going for Yakiniku dinner

Can't believe you're broke now. Smiling

face with tears.

Oh, thanks, T-Pop.

Yakiniku money.

Do you like my thumbnail?

The thumbnail looks so good. The little

girl in the corner. I love this

app for making thumbnails.

Okay, I think we're set,

set and ready.

Who's that girl? My future girlfriend.

Okay.

Ready to go for yakiniku.

Meeting up with Chihiro,

going to discuss remarriage.

Yeah guys, I'm in Japan again.

Hair's looking good.

Damn, the sunburn really has aged me.

Somehow it's made my skin look dry.

I need to get moisturizer.

Well, I'm sure some fried meat and beer

will fix it. There's a man walking up and

down outside the corridor, pissing me off.

My lips got sunburnt as well. They're kind

of cracked around the edges. What else do

I need? Should I bring my creams? It's

kind of afternoon now, so I don't really

need to worry about the sun.

Ah, I always feel so nervous leaving.

About, um, worried about forgetting

something.

Had a good rest today. My bum doesn't hurt

so much. I think tomorrow I'll be feeling

even better. But tomorrow

we need to pack and stuff.

Moving back in with Jahira.

Oh, my thigh muscles. Oh, my thighs.

Thighs are dead.

Show your outdoor setup in the mirror.

Okay, it's just a

phone on my bag strap.

It's just a phone.

Guys, are you ready yet? Oh my God,

you're so slow. Sounds like

my mum. My mum whining about my dad being

slow. My dad always used to be so slow

getting ready. He would shut all the

curtains and the windows, turn off all the

plugs, going up and down. My mum would be

waiting,

saying, oh my God, you're so slow.

Dilly-dally,

dilly-dally. Okay, I've got my money,

I've got my wallet, got my bike key.

That man is walking up and down outside.

You look so tall. I'm just 5'9.

Is that your girlfriend in the thumbnail?

I wish. Yeah, it's my date. We're gonna

meet her now. She's waiting

at the yakiniku restaurant.

I want to make sure I don't go out when

that man comes.

Oh my, I heard something shot.

I'm hiding in my room.

Okay, go, go, go,

go, go. Don't talk to me.

Go, go,

go.

Go, go,

go.

Go, go, go.

I didn't put the eSIM on.

あ の 食べ に 行 きます。 焼 肉？

あ、 焼 肉？ 食べ に 行 きます。

はい はい。 Got

ambushed by old lady.

Ambushed.

Yakiniku. I think she's deaf. She couldn't

hear me. I was trying to set up my phone.

Google Maps.

9 minutes.

My Japanese mom.

Okay, I think everything's working. Let's

go.

I should have asked her to come with me.

Would you like to join me?

Oh, my knees still hurt.

Maybe I should have put sun cream on.

Actually, too late now.

I think I left it in the house.

Oh, my knees, knees are still painful.

Yesterday's ride killed me.

Take a bus on with you.

Wrong way, go back.

Oh, nice Toyota C-HR,

my favorite. That would be my

car of choice. If I was going to buy one.

Hybrid, hybrid car.

And left.

Oh, I missed the turn in here.

It tells me to turn into the weirdest

roads. Ah, I cannot ride up this.

Oh, no thanks, this is too

steep. Look at this.

Oh, my trousers keep falling down.

Where is

yakiniku?

Where's my money? Oh, it's in

my pocket. Oh, fuck, there's one there.

Oh, where'd I put it?

Okay.

Straight ahead, 6 minutes.

I don't know why I feel so nervous.

I might put the camera in my pocket. When

Uh, I don't think they would say anything

about filming. It's just a restaurant.

I can't see a damn thing, it's so bright.

Oh my God.

Check my map.

You forgot to bring your mask? I didn't

think I'd need it because it's kind of

Oh,

so sunny. Where are the damn clouds?

I'm gonna get sunburnt again.

See, if I was black, I wouldn't have this

problem. Stupid white skin.

White— half white, half Asian skin.

Everyone here looks kind of orange.

Turn right,

then left.

Wait, where's left? There's no left.

Is that a left? Is that someone's house?

And then right.

Ah, uh-oh.

Oh, oh.

Straight down here.

Uh, where is it?

Oh, there is.

Yakiniku. I'm just trying to pike my bark.

Bark my pike? Park my bike.

Look, little parking slots for the

bikes. That's cute. That's adorable.

Wow, that was quick.

Hope it's

empty. Why is my

trousers so heavy?

I feel like my trousers are falling down

or my dick is flopping out the underwear

hole. This feels strangely breezy.

Okay, now I need to psych myself

up to go inside. I'll pretend

to look at the menu for like 10 minutes.

Uh,

waiting for my date. Oh no,

I've been stood up.

What? Lunch, 11 to 4 PM?

It's 4 PM now.

Well, what happens after 4 PM?

It definitely said on Google they're open

until midnight.

The menu changes.

I'm scared.

I feel like they're going to explain stuff

to me and I won't understand it. What's

this? So ¥3,000.

I thought it was ¥2,000.

Okay, I'll go in.

It says eleven,

eleven to twelve. Cool.

There's people in here. Why are they in

here?

食べ たい。 食べ や んと いた い。 いい

よ。 車 でも

雨 喋 った こと ある や ろ。 それ どう す し な かった から いい

や ろ。 残 り 三 分。 行 っちゃ う？ 帰

った から。 なんか 電 波 残 り に して ね。 み んな で いい よ。

安全 に 安全。 あ 持 って ない。 いや、

だ い ぶ 三 十 五 走 った

で しょ。 まあ 分 かった 方 が いい。 絶 対 そう。 や っぱ

り そう。 はい。 腰 だけ 足 だけ。 はい。

六 千 六 百 六 十 度。 はい。 ありがとうございます。 うん。

分 かった。 ス ーパ ー。 お

い。

す い ません、

失 礼 いた しました。 先生 様 ですね、 ア ル コ ール 持 って いただ き

お 願 いい た します。 はい。 ア ル コ ール して いただ いて も いい

ですか？ あ、 大丈夫 です。 しました か ア ル コ ール？ あ、 ど こ

に？ あ。 あ、 手 手 に はい あ 大丈夫 です。

七 番 テ ーブ ル お 客 様 お 願 いい た します。 い

ら っ しゃ い ませ。 ありがとうございます。

こ ちら

の 食べ 放 題 メ ニ ュ ー と は 何 でしょう か。 英 語

の メ ニ ュ ー ない です。 英 語 の メ ニ ュ ー は

ない です。 タ ッ チ パ ネル では 切 り 替 わ ります。 英 語

用 に。 Where

did he go?

そうだね。

お 願い

します。

食べ 放 題、 食べ 放 題 の お 手 軽 コ ー ス です。 ね

はい

はい これ 飲 み 物 つ いて ます か 飲 み 物 つ いて ない

です 別 料 金 ですね ド リ ン ク ソ フ ト ド リ ン

ク ア ル コ ール 飲 ま れ ます か 生 ビ ール 飲 みたい

です 飲 み 放 題 単 品 あ 単 品 単 品 で はい

以上 で 大丈夫 ですか

はい はい 十 時。 ガ ッ ツ パ ネル で、

こ っち なんだ よね。 イ ング リ ッ シ ュ。 はい。

これで オ ッ ケ ー。

はい。 What

should

I get?

Why do I feel anxiety watching Lolwizzy

face?

No, come back!

Oh no, I broke it.

Why is it not working?

What do you want?

Beef? I want,

uh, cow beef. I want

garlic.

Pork.

And, uh, why is everything garlic?

This is spicy cow bean.

Beef rib. Everything's garlic.

What's harami?

What should I get? Kimchi?

Q-cup kimchi.

Beer.

French fry.

Harami is skirt steak. I don't even know

what that means. My fire's

burning.

Oh, tender skirt meat.

What's a skirt? I'll get 2 of them.

And, uh, what else? Lettuce leaves.

Okay, give me miso.

I don't choose.

Should I get rice or chips?

I'll just get this first.

Processed. I'll teach you how to do

yakiniku.

Get everything.

Nama beer.

I don't know what beer is. They just call

it nama beeru.

Oh, thanks Jenkins. Why do I feel anxiety?

I've never done this before alone.

What else do they have?

Chicken. Why is this ramen chicken?

Oh, they got sausage.

What do you recommend for bodybuilding?

More carbs or just meat? Should I

fill up on meat?

I can

turn the heat down.

Might put it

down to medium.

Wait, I'm pretty sure I ordered. It says

items ordered.

My cucumber.

Oh,

metal chopsticks.

Take a picture

for my girlfriend.

Okay, let's get cooking.

Cooking. Well, what are these tiny bits?

Looking good.

Niku, you cook piece by

piece? That'll take ages. Chuck it all on.

I don't need scissors, it's already

chopped up. Oh, look at the fire.

Beautiful. Wow, I'm in yakiniku alone.

Never thought I'd do this.

The music's

so funny, it's like Sims music.

Oh, I better flip it over. I think it's

burning. Oh my God,

fuck! What? How's it burning already?

Quick, quick, quick! Oh my God,

don't put it in the middle. It's gonna

burn in the middle. Oh no,

this one's burnt. Look at that, ruined it.

Oh, this one's stuck to the grill. Oh, it

dropped down into the grill.

It's crazy they just let the customers

cook their own food. What if I burn it and

the fire alarm goes off or something?

I'm nervous.

I can use

my right hand better.

It's so burning.

Oh my God, this one's not even cooking.

Oh, this one's done.

I don't know if this is done. It looks so

red. What is that?

How many minutes do I have to eat, by the

way? It's usually 9 20 minutes.

This is

gonna be ¥3,500.

Yeah, 30 a lot. Oh, this one's done.

Well, that one's done.

Oh my God, oh my God.

Is it supposed to be doing that?

This one's done. This one's done.

This one's done. Done.

Done and done. Oh,

that's hard work.

Smelling good.

Yeah, I'm taking you guys on a romantic

dinner. This is what it's like being on a

date with me. Gonna mess up your food.

Come on.

Oh my God.

Oh my gosh, it's going out of control.

Oh,

is this chicken?

I think— oh look, barbecued chicken.

Christ. Okay,

here's your meat.

You taking us to a lovely palace

with a nanny grin, Jason?

Daddy, eat my cut. Eat my cut. Eat my cut.

Where's

the miso soup?

You're about to receive a message from

Megaboreas. Yell me safe.

そ して

ここ に バ ル ブ の ケ イ ジャ ンダ レ で ございます。 バ

ジ ル 枝 豆 と ア ク サ イ キ ム チ で ございます。 こちら

で。 中で炒めでございます。

Let's give the little table Daniel after

love hotel.

They can get baby chickens. I love

it when their little heads pop

in and out.

You is kind of still a daddy boy.

You'll get some tender eggs when dropping

it.

失礼いたします。こちらブタカル。 と

豚 カ ル ビ と、 こちら 豚 ハ ム と

お 待 ち を して お ります。 こちら お 先 します。 お

願 いい た します。 I'm

so full up.

Also,

fuck.

それではテーブル2名様をお願いします。 This

music's so annoying.

Can't they play soothing music? This jazz

is so chaotic sounding.

Oh, my cucumber.

Oh,

I think I'm done.

I'm so full up.

I think I ate quite a lot.

I'll try and finish the rest.

I don't think they sell ice cream. I don't

see it on the menu.

And I ran out of beer.

I don't think they have ice cream.

Less kids under the table throwing kisses.

一番丁寧にお客様をお願いします。

Let's

go. It says 10 minutes left.

小 学 生 様 とか ね、 あ もし お ら れ ました と

した ら、 え っと 小 学 生 様 だけ の お 席 で なく て

大 人 様 も あの 一 緒 に や ら せて いただ ける よう な

こと にな ります ので、 ちょっと だけ お願い して ありがとうございます。

はい っていう の が あの 実 際 に こちら も

こちら では 間 違 い ない んです が、 はい 若 い 系 三 千

四 百 九 十 八 円 で ございます。 こちら の ポ イ ント カ ード

あ、ないです。

Oh my God, why are there kids everywhere?

There's school kids everywhere.

Why that gets everywhere?

Where's my sweet? I took 2 sweets.

Oops,

chubby Japanese kids hanging around

yakiniku. And knock someone's

bike over.

What if I knocked one of their bikes over?

They'd beat me up. Beaten up by a

15-year-old Japanese boy.

Oh my God,

oh my God. I hope I don't get hungry again

tonight because that was kind of expensive

for one meal.

I don't think those girls were very old

though. They're probably like 16.

That's why I had to hold back, hold back

the testosterone-charged charisma.

Otherwise I would have smashed all of

them, obviously.

In the car park one by one,

line them up over the bicycles.

Hey, how do I get home?

Should we go home or somewhere else? I

don't know, still kind of early.

Go to river or park.

Okay.

There's a big park here.

Uh.

Oh, my legs.

I'm not sure if I ate a lot or not much.

I ordered, I think, 4 servings of meat.

Seems like a lot.

It was okay. I guess.

I think after the first serving, I kind

of lost interest in eating.

It's weird because at first it tastes

really good, and I start getting full up,

and then I'm not really that bothered

I just left the yakiniku,

spent 2 hours there, or half— 1 hour and a

half. ¥3,500.

How much is that in dollars? Like $30?

Probably won't

do that again.

I'm not sure if I got my money's worth.

I thought it was ¥2,000. Oh shit, it's

like chappy high school kids up ahead. I

thought it was ¥2,000, but I think that's

for lunchtime before 4:00 PM.

So after 4:00 PM, I think they raise the

prices. I hate school

kids. Going to

speed up past them. I think they're with

their mom.

Yeah, it's their mom. They won't misbehave

if they're with their mom. It's usually

the gangs of boys that scare me.

I don't know if gangs of Japanese boys are

any better than English boys. Gangs of

English boys are pretty bad. I don't know

if Japanese kids are any better in

these areas. It's good I don't really

stick out much.

YouTuber. I bet I'm the only famous

YouTuber who ever ate there.

Hey Siri,

¥3,500 in dollars.

$26. Oh, not bad. I thought it was like

$30. I guess the exchange rate is really

good. In my favor. $26 for all

you can eat and a beer. Not bad,

actually.

If you're fat and you eat a lot, you'd be

really getting your value for money.

$26, not bad at

all.

Did you see the girl driving that car?

She looks so young.

Who was driving

that car? Why was he shouting at him?

I'm pretty sure he saw me, so it wasn't

危ない.

What's going on here?

I don't get it. Why did he stop me and let

the car go? Surely I had priority.

Why? I, I would have priority. I was going

straight. That car should have given way

for me.

The traffic guy should have stopped the

car, really.

People don't know what they're doing.

I think I'm lost.

If I'm going straight,

I don't see why I would have to stop to

let a car join my road.

The car would have had to stop and come

after me.

It's just car favouritism.

So silly stopping me. Do you know who I

am? Ronnie Biggern!

How bloody dare you!

This is a weird place.

Oh, burn off the calories.

Very nice street, clean and tidy.

Oh, oh, my knees.

I think I'm gonna

push. Oh, my knees.

I can't rent a car. I don't have a

license. I have a British driving license,

but I don't have a permit.

Put your seat higher. I already

put the seat higher yesterday and my bike

has no gears. It's a one-gear bike.

I put my seat so high I have to tiptoe to

How are they cycling up this?

You are noob. I've been cycling

since I was 12 years old. I cycled

to school every day,

about 10 miles.

With my friends, Rob and Jay.

They used to come to my house to ring my

doorbell, and then we would leave

together on our bicycles to school. And

then one morning, they never came, and I

was waiting and waiting. They never came

to my doorbell. So I

decided to go because I couldn't wait

anymore. I get to school and they're

there, and I go to them and I say, why

didn't you come to my house? And then

stupid Rob was like, oh, I thought it'd be

funny if we didn't go to your house.

Yeah, really funny, Rob. Hilarious.

Nearly made me late for school.

Idiot.

Yeah, Rob's a dick.

I blocked him, I think, when I was about

17. I blocked him when I was about 17

because one day he randomly messaged me

something like ching chong ching ching

ching chong, like that,

without anything else. So I just blocked

him. I got fed up with racist

stupid jokes.

It's a shame because I used to like him.

We used to hang out a lot, play Warhammer,

play video games, and then I don't know

why he just became a dick around 16.

I used to go around his house and we

played Xbox.

I think maybe other kids bullied him for

hanging out with me. I used to have a

friend called Martin, and the other kids

bullied him for hanging out with me.

They were like, Oi, Martin, why are you

hanging out with the chinky?

And then he stopped coming around my

house. So then I

got very scared to make friends because

I felt like they wouldn't want to be

friends with me.

I lived in like the most chavvy,

low-class area. In Kent,

or one of the most.

Yeah, school friends. Last time I had

proper friends, I guess.

Whoa,

downhill!

Whoa,

whoa!

Whoa!

Imagine if Rob is watching. I doubt it.

Pretty sure none of them even remember me,

or maybe just barely.

Whoops, I was going the right way. Why did

I turn around?

Why don't you go to the beach? It's pretty

Do you think Chihiro still watches your

channel? Maybe. Maybe she saw

me at the yakiniku and felt sorry, and

then she's going to come and join me.

It seems like Tomoko is interested in

seeing me again. I told Tomoko I'm back in

Japan, do you want to hook up? And she was

like, why are you back in Japan? What are

you up to? How long are you going to be

here? Tomoko has always been nice to me

even though I kind of screwed her over on

my channel.

Maybe I can marry her.

How do I cross the road?

I think after these

cars go, I can cross.

Might as well go on the pavement.

This place is kind of like Maidstone,

actually. Don't know why I ended up

here. It's like the middle of nowhere

Japan. Not exactly Osaka,

is it?

I want to get back into the city, really.

But I guess this place is kind of

interesting.

Not really the Japan that I was expecting

to go back to. It's kind of like

countryside, isn't it? Almost.

La la la la la la

la la

la la la

la la la la la

la la la la la la la la la la la

la la la la la la la la la la la la la la

la la la la la la There's a big pond

somewhere.

Sayama. Sayama Station.

I think

this way.

Whoa, this is pretty steep.

50 miles per hour.

Oh, come on, red light.

Oh,

I can see it, it's over there. I wanted

to zoom down here.

I feel safer in Japan. Thailand, I feel a

bit scared. Around the non-developed

areas because of the dogs and the lizards

and the slummy-looking houses.

Oh, we're here.

Oh, there's a matsuri,

29th to the 30th. I think I missed it. It

Sayama Ike Matsuri.

Uh, how do I get in here?

Why can

I pop? Yeah.

Parker up.

I think I need to plug my battery charger

in. It's about 60%.

Bye-bye.

I can hear cute girls, loads of kids.

I don't think I've been here before.

Oh, I haven't been here.

Wow,

actually, I wish I brought my

bike up here. I could have ridden around

Oh wow, there's like a— I don't know,

block of bricks in the middle.

Oh, people look so happy.

Husband and wife with their kids.

Why is it half empty? Like the water is

drained. こ こ で さ や った ら さ カ ップ が 入

る んだ と。 行

く よ。 行

く よ。

カ メ

ラ マ ン さん で どう ぞ。 I

remember when I first— first few times I

used to come to Japan, I used to bring a

very big camera like a photography nerd,

and these kids would come up to me and ask

me, are you a cameraman? They'd be like,

kameraman desu ka? And I would

just ignore them and walk off because I

didn't know what to say. I'll just, I'll

just shake my head and say, iie,

iie, and then I'll walk off.

Must be so weird. I must have looked

so weird back then with my big DSLR, my

little, my little shoulder bag. I used to

carry this little shoulder bag to put my

lenses in. My stupid anime hair.

I must have looked so weird.

Yes, kids are quite,

um, willing to go up to strangers.

Strangers if they look funny.

Also, when I lived in Oita, which is in

Kyushu, it's like a very small town in the

middle of nowhere. Just walking around a

place like this, every time you walk past

kids, they would say konnichiwa.

And also in like countryside places, if

you, if you Hmm.

If you drive past like a group of school

kids on the road, they would stop and bow

at you. I think it's like part of the

school curriculum to teach the kids to

greet strangers,

to create like a community feeling in

the place.

There's a very wholesome vibe to Japanese

society. In England, they'd just be like,

oh, Fuck off, mate. Got a lighter,

mate? Oi, mate, got a lighter?

England sucks.

English— British society is just sick and

rotten.

Oi, mate, got a lighter?

Why you never went back to Oita to live

there? Because it's just a boring small

town. I did go back once when I

stormed out on Chihiro in 2019. I took the

bullet train back down to Kyushu, had sex

with this woman on Tinder, booked a hotel

in Oita. I think I met her in

the town next to Oita. The name was— I

can't remember,

like, uh, Saiki. I think it was like

Saiki. It was such a dead town, like

nothing, just one massive pachinko.

It was like an industrial kind of town.

Don't know if you remember when I vlogged

going to No one, no one

in the comments said, I wonder why

Daniel's in this place called Saiki.

You want to know why? Smashed this

35-year-old single mum on Tinder.

She found my YouTube channel. I don't know

how she found out about it. She asked me

what I do for a living and why I have a

GoPro. And then she just kind of assumed I

did YouTube, and then she found my

channel, and then she was like, oh,

please don't make a video about me.

I asked her to come back the next night,

but she said no. She said she was going to

have a foursome, and then she told me I

need to work on my fucking.

I can't remember what she said.

I don't think she was impressed with my

fucking— I thought it

was okay.

I don't know if these flies are

mosquitoes.

When you say 35-year-old, does it sound

very old to you? Yeah, I guess it used to.

Well, back then I was 29, so So yeah,

a 35-year-old seemed like an older woman,

but now it's just like a woman my age.

I even finished inside of her. It's crazy

how they're okay with just strangers

finishing inside. Can't really go around

the pond, I don't think.

And then after I finished seeing her, I

went to Oita for some nostalgia.

Someone coming.

I wonder if Chihiro wondered why I went to

that place. I think she may— might have,

um, suspected something,

but she didn't ask me. She seemed pretty

happy when I came back. I bought her some

Christmas presents, remember? Those

biscuits from the train station.

I think she was just happy to have me back

and we went back home to England for

Christmas. She was willing to put the Hong

Kong guy stuff behind us.

She was quite pretty though. She kind of

reminded me of the chlamydia girlfriend.

Kind of a wide face but with a flat nose.

Very small nose.

Wow, this is such a nice lake. I wonder

what that big building over there is. I

think these are mosquitoes. They better

not bite me. They don't seem to be

interested. They're pretty big.

Maybe they are males. I think only the

females suck blood for

the baby eggs. They want the iron.

Maybe I'm iron deficient and they can

I'm not really that interested in Japanese

women right now. I feel like it's too much

hard work.

I just— I really can't be bothered to go

There's not really enough time until

my girlfriend comes.

Plus I'm busy with streaming.

Yeah, I just want to chat up that

depressed lady, but she's so slow

replying. Let me check, she messaged me.

No, she messaged me this morning saying

she's gonna go and get false eyelashes put

in, and then I said, okay,

talk to you later.

Hmm, should I go up the bank or— looks

like I can go around it. All around it?

Oh my God, that would take ages. This

thing's huge.

Focus on streaming, forget Thailand,

girl.

I don't know,

I think streaming every day for a few

weeks is quite enough.

And then I'll do some vlogs while

Damn it, I should have brought my bike up

here. I could have biked around it.

Your channel's starting to get big again.

It's not. The streams are

getting like 5K views a stream, which is

the same as what I was getting in

Thailand.

I'm not even getting close to getting to

200 viewers. Again. Highest I got was like

170,

175 during the Thai girlfriend

phone call. 61% battery.

So the time I got the highest viewers

whilst being in Japan was because of the

Thai girlfriend phone call, not because

I'm in Japan. Because there was a bit of

drama.

You give up before anything can get going.

Well, that's how YouTube works. If it

doesn't succeed on the first, second,

third, fourth, fifth time, then it's

probably not going to ever succeed.

Things that succeed succeed in the first

try.

I would need a more clickbaity stream

title, like going on a date,

meeting up with Chihiro again, picking up

my girlfriend from the airport, will a

hater expose me live? That would get

clicks. Do you think some hater would come

track me down to Expose me.

Make some videos. I don't know what to

make a video about.

Wow, look at all the cherry trees down

there.

This place is so pretty. Look at this.

Oops, I was pointing the camera too low.

Let me point it again. It's hard to know

what the camera is pointing at.

Looks pretty good.

I want to take a picture.

Did you hear

those guys? They're talking about sex

friends. I think

I'm getting bitten on my leg.

Those guys are talking about sex friends,

and then he was like, oh, it's just like

whenever she wants it.

Dirty boys. I wish I had a Japanese sex

friend. 22, slim,

works in Lawson.

Doesn't look special. It looks nice when

you're here, doesn't really look that

impressive in person.

Oh shit, they're coming back.

I thought they're gonna beat me up.

I reckon Mila has HPV because who

was my last partner apart from the one

time with the 2 British girls?

This place is weird. It's got like a moat.

It's got like a moat. And a wall

going around it.

I think it's like a reservoir. Is it a

reservoir?

Ah crap, I've gone quite far from my

house. How do I go back?

Oh no, only 11 minutes. It looks far, but

it's only 11 minutes by bike. Okay, yeah,

we're gonna rest from the extreme biking

today. I need to heal.

Wow, look at this.

Do you have HPV? No!

Obviously I didn't give it to her. She

must have gotten it from her ex. I'm

clean.

Wow, look at the cherry trees here.

Do cherry trees actually make cherries? I

feel like they don't.

I like how the mountains surround

everything. It creates like this enclosed

feeling, nice backdrop.

It kind of gives, gives a feeling of

security, like the mountains are

protecting you.

What are you doing? Just going for a walk.

What's with the sirens? God,

the mosquitoes are everywhere.

Are they following me?

I think it's an ambulance siren.

Not sure.

Daniel, you need to make a video about

Japan to direct viewer to your streams,

my guy.

This is not good. What is not good? Oh,

thanks,

HK123. $1.

Is it

the air raid siren? Nuclear war.

Yeah, it'd be kind of ironic if Russia

dropped nukes on Ukraine and America was

like, oh, that's terrible, how dare you!

They can't really talk, they dropped one—

2 on Japan.

Isn't Japan in conflict with Russia over

those northern islands? There's a few

little islands above Hokkaido, the Ryukyu

Islands, and both Russia and Japan claim

them. And China claims some

islands There's always this dispute going

on with South Korea too over the— what are

they called? There's like an island, the

Dokdo Island. In Korea they call

it Dokdo Island. I don't know what they

call it in Japanese.

I forgot why.

I forgot why Japan claims them.

I think during World War II Japan took

them from Russia but then refused to give

them back after they lost.

So I don't think Japan and Russia are,

are on great terms.

Japan gonna get nuked too?

Can I go this way?

She seems like my type.

Single mother. Got overtaken

by single mothers. She looks like 36.

My target demographic,

the MILF Hunter.

MILF Hunter 66.

I think we're halfway around it. God,

this is going to take freaking ages. Oh my

God, I want to get back to my bicycle.

Okay, step up the pace. Just trying to

keep the video stable, but I need to speed

I'm 34, not 32.

Yeah, well, there's still MILFs.

I'm forever 20.

I never mentally developed past age 18.

Yeah, this would be a great park to just

bring a girlfriend to. Very peaceful,

very quiet. Don't have to shout or

raise your voice. Oh wow,

look at the moon! Can you see the moon?

The moon is shining.

What's the ratio of people older than you

versus people younger than you? Oops,

couldn't really see it. I needed to point

it higher. Let me try again.

Could you see it?

Oh, thanks,

HK123.

Uh, let me check.

What's the ratio of people older than you

versus people younger than you that you

have slept with? Uh, younger than me would

be Mila, Sayuri, French girlfriend,

Pia, Turkish girl,

German girl number 2. So that's 6,

I think 6. And then older,

Chihiro, ex-green girlfriend, single

mother girlfriend, Tomoko,

chlamydia girlfriend,

current girlfriend,

also 6. Pretty even.

Need to make a video about Japan to direct

viewers. Yeah, I need like a viral video

about tourism and cycling to

attract that crowd.

I want like an Only in Japan viewership,

like John Daub He just walks around train

stations, gets like 400-500 viewers.

Maybe if I did like a top 5 cycling tips

in Japan. Number 1, buy a phone

mount. It's really useful.

But it has to be a good video, you know,

with a nice intro, energetic. Hey guys,

my name's Daniel and I'm in Japan and

I'm here to teach you how to cycle in

Japan. You have like

a stupid kind of fake personality.

And you need some B-roll if you're

cycling, and nice video quality.

If I make negative videos, it's not going

to make people like me. They're just going

to hate me and not come back.

When the girlfriend comes The stream.

Hmm,

I will try and stay in Japan and let her

go back alone and then carry on doing the

Yeah,

I think Chris Broad puts on a, a persona

for his videos. It's not completely

different to his actual personality, but

you can tell it's like a persona that

he, he acts, he plays out a different

version of himself to make the videos

interesting and engaging. That's just what

presenting is like. It's no different

to TV presenting. You got to— you can't

just be yourself. You want to be a

presenter because you've got to be

professional and have like a tone in your

speech.

Yeah, I think Chris secretly hates

having to do this persona, but he knows

it's necessary.

I think he draws inspiration from Jeremy

Clarkson, Charlie Brooker.

I think he's trying to imitate that kind

of Charlie Brooker negative cynical sense

Well, he does it well. His channel is

really popular. He gets like— doesn't he

get like 6,000 viewers when he just does a

bland stream?

He did some random stream a couple weeks

ago or months ago where he was just

walking around for about 40 minutes

testing out a camera, I think, and he had

like 4,000 viewers.

Pretty good.

Anime Man gets a couple thousand viewers

too when he plays games on Twitch.

Connor gets like 20,000 viewers when he

does cycling and then about 10,000 viewers

when he plays games.

Connor is definitely the bigger streamer,

but Connor's into all the IRL stuff.

Okay, I think we're halfway around the,

the pond. Really should have brought my

bike. I didn't think this pond was so

big.

Well, Connor was the one who gave me the

ideas to do cycling stuff.

I never really thought of doing cycling

until I saw Connor do it. He made it look

fun. And then I saw Rob CD too do

Feels like Connor outgrew the other 2.

Yeah, I wonder how much money they make.

I'd be so interested.

The Anime Man has— I think he's

diversified more with his clothing brand.

He does other sponsorship deals and

jobs with other companies on their

channels. Wasn't Anime Man on the Netflix

channel interviewing the creator of

Cyberpunk anime? So the Anime

Man has branched out a lot more, and I

feel like YouTube is probably not his— it

doesn't make up his largest income, or

maybe— I mean, it's still his largest

income, but maybe just like 60%, and then

he's got like 40% split with his clothing

brand, sponsor deals, other jobs.

He definitely seems like he's worried

about the future of YouTube, so he's

trying to diversify. And then Chris seems

like he's mostly a YouTuber with

also Patreon. He makes a lot on Patreon,

I think like $40,000 a month on Patreon.

And then Connor's— I think Connor's Twitch

probably does almost as well as his

YouTube now.

Plus he gets really big sponsor deals too.

It's hard to tell.

Who would you think makes most— the, the

most money?

Maybe Conor.

Chris seems to have put almost all his

eggs one basket on YouTube because

Chris doesn't have any merch and you don't

really see him— have you ever seen Chris

do a sponsorship? I don't have seen a

sponsorship on Chris's videos where he's

like, sign up to Squarespace, 10% off.

I can't imagine Chris doing a sponsorship.

He would just look so grumpy. But all

right guys, this is G Fuel. It tastes

really good. I drink it every day.

Fucking buy it.

Now on to the video.

Do you think Nobita earns much? His

channel is not doing great recently.

Probably makes a couple thousand a month.

He never live streams, he just does

videos, which most don't get great views,

but then sometimes he'll, he'll get good

views on a few, a couple hundred K.

But it never seems to turn into a fan base

of any kind. I don't really think he has

fan base createability.

He's too robotic.

It's hard to like get a sense of who he

is. He just seems like a, like a robot.

Looks like we're cycling back in the dark

Knob eater. Why crime

has gone up?

I don't want to do the accent in front of

Japanese people.

Why crime has gone up? Because of I

mean, he kind of has a point though, but I

would— I wouldn't say either because I

don't want to get a strike. I reckon

crime would go up. I mean, they let in a

load of Nigerian people and they all

basically became scammers and like

doing crime stuff, criminal know stuff.

When all the Nigerians came in the '80s,

they mostly got jobs with the Yakuza

because they were good at pressing people

on the street to make sales and stuff

because they're intimidating.

I think Japan handed out something like

5,000 visas to Nigeria.

Stupid mosquito flew right in my ear.

Well, I bet they're really great with— I

mean, I bet they're really happy with that

decision.

It was a sign of goodwill.

I think it was to show the world that

they're not racist, and they're like,

hey, look, we're gonna let thousands of

Nigerians in because we're not racist.

Need to get back now, it's getting

dark. Oh, I can see stars.

2 stars.

I think I

only took one dump today.

When should I reset the stream? It's only

been four hours.

Sorry, sorry.

네네 네 내가.

What did

they say? They're saying something about

having dinner after school.

There's 2 big balls over there, look like

boobies. Can you see them?

Look, can you see?

Like 2 big boobies.

It's like that. Oh, did you see that guy?

Oh no, don't eff now. Damn it.

Ah, damn it, did it eff? It effed just as

this guy rode past on a really cool

looking bicycle with flashing green

lights on the wheels, and I was saying, I

want that for my bike.

I can't believe it. Why does

it F at the worst possible time?

He had like flashing green lights on his

bicycle wheel. I can

barely see anything now. I need to get

back to the bike.

Okay, what do we do tomorrow? I need

to tidy up the apartment. We have

to move out Sunday morning,

and then another long bike ride to the

slums. こ この 公 園 出 ら れ へ ん かった。

出 ら れ へ ん。 ここ で キ ャ ッ チ か いい ね。 Are

these bats or they birds? Why are there

birds flying around?

Wow, look at the river!

Next place I'm moving to is a crappy hotel

in the slum.

Wow, look at the pretty lights.

I'm not sure when my sister's coming to

She said May, but I don't know when in

Because then I wouldn't mind going back to

Thailand, see my sister,

uh, make some clickbait videos.