the

stairs. He looked like he's gonna

collapse. It was so heavy.

Guy complains about mother when my mum

paid for the trip while costing 2K. Just

because she pays for stuff doesn't mean

she's a good person. It just means she has

money. And she's generous.

Yeah, she's nice, but she can also be very

horrible. If I gave you

£1,000 and then called you an ugly bitch,

would you still think I'm nice just

because I gave you £1,000?

Is the title clickbait or his wife

divorcing him? Why do people just assume

that because the title is My Wife Is

Leaving Me that we're breaking up, we're

getting divorced. I don't understand why

people just assume these things.

It's not my fault if you incorrectly

assume things.

I think it's a pretty accurate title.

It's not misleading at all. She is

literally leaving me tomorrow to

go back to Japan whilst I stay here.

How could that be more accurate?

No, it's not misleading at all. I think

you're just a little bit in the head. I'm

sorry, but if you just assume things like

that, then that's not my problem, it's

I'm shocked you are attacking your mother.

It's because you don't know her. Until

you've lived with her, you don't know

anything about her. Don't assume you know

who my mother is just from a couple of

videos. I've known her for 29 years and

she's not what you think she is. Trust me.

Irritating. People don't even know my

mother and they're trying to defend her.

You don't even know her. How, how would

you even know what kind of person she is?

I know my own mum better than any of you

do. Just because she's all bubbly and

fun in the videos doesn't mean she's like

that all the time. Trust me, she has an

ugly side. A very angry,

scary side.

She will explode over tiny things. Over

really silly things, and then she'll go on

a rant attacking everyone.

She exploded at my sister's boyfriend a

few days ago because she was making my

sister cry, and then my sister's boyfriend

said, don't be mean, Cami. And then she

started going on a rant about how she's

not mean after she just made my sister

cry. And then my sister's boyfriend left

and went back to London.

He just said, don't be mean, Cami.

We know a person looking at the way that

person acts. Yeah, but I haven't showed

you how she acts all the time. I've only

shown you mostly the good parts. And she

paid you 2K for you to fly back to the UK,

see your father. Just because she pays me

money doesn't mean that she's immune from

criticism when she does bad stuff. You

first said you were going to pay her, but

then you cashed the check. No, I paid for

it myself because I was going to pay for

it myself, and then a week later she

offered to give me a check and I said

okay, thanks. Stop twisting the story.

This is what's so irritating about people.

I was going to pay for the tickets and

then she offered to pay me a check,

and I said, if you're okay with it, then

sure, why not? I didn't make her

pay for it. I was happy to pay for it.

Yeah, I get very irritated when people

come up with these really dumb statements

that just aren't true. And they bring

up the, oh, she paid you £2,000 for the

ticket, that means that if she does

anything wrong, then you're not allowed to

criticize her because she gave you £2,000.

So if I gave you £2,000, can I say

anything I want to you and still

be called a nice person?

Don't be silly.

Look at my donation. Did I get a donation?

Oh, sorry, I didn't see it. Is your wife

really leaving? Also, I want to fuck my

wife. Um, yeah,

she's really leaving.

Tomorrow. It's time to say goodbye.

I'm just saying you're not respecting her

grief. You are blind. Don't you see your

mother's also hurting? Just because she's

grieving doesn't give her the right to be

really horrible to everyone and make my

sister cry and say mean things. We're all

grieving. She's not the only one grieving,

but we're not attacking each other. We're

not saying horrible things to each other,

are we?

Just because you're upset and grieving

doesn't give you the rights— doesn't make

it okay to say horrible things to people.

We're all supposed to be here for each

other, not attacking each other all the

Your drama is so boring and obnoxious now.

When was it interesting though? I don't

really understand why people thought it

was so interesting in the first place. It

was always pretty boring, you know. I

argued with my wife. I walked out on my

wife. I'm not sure why people thought that

was interesting.

Are you gonna do any walkabout livestreams

in England? Probably not, because I don't

know how to get Wi-Fi. In Japan, I had a

pocket Wi-Fi. I looked up pocket Wi-Fis in

England, but they're really expensive.

To be honest, I'm bored making videos

about Japan. I don't think there's

anything left to talk about Japan anymore

that interests me. Well, there's a few

things, but I wouldn't be able to make

them because I'd get demonetized.

It's very easy to say she's grieving, um,

you should be understanding that she's

going to be angry, but you try living with

someone like that who's constantly

insulting you. It's very difficult to

be that patient. It gets under your skin,

and she always knows which words to,

um, hurt you.

Well, she always calls me useless because

I don't know how to do things my dad used

to do. For example, car-related stuff or

stuff about his bank accounts. How am I

supposed to know anything about that

stuff? And then she'll ask me how to do

this, how to do that, and I don't know,

and she'll then— she'll call me useless.

Why do I have such a useless son? Stuff

like that really

starts to get irritating after a while.

I don't drive a car. Why should I know

anything about cars? Ask someone who knows

about cars if you want to ask things about

cars. I hate cars. I've never been

interested in cars.

The irritating thing is she asks— she

calls me useless for not knowing things

that she doesn't know. So if I'm useless,

what does that make her?

Oh, thank you, Drew. Will you please take

a selfie in front of the open casket?

It'll be closed. It's not an open casket.

No, I'm not taking any videos of the

funeral. That's just weird.

Although I think my mum's gonna take a

video. She took photos at my grandmother's

funeral, and she said she wants to take a

photo at this funeral. My sister said

don't take photos, and then she got angry

at my sister.

I know how to do lots of things. I just

don't know how to do the things that my

dad used to do because my dad did them. I

don't know how to chainsaw cut down a

tree. I don't know how to fix a car. I

don't know how to do plumbing. I don't

know how to do electric stuff,

but I know how to make a good, good

omelette.

With some basil.

And I know how to play Concerning Hobbits

on the piano pretty well.

People keep going on about needing to

learn how to drive. It's not— you don't

need to know how to drive at all. Just go

down to the train station. It only takes

15 minutes to walk there. It's not that

hard not having a car. I've never had any

problems not having a car. Just ride my

bicycle, get on the train. If there's no

train to a place, that's because that

place isn't worth going to. It's a shit

place. That's why there's no trains going

there. I don't

want to go anywhere anyway. There's

nowhere that I would want to go.

Might do a stream in the hotel today.

I'm not sure.

It's been a while since I did a hotel

stream. I miss those. I think those were

the most fun streams I ever did. It was

exciting, didn't know what was going to

happen, all alone in a hotel.

Good times, now that I think about it. At

the time it was stressful. And I was

worried because I didn't know what was

going to happen, but now I think back on

it, those are some good times, I think.

Can you please make me moderator? Some of

these people are annoying. Yeah, some of

them are a little bit. I'm not sure if

I want mods though,

because they end up taking things into

their own hands. Banning people who I

wouldn't ban myself. It's just a bit

stressful.

I'm wondering what should we do about the

garden. My dad always used to mow the

lawn, and he has this sit-on driving—

what's the word? It's like a driven lawn

mower. You put petrol into it.

But then you have to keep buying petrol.

I was looking at a wireless electric

lawnmower. Costs about £250, and it lasts

about 30 minutes before you have to charge

it. I'm not sure if 30 minutes would be

long enough to mow Mow the lawn. We have

quite a few lawns. We have that one and

then that one, the one behind us, the

apple orchard. Have at least 5 or 6 lawns.

I used it once when I was a kid. My dad

let me try it out. Yeah, it wasn't

difficult. You just sit on it, go up and

down, turn around, go back up. The only

tricky thing was revving the engine. You

had to pull on this wire and it, it

required quite a lot of energy. I couldn't

do it because I was a kid. Maybe I could

Yeah, I think so. Get some discussion

going. Otherwise, the chat could be pretty

dead if it was just a circle jerk.

Thank you, John.

I don't like circle jerks. I don't mind if

there's people here who disagree with me.

As long as you're not too irritating.

I don't really want to go to London, to be

honest. I'm not sure, it might be nice

actually. Have a bit of a break from this

place. Have a bit of breathing space from

my mum. I just

don't really like London.

There's something about it I don't like.

I'm not sure why.

It just seems a bit scary. I've always

been scared of London. I've always been

intimidated by it. I don't think

I've No, I've, I've never been to London

by myself. I used to go at least once

a year with my family to do Japanese

language stuff, go to the embassy and

stuff like that.

When was the last time I went? Went during

Christmas. We were supposed to stay the

night— 2 nights. We only stayed 1 night.

We came back home because we all didn't

really like it much.

My sister loves London. I'm not sure why.

I prefer it here. It's nice and peaceful.

Who's gonna pay rent in Japan? I gave my

wife, uh,

£1,000 worth of yen in cash,

so that should last her for a bit.

Considering my rent's about £250 a month,

it should last 4 months maybe.

I think it's enough.

I don't really know what else to say. I

felt like there was a lot of things to

talk about, but It's not really. A lot of

people have been coming over.

My mum's friends, my sister's friends,

relatives. More people coming over today.

It's getting a bit of, um, it's becoming a

bit of a headache actually. It was nice at

the beginning having people come over,

but now it'd be nice if things calmed down

a bit, but people keep coming over. And

then I hear the same story, my mum telling

them the same story over and over again

for the hundredth time. She's just telling

all these people the exact same things

every time, same story.

I guess it helps her. Look, I have my

dad's phone here. His company

wants his phone back. And I was a bit

upset about that because although, yeah,

technically it's the company's phone, but

it's my dad's phone. He used it and has

all his personal stuff on it, like emails,

messages, photos.

But the person who's in charge of human

resources is— I don't like him. I actually

made a video about him. My dad didn't like

him either. He's one of those people who,

um, what's the word?

They follow the rules 100% and

they don't like breaking the rules. So

he'll say, well, it's a company phone, so

your dad shouldn't have been using it for

personal things. That's what I can imagine

him saying. It's like

he's a robot. No compassion.

I think he was in charge of budgeting as

well. So my dad would order materials,

and if my dad overspent by a couple of

pounds, he would start nagging my dad

about it. You overspent the budget a

couple of pounds.

My sister said, what if we just pretend we

lost it? There's nothing they could do

then apart from look at this livestream

and then find out we've pretended. But I

downloaded everything onto my computer.

I downloaded all his WhatsApp messages

onto a spreadsheet so we can look at them.

Downloaded all his photos, so I think it

should be okay to just give the phone

back. I put everything onto my computer

now, but still, it's kind of sad. I'd like

to keep it. My dad always hated this

phone. He kept— he put a piece of sticky

tape here on the silence button because he

kept pressing it by accident. He would

say, oh, this phone's so stupid, I keep

pressing this button by accident.

And he never understood that you had to

switch data on when you don't have Wi-Fi.

I kept trying to explain it to him. You

need to press the data button, otherwise

you won't be able to see my messages when

I message you. I was

waiting in the airport when we came here

for Christmas messaging him. He didn't get

any of my messages because he had data

Also, my games. I made some iPhone games

on it, and I used his phone to, to test

out the games because at the time I didn't

have an iPhone.

And this is the only place where my games

exist now. I made this game.

It's like an endless running game, and you

tap— tap to jump. How do you jump?

You collect coins.

Took me ages to make that.

I made a couple games. There was a Space

Invaders kind of game, but instead of

aliens, there were zombies and you had to

shoot them. And then there was, there was

this Flappy Bird kind of game I made.

I'll show you my Flappy Bird game.

The music's funny.

You tap the screen— where is it— to close

and you just squish them. It's pretty

boring. It's not even challenging. You

just keep tapping it.

Guys, it's not clickbait. She's leaving,

so the title is My Wife Is Leaving Me.

If you think it's clickbait, then you're a

bit paranoid.

Should I go back to making normal videos?

I quite like doing the streams. I haven't

made a normal video for a while now.

I wanted to have a bit of a rant about

pension companies.

I'm not sure if people would be interested

though. It would be called Pension

Companies Are Scum.

It's just a bit difficult to get into the

video-making mindset again after all this.

That's tricky. Back to Tinder? No,

I'm a loyal, devoted married man.

I would say my normal videos were rant

about something and then do some cooking

at the end.

What makes more income, streams or videos?

Depends really, if people give me Super

Where were you when my dad passed? I was

right next to him.

I can now say that I watched

my dad die.

That was, that was a traumatic experience.

Try not to think about it though. If I

start thinking about it, it's just really

depressing. I just try

and hope that he wasn't really conscious

and he was just out of it and didn't know

what was going on.

Do you think I'm doing the right thing? I

should stay, shouldn't I? I can't go back

to Japan before going to the funeral.

That'd be weird. Everyone would say, why

hasn't Daniel come to his own father's

So I have no choice but to stay.

I'll do a vlog tomorrow, I think, you

know, to show you England, show you a bit

of London.

I'll title it— I've got a great title for

it: Saying Goodbye to My Wife. If anyone

says clickbait, you're not

banned. I was gonna say you're banned,

but I don't think I'll ban people. It's

not clickbait. I'll literally be saying

goodbye to my wife.

I think it's a pretty good title. Saying

goodbye to my wife, and then she'll be in

the right-hand side of the thumbnail, and

then my hand will be waving on the

left-hand side.

Funerals are for the living. That's so

weird. That's exactly what my dad used to

say. He used to say,

don't worry about what I would want if

you're planning my funeral. Just choose

what you would want. Funerals are for the

living. It's kind of true.

If I died and my family were planning my

funeral, I would just say, Do what you

would like. Don't worry about me because

I've never really thought about it. Would

I like to be cremated, or would I like to

Being cremated is kind of scary though.

You're being set on fire, then your whole

face is going to go black and then turn

into ash. I don't know. I don't know if I

would want that for myself.

Maybe I'd like to be buried, but then it's

weird, my body rotting under the ground.

I don't know.

Was my dad religious? No, he hated

So we're getting a celebrant. It's called

a celebrant instead of a priest or a

bishop or a religious person doing the

ceremony. We get someone called a

celebrant who's a non-religious person.

She basically does the same thing though.

Ah, it's just so weird that most of the

time I kind of feel like I've gotten used

to it, used to the situation, but then

sometimes I kind of zone out and forget

that this is actually happening, and then

I remember suddenly that it is happening

and it's a bit of a shock. And then I keep

thinking things. I keep thinking what

he must have been thinking when he was

lying there in bed.

Oh shit, I just remembered again. It's

just really weird.

It's— I don't think it's fully sunk in

yet.

But time does heal. I mean, the last

stream I did talking about it, I was

breaking down and crying, but now I can

talk about it and I feel quite stable.

So yeah, time does heal everything in

the end.

Are you afraid of death? Kind of.

I don't want to die like my dad did. That

just looks horrible. Weeks and weeks and

weeks in ICU. If I

died, I don't want it to be drawn out. I

don't want it to be a long process. It'd

be nice if it just happened.

Instantly.

I don't even know if my dad knew how

serious he was. On Sunday, he was saying

weird things. He was saying stuff like, I

must be really ill. And then we said to

him, we know, Dad. And then he laughed.

He kind of looked like he was on laughing

gas, like he didn't really know what was

going on.

It was really weird. One minute he'd be

kind of happy looking, And then the next

minute he would look really sad and

distressed.

What's the hardest part about YouTube?

Trying to get views.

Someone's here.

It's a constant battle.

It's a constant struggle. How can I

get views? What should I do to get more

views? Why am I

getting less views? All you think about

when you're a YouTuber is views.

It's not good really. Puts you in this

really unhealthy place mentally because

all you're worried about is numbers, and

then it sucks the fun out of it. Everyone

starts YouTube for fun, you know, you want

to make silly video, you want to do some

drawings, show people what you're good at,

share stuff with people, and people— you

just start it off as a bit of fun,

and then when you get— when you become

dependent on it financially, then all the

fun gets sucked out and all you're

thinking about is, how can I get more

views now? Why aren't people watching my

stuff? Why are people unsubscribing? Why

are people complaining? What can I do to

interest people? And some people are just

really good at coming up with ideas, and

then some people kind of suck and

Well, some people just don't have what it

takes.

What? What?

Who rang the doorbell? Who? Someone rang

the doorbell.

Oh yeah, stocks are on

the way. There's another stock.

You sure it's the postman? Maybe.

Who's here?

It's my uncle. He's nice. He's coming

around a lot to help us sort things out.

Um, my mum had to choose clothing for my

dad. They're gonna dress him up. That must

be a pretty grisly job. Funeral director,

they'll have to undress him. Oh, can you

imagine what his corpse looks like now?

It might be well preserved actually if

they put him in some kind of cooling

storage place. But we're going to dress

him up in his casual clothing,

in his, his trousers, corduroy trousers,

his jumper that he always wore.

Instead of a suit, we thought that he

would prefer to be in his clothes, in his

casual clothing.

Yeah, doing YouTube is very stressful.

I can't remember the last time I had fun

making a video.

I guess I quite enjoyed doing the tribute

to my dad video. I put a lot of effort

into drawing the drawings,

and I guess I quite like doing vlogs.

Yeah, I enjoyed making the Jun video.

That was fun.

I quite liked doing my irritating

customers video. Not many people saw it

though. The MS Paint one, that was fun to

do. Adding the sound effects and doing the

voices was quite fun. But it took ages and

only 10,000 people watched it.

Terrible, terrible performance.

I just don't really know what kind of

videos I want to make. The ones I

enjoyed making were things talking about

personal things and people I met, like

Victoria or my ex-girlfriends. Oh, oh,

oh, there is one video I really want to

make, but I'm not sure.

Um, I'm not sure if I talked about it last

time, but my, my granddad had a brother

who moved to America and had a few sons.

One of the sons married a Japanese woman,

and this Japanese woman is the co-founder

of some fancy big company called

Pixxon Imaging,

and she's very easy to find on the

internet. She's a doctor.

She has LinkedIn, all these professional

websites, profiles.

I thought it might be interesting to make

a video about that.

She even has a YouTube channel, but she

only has 2 subscribers. Should I give her

a shout out? That'd be so weird. Hi,

we're related to each other. How are we

even related though?

Her husband's granddad was my granddad's

brother. I don't even know how we're

Granddad's— goes Peter, and then he had 2

boys and a daughter. One of the boys

married a Japanese woman and

she has a daughter, 20-year-old,

22-year-old. I wonder if she's cute.

That'd be weird if I met her on Tinder and

we were related.

Maybe she even knows about me, my channel.

Maybe she'll give me a job at

PixOn Imaging.

She's the co-founder, and she's not

Mrs. Lord, it's Doctor. She's a doctor,

so maybe she has a PhD. She sounds very

clever.

What am I supposed to do for a month until

the funeral? 4 weeks of

doing what I always do— streaming,

making videos, playing video games.

I guess I have to do some gardening as

well now. I've never done gardening

before. How hard can it be? I'll just get

one of those clippers, do a bit of

trimming, and then— I'm

not sure about mowing the lawn. I don't

even know how— I don't even know where the

keys are.

Maybe my uncle. I think my uncle would

probably come over and do it. He's very

helpful. Her name is Chiyoko Lord.

How did you find her so quickly? I didn't

dox her.

Do you have a petrol lawnmower? Yeah, we

have 2. Drive-on ones. I have no idea

how to drive it though. I guess you just

pull, press, push, step on the pedal, and

then it goes forwards. But there's gears.

No, there, there's not gears. There can't

be gears on it. There's kind of like a

gear stick.

It might be to lower and raise the blades,

the cutting blades.

What's the weirdest person that stops by

at the petrol station? My uncle. My uncle,

not this one, a different uncle. He came

to the petrol station. He didn't even

realize it was me. He didn't even say

hello, and I was too embarrassed to say

Am I growing facial hair? I'm surprised

you can see it.

It feels weird. I keep touching it.

Maybe I should shave it off.

I was just curious. I want to see what it

looked like if I let it grow.

If I kept growing it, it would just look

gross. This is the only place I get facial

hair, here. Don't get any here.

I get a bit here as well.

Might go soon. I don't really have

anything to talk about. Maybe I'll just

sit here for a bit.

I don't know what to do.

What should I do with my life?

Tell us a funny story.

Um, funny story.

Don't really have any.

How can I get back to normal as quickly as

possible?

I want to get back to making videos. I

just don't feel like it.

Problem is, if I take a break, my channel

will die. I need

to keep it going. Can't just take a break.

I think my hair looks a lot better shorter

like this. It used to look so stupid. Why

didn't anyone tell me? I thought it looked

cool. I thought I looked like an anime

character with that long hair. It just

looked stupid, didn't it? At least now I

have kind of a normal-shaped head instead

of a mushroom. I look like a mushroom when

I look at my old photos.

Ah, so stupid. I actually thought I looked

cool like that.

I was very against having short hair. I

thought it was boring because everyone has

short hair. All men have short hair, so I

didn't want to be— I wanted to be

different.

I was so scared of cutting away this hair

above my ear. I have no idea why.

Now that I'm used to it, it looks normal.

Looks good.

Well, it's been an hour and 20 minutes. I

think I'm gonna go. I'll make

a vlog tomorrow when we go to London,

and then I'll be by myself again.

I think it's gonna be the first time me

and my wife will be separate for such a

long time since we met.

Yeah, I'll do a video for the next one,

so see you then.