poverty beef dinner-1007765544

Ah!

My fire. Stupid table. It's okay, it's not a real fire. It's a fake YouTube fire. Gonna make us a beef dinner. Beef dinner coming up. Should I turn up the volume on the fire? Oh no, I don't have a plate. That's okay, we'll make one. Why did I erase the YouTube livestream? I just got upset and decided to delete it. It's not your fault, I just felt angry. I feel a bit better now. Oh, I don't know what's wrong with me. Recently I just feel so full of anger and frustration. I need more snacks in my room. I've only got my beef jerky. I just feel so frustrated and trapped. And I can't do any of the things I used to do to solve this problem, which would be running away to Japan. My beer was supposed to come today, but it's coming tomorrow now. Are the hotels open yet? No, hotels not open until end of May or middle May. Let this cook by the fire. I don't have any vegetables, but the cow ate vegetables, didn't it? So this meat, this meat was grown by using vegetable power, so isn't the vegetables in the meat? Maybe I've got chocolate.

No.

I've got hand sanitizer. I didn't get any chance— oh, I got— oh, thank God, I've got seaweed. We're saved. I didn't have any time to prepare because no one bloody warns me. What's the point of having a fridge when I don't even know if people are coming or not, so I can't prepare anything? I need more snacks in my room. Maybe I should just have the fridge stocked at all times in case. My fridge is empty.

So hungry.

So hungry. I just don't understand some people! Trying to think of an analogy that kind of I can use to describe it. Without making it too obvious about what I'm talking about.

Hmm.

It's like, imagine you really, really hate dogs, but your roommate keeps bringing a dog to your place. And doesn't give you any warning, and they just do it suddenly. That's kind of obvious now. And even though you've told them like 100 times you don't like dogs, they keep doing it. I think that was pretty cryptic. Oh, I fucking hate my life. Didn't get any water! It's 10 PM. I think if I can hold out until midnight, should be safe to go downstairs. Just get a proper meal. But until then, these rations will have to do. And then I really have to sort out some kind of emergency snack system. Why don't I bring the pot noodles up here? I don't even have any drinks. I should have brought the pot noodle up, and I should have brought— I already got a mini fridge, but I didn't know Anyone was coming, so I didn't put anything into it. You should always keep something in there. The problem is it makes a noise, like a buzzing sound. I don't really like the sound when I'm sleeping. And I'm not sure what I would put in it anyway. I still need to be able to cook.

The food.

I don't know how people sleep when there's noise. I need it to be really silent. Some people have music on, don't they? This is toast and jam tea. I've got lots of tea. I need more water. Toast and jam would be pretty good. There's no way I could fall asleep if there was a podcast playing or something. I might be able to fall asleep to the fireplace sound, maybe, because it's like a natural sound, it's not mechanical. I saw Chris Broad's new video. It wasn't great. I'd give it a 4 out of 10. It was way too scripted, like they were trying too hard to be funny. That Pete American guy was just annoying. Why is he so energetic and happy? The whole Wakannai wordplay thing was just really cheesy. Oh, it's Wakannai. It's like Wakannai, which means I don't understand in Japanese. It's also a place in Hokkaido. Hahaha, hilarious. I knew they were going to do that because I did it before when I first found out about that place. Hokkaido looks so bleak and desolate.

Oh, I think they're coming. Yes!

Now I can get real food. Haha, food is back on the menu. Yeah, it's probably safe now. But my mum gets annoyed when I come downstairs as soon as people leave. Why would she get annoyed? Because she thinks I'm being rude to her guests. And then she keeps throwing Mida back in my face. She keeps saying, oh, when Mida was here, I was nice to her. Okay, I'm gonna make food and come back quickly.

I'm back.

Um, book. I thought there was—

scared me.

Stop playing the victim, you biatch.

Yeah, I thought there was a proper meal. What I got were these sausages. Better than beef jerky, I guess.

Also, how is your mom doing? Can I do her next after her white boyfriend is finished with her?

Shut up.

Where's the logout? Login. Okay, well, at least I got some fruit and I got some Jaffa Cakes and water. I think they barbecued it. They had a barbecue and all they made for me were a couple of sausages. Better be good sausages. I think they had lobster or something.

Look at that sausage!

Oh wow, they're pretty good!

Damn, homie, in 2018 you was the man, homie. The fuck happened to you? Nobody watching your vids anymore. Hahaha.

They made them a couple hours ago. It was so difficult because I was outside in the garden playing football when they came back, and they did the barbecue right outside the door. So I couldn't walk back to the door in front of them, so I had to sneak around the back of the house and walk all the way around the house and then sneak back into the door. But they saw me. I couldn't walk straight in front of them. I look weird. I don't think they noticed me. I'm not sure. Maybe. I didn't say anything.

How does it feel knowing that a stranger or other men eating your food? You're a loser, biatch. Hahaha.

Yeah, that's why I don't want to pay for food. Imagine I pay for food and then a bunch of strangers come over and start eating my food. My hard-earned YouTube money. A man is not going to feed another man's child. Feed your own child. You brought the child into the world. It's your responsibility, not mine. Why should I have to feed your child just because you can't get on with your wife? Stupid people having kids and then dumping their kids on other people. Sick of it. As if we're like an orphanage or something. Why don't women understand why men don't want to look after other men's kids? Women will never understand the dynamics of a male. Do you know why us men fight wars and work hard and sweat our bollocks off in the sun? To work and build and provide for our own family, not another man's family. We're not Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos. We've got limited resources. Why are we going to use our limited resources on another man's children? When that other man gets to have children, accomplish his prime directive on Earth, which is to have children, and then he gets to save his own resources by not providing for his own children, he gets to run off and make more children with a different woman. Screw him.

Your mom is more proud of those kids than she is proud of you. Shut up, you bitch! Hahaha!

If, if every living organism's prime directive for being alive is to gather resources and have children, Then why would it use its resources for another comp— competing male's children? Uh, it doesn't make any sense. Because they're your friends and you want to help them. That's why I don't have friends! Oh, these sausages are pretty fitting.

If you disappear today, your mom and we wouldn't notice or care about you. Just disappear, you bitch! Hahaha!

Why do I accept McLovin's abuse? Because he's the only bloody person who donates. McLovin is funding my lifestyle, $1 at a time. Oh, those sausages were really fatty and oily. Now I'll wash my scissors. Look at that sausage fat. On YouTube you'll earn more. I streamed for like 2 hours on YouTube earlier today and not even $1 Super Chat came. Not even 1 cent. That was on the second channel. Yeah, but still, it's probably the same people. Oh, I need more people! I made a mess! I don't usually have to use Streamlabs. You need a—

Your mama punani was fatty and oily too. Did you hear us last night, you biatch?

Need Mila back, Ultra Hero. Bring the fuse back. The donation sound is loud. Okay, I'll turn it down a bit.

How's work?

I'm really enjoying my new job. It's so amazing! I get to meet new people every day. Did anyone see Ice Poseidon's meltdown on Twitter? That was a bit of a surprise. I knew something was gonna come. I hope he's okay. Oh, thank you, Space Mongoose.

Thoughts on Eastern Europe? Bulgaria, Romania, low cost of living.

I wasn't sure if it was going to do it. Um, Eastern Europe. I don't know, it looks a bit depressing, doesn't it? Eastern Europe. Message Ice. I was thinking about messaging Ice and apologizing for stream sniping him.

Even when you fake your video, nobody is watching it. Hahaha.

Some really big—

You're at an even lower point now and will continue to go down.

Some kid called Karl Jacobs, who's like a big streamer—

Oh, go hang yourself, biatch. Hahaha.

Got exposed for stream sniping Ice. And got exposed for being a fan of Ice, and his fans were bashing him for being a fan of Ice because people think Ice is like a racist or something. So then this Karl Jacobs guy had to defend himself and say that he's not a fan of Ice and he doesn't like Ice and blah blah blah. And then Ice got upset because Ice has changed since those days. And he had a big rant about it on Twitter. Yeah, I'm pretty sure Ice doesn't even remember or care about the time I stream sniped him. Nothing interesting happened. Maybe he thought I was weird, but I don't think he, he would have gotten angry about it. Oh no, I missed—

Daniel, please acknowledge the gifted subs.

Sorry, I didn't notice.

I was trying to make you feel better by donating. Did you not notice them or something?

Because they all came all at once. Thank you very much, but for some reason I can't do the thingamajig. Oh, there it is.

One—

Streamlabs on mobile is weird.

What?

You gifted McLovin?

Loving—

what? Terry TV got the free sub! Where's Terry TV? Is he here? Look, does it gift the sub to people who are here or people who are offline as well? Gary mentioned it on his stream last week. He mentioned me. Oh, thank you, Carrie.

Here's a non-troll dono, smiling face.

Finally, nice message.

When will you hang yourself? Nobody wants you here, hahaha. Go and disappear. Go suck your dad off, hahaha.

Hahaha. Yeah, Terry followed me, but I don't think he watches. Bit strange. I spoke to Terry once. Remember when my dad died and I did a livestream? Terry was upset because I was getting donations. What happened to Terry? He disappeared again. He made a comeback and he was doing like the I'm in space reacting to drama. Oh, he vanished again. He went viral again. Something about Korean girls. Racist thing. Yeah, I feel a bit bad I sniped Ice because I was doing it maybe 30% because I liked him and I liked his content, and maybe 70 or 60% because I wanted to get views by using his name. So I was mainly doing it for clout, which is kind of a shit thing to do now that you see how upset Ice is recently about stuff like that. At the time I thought it was okay because I still Thought of Ice as, you know, old Ice before he got banned. You paid him back? Yeah, surprised anyone remembered, but I donated the ad revenue I made from it to Ice. It was only about $40. Yeah, I guess it's different cuz Ice wasn't streaming, it was Gary. But we didn't go there to meet Gary. I didn't even— I don't even know who Gary was. I thought he was just like a random guy Ice traveled with. Do I feel sorry for him? It's weird, isn't it? I bet Ice feels way more angry and depressed about his situation than I do about mine. Because he was like one of the most recognized names on Twitch. I was never really huge on YouTube anyway. The only thing I was famous for was marrying a Japanese woman and then Being a leech and cheating. After that, people just lost interest.

Is Ice and Gary beefing? NGL, Ice can't come back anymore. You're probably in a better position than Ice right now.

I don't think Ice and Gary are beefing. It's like Ice is angry at all of the Twitch streamers for not supporting him. I don't know how I can become popular again. I would need to have some kind of amazing girlfriend who But then if I get like a new amazing girlfriend, everyone will just come back because of her, not because of me. So as soon as she leaves, then they're all gonna leave again. That's why I was getting scared about Chihiro. I was worried if I made the channel too much about Chihiro, then people just watching for Chihiro and not me, and then Chihiro could make her own channel and then abandon me. Or we might break up and then people won't stick around because Chihiro's not around anymore, which is exactly what happened. Remember I got Chihiro to make that video and everyone loved it? She went eating that crab place. That scared me a bit, how much people loved her. That's why I said horrible things about her, because I was like. Yeah, maybe I got a bit jealous.

How is that Ryan guy surpassing you so fast? Nobita got even bigger and Chris Broad is mainstream now. This isn't fair.

Yeah, that's what I keep moaning about. Everyone blows up and gets bigger and bigger and bigger. I blow up and then I just stopped. I've had barely any growth. No, I've had no growth actually. It's just been stagnation. And shrinking. Oh wow, thank you, Mini Pasira, very kind. The difference is people like Nobita and Rion, they've got a niche. They make videos about Japan, so they just have to keep pumping out videos about Japan. And people who sub to them are interested in Japan, so they're not going to lose interest because that's why they subbed in the first place. And they just consistently pump out videos without— well, it doesn't seem like they get depressed or bummed out about low views. Maybe they do, but they just keep churning it out, and eventually A couple of them go viral. I'm not hating on them, I'm just jealous. I don't hate them, it just makes me feel sad seeing everyone growing and then I'm dying like an old man. I don't have a niche. My channel's not really about anything apart from— well, it's about my life, and if my life becomes boring, then the content becomes boring because the content is a reflection of my life. When my life is exciting, then people are more interested. It's a bit like stocks, isn't it? It's like investing in one of those Bitcoin mining stocks. If Bitcoin's doing well, then your mining stock's gonna do well. If Bitcoin goes down, your mining stocks go down too. But it's hard to want to do anything in life when, number one, you can't do anything. Because of lockdowns and you can't travel. I wish I had a bit of direction, some kind of goal.

Do you miss having Cesium? He was a big fan to lose.

Yeah, I guess so.

He used to donate lots of money. He was your sugar daddy.

Having fans like Cesium was nice because you get a lot of donations. I don't know why people like Cesium just started hating me. I think it's because of Pia. He probably was upset because Pia still likes me, and now he blames me for them breaking up.

RIP Frugalicity. I will miss him.

That Frugalicity guy was annoying, kept telling me to do options trading. I keep saying we don't have options trading in England. And then he kept saying stuff like, we told you so, when I said my stocks crashed and went down. We warned you they would go down. Well, thanks so much for warning me.

How's BNGO?

BNGO's not doing well. It went up to about $7, it dropped back down to $6. I should have stayed in Microvision. Microvision tripled nearly, and then it dropped back down 50%. Microvision's a bit crazy. If there was no lockdown, I'd be in Japan right now. I'd be on the plane, I'd be booking myself a hotel, I'd be trying to get on dates. I'd be in a Japanese hotel whining about how boring and lonely I am. At least I would try and make some Japan content, like Japanese fried chicken number 1.

Why did you ban people like Chawanai and other people on Discord?

Did I ban Charlie? I don't remember.

I banned a bunch of people.

I don't know, I just got fed up because it's always the same people talking and they don't seem to actually be viewers or have any interest, and they're just there chatting with friends. And every time I went on Discord, it's always the same people kind of dominating the whole place, and I got fed up with it. It's time for some fresh blood. They can join again if they have different names and I don't know who they are. Some people give you useful advice. I don't really feel like any of the advice is useful, really. What advice that are people giving that's so useful? They're just saying stuff like, you need to do interesting stuff. Yeah, I know, I can't do anything. That's the problem until Japan reopens and until I get vaccinated.

All-time high donator, ISNTEV and Cesium. I think there are some anonymous people who still really like you. Maybe they just don't want to get doxxed.

Why would I doxx people if they like me? I don't know how people get doxxed. People on my Discord were getting doxxed as well. How do you get doxxed? Who's forcing you to share your private information and show your face on Discord? It's really weird. Ooh, Jaffa Cake smells good. Yeah, this lockdown is just sucking the life right out of me. I had so many plans and dreams. About what I'd do if I got divorced. By the time the lockdown's over, my channel is going to be dead beyond recovery. I need to get back to Japan, start meeting people, and start having stuff going on in my life. Nothing was going on. How did I get stories? Most of my stories that grew my channel happened in Japan, or it was Japanese girlfriend stuff, or it was me moving to Japan. None of my content comes from life in England. Maybe a few videos about school. None of my content came from me just being at home. I don't really know why people are that interested in my life though. in the first place. Because when they found the channel, stuff was happening. I was getting married and stuff like that was happening. Now nothing's happening. I need to get married again.

What you need is to feature in your videos that Japanese guy that sucked you off. People been waiting for him to do a livestream or video with you.

Yeah, but I need lockdown to be lifted. OnlyFans livestream with the gay Japanese guy. I need some momentum, but I don't know what to do. No girl is crazy enough to want to help me.

I'd personally much rather be anonymous rather than be outed as some weird guy who donates.

I wouldn't dox my donator.

Tons of money to someone that the internet hates. Besides, you could one day just lose your mind and decide to dox your donators. Can't be too careful.

I've never doxxed anyone in my whole life. Yeah, even Chihiro admitted herself that she thinks she was the craziest one for wanting to help me. And being completely okay with being on camera. Because normal people don't— they're not really aware of the dark side of internet fame. You've got Chris Broad, who everyone loves, and then you've got people like Ice Poseidon who's got this really toxic community who want to see him suffer. Most of the entertainment from Ice was because people wanted to see him suffer, and a lot of my audience wanted me to suffer as well. They wanted the train wreck. They want to see me get kicked out and be on the streets and get banned. Even Mila probably wasn't aware that I have this kind of audience. She probably thought, oh, Daniel's a bit weird. But most people are not aware of this kind of community.

Chihiro is too old to find a man. She should just get back with you and tolerate your cheating.

I think I wouldn't cheat again.

At least she will have a marriage and husband.

I think I would be less likely to cheat now because I've had negative experiences with viewers, so I'm kind of biased towards— I'm kind of fed up with the female viewers, to be honest, who flirt with me because either they catfish me or they ghost me or they're just really flaky. And they never agree to meeting up. And then when I keep asking, they just ignore me. And then the ones that do agree to meet up are usually really annoying or mentally unstable, or they're like Mila, and then they get all upset because I've got some toxic viewers. So I sacrificed my marriage and life in Japan for a bunch of time wasters. Also, I'm not that obsessed with sex as much as I used to be. I still jerk off all the time today, but I've gotten way more lazy. There's no way I would do what I used to do, like getting on the train for an hour to meet some random viewer to have sex with her and then rush back home quickly before getting caught. That just seems like such a dumb thing to do now. I can't believe I actually did it. It's so stupid. I risked my whole marriage and life in Japan just so I could hook up with a viewer who wasn't even pretty anyway, and she was annoying. Totally not worth it. No, I'm mainly talking about people like Turkish girl, German girl number 2, German girl number 1, Hong Kong woman. She was a waste of time. Bloody Hong Kong woman. You may still run out of content even if you stayed married. Yeah, I was running out of content even when I was married, but there's other benefits for being married, not just content. But then there's also a lot of cons, isn't there? Oh, there's pros and cons to everything. That's why life sucks. You can never have pros, pros, pros, pros. There's always cons. Like, a pro for being my current lifestyle— pros: extremely low expenses. I barely have to buy anything. My mum would be happy with just like £200 a month. And I've got a great house, big garden. No annoying neighbors apart from gypsies. Bit annoying. And then the cons are sometimes guests come over and I feel annoyed. That's it really. Also, there's no excitement of living on my own or like making it on my own. And the con of being married was— I don't know, it just would have destroyed all chances of hooking up with a hot girl. Maybe there is a hot viewer who would at some point in the future hook up with me. You never know. And then the other con is living in a Japanese apartment is really small. And then the pros are it's really cheap, and then strangers aren't coming in and out all the time, and I'd have a partner, a wife. Everything has its ups and downs. Wow, these Jaffa Cakes are filling me up. I wish I didn't have to rely on constantly moving around and doing stuff to get views. Look at Ben Deane's channel, that must be so great. You just eat a pizza, boom, 200K views. Why don't I just do that? Make a new channel called Daniel Eats Pizza. Episode 1, Daniel Eats Pizza number 1. Daniel Eats Pizza number 2. I'm too lazy to start a new channel because the process of getting it monetized takes ages. First I need 1,000 subscribers, and then I need 4,000 watch time hours, which takes a very long time with only a couple thousand viewers. And then it might not even work. The channel probably won't even take off. Yeah, people like Ben Dean, Zach Choi, they really got the good end of the stick.

Sorry, but your hero wasn't that good looking. She looked used up, like stinky and dirty down there.

I think Chihiro has nice facial structure.

No offense, but why does your room suck more than all the other rooms in your house?

Why does my room suck? What's wrong with it?

First floor of your house is absolutely beautiful, and then the second floor looks plain.

Yes.

I like my room. Yeah, my sister's room is much better. She's got a balcony, she's got a good view of the gardens. But when we first moved in here, I was about 11, and I, I chose this room because I didn't want my room to be right next to my mum and dad's room. Because I wanted privacy, and I like having a view of the front driveway so I could see who's coming in and out. So even when I was 11 years old, I wanted privacy, I wanted to know who's coming in and out, and I didn't want to be next to my mum and dad's room. See how little I've changed since I was an 11-year-old boy? Pretty consistent. I want to know who's coming in and out at all times so when I go downstairs I'm not surprised. Could follow Andy's traveling route, but the problem is Andy is vaccinated and I'm, I'm not. Andy's like 44 years old, and in the UK 44-year-olds are getting vaccinated next week, I think. But I don't know about 30-year-olds. Wouldn't I like a bigger bed? Not really. The single bed's fine. Andy's going to Greece. I don't know if I want to go to Greece. Also, Andy doesn't seem to be afraid of anything. Isn't Andy short though? He's like 5 foot 7 or 5 foot 8, but he's really fat, so people aren't gonna push him about. He's also very aggressive. He's not like a wuss, so people would be less likely to attack Andy than they would attack me. Yeah, and he's also Greek, so he— I don't know if he has it, but I think he gets dual citizenship, or he won't have a lot of problem getting in. He also looks like a woman, which means guys who don't want to attack women are not going to attack him. I don't know if I'd want to go to Greece. It's got that crazy woman living there, you know, that one that keeps making videos about me.

Revenge start.

Isn't she Greek? She might track me down and rape me. Hello everyone, this is Passaphone. That voice is so annoying. It's so robotic, even compared to my voice. It's so monotone. Maybe I can live in Malaysia since I'm half Malaysian. Did I watch her last video about me? She's still making videos about me? Jesus. I don't mind it when girls make videos about me, but I don't like it when weird fat creepy men make videos about me. I don't mind it if it's a good-looking man like Elvis. If it's a sexy man making a video about me. But why is it always like creepy looking weird fat people like Hong Kong Guy who are usually the guys making videos about me? Even Revenge Star's gonna overtake me soon. Doesn't she have like 30K subs? What if Kanaito overtakes me? I'd be so depressed. Uh, why everyone overtaking me? It's just unbelievable, not a single one of my videos went viral. I must be shadowbanned. At most, I can do like a clickbait video and get some of my old viewers to watch it, but I can never go viral. Last viral I had was 2 years ago, the sex doll thing. Which wasn't really like a proper algorithm viral. Everyone else is going viral. Nobita, Sora, even Ryan Boundless went viral recently. Remember Ryan Boundless? He got 600,000 views for his Uganda video. And you'd think his channel was completely dead, and it was, and he still got viral, and he was hated more than I was. I am ugly, so now I'm going to make a video about you just to piss you off. Looks discrimination, lookism are annoying. Yeah, but I think most people here would be happy if a good-looking guy or girl made a video all about them compared to like a weird-looking guy who looks weird and creepy. My second channel had a viral— it had the cyberpunk video went viral. I got 100K views on it. So that proves— A lot of my video game reviews on my second channel got good views, like 50k, 80k, but nothing works on my main channel. I can talk about dating, life in Japan, marriage stuff. It's just so weird. Maybe I am shadow banned, unless all of my videos are just really, really bad. It's why I feel like giving up making videos on the main channel, just focus on live streams. Only make a video if something really interesting is happening, but just give up otherwise. And then just, if you've got a video idea, just put it on the second channel since the second channel seems to have more of a chance. I don't know why I'd get shadow banned, but I keep thinking I have been shadow banned because of all of the sexual stuff. Maybe it's because you have so many subs you don't watch. But then so does Ryan Boundless. Ryan Boundless only has 50k subs, but he only gets about 2k, 5k views, and then he went viral a couple weeks ago. Nobita has 800k, doesn't he? But he only gets about 10 or 20k views, but then he gets random viral videos as well. I made a random video on my second channel about how to use the iPad on the Switch, and it got 20k views just out of nowhere. That's what I'm saying, random videos that have a good idea do go viral on the second channel. But nothing goes viral on the main channel unless I name drop like Simon and Martina. It's really baffling. Remember when people asked if Chris was friends with Ryan? It was in a Q&A and Chris answered it, said, no, I'm not friends with Ryan. Can you imagine Chris saying that he's associated with Ryan? That would be like career suicide. He was so eager to say that he's not friends with Ryan. You see, that's my problem with Chris. He's so obsessed and dedicated on the idea of Becoming like a TV show that eventually makes its way to TV. I bet you anything Chris would love it if he could get like a contract on the BBC or Netflix or National Geographic so he can become a proper TV show and not just a YouTube channel. Chris looks down on YouTube. He sees YouTube as like a stepping stone. He even said it on Trash Talk. Trash taste. He would love it if he could get a contract with BBC and become like the next James May. Chris would do anything to avoid ruining his reputation and brand. You can tell by the people he chooses to collab with. He probably vets them to make sure they're, number one, very likable. Number two, um, he has good chemistry with them. Can you imagine Chris openly publicly hanging out with someone like me or Ryan or even Tiko Sam? No way in a million years would he do that. He wouldn't touch people like me with With a 10-foot pole. Because he would, he would, um, I don't know if he'd lose viewers, but a lot of his viewers would probably feel disappointed. They'd be like, I'm so disappointed in you, Chris, that you hang out with the likes of so-and-so. It's just very— what's the word— artificial. But they're playing the game, aren't they? Don't hate the player. They're playing the YouTube game, and they want— they want it all. They want millions of viewers, they want the money, they want the brand deals, the sponsors. They're not just here for 100K subs and a couple K every month. They want everything they can get from the YouTube game, and they're willing to do everything it takes. They're the ones who succeed. Oh, thank you, thank you, sexy girl. So sexy. Why is it not playing? Oh, there it is.

Hey guys, look, I'm a girl, I'm so hot. Everyone eat my ass and suck my boobs.

Suck my boobs. I like it when people say suck my pussy.

My pussy tastes like Pepsi-Cola and I have eyes like cherry pies. I am superior to all of you and you will bend to the will of my seduction.

Whoops, I did it twice. Why is it so laggy?

Hey guys, look at my girl, I'm so hot. Everyone eat my ass and suck my boobs. My pussy tastes like Pepsi-Cola and I have eyes like cherry pies.

Yeah, well, the problem is—

I am superior to all of you and you will bend to the will of my seduction.

The problem is, if you're like me and Ice and you don't play the game how it's supposed to be played, and you go for like the edginess and the rawness, you end up getting cancelled because brands, people like Twitch and YouTube, they don't want that kind of image on their brand. Look how quickly YouTube banned Leafy. Leafy was back for like 2 months and they banned him straight away. Almost straight away. Twitch don't want Ice back because Ice has all these toxic viewers. Twitch doesn't want these toxic viewers. It just makes them look bad and get some, um, less advertising. It's all about your image now. Remember All of the big brands like Coca-Cola, Pepsi, they were pulling their ads off YouTube when the Logan Paul thing happened. And YouTube and Twitch would do anything to prevent that from happening again. And people like Ice, and maybe even me to an extent, we're just risking the platform. YouTube loves MrBeast right now. YouTube are just promoting MrBeast everywhere. Everyone loves MrBeast. He's family friendly. He doesn't swear. He's not edgy. He gets amazing views. YouTube must be loving him. They don't need PewDiePie anymore. I bet YouTube hated PewDiePie because PewDiePie was also edgy. and made weird jokes about Nazis and Jews, but PewDiePie was so likable that people still like— love PewDiePie even with all that edginess. It's all about money, isn't it, at the end of the day? I completely failed at playing the game, didn't I? Number one, I completely destroyed my own reputation. I completely destroyed my own reputation by myself, voluntarily, by exposing myself. I didn't have to make videos about how I cheated. I could have tried to keep it a secret. I didn't have to make videos that made me seem like a massive scumbag. It's like I sabotaged myself.

I just looked at Chris Broad's YouTube channel for the first time and saw his latest Wow, what an annoying piece of shit. I really want to knock him off that mountain he is standing on. You can tell you how stuck up he is just by looking at him.

I was hoping my cheating stuff would go viral. I thought If I make a video admitting how I cheated on my wife, that's definitely gonna get a million views. Imagine how funny it would be. People would be amazed. Wow, this guy's cheating on his wife. But it only got 60k views and it made a huge amount of my viewers hate me and turn against me. Nothing I tried— I self-sabotaged so much to try and get another viral. Every attempt failed, and every attempt just drove away more of my existing viewership. Such a bad idea. It would have worked if I could have gone a bit viral. If I had a couple million views, I could have milked that cheating stuff dry. But yeah, I don't know why I self-sabotage. Because people used to like me beginning of 2018, but I got obsessed with drama because the drama videos were getting really good views. So my brain just thought, well, we gotta do more drama, and the people are watching the drama videos even if they don't like me, so who cares? Yeah, I mean, I think that's what people do. My addiction to YouTube. How my addiction to views, YouTube, destroyed my life. I wish I could go back in time and try it again. Maybe try a different approach. Make boring travel videos. I did try the travel stuff, and I guess they did work and people like them, but then I would have to constantly travel and spend all this money traveling. I also— I got inspired by all the wrong people. I was back in 2017-18, I, I was really inspired by Leafy and Ice. Remember I was trying to do commentary videos where I just attacked random YouTubers like Nobita? I took them down, but there was this phase I was going through where I tried Leafy-style commentary, and it just had some gameplay footage and random pictures, and it was just a voiceover, and then I would just start attacking people. I attacked Texan in Tokyo, Nobita, Rachel and Jun. Some people found it a little bit funny, but most people thought I was just hating on them and being hateful. But I was influenced by all the wrong people. I really like my Rachel and Jun video. I made like this fake Jun robot advertisement. Ah, I should have saved it. I put so much effort into it, coming up with the, the script and thinking about the entertainment And comedic aspects of it. I thought it was quite funny. Is your YouTube channel dead? Yeah, it's pretty dead. No one cares about what I have to say anymore. What kind of content do you wish people watched of yours so you could just keep making it again and again? I don't know. I ran out of stories, so even if I was going to become a storytime YouTuber, I wouldn't know what to talk about. My life has frozen, so there's no vlogging I could do. Maybe titty streamer sitting in a hot tub and half naked, or maybe just playing video games. I don't know, something low effort. That I can replicate over and over again. It's so difficult getting girlfriends. It's not easy having girlfriends for content because number one, you have to go and get the girlfriend.

Where—

it's like David Bond, how does he get the girls so easily? He has all these girls on his channel. I need that. He should lend me some of his girls. Maybe I can get that Nikki with the big boobs. I just can't get girls easily, and the ones who are interested don't want to be talked about. They don't want to be filmed. They don't want to be involved at all because they're scared. Scared they'll get doxxed or something. I think I'd like to do a travel series. That seems easy. Just travel to a country and then complain about it. You want to make money but put in minimal effort. Yeah, I want to do next to nothing. There's that channel, that guy who just sits there staring and smiling for 4 hours. I don't think I could do that, it's too much effort. Something that's really easy and doesn't really require any creativity or thought, but also gets loads of views, that'd be great. And something where I don't have to go outside so I can do it from home. I chose this stream over a movie. How does it make you feel? What movie was it? This is the Daniel movie. Watching my It's like watching my channel burn to the ground right in front of my eyes. If I could steal anyone's channel, who would I steal? I still think Ben Dean, or maybe even Zach Choi. I don't know, Zach Choi seems to put a lot of effort. Ben Dean seems to put less effort. In the food he chooses. It's not just normal food, isn't it? Like McDonald's. Ben Deen would be a good one to steal. If I could steal the audience, maybe Ben Deen. But then I've got to sit in front of the camera. I don't want to sit in front of the camera. I'm getting old.

Elvis?

No, Elvis is doing movie reviews now. I don't watch movies. I'm too lazy to watch movies. What does my ideal day look like? I think first I'd wake up naked next to a naked girl and she's touching my dick. And then we have good sex in the morning, and then we wake up, we have breakfast together. I make the coffee, and then she goes to work for maybe 8 hours, and then I stream at home talking about how amazing my life is, and I make hundreds of dollars during each stream. And then I have lunch and I play a bit of football. And then she comes home in the evening and she brings back really nice food. Or we go shopping and we buy really nice food and we watch a movie whilst having dinner. And then I do some gaming in the evening, maybe Rainbow Six. And then we have hot sex again. No, we have a bath, relaxing hot bath, and then hot sex. And then we go to sleep. That'd be great. I basically just described what my marriage was like. Oh, why did I leave? I'm so stupid. Apart from the hot sex in the morning, everything else was pretty much accurate. Because we had breakfast, she went to work, I streamed during the day, and then she came home, went shopping, we got nice food, we watched stuff on TV, and then we had sex, and then I played Rainbow Six. We played and then we went to bed after I played Rainbow Six. So that was pretty much everything I just described. Yeah, I have pretty simple desires. I miss, I miss enjoying the video creation process. It's just really hard to get inspired again. I watch Chris Broad's videos and I try to get inspired and think maybe I can do something like this, but number one, I can't drive. I'm not in Japan. I don't want to buy good gear. I don't actually care about traveling. So I can't even copy Chris and do what he does. Yeah, I used to be really passionate about YouTube. I'm not sure what I was passionate about.

I just—

I used to like telling stories, I guess. I think I've lost interest in it, just like everything else. I wonder if Chris lost interest and he's just doing it because it works. I was really interested in the stock market. I was learning all about finance. I was learning about inflation. And hedging and banks and about different financial systems. And I thought it was interesting when the stocks were going up, but now I just don't care. What do I find interesting now? Um, Hmm, I am not interested in any— anything. I got a bit interested in Andy, Andy Milonakis. I was quite enjoying his live streams. Would I like to be friends with him?

Um.

Maybe, but I don't think he would want to be friends with me. He'd probably think I whine too much and I'm too negative. Andy just seems like such a cool guy. He's not scared of people. He enjoys life. He enjoys good food and a good drink, and he travels. It's just like he knows how to live. Life to its fullest, and then he streams it all and he gets paid $10,000 every month on Twitch just for filming his life. But I can't imagine doing it. Can you imagine how stressful it must be doing streaming like that? You've got all that expensive gear And it keeps having problems. Sometimes he has problems where it loses connection. That must be really annoying when things go wrong and you're trying to stream. You've got thousands of people waiting and then you get stream sniped. You don't know what's gonna happen, and then you might be getting stressed out because it's raining or I don't know, anything could happen. If Mila wanted to get back together, would I take her offer?

Hmm, probably.

It would be hard to say no, but I'm not sure what changes I could make. I don't want to have to keep it a secret. If I had to keep the whole thing a secret again, that would just kill me. How am I gonna stream? I'd be like, hey guys, something really amazing happened, but I can't talk about it. Or maybe she would let me tell people I'm with a girl, but she won't let me tell people that I'm with her again. What conditions would I put in place to make sure she stays in her place? Uh, first of all, she has to get rid of the bloody cat because I want to travel. How are we going to travel with a cat? So she needs to dump the cat, get the grandmother to look after it. Number 2, she has to want to live with me. It's just weird why she wouldn't want to live with me. If we're supposed to be girlfriend and boyfriend and you're saying you don't— you can't stand being with me every day, then that makes me sad. It doesn't mean we have to be together all day long. She can go in a different room and do studies or whatever.

What's that noise?

I just heard like a ping sound. The Instagram girl, did I make progress? No, I kind of lost interest in her. I think she, she's tricking me. As I keep asking for like a video of her bum, she won't send it. She keeps trying to get me To send her a picture of my nude with my face in it, which I find kind of weird. It's a very specific request she keeps making. I'm wondering if it's actually a guy, like a gay guy trying to trick me. And she said we can meet if, if I go to Cornwall, which is like 6 hours away by car. By train it's about 10 hours. I have to go to London And then change trains and then 6-hour train down to Cornwall. So far away. I'm not going to go all that way there. She won't come to London. She said she has work. I'm not going to go all the way to Cornwall and then get tricked and ghosted and then have to come all the way back. I just feel a bit suspicious about her. And then she's not interested in any kind of conversation. She's just completely obsessed with sex. She only messages me stuff like, I want to see your dick, daddy. So I feel very suspicious if the girl— the only thing she messages you is just non-stop sexual stuff. That's just not normal. So I think it's unlikely she's real. There's no other girls. There was this Estonian girl who messaged me. She looks cute, but again, could just be another trick. There's already been about 2 girls who messaged me and then said Just kidding. Maybe she just really likes sex, I don't know, but it just feels weird. Usually girls message you and they want to chat and get to know you, but this one's just like, I want to see your big fat cock, Daddy.

It's just—

hmm, I mean, it's hot, and if I felt Sure that she's real, then I'd like it, but I just feel a bit suspicious. I feel like it's probably a catfish. And then some girls message me, but they said they're not interested in dating and they just want to talk. But she's really annoying. I say a simple sentence and she comes back at me with a whole essay, like psychological therapy kind of response, and telling me that I'm sex addicted, my dopamine receptors, something something. Oh God, I don't care. If you're not interested in me, then why'd you message me? I'm not interested in having a therapy session. I'm not gonna stop watching porn. I'm gonna watch it, okay? I don't care what it's doing to my brain. I watched porn last night. So what? I don't think it's that bad to watch porn. It's just like an enjoyment, like having a packet of crisps.

Oh, thank you.

Zero.

Very generous.

You should get with the weird freaky Facebook girl you mentioned.

She seems like a troll as well. She said she was drunk and she sent me a bunch of messages. She said, I'm a real person, I'm just an alcoholic and mostly messaged you when I was drunk. I don't think she wants to meet. Who was better girlfriend, Mira or Chihiro? Chihiro was definitely a way, way, way better girlfriend and partner. Mira was a terrible partner, let's face it. She didn't want to live together. She was just not loving or warm. She just made me feel unwanted. When can I come back on the Discord server? What's your name? Maybe if I'm in a good mood, but people come to my Discord and they start Criticizing me and they think I won't ban them. Santa Claus. No, you can't. You kept doing the N-word. Just come back with a different name so I don't know it's you, because if I let you back on, it's like I'm allowing people to spam the N-word. Mila is so not wife material. She wants to be a free spirit and meet different people and have experiences and do drugs. Why would you want that as your wife? Imagine your wife says, oh, I'm going to go to the Amazon rainforest to smoke ayahuasca.

Bye.

And if you're not happy with it, then we should break up because this is what I want to do. It's my life. No, when you're— when you're a couple, you can't think like that anymore. It's not my life, your life, it's our lives. We're together. Bloody drug addict. Drugs this and drugs that. You know who else she watched? That bloody weirdo with the green dreadlocks who was a Accused of being a pedo, because he also makes videos about drug recovery, so she's all into that. She watches the most annoying, scummiest people on YouTube. You know that weird white guy with the green dreadlocks who looks like a complete mess? Why would you watch some loser like that? He looks like an idiot. I can't stand it when people are into drugs. It's just lame. There's nothing good about drugs. I hate it. No drugs. No, no, get away from me. Worst thing in the world are people who are into drugs and acid trips. And psychedelics. I hate all that stuff so much. I hate the whole drug culture and lifestyle. It's just so degenerate. I'd rather get fucked in the anus for money than do drugs. Why do I hate drugs so much? Because everyone who is involved with drugs are bloody weirdos with face tattoos and green dreadlocks, and they're into rap music, and they've got golden teeth, and they look like weirdos. And then you've got all the Mexican cartel, all the gang stuff, people overdosing. There's just nothing good about the drug world. I don't want to have any part of it. Have you seen Breaking Bad? There's no character on Breaking Bad I want to have any association with. They're all scum. Tuco, Salamanca, that— all of Jesse Pinkman's friends just look like a bunch of degenerates. I don't want to have any people like that in my life. Bloody Mexican cartel. As if I want to be involved with the cartel, Daniel, and the drug industry.

I cried from being around you too long because I couldn't stand being away from the drugs. They loved me. You didn't love me, especially heroin, my black tar baby.

I don't actually vape.

I don't inhale it.

My ex told me that he died to never stop it. I don't like how young people glorify drugs. I don't like all these rappers like Lil Whatever XXX with all the bloody face tattoos and the golden teeth and They're like, oh, I was in jail 5 years, I'm so cool. I was a convicted criminal, now I'm making rap. Yo, bro, it's just lame. And then kids these days, they glorify that stuff and think it's cool. And they think people like bloody what's-his-face with the face tattoos— Why are, why are kids Looking up to this stuff. It's just scumbag activity. And I just associate all that with drugs and rap music and gang culture. Ugh, no thanks. I hate all that. I hate all those rap artists. I think it's just cringe. Listen to some good music like Monkey Island soundtrack. Yeah, I like the weed, but just because it made sex feel better. But I hate how people use drugs to cope with their depression or whatever. It's just depressing and sad. I don't really want to be with someone who's so broken mentally they need drugs to cope. That's not what I want in a relationship. I felt very depressed every time Mila would talk about drugs. I would just be like, oh, please Please stop it.

I was a drug addict during college but have been sober for 3 years and it's nothing to glamorize. If Mila actually glamorized that she has something mentally wrong, it takes over your life and isolates you from everyone. My mental health was It was destroyed.

Yeah, it's just sad. I know people have problems and I feel sorry for them, but I don't really want to be involved with other people's problems. I can't help them. I don't want to help them. I'm not a therapist. I don't want people coming into my lives if they're gonna— I don't want people coming into my life if they're gonna bring in a load of mental I've got enough of my own. That's why I like Chihiro. She was level-headed, she was stable, she didn't do anything like drugs or smoking or drinking excessively. That's what I need, a nice level-headed stable person. I mean, good luck to Mila and everything for trying to stop drugs and stop drinking. She was trying to stop drinking as well. She used to drink a lot when she was here. She'd have like 4 cans of beers and get drunk. But after she left, she decided to stop drinking. But she had a lot of Have I gotten into new shows lately? Not really. I'm just— I just watch Dragon's Den on YouTube, and then I watch Andy if he's streaming.

Go back to Japan, please, or pick up girls in Saudi Arabia. Can you please explain what you do from waking up to sleeping?

I just play Rainbow Six. People keep messaging me asking me what I've been doing. It's the same thing every day.

Some are worse than others, but how often did she do them? Totally not surprised that she was a druggie, LMFAO. I had no idea she was actually an addict. So were you just in love with her for her looks then?

Maybe I shouldn't talk about it. She'd be upset if I found— if she found out I was telling everyone all these intimate things she told me. She'd be pretty upset. Well, she wasn't addicted when I was with her. It was maybe a couple years ago, maybe 5, 4, 5 years ago, she had a bit of a problem. But she was really interested in drugs, like watching documentaries about drug recovery and watching YouTubers who talked about drugs. Like Russell Brand. It was just like drug, drug, drug, drug, drug, drug, drugs all the time. And then she started talking about getting some DMT from a coworker, and I was like, oh my God, not again. Aren't you done with the whole drug stuff? Why are you thinking about buying more drugs? And then she started talking about getting more tattoos, and I was like, no. Why are you doing all the things I don't want you to do? No more tattoos, no more drugs. Just stop. Can't you be normal? It's like Ice would say, it's gang shit, drugs and tattoos. Next she'll be riding a Harley-Davidson with a bloody tattoo sleeve all over her arm, like a flaming skull or something with golden teeth.

Gang shit.

Remember when Ice went to Japan? He was teaching Japanese women how to say gang shit and they didn't even know what it meant. Why would you teach them how to say that? She said she didn't like weed, but she liked the acid trip stuff, the trippy stuff. Uh, I— my whole chest just fills with depressing thoughts and emotions whenever I think— when I, when I imagine Mida's past. Just imagine the things she hasn't told me. I was scared to ask, like, Jesus, what kind of crazy life did you have? I didn't ask her about her past because I was scared that she would say something that I would really not like. Some things you don't want to know about people. Like, imagine I got a girlfriend and she says, tell me about your past, Daniel. And I say, uh, one time I tied up a girl to a tree and banged her with my mates. That's not really something you want to share. Sometimes you just want to keep stuff secret. I don't want to know things that will lower my opinion, opinion of you. Like when Chihiro told me about the Australian guy, my heart just Sunk. I felt like I lost respect straight away. The stories of the Australian guy just shocked me. So I thought Chihiro was such a nice, innocent lady. It just ruined my pers— my image of her. The Australian guy's stories were just filthy, like utter filth, and I kept asking her to tell me more details, and it was just making me feel worse, but I couldn't stop asking for more. Sometimes knowing less about a person is more Oh, thank you, Hong Kong guy.

Don't you regret being 32, living with your mom, and having no family of your own at all, nor any real job experience? And I don't like Mila, she seems scary. By the way, have your mom seen your new twer? You finger your bum and I hold your pen 15.

Tea time! I think my sexual stories are pretty innocent compared to some people. I don't know, I did sleep with some married women. Wow, that kettle is creaking.

Pretty confident that Mila has borderline personality disorder. Look it up. She split you, meaning loved you and then suddenly broke up, which is a common feature of BPD.

Can I reuse the same tea bag?

She also pulled you in and made you fall for her, which is another sign. You dodged a bullet.

Yeah, Bailey was a little bit all over the place. One minute she was really happy and bubbly, and then next minute she would start crying over some weird stuff. Like, she would burst into tears because we were together for too long in the same house. Before we went to meet her friends in Amsterdam, she burst out in tears because she was stressed out. She said she felt like there was so much pressure. I have to make sure my friends are okay, and I've got to introduce you, and then I've got to do this. So much pressure. And then she just cried. Jesus, we're just going to Amsterdam to meet your friends. Why, why are you so worried? I'm the one who's supposed to be worried. I never even met these friends before. And then she would like freak out over stuff. So we'd go, we planned to go somewhere and then she would forget her face mask, so we couldn't get the tram. We had to walk, and then she didn't top up her card, so we couldn't pay for the tram. And then she had no more money on her phone, and then she didn't have her wallet. Oh my God, it's just like every time we left the house, I had to check. You got your phone? You got your wallet? You've got your face mask? You've got your travel card? If I didn't ask her, then she would definitely forget something. And then she would freak out about it. I never met anyone so unorganized. She has terrible organization— organizing skills. I think I'm pretty good. I get everything ready and sorted. I'm pretty well prepared. I never forget things in the house. I've always got everything I need for the day. I know what I'm gonna do, I know where I'm gonna go, I know how I'm gonna get there. I've got a plan sorted and I execute the plan to 100%. There's no, oh, I forgot to top up my card, oh, I left my face mask at home. I think I'm pretty good as an organizer and a planner, apart from when it comes to my YouTube channel.

Was Mila ever abusive or angry/mean to you? What was the worst thing she did to you?

No, she was never abusive. She never got angry with me. She would get sad. Well, I don't know, actually, she was a bit Rough with me. She poked me and stuff like that, but that was like a playful thing. It's not an angry thing. Can you imagine Mila and Ice together? That would be so much chaos. I feel like Ice is similar. The reason why Ice's streams were so entertaining is because Ice was a complete mess as well. He was terrible at planning. He would break stuff and lose stuff, and he would be very clumsy, and it made the streams funny. And people thought, oh, it's scripted, but he was probably actually like that. Mira and Ice together, they would just burn down the whole house, probably. Maybe he did it on purpose for streams, but I feel like he's actually like that. He wasn't really like that when I met him. He just seemed pretty normal, apart from when he started wrestling Gary in the elevator. That was a bit weird. She slapped you on livestream. It's not really a slap. It was like this. She put her hand around my shoulder and she went like this. It's just like a tap with your— with your fingers. It's not a full-blown slap in the face. I don't know why people were exaggerating and calling it a slap. She had her arm around my shoulders and she just went like this on my cheek. Chihiro was way more aggressive, but then I upset Chihiro way more than I upset Mida. Chihiro hit me because I told people she was hitting me, and she told me to stop telling that them, I was hitting— she was hitting me. She really didn't like it when I said that. One time she jumped on top of me and she was like hammering my head. My glasses fell off. She was pretty fierce at some time. Sometimes she could be very fierce. I'm not sure how Mila would react. I never really did anything really bad to Mila. The worst I did was I just said she was a bit annoying during that stream. I can't imagine if I cheated on her and she found out. I don't know how she'd react. I never cheated on Mila, I can honestly say. I never felt like I wanted to. I didn't have any interest in other girls when I was with her. So I guess I do have the ability to not cheat. Where are my medals? I want my brownie points. How I became— how I overcame my cheating problem. And then I should talk about how great I am for not cheating. People think I cheated on all my exes when I didn't. I never cheated on the French girlfriend. I never cheated on chlamydia girlfriend. I kind of cheated on the first Japanese girlfriend, but then she ghosted me anyway. I never cheated Well, actually, I did cheat on the Korean one, but we weren't really girlfriend and boyfriend. It was more like a casual meetup thing. Well, maybe it was more to her, I don't know. But Meida said she didn't like ice. I used to watch some ice streams in front of Meida. And then Maida said he has really bad energy and she doesn't like him and he seems really negative. And I got upset because I don't, don't like how she was badmouthing Ice because I like Ice a lot. And then she was just slagging him off and she doesn't even know him or his story. I only cheated on Chihiro a few times. A couple times before we were married, I had a few Tinder hookups, and then there was the Hong Kong woman, and then there was Pia, and then there might have been— there was that Japanese woman as well that I filmed. Mida's right about Ice. Yeah, I guess so. She's not wrong. Ice does have a bit of a negative energy. That's probably why he has such a toxic community. Why do I like Ice? Number one, I really, really liked his livestreaming personality that he used to have. I thought it was really entertaining. I also relate with him on a few things, like feeling lonely, Not talking to your family, treating your audience like they're your friends because you don't actually have friends and you feel alone. I'm not sure. Oh, thank you.

Have you ever had any partners who were really good at cereal compared to the rest?

Yeah, the chlamydia girlfriend was really good.

Also, was the Japanese guy still the best BJ you've ever had?

No, I'd actually say Mida. I think Mida was the best BJ. But only because I showed her how to do it how I like it. In the beginning she was not good, but I trained her to do it in the way I like it. Nearing the end, during the last few weeks or few months, I always got her to give me a BJ before we started because I liked it so much. Usually I don't really bother getting a BJ But she would do it just how I liked it. Chlamydia girlfriend, still better sex. Chlamydia girlfriend also gave me good BJs. I didn't have to train her how to do it. She just knew how to do it in the way I liked it. Yeah, chlamydia girlfriend was great because I was also younger. I was about 24. So I was really, really horny. Way hornier than I was when I was 30 or 28. I was so horny when I was 24, 22, and having chlamydia girlfriend was just amazing for my horniness at the time. Plus, I found her amazingly attractive. I, I think one of the main reasons I liked Ice so much was because, um, I really looked up to him. As someone who's— because I'm very scared of strangers and interacting with people, and seeing how good he was at interacting with strangers and how entertaining he made it, I think I respected him a lot for that, and I kind of aspired to be like that myself, but I never could. His— the way he interacted with strangers was just so fun. And funny and natural. It's one of the reasons why I also like people like Harold and Andy, because they're just good at talking to people, and that's something I've always struggled with. So I enjoy seeing people doing it, doing something I'm bad at. That I wish I could be good at. I wish I could talk to strangers and make them laugh and not come across as like this awkward weirdo. Why aren't you with Miss Chlamydia? We nearly got married. We, we got the documents signed, and I was supposed to go to Osaka to go to the embassy to get the special form. But we kept having arguments. Number one, my wisdom tooth was coming out and I was in a lot of pain. So as you can imagine, I was very grumpy and snappy, and I probably upset her. I made her cry a few times because I was so snappy. And then the chlamydia thing was a massive problem. I was in so much pain from the chlamydia, you would not believe it. And then she was also in pain. She would wake up in the middle of the night and just start screaming like, oh, it was scary. She had to go to the hospital and get like a vagina scan, and then they found out what she had. And then I had to get tested. It was a nightmare. We didn't know what it was at first. I just ignored it because in the beginning I just had like a weird feeling when I peed. I didn't really think it was serious. And then my joints— my first, my elbow, my knees started to swell up, and then my hip joints got inflamed. I couldn't even walk sometimes. I had to crawl along the floor. And then finally, maybe a couple weeks later, we decided to get tested. We went to a sex clinic in Betpu, which is where Dogen lives. Not doxxing, that's public information. And then we got blood tested, blood tested, urine tested. They told us we had chlamydia and we needed to be on antibiotics. And it was just a nightmare. It took, it took weeks for the symptoms to clear. And then even months afterwards, I still have— actually, even years later, I still have the joint pains. I had the joint pains recently. I still get the joint pains, by the way. It doesn't happen as often, but sometimes, maybe once every few weeks, it happens. I get like an aching, dull aching pain in my hip joint. So I was in so much pain and I was in a bad mood and I was grumpy, and then she cried a lot because I wasn't very nice, and we kept having arguments. She kicked me out twice, and I, I felt so fed up with it. I had enough. So I went to Korea and I ghosted her. She sent me a big long Email, and I just ignored her. I went back to Korea, and I went back with my Korean girlfriend, and I just forgot about the chlamydia girlfriend. It was such a nightmare. Maybe if the chlamydia didn't happen and my wisdom tooth didn't happen, maybe we would have gotten married, but she was also kind of mental. She was also a divorcee, actually. She got married before, but she got divorced after a few weeks. She had a lot of sadness. I met her in Tokyo, in a Tokyo guesthouse. She's from Oita, which is south Japan, so she moved to Tokyo when she was about 29. That's when I met her, but we didn't get together until she was 33 or 32, a few years later. I don't know where she is now. She had a Lang8 profile that I found. Her last journal entry was something like, I ran away from home. I'm living in a net cafe. I don't know what to do with my life. She sounded suicidal. I wonder if she's okay. I tried messaging her, but she blocked me straight away. This was in 2016. I keep— I've actually bookmarked her profile and I do check it. Now and then. Let me check it now. Yeah, I've still got her profile. She's alive! It says last login within 3 days, but her last entrance was 2017. I'll read you her last diary. It wants me to log in to read it. Wow, she logged in within the last 3 days. Here it says, I think I was tired. Have you ever felt to want to reset your life? I wanted it, but I didn't have the brave I thought if I get a chance to change me in a good way, I'll think about it. I looked for the answer why I need to live. I didn't know both why I need to live and die, so I stopped thinking and followed to drift for a while. And then This one says, some kind friends sent me messages and worried about me. I'm okay. I'll try to write again. There were many things happened around me in a few months. The end of April, my thought was terrible bad. I was down. I left from my parents' house to become a homeless. I had lived at the internet cafe for a few days. At first, I enjoyed reading manga. I haven't read many manga. In the past. That was July 2017, so that was 3 years after we split up. I don't know what she's doing now. She must be like 42. If 7 years ago she was 33, then yeah, she must be about 40. She must be the same age as Chihiro, actually. It was so weird how I found her. I use that website Lang-8. I used to use it to practice Japanese, and I was— I found some guy's diary, and in the comment section I saw her picture, and I clicked on it, and it was her. I can't believe she used the same website and I found her just like that. Yeah, people read the journal. And they correct her English, and then in exchange they get points. And then you can also read their journals and correct the Japanese or the English. Last login within 3 days.

Huh.

Oh, it says her age here, 39. I wonder what she looks like now. She was pretty hot when she was 29, 30. How's her personality versus Chihiro? She was so unstable. She was also a bit weird. She had like a weird English fetish. She wanted me to speak in English during sex because it turned her on. She worked in a bakery. She was baking bread. But she seemed a bit lost, like she didn't really know what she was doing in life. She didn't have a plan. A bit directionless, a bit like me. But she was very emotional. I kept making her cry very easily. I remember one time I made her cry. She hugged me and my whole face was swollen from the wisdom tooth, and she accidentally squeezed my swollen face. And it was so painful, and I just kind of snapped at her. I was like, stop pressing my face, I told you it's painful. I probably sounded really mean. And then she cried, and I was like, oh, don't cry again. I was just in such a bad mood the whole time. This stupid wisdom tooth was so painful. I was in pain for 2 weeks. I couldn't open my mouth. My whole face was swollen. The pain was unbelievable. I couldn't move my mouth. I couldn't chew. I couldn't eat food. I had to suck soup up using a straw like a fly. Yeah, I was pretty I wish I was kinder, but I just, I couldn't stop myself because I was so miserable from the pain. Why didn't I go to the dentist? Because I was in Japan. I didn't know how to do the dentist, and then I, I was scared it would be really expensive because I didn't have insurance. And then what were they gonna do? Pull the tooth out? Give me painkillers? I didn't want to be addicted to painkillers. So I saw, I saw that show called House where that guy is addicted to Vicodin or something, and that scared me off painkillers. I think I did take some in the end because the pain was just unbearable. But that probably ruined the relationship. Such bad timing. I tried chewing on a tea bag. And I tried using cold drinks to press against it to numb it. Nothing really helps a lot. It was just torture. You just doxxed her. I found her Lang8 profile. I don't really care. I didn't dox her. I didn't say her name or anything. I don't know how you'd find her. I was kind of upset she blocked me after I tried reaching out. I can't believe she blocked me. I messaged her in 2017, nearly 4 years later, just to say hi. Why would she block me? It's not like we ended on bad terms. But that's what most Japanese women are like. They'll just block you after you break up. Yeah, nearly every one of my Japanese exes blocked me afterwards. Sayaka, Sayuri, chlamydia girlfriend, all blocked me. Tomoko blocked me. Single mother didn't block me, but we just stopped talking. I blocked Tamira. Yeah, but then I unblocked her. I blocked Turkish girl cuz she was annoying. Turkish girl was such a bitch going onto my subreddit and then Writing all that shit about me. Daniel did this, Daniel did that. Daniel made me bleed and cry because he's so bad at sex. Boo-hoo. Making it sound like I raped her or something. What kind of music have I been listening to? I listened to Monkey Island 3 soundtrack. It's pretty good. I recorded some of it in case someone asked me. Would you like to listen?

Okay.

Oh, this bit's so good.

So good.

And this bit— no, not that bit. This bit— no, not this bit. No, don't like that one. This one's the best bit. I love this piratey sounding music. It just makes you feel like you're on one of those wooden warships. You're in the captain's cabin, you're sitting there, you've got the waves rocking, you're slowly sailing towards some magical island, and you're on this big ship. The colonial era, very romantic. I'll try and find the full version. Let me find it quickly. Oh, I thought I downloaded it. I did download it. Where's it gone? Ah, I did. Here it is. I can't find it. Oh, whatever, who cares? There's too many songs and there's too many hours to find it. But I like that music. I like soundtracks from video games I used to play when I was a kid. I find it soothing. No, I don't remember the name of it. Doesn't my back hurt? Yeah, it does hurt. I might move to my chair, but I'm enjoying the fireplace. Huh, I'm surprised she logged in recently. Last login within 3 days. That means she's logging in, but she hasn't written anything. Have I listened to any new artists? No, I don't really listen to proper music. I like Monkey Eyed and—

what?

She made a new entry! Oh my God, I thought it said no new entries. She made a new entry, guys. Chlamydia Girlfriend. It says, um, April 3rd, 2021. Wait, I never saw this one. This one, July 28th, 2017. How come I didn't see this one before? It says, I found a Catholic church near an internet cafe. I went to Catholic kindergarten. I remember the kindergarten days and I missed the good memories. I tried to pray but I didn't remember. My grandfather and grandmother were Buddhist. I guess my parents are Buddhist too. I felt peaceful being at church. I talked to the God at night for 3 days about 30 years ago. I prayed at church last time. That was 2017, but I don't remember seeing that. How come it's suddenly there? Maybe she said it's a private— oh, this is the new one! Oh, I'm so excited! 2021! Am I translating it? No, she's written it in English. This is her English blog. Wow, this is the first time I've heard from her in 4 years. Yeah, I met her in 2014. I'm so excited. Okay, let's read it. Happy Easter! It has been a long time since I contacted you here. How have you been? I stopped studying English because I was busy, so my English skill is more poor. I wanted to write you a couple times, but I couldn't. It needed a lot of times. I'll go to Easter Mass on Sunday morning. Wow, she's religious now. What? 2017 said she went to church. 4 years later, she's going to Mass on Sunday. I'll try cooking for dinner. Salad, rabbit, imaged, and cabbage roll.

What?

I think I put eggs into the meatball inside cabbage leaves. It seems tasty. What will you do tomorrow? I hope you have a good day. Wow, she became religious. Well, I guess it's nice to know she didn't kill herself. That was April. Beginning of April. That's so nice. Maybe I should make a fake account and talk to her. She won't know it's me. I wonder if I got any messages. I haven't checked this website in ages. Inbox. I got a friend request 2017. No, I don't have anything. You weren't lying when you said most your girlfriends have problems. I have never had a single girlfriend who didn't have some kind of mental illness. They're all crazy. Interesting. I wonder when her next post will be. Stalking my ex-girlfriend. She's 39 now. She's getting to MILF territory. Happy Easter to you too, my babe. I wonder if I'd still be insanely attracted to her now. The smell of ass video was created because of her. The smell of ass video. I was talking about her ass in the video. It smelt so fragrant and pungent. Every time I thrusted forwards, it wafted up into my nostrils. That was back when I was so poetic. I used to be so poetic when it came to videos. I would craft the monologue. The monologues to my videos were like crafted poetry. With every hip thrust, the fragrance wafted up into my nostrils and sent me into a dizzying something of some— I got really lazy when it came to videos. I put— I used to put a lot of effort into Into the monologues. Now I'm just like, hey guys, welcome back to a new video. Today I'm talking about blah blah blah. Let me find it. Smell. Love the smell of ass. Someone reuploaded it.

Hey, so sometimes I get asked this question, hey, hey Daniel, do you have any strange sexual fetishes like feet fetishes or belly button fetishes? And usually I say no, I don't have any weird fetishes apart from the obvious Asian girl fetish. But now that I think about it, I do have this weird thing with smells where I really enjoy the smell of a human body. And I first realized this back in 2014 when I was having sex sex with my girlfriend, the Japanese girl that I nearly married, and I noticed that she had this really strong smell of ass, and I really liked it. I found it really enjoyable and arousing.

In what kind of sense?

It kind of smelled like this rich odor of body sweat combined with the smell of shit, basically. I know it sounds disgusting, but it smelled really nice to me. I really liked the smell. Is that weird, or is that normal?

My videos were pretty funny. I have to give myself credit. They were unintentionally funny. I sound so stupid.

Shouldn't be nice. It shouldn't be pleasant. It should disgust and repulse people because shit isn't nice. It's disgusting and full of bacteria. You don't want to get anywhere near that stuff. But for some reason, I really liked and enjoyed the smell of shit when it was coming from her. It was really noticeable every time we had sex doggy style, and every time I thrusted forwards, the smell would waft upwards into my nostrils, and it was really arousing. I really enjoyed the smell. I don't know why she had such a strong smell of ass, because usually girls don't have that much of a strong smell because they wash properly down there after they've taken a shit. So—

I don't know why it's so funny. I mean, everything is true. I did like the smell. But the way I'm explaining it just sounds so weird and funny. And there's, there's no hatefulness in the way I came across back then. Now I just seem so angry, like, why aren't you fucking watching my videos, you stupid idiot? I'm so angry now. I don't know how to get back to this version of Daniel.

I'm not sure if she wasn't washing properly after she took a shit, but I wasn't complaining because like I said, I really enjoyed the smell and it was the first time I experienced smelling this aroma whilst having sex and it was really nice. And since that relationship, I always check to see if the girl has this same smell, but none of them do because They usually wash.

Ah, I miss that Daniel too. I really hate how angry I've gotten. It sucks. How do I get back to being like that? You compare that to my new video where I just— I look like I hate you guys so much, or I'm faking it. Try my best not to look angry. Look at this, my new video.

Hi, so I've gathered you all here today on my YouTube channel to excitedly announce that I managed to get myself a job recently. As you may have noticed, my YouTube channel has not been doing amazingly well well. And in order to get back to Japan when it eventually reopens, I'm going to need a bit more money. And the best way to get money is by getting a job. And I managed to finally get one last week after applying to several places. I went for a few interviews and I found this really good job which is nearby to where I live. I won't mention where it is or what company it's at because there's a lot of weird people on the internet that would love Do you think there's really a big difference, or is it all in my hind— my mind?

I don't know.

I still have like that serious, non-expressive way of talking. Now, can you see my anger that visibly on my face?

And they would love to try and cause me troubles and problems and try and get me fired. I'll just say that it's in the retail industry, and you might be thinking, the retail industry?

That doesn't sound like a good match for you, Daniel, because you don't really like dealing with people. I don't think I seem that bitter in this video. I don't look that angry, but this one's completely fake. It's like rehearsed and acted. Compare that to this.

wash that area until there's no smell left, which I find to be really disappointing. It's really boring when the girl smells like nothing. Smell is a big part of sex for me, and if the girl smells like nothing, she has no body odor, it's kind of boring. It feels like you're not having sex with a proper human being because human beings have smells. They smell like sweat and body oil. I don't like having sex with girls after they've had a shower because they've washed away all that delicious odor and smell. Pre-shower sex is just so much better than post-shower sex.

But I wouldn't even make a video like this now because it wouldn't make any money. It'd get demonetized straight away if I was just like, I like sex with my penis in the bumhole. I'm trying to make money. Back then I didn't care because I didn't have many viewers, so I just made whatever I wanted. So I wouldn't even make that kind of video again anyway, so I don't know. That's the problem. I can't make what I wanted to make because you'll get demonetized.

Do you remember that Iranian girl that I met last year in Japan? The one that I asked if she wanted to have sex with me and she said no? Well, one of the main reasons why I felt so attracted to her wasn't because I thought she was pretty or cute.

I want to have sex with your mom. It was like all my videos back then was just sex, sex, sex, sex. Uh, one time I met a girl and I wanted to have sex with her, but she wouldn't want to have sex with me. So I went to bed and I dreamed about having sex with her, and then next day we had sex. It was like nonstop sex talk, and I sound so dumb talking about it.

It was because she had this amazing smell of armpits. Every time she sat next to me in my room, I could smell this strong, rich, bitter smell of armpit, and it was really arousing. There was this one night when she was in my room and she leaned over me and her armpit was right in front of my face, and I just took in this really deep—

Why am I describing this girl's armpit in great, great detail. And then now I'm like this.

When I'm not really producing world-class A-quality content like I used to try to, and now I'm just— I guess I've gotten a little bit lazy, so I can't really blame them getting fed up and losing interest in my stuff. So thanks so much to the people who are still here and they still watch and they're still interested and they're still supportive of my channel and they still come in to watch the live streams.

Yeah, it's pretty boring now, isn't it? I look really bored telling— talking about that topic. Acknowledge the gifted subs, you butthole. Oh, oh no, I didn't see that. Why isn't it telling me when I get a gifted sub? I'm so sorry. Thank you.

A Keemstar? What?

And underscore donated one dollar. I don't know what's wrong with my alert system.

Acknowledge the gifted sub, you butthole.

Ah, ma ma ma ma ma. That's what I miss. I miss back. In those days when I had something I really wanted to talk about and I, I was interested in it and that's why I wanted to talk about it. Thanks for the gifted subs. I've got— wow, I've got 55 subs now.

So generous.

The problem is you can't really make money by talking about sex. If I kept saying the word sex and penis all the time, I'd probably only make $5. I don't think I talked about everything sex-related anyway. During streams I talk about sex a lot, don't I? And the best sex I ever had. Oops, I missed a donation. XX donated 18 minutes ago. Thank you.

Okay, no offense, but you definitely need a better taste in music. Those songs suck.

They don't suck, they're good.

By the way, do you listen to non-video game music anymore?

Well, it takes—

I think I remember you like Vampire Weekend and Bullet for My Valentine.

No, I don't listen to bands anymore. I listen to video game music and ASMR coffee shop jazz. I don't know why I don't like bands anymore. What else do I like?

Who likes this?

I like this. This guy, he's like the musical version of me. He loves eye dabs.

Check that butthole out. Check that sweet little butthole, girl. Damn, I like that hole in your butt. Take it out, I want to take a good look. Oh, nice job on your butthole.

No, I don't listen to him. But his music reminds me of the weird sex videos I used to make, but in music form. He's called Mark Ribollet or something like that. It's not really my kind of music, but he's good and it's funny. I like this guy, he plays a trumpet. It's Monkey Island.

We're a band of vicious pirates a-sailing out to sea. When you hear our gentle singing, be sure to turn and flee.

Oh, this is just ridiculous.

This is good music.

Come on, men, we've got to recover that map. That pirate will be done for when he falls into our trap. We're a club of tune-for-rovers.

We can sing in every clef.

We can even hit the high notes. It's just too bad we're tone deaf.

A pirate I was meant to be. And Roan the Sea. Monkey Island. Do you like my singing? Did I learn this on piano? No, but I did learn this one and I can play it pretty well. Let me find it. Uh, I learned this one.

Monkey Island.

Maybe I'll play it next time. Actually, do you want to go down and play it now? My mum's in bed, she's sleeping, so she's got her hearing aids out. I'll play it now if you want. Why not? Have a piano sesh. Fuck it, dude. As Ice would say. I am in the mood, actually. I'm feeling good right now. Play some piano for my Twitch viewers. My sister is in London. I hope my mum's sleeping.

Oh fuck, she's not sleeping.

I don't think she's sleeping. Mum, are you sleeping?

Mum?

I don't think she can hear me. Turn off my fire. Mum, you stupid bitch! No, I wouldn't say that. That asshole should be sleeping by now. Hopefully the internet's good down here. Let me check. Oh, it's cold in here. Oh my God! Oh my God! Is it streaming?

Testing.

Is it streaming? Yes, it is. This is a pro piano.

Is it too loud? Is it too loud?

Okay. Did you like it? I messed up the end. Let me try the end again.

Shh!

You're waking up my mum. Oh, thank you very much.

Good job. I changed my donation to 4.2 times the usual amount because that was very, very entertaining. You should do stuff like this more often.

Wow, how kind. But that's the only song I know how to play, and it gets a bit annoying. I keep playing the same song over and over. I used to know more. I used to be able to play Lord of the Rings, but I forgot. Where can I put this?

I forgot.

I used to be able to play it really well. Yeah, I forgot. Ah, so annoying. I hate it when you spend all this time learning how to play it, and then you don't practice for a few months, and then you forget it completely. I used to be able to play the Shire song flawlessly, and then I used to be able to play some other Monkey Island songs, but I forgot. I should try learning it again. It's just, it takes so much effort.

No cap, I will donate $50 if you do a stream in the future learning or relearning a piano song. Oh, thank you. I had no idea you were any good at piano.

Hmm.

Not gonna lie, I thought you were gonna play that first song with 2 fingers. Wonderful.

Thanks.

The problem is I can't just play by ear. I have to watch a YouTube video that shows you how to play it, and then it will take me weeks of memorization and practice to be able to play it well enough so it sounds good. But if I don't keep practicing, I forget. My sister, she can read. Look, she reads these books. She can read sheet music. I have no idea how to read this. So she can just read this and play without having to memorize stuff because she can read the notes. I wish I could still remember some of the other ones I could play.

Let me try again.

But it gets boring, the same one.

That's all.

If there's a new song that I want to learn, I'd learn it. But there's nothing really that catches my ear recently. I used to be really into it. A couple years ago. Oh, thank you, Anonymous. I can nearly remember The Lord of the Rings. I can feel like it's in my memory, but I just I can't get it out.

Not again.

You want to hear the same song over and over again? I can do that. My sister's music room. She's got guitar and a bongo. My sister's much better at music. She can play guitar and Is it Mrs.

Maple?

Mrs.

Maple?

Meow, meow.

Mama, I can see you. She's sleeping.

Mrs. Mimo sleeping on the sofa, gonna wake you up in the nighttime. How annoying is this? Someone wakes you up and shines a light right in your face. It's not in the face; it's above. Okay, go to sleep. Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da. Well, this is the bedroom. I had sex with Mila and Chihiro and Pia and Korean girlfriend. Not at the same time. You know, I mainly decided to learn the piano to impress girls. That was like the only reason. The first time I was interested in playing piano, because we always had a piano, my granddad had it in the house since forever, and I found out you can learn piano songs pretty easily if you type in the name of the song and then Synthesia at the end, and then it comes up with a bunch of videos that shows you exactly which keys to press. So I just Watch those, and I copied it key for key until I could memorize the song. And I learned Lord of the Rings, a couple One Piece songs as well. There was this One Piece tune I really liked, 2013, I think. I learned these so I could play them at the guest house because the guest house had a piano, had a keyboard. Let me find it. And I played these songs in the guest house on the keyboard and no one cared. No girls came up to me and were like, wow, Daniel, you're so cool. I felt like it was a massive waste of time. I wonder what the song was called. Oh, it's this one. This is the one I could play. I could play this really well back then. I might learn this again, actually. It's not too complicated when you see the pattern.