Mega Q&A with my Wife - Live Stream

Can

you

hear me? Hello? I don

't understand what 's going on.

I don 't know if you can hear me.

I don

't know how to use Open BS. I don 't know

what O BS stands for. Open bullshit.

Where is she?

Um, I think they

can hear me. Where 's your wife? Come

here, wife.

ひ ど い ね。 ひ ど い。 あ、

次 が 痛 い。 もう もう

一 人。 あ んな

逃 げ て る。 カ メ ラ やって ない よ。 Pre

view.Hello.OBS is

very difficult to use.Hello everybody.Why

did you end your last livestream early?

Which one? My internet might have

disconnected and I was too lazy to

reconnect.

What 's that sound?

There 's infinite windows happening. That

looks weird.

She hurt

her neck. I don 't know why, but she keeps

saying it 's painful. And then she went to

the doctors and they told her not to move

her head around too much. And she has this

cool pack that she puts on the pillow and

she sleeps on. She puts underneath her

neck, and the doctor said not to use that

anymore because it 's making it worse.

I hear clicking. Did you get a mouse?

Yeah, I got a nice gaming mouse. Oh, oh,

I missed it. Miss ed it.

I 'm using the built in microphone

in the laptop, so it probably sounds

really shit. I don

't think we need the chat on the left hand

side of the screen. We have one on the

right hand side.

That 's her gro aning, don 't mind it.

Chat box, get rid of that.

I could plug in my Blue Yet i mic. See if

that sounds better. No, I 'm not turning

on the camera. My hair looks funny.

What laptop did you buy? I bought an MS I

15 inch GT X 10 60 Core i 7.

It 's very nice.

Wait, I want to plug in my microphone.

Oh, K aka Pe ep, thank you very much.

You were almost a school shooter. No, we

don 't have guns in the UK. We 're not

Be honest, you were almost a school

shooter, right? I need

to set up the mic.

Editor, audio input

capture. This one.

It 's not working.

I don 't know how to set it up. It 's

plugged in.

Do you need help on Stream l abs? I 'm not

sure how to set up the Blue Yet i

microphone. The current

mic is the built in one.

It 's not working.

聞 こ えて ない ね。 多 分。 音 消 した

から それ。 ああ、 これ 音 元 から ない よ。 Peein

my mouth, I 'm thirsty. Maybe later.

Change the mic to the Yet i.

I don 't know how— and the

text to spe ech stopped working when I

plugged in the microphone. Device Manager.

What 's

your name in Fortnite? It 's H MR 66.

So I 'm on Device Manager. I think you can

see what I 'm doing. So where do I go?

Um, which one is it? Audio inputs and

outputs. Micro phone USB Advanced Audio

Device. This device

is working properly.

But where is

it? Is it this one? USB Advanced Audio

Device. It must be this one.

Hello, hello,

hello.

Proper ties.

Device USB.

Advance. Oh, it 's working! It 's working!

Ha ha ha! I 'm a genius. I 'm a

Oh, it 's working! It 's working! Ha ha

ha! I 'm a genius. What auto hear you

doing? I 'm a genius. Why the? Why is it

echo ing?

Wait, why is it echo ing now?

Why is it so distorted and echo ey?

Can you tell your wife to say hi? Say hi.

Hello, um, my neck so painful today.

Can you tell your wife to say hi? I couldn

't go work today.

Sounds better. Okay,

does it sound okay now?

これ 動

いて る。 うん、 動 いて る よ。 The

hero.I 'm not the hero.

I don 't tell my name.

Why is she mo aning? I don 't know, she

always does that. Oh,

my desktop audio is on. If I turn that

off, I 'm not sure.

Testing. My name is W ife y.

I think it sounds good now.

Does the mic sound too loud?

How many people looking now?

20 2. 20 2. The text to

spe ech thing stopped working after I

plugged in the microphone. Why?

Has your wife seen Tom oko 's videos?

Yes, she has. Yeah,

should we watch them now?

Oops, it 's not porn, it 's just a

woman rubbing her neck.

She has 1, 250 subscribers now.

Who the fuck is subscribing to her? Your

fan. Who 's this guy?

Your h

ater, maybe. How else? She 's still

uploading videos. 2 days ago.

Where 's the chat box gone? I can 't see

the chat now.

Um.

How do I do this?

What? It 's gone weird.

I 'm very confused. That 's

my Steam.

Pull the chat out. How 'd you do that?

It 's only showing half of Edge.

How do I put it back out to show you the

full thing?

Oh, I don 't know how to use this.

Um,

I have

no idea.

The split screen thing goes really bug gy.

Look, half of it 's disappeared. It 's

like it 's frozen in the split screen mode

and I can 't put it back into full screen

mode. Close window.

Just close everything.

Look, it 's doing it again at the bottom.

It 's really glitch y.

Okay, I think it 's, it 's kind of fixed,

but the bottom of the window of Edge has

disappeared.

Oh, I fixed it, I fixed it. It 's okay.

So this is Tom oko 's YouTube page and she

's still uploading videos. 2 days ago, my

adventure, I had 4 accidents, 240 views.

It must be boring.

Video.

Who the hell was that guy? I don 't know.

Tom oko 's videos are boring. I think so.

She hardly says anything interesting.

Explain what happened to your neck.

I don 't—

we did hard cereal yesterday.

Can you hear

my voice? 聞 こ えて る？

聞 こ えて ん の かな？ 聞 こ えて る よ。 あ、 そう。

Do you have a job besides YouTube? Yes, I

also stream on Twitch. twitch. tv dan

iel h ima.

Check out Lemon Party. It 's my site.

Does it have porn on it? I don 't want to

get banned from YouTube.

My next problem is the text to spe

ech and the alert box thing stopped making

any sounds after I plugged in the Blue Yet

i microphone. How do I fix it?

Does anyone know? Daniel broke my neck.

After I plugged in the microphone, the,

um, alert box thing stopped making sounds.

Alert box.

I didn

't touch her. She sleeps in a weird way.

She sleeps on her stomach with her neck

twisted to the side.

She has really bad posture when she

sleeps, and then she has this cool pack

that she puts underneath her neck, and

apparently that makes it worse. It 's

my blog. I 'll donate 100 if you go.

Okay, I 'll check it out on my phone.

What 's it called? Lemon party. org.

It 's a really bad idea to sleep on your

stomach and have your neck twisted 90

degrees. Of course it 's gonna hurt.

Hmm?

I didn 't know that putting a cool pack

underneath your neck would make it worse

though, because usually if you have a sp

rained ankle or some part of your body

hurts, you put something cold onto it to

make it better.

Does she

know what

cereal is? Yes, she does. Cold is for

sweating.

My accent rate is rubbish.

Rub bish,

rubbish, not rubbish.

If you

have questions for the wife, here 's your

chance. Everyone keeps saying, why don 't

your wife— why doesn 't your wife make a

video? We 'd love to hear what she says.

She 's right here, ask away.

I love her creepy sounding voice. What

does she know? Cre epy. So why do you

think my voice is creepy?

Oh, thank you,

Kai. Question for

your wife. To il et squid. Squid. Why is

your husband such a toilet squid? 変 な

の. It 's weird. My favorite

food is Korean barbecue.

I 'm 37 years old.

Why do you like Daniel?

I don 't know. What? He 's a good

That was

her answer. I don 't know. Why do

you like Daniel? Oh, very difficult

question. I always thinking why I 'm like

him. I couldn 't reply.

Because I 'm handsome. Because of money?

Hands ome. Hands ome. Do you think

Daniel is handsome?

What would you change about Daniel?

His grass is

not okay. What? That 's how I try to sting

y. C ring y.

My style? My— his grass.

Grass? My glasses?

Grass is gone. My grass? We got

new glasses, my friend. Told me

his glasses is very das ai.

C ring y. Ug ly. Ug ly. Everyone says my

glasses look horrible. C ring y. But we

went to buy new glasses. They should be

ready on the week— this weekend. He looked

like a teenager. C ring iest.

C ring y.

Would you let Daniel have cereal with Tom

oko or another woman?

Huh? Would you let Daniel have

cereal with another woman?

No.

And when was the last time you talked to

the Australian guy? Oh, last time,

only text. When?

Oh, 6 months ago. Really? I know—

I don 't know. Are you sure? He blocked

me. Maybe she said he blocked her on

Facebook and Line. Why would he block her?

Maybe we should leak his Facebook. Your

fan sent him the strange message,

maybe. Should we leak the Australian guy

's Facebook? Someone found his Facebook.

This German girl on Instagram sent me a

message saying, I found his Facebook, is

this him? She said it wasn 't that

difficult to find an Australian guy in the

K ans ai area. It 's kind of creepy

though. She said she wouldn 't tell him

about it. I don 't know if she was lying

or not.She seemed like a nice person. な ん

か す

げ え な。 早 い。 早 い ね。 ここ

読 んだ 方 が いい ん じゃない？ ペ

ン、 Why, man, will you leave rich boy?

Why is your accent better than Nor bert?

I don 't know. No b ita 's accent is

terrible. Because I 'm English teacher.

But No b ita spent how many years living

in Canada? His accent 's still really bad.

No b ita is a snake. I had a 40

minute conversation with him on Skype and

he said he was gonna use it for future

videos. He only used the conversation in

one video and I was only in it for about

about 5 seconds, and after that he didn

't put my clips into anything else.

I should expose him, create some drama.

What should the video title be? No b ita

is a prick. And then I asked

him, I sent him a message on Skype asking

him to send me the video of the entire

conversation so I could upload it onto my

channel. He didn 't even reply. He could

at least say, no, I don 't feel

comfortable with that. He just completely

ignored me. I know I should have recorded

it myself, but at the time I didn 't have

an iPhone and I didn 't know how to record

a Skype conversation.

I was in one of his videos a few months

ago. He only put me in for about 5 or 10

seconds. I can 't blame him because he

asked me a lot of difficult questions, a I

just answered with really lame answers

like, I don 't know. He said that his

friend said that I look like him. I don 't

look anything like him.No bita が ブ サ イ ク

だ。 The only thing that 's similar is I

wear glasses and so does he.

He even asked me if we could hang out if

he came to Osaka. I said okay.

Okay, he 's a snake. Calling him out now.

Any questions?

Do you like Fortnite? Yes,

my favorite game. That video

got really low views, doesn 't even have

5, 000 views.

It 's so annoying, people keep saying you

complain too much, why don 't you make a

video about something you actually like?

And then when I do, it only gets 5, 000

views in a day. I never get less than 10 K

views in a day. I guess most of

you guys don 't really care about video

Ask your

wife if she finds you romantic. Am I

romantic? No. Yes. Definitely no.

Cont r ary. He 's not

romantic. Not at all. Not at all.

He always He my room,

hiding in my room. It 's my room. I pay.

This is my room. I pay half. No, it 's

half my room, half yours.

So because of the Fortnite video, I don 't

think I 'm gonna make any more videos

about video games. It just doesn 't get me

views. I did want to make one

talking about Zelda, but I don 't think I

will now. Tell your English student about

your husband 's channel.

I must got fire— get fire. You get

fired? I don 't know, uh.

H iding

in my wife 's feet. Would you like

Daniel to be r ougher in bed? Would you

rough? Rough. 何 笑 か して く れる って こと？ ベ ッ ド で

激 しい 方 が いい。 首 が 潰

れる。 Work my neck.Can 't. She hurt her neck

now. I have to be gentle.

Has Daniel told you about his cock

fantasy? I have. How do you say in

Japanese? ネ ネ ト ラ レ。 ネ ト ラ レ フ ェ チ。

話 した で しょ。 ネ ト ラ

レ フ ェ チ の。 さ あ。 Daniel.

想 像 した ら ちょっと 興 奮 する。 ああ、 あ だから あれ か。 オ

ー スト ラ リ ア 人 の 話 が 出 た と き 興 奮

して た。 ネ ット ラ レ フ ェ チ。 He was excited

when I told about Australian guy

because ネ ット ラ レ フ ェ チ って なん なん て いう

イ ギ リ ス 語？ カ ック フ ァ ンタ ジ ー。 カ ック フ

ァ ンタ ジ ー。 It 's true.I get

turned on when she talks about having sex

with other guys. ど れ ど れ ど れ ど れ ハ ブ。 Ask

your wife if she sees you as a leech.Do

you think I 'm a le ech? Um,

not rich. He make

money himself, but sometimes he take

advantage me. So you know well.

No, I didn 't. No, I didn 't. No way. He

complained about me in the YouTube a lot.

I never used her money. I was upset,

but I made lots of money. He don 't give

me the money. I bought you a coffee

machine. Only coffee machine.

You see, that 's why I don 't like it when

people call me a le ech, because I never

used her money. I only use my money and

the money that people donate to me. But

then if you call a livestream er who gets

donations a le ech, then that makes every

single livestream er on the planet a le

At least I 'm not a cockro ach. Cock ro

ach. Oh, and by the way, it wasn 't my

idea to kill the cockro ach. My wife told

me to. She kept saying, kill, kill it,

kill it, kill it. I was gonna release it

outside. I cut out a piece of cardboard to

put underneath the cup, and I was gonna

scoop it up, but when I tried, 2 of its

legs had fallen off. Somehow it pulled off

2 of its legs, and it looked like it was

gonna escape from underneath the gap, so

we got out this bleach spray and sprayed

it instead. Do cockro aches even feel

pain? I don 't think they do.

Why don 't you get a bigger apartment?

That would be nice. It would be nice to

have a separate room to have a desk and a

proper computer. The laptop 's really

good, but the fan 's very noisy when I

play games on it. If I had a proper

computer I could get a graphics card that

had triple fans, and it would be really

quiet.

But we don 't really need to move. Would

you like to move? Move bigger place.

Ah. Boss is

fine. What 's fine?

Uh, big— bigger room is better.

I want a ts uk ue.

This room is narrow now. Only me,

it 's enough.

He— a lot of stuff are there

now. Because of Daniel,

he have he bought a lot of

stuff computer game and coffee

machine. That 's yours.

I only have a laptop, an iPad, two phones

in the switch. I throw away his winter

clothes closet. Yeah, she ch ucks away all

of my winter clothes. When I ran away.

When winter comes, I need to do a lot of

shopping. When?

When?

Winter.

全部 ユ ニ ク ロ で 買 った から。 ああ。 His

fashion sense is bad.It 's okay.

You should have seen my fashion sense 6 or

8 years ago. I used

to wear cargo trousers, like combat cargo

trousers with big pockets on the side.

Save your Switch for Smash Ultimate. I don

't know what to do with my Switch now.

Now I have a laptop, I don 't need a

Switch. I don 't need an iPad. The laptop

does everything.

I should have bought it in the first

place. Your wife as old as my mom. Why?

How old 's your mom? How old are you? Who

here has a mom who 's 37? You must

be really, really young then.

Sell them

on eBay. They don 't really use eBay in

Japan. Maybe I 'll do a giveaway, fan

giveaway, Switch and then my iPad, which

is full of my naked photos and dick

pics.36.My mom is 36.

そ っ

か 十 五 歳 や った ら 三 十 六 歳 や った ら そ

っ か。 Oh my God, I 'm sixty years old.

You 're older than some of their moms.

Why does she like younger men? Why would

she like older men? I don

't like old man 's physical appearance.

App ear ance? App ear ance.She said old

men are fat and ugly and bald.And

they smell stinky.Good.SASMR.

何 病 気？ あれ 支 え 合 いて る こと。 うん。

マ イ ク に。 ああ。

Your your wife likes skinny.Skin ny って さ め

っちゃ 細 い す ぎ る って こと？ 細 い って。 うん。 My

wife

should make ASMR videos. 声 が や ら

しい か。 う そ。 って よ く する から。 マ ジ？

It 's because she has asthma. She keeps

making this sig hing sound. I don

't know why she has so Make that sound

though. I think it 's just a habit.

苦 しい 息 が エ

ロ い な。 エ ロ い よ

それ。 Is

my Japanese better than your English?

ど っち が あれ かな、 お 前 から。 Which is better,

my English or his Japanese?

He always talk to only me.

If he talk the native Japanese, he wouldn

't understand what they say. Yeah,

I would. I 've

talked to lots of Japanese women in

Japanese. Well, only one to one. One to

one is easy. So too many people talking—

because I get nervous. Even if they were

speaking English, I wouldn 't say

anything. I passed

level 2 J LP T back in 2009.

That 's really difficult, you know. And I

nearly passed level 1 But I failed the

reading section. Reading 's really

I don 't speak to guys. I don 't speak to

Japanese guys. I don 't see the point. I

didn 't come to Japan to talk to men.I

can talk to men over the internet.

読 む の も 大 変 や。 読 む の 時。 聞 く の と

大 変 早 い。 So

you have Fortnite on iPad, iPhone,

Switch, and PC? Yeah, all of this is

because of Fortnite. I downloaded on my

phone, then I bought a Switch, then I

bought the Pro Controller, and then I

bought the laptop mainly to livestream and

play Fortnite.

Does your wife see you as an Asian man or

Western guy? I almost ex boy friend

are Asian guys. No, what do you see me?

What do you see me? Ah, do I look like

Asian or Western? Ah,

his mind is a Western,

I think. Not Japanese personality. He 's

not Japanese. But what do I look like?

Look like Western or Asian?

Asian.

Asian. That 's why I can 't get

a cute Japanese girlfriend.They only like

white guys. 残 念 でした。 What is

lig ma? People keep mentioning this lig ma

thing. Is it a new meme?

Ligma って 何？ I 'm

zero zero point one percent black on my

DNA test. It said forty percent

Chinese, five percent Southeast Asian,

forty eight percent. Caucas ian, one

percent Liber ian or something, and then

zero point one percent black.Hmm.

早 い。 いつ も こんな 早 く ない

の に、 い っぱ い メ ッ セ ージ。 Too many people

sending a text. 実 は こんな に 人 が。 い ない

よ。 普 通 は 百 人、 百 五 十 人 ぐ らい。 今日は

二 倍。 Why your wife want to

be with you? I don 't know.

Stop saying I don 't know.

She says I look Japanese when I have my

glasses on because it makes my eyes look

smaller, but when I take them off, I look

More Western.Western という よ り、

まあ ミ ック ス みたい な。 It

would be

interesting if my wife got a DNA test.What

would it come up as? 100 Japanese? I think

so. But then Japanese people come from

China, so wouldn 't it say 100 Chinese?

Wow, I don 't think it traces it back that

far. If you trace it all the way back,

everyone 's from Africa. Why did you marry

Daniel? Why? Why?

He want to with me. I want to be with you.

It 's a simple question. Simple reason why

everybody asks me, so do you— why do you

want to be with him or get married with

him? My friends also asked me why.

No, Mark, many simple, simple questions.

Because she likes me. That 's the only

answer. Why else would she want to be with

me? Because I 'm a secret millionaire.

What if

you have Ain u? Ain u か 入 って た ら。 私？

なん で？ Why do you think I am I? What Ain u?

I don 't know.Daniel は あ なた が 彼 の ため に

年 を 取 ってる と い った どう いうこと？ 変 な 日本 語。

彼 の ため には 年 を。 よ

く わ から ない。 でも や っぱ り 日本 語 の 方 が 読 み

や す い。 パ ッ と 目 に 入 って く る けど。 Daniel said

you are growing old for him.Doesn 't make

Someone please tell me if Asians get

circum c ised. I don 't know. Do Japanese

people get circum c ised? 意 味 わか

る。 サ ク ン サ イ ズ な に 環 境 環 境 上、 新

陳 の 皮 膚 を 切 る？ 知 ら ない そんな こと え？ Japanese

guy the cats they don 't

do it Japanese people don 't circum c ise.

Circ um c ised. Sn ip,

cut off the fore skin. I hear Turkish,

Turkish guys. Oh, I should ask my sister.

Hus sein is Turkish.

Oh shit, I just said his name. I just

said his name. K ats ura, k ats

ure, k ats ure. Circ ums. Hey, I don 't

understand how you can be circum c ised,

be comfortable being circum c ised. It

must feel horrible having the tip of it

rub against the inside of your underwear

all the time. That 's not his name, stop

writing it. I don 't think he 'll be

happy. It happens

sometimes. For example, if I get an ere

ction in my pants and then it goes back to

normal, the fore skin pe els back and then

the tip of the penis is exposed. And it 's

rubbing against the inside of my pants,

and it feels really uncomfortable. How do

you deal with that? I guess it gets less

sensitive.

I like having a fore skin. F ores kin, 日本

語 で なん て いう? Fores kin って 何 だ?

何? チ ンチ ン の 皮 膚。 チ ンチ ン の 皮 膚 か?

サ ッ キ の 皮 膚。 うん。 あ どう した？ なん という

日本 語 で？ チ ンチ ン の 皮 膚 って 何？ チ ンチ ン の

皮 膚。 The fore skin。 うん。 Japanese

guy keeping you.Ah. これ。 BJ。

あ、 ホ ケ？ ホ ケ。 ホ ケ。

I don 't know how to say fore skin in

Yeah, how do you masturb ate without a

fore skin? I think that 's the whole

reason why people cut fore sk ins off in

the first place. The reason people circum

c ise babies is to stop them from masturb

ating. So if you can 't masturb ate,

you 're going to be more motivated to go

out into the world and find a woman.

Otherwise, you just hide in your room

masturb ating the whole day. I 'm no

religion. Religion? Religion で 合 ってる。

オ ナ に でき ない よ。 フ ォ ー ス キ ン が な かった

ら。 ああ、 オ ナ に し す ぎ る

から。 オ ナ に でき ない ように

切 ら ない。 切 る ん じゃない？ へ ー。

I think it 's

kind of barbar ic though, just cutting off

a piece of a baby.

And the baby doesn 't even get to decide

if, if he wants to have it cut or not. If

you circum c ise someone, you should at

least wait until they grow up into an

adult so they can make the decision for

で しょ。 What

is the channel in

the background? It 's the Japanese woman

who cat f ished me. She pretended she was

27, and then I met her. She looked like an

old woman. I 'm

glad I 'm not circum c ised. I like

masturb ating. If I didn 't have a

fore skin, I 'd have to use l ube all the

She told me she was 41.

I don 't think she is. I think she 's

I think she 's at least forty five. Hmm.

I don 't know.Maybe she just aged badly.

五 十 以上 だ よ。 Why

does she look—

but age doesn 't really matter that much.

It 's genetics. I 've met women younger

than my wife who looked uglier and older.

ど れ？ ダ ネル。 ダ ネル は 変 な

人 でしょう。 私 は 富 山 に 住 んで る ので、

富 山 に 住 んで る の に デ ート でき ない で しょ。 私

と デ ート し ません か？ オ ー スト ラ リ ア 人 だ。 オ

ー スト ラ リ ア 人 っていう だけ で。 バ カ。 Her

favorite kind of guy, Australian.

Australia. Australia. I lived

in Australia, um, 5, 6 years ago.

I didn 't say my wife 's ugly and old. I

said I 've met Japanese women who are

younger than her that were also ug lier

and looked older than her, even though

they were younger. You don

't need l ube, just spit in your hand.

Spit isn 't very good; it dries up

quickly.You need to keep spitting on

it.Cond o

して あ げ る。 臭 い。 I lived

in Brisbane.Brisbane.If

you could change one thing about Daniel,

what would it be? Ah, no, uh,

too many. Too many.

Just one. Just one. You can only change

one thing. Um,

one, two,

I hope Social

anxious. N end ake? Social anxiety. Ah,

それ が 治 る と いい な。 あ か ん 治 った ら あ か

ん 治 った か ん。 No way, no no no no. He said

it would be nice if I didn 't have social

anxiety. なん で 治 った ら あ か ん?

Because if he don 't have a social and

society, I will be David Bl aine. Yeah,

yeah. Social anxiety is the only thing

holding me back from becoming David Bond

version 2. I 'd

be chatting up everyone. I wouldn 't need

Tinder. The only reason I need Tinder— I

needed Tinder was because I didn 't have

the guts to go to bars or night cl ubs or

to approach women. If he don 't have

a social and society, so,

uh, he,

he is— isn 't in Japan,

maybe. Why not? I still

like Japanese women. English women are

ugly, no offense. Um,

he still comes to Japan even if I Didn

't have social anxiety.

I think social anxiety is the one thing

that 's holding me back from everything.

From working, getting a good job, getting

an education, social izing. But that 's

what makes me me. If I didn 't have social

anxiety, I 'd be a completely different

person.

What do you think of David Bond?

Just watching is like, but if he

is my boyfriend,

nightmare. I don 't choose him.

Maybe. Do you think he 's

attractive? He 's not my type.

Australian guy is better.

Why is Australian guys better?

Uh, why? Uh, they 're

confident. I have this image of Australian

guys being really confident and cock y,

arrogant.

Uh, he have— he

is sensitive and he have confidence.

そう ひ なん て いう の、 ど っち も 持

って た と思 う。 オ ー スト ラ リ ア 人 興 奮 し ちゃ

う よ オ

ー スト ラ リ ア 人 全部、 全 員 が 全 員 に 興

奮 し ちゃ う オ

ー スト ラ リ ア 人。 あれ だから ね。 明 る い から ね。 I

don

't like fore play. Fore play is boring.

Are there any men here who actually like

fore play? Fore play, Danny? Zen ki. Ah,

his fore

play is very short. We don 't even do fore

play.

Fore play 's boring. You 're just kissing

and c udd ling. You can do that whilst you

're doing it. Fore play 's

fun for like the first five or ten

seconds, but then after ten seconds you

want to get it in, don 't you?

What are you waiting for? Just get it

started. It 's

like if you 're really hungry and you go

to a restaurant, and then you start

rubbing the burger all over your face

instead of eating it straight away.

早 く 食べ たい って お 腹 減 った ら。 早 く 食べ た ら

いい よ。 お 腹 空 いた ら。 I

've never

really liked fore play. Maybe I would if I

did it with someone who 's really

hot.Daniel は ロ マ ンチ ック じゃない よ。

ロ マ ンチ ック だ よ。 Everything about

Daniel is short.I 'm

five foot nine. I think that

's average in Japan. Jin jin no k isa?

Ch iga o shin cho. Ah,

five foot nine. 百 七 十

五 セ ンチ。 I think

I 'm five foot eight point eight, but if I

wear shoes. I 'm definitely over five foot

nine.175

電 池 って 書 いて る。 電 池。 電 池。

That 's

why I 'm not into white women; they 're

too tall. They make me feel insecure.

White women. White? Ah. In England, lots

of women are the same height as me.And the

heavy weight.Yeah.

見て る よ YouTube ダ ニ エ ル 以 外。 She watches

boring stuff on YouTube, like makeup stuff

or fashion. And the Dog,

animal, animals.

Daniel, that 's not how you spell Daniel

in Japanese. ダ ネル、 ダ ネル、 ダ

ネル、 ダ ネル、 ダ ニ エ ル、 ダ ニ エ ル。 I

'm not つ ま ら ない。 I 'm the most interesting

person in the world. Aren 't I?

何？ 俺 が 世界 で 一 番 面 白 い 人 で しょ。 ああ。

He is narciss istic.No.I

am not.I am the most humble person ever.No

way.Daniel

's the best name. It 's not too mach o.

It has a sensitive side to it. That 's why

there 's so many Daniel s in the world.

But I feel like someone who 's named

Daniel will never become super, super rich

and successful. Maybe just average.

Do you know any famous Daniel s?

誰 が いる？ Daniel.Daniel Craig,

James Bond. That 's it. That 's all I can

think of. Daniel Rad cl iffe, Harry

Potter. Ah,

Daniel Wellington.

I don 't like it when people call me Dan.

Hey, Dan. All right, Dan. White people

often say you should get divorced with

Daniel. My friend also say you should,

you should get divorced with him.

Call her now. Make it.

Call her phone.

I don 't like it when girls call me Dan.

It 's It 's weird.

It 's not Dan, it 's Daniel.

Dan sounds like someone who 's a bit dim,

who Works at McDonald 's, washing dishes,

and then plays Call of Duty on the

weekends. 離 婚 して る の を 見 たい だけ だから いい ですか?

Everybody happy if

someone are not happy.Who

thinks we should get divorced? Who think?

Who thinks? 私 も。 My friend? 違う。 どう いうこと?

み んな に 聞 いて る。 離 婚 した 方 が いい と思 ってる 人

は? 誰? 言 って。

え、 誰 が 誰 が? 離 婚 した 方 が いい? み んな に 聞

いた。 み んな yes yes yes って 言 ってる? I think so.

Me, me. Why do you think we should get

Everyone thinks we should get divorced.

Boss,

ひ ど

い ね。 うん ひ

ど い。 No,

don 't be boss.

I 'm

uns ubs cribing. Why? You can 't just uns

ubscribe without telling us why.Visa

の ため だけ 結 婚 した から じゃない。 Every body thinks

so.He get my got married for visa.But

we did, kind of. We wanted

to stay together, and the only way to do

that was for me to get a visa. So yeah,

in a way, we did get married for a visa.

If I didn 't need the visa, then we wouldn

't have gotten married so quickly.

Yes, it 's true.My My

mother and my sister. 何 だ

っ け 反 対 して る って 反 対 して る

って。 still now.Her mom and sisters are

still against it. 知 ら ない で しょ 結 婚 した って。

They still don 't know we got married.I 知

ら ない で しょ。 I told my sister, but I Didn 't

talk much. You told your sister? When did

you tell her? In the in lying.

When? I didn 't know you told her.

結 婚 した って 言 って ない かな。 わか ん ない。 覚 えて ない な。

なん で 覚 えて ない？ 重要 で しょ。 Everyone

who gets married overseas gets married for

a visa.Visa because they want to stay

together, and that 's the easiest way to

do it.

So she said she doesn 't remember if, if

she told her sister or not, and her mum

doesn 't know.

They don 't even know what I 'm like.

They never even met me. I haven 't talked

to my mom, uh, from March. Since March.

Since March. Since March.

No b ita. What do you think of No b ita?

I don 't know about No b ita. Uh, she

thinks he 's ugly. Not ugly,

he 's not handsome.

They think I 'm a translator.

They don 't— I don 't think they know I 'm

a YouTuber. Her sister knows I do YouTube.

Yeah, but maybe she can

't understand in English. If she

find his YouTube channel She

won 't understand.

Why did she divorce her ex? Why did—

oh, difficult question. Uh, my ex

hus band had debit and

lots of debt. Uh, so, so, so, lot of debt.

And we were 6

stress for 5 years.

5 years. How long

did it take to learn h ir ag ana? It took

about a week for h ir ag ana and kat ak

ana. Kan ji takes years. There 's

still lots of kan ji I can 't read. I

lived in Australia about 9

months or 10 months,

I didn 't speak English at

all.

But No b ita doesn 't have social anxiety.

He just talks to random strangers on the

street. Thank you,

Dun geon MV. Do you

have

advice? You broke

up

with your girlfriend two months ago.

You think she could forgive me?

な んで 別 れた? Why did you break up?

Do you speak to each other mostly English

or Japanese? Japanese most of the

time. When we argue, I swear at her in

English. I understand everything what he

say, especially he complain something.

It just feels better to complain in

English. Why did you marry Daniel?

Because I 'm romantic. No, not romantic.

Char ming and kind.

Why did you your wife break up with a

Colomb ian? N anda Colombia guy na? Muk

ashi no han ashi. I had a Colomb ian

boyfriend friend. Wasn 't it just two

weeks? A few weeks. Few weeks.

3 months, only 3 months. 3 months. Was he

Spanish, Hispanic?

Oh, in trouble. Why did you break up?

Because I have

to go to Australia. You broke up with him?

I didn 't broke up with him. We are,

we were talking on Skype when

I was in Australia.

But he, he said he wanted to break up.

No, but he actually, he got married.

He got married in his country. I didn 't

know it. Joseph 2. 0, thank you, thank you

for reading my comment. Really Really

appreciate it, man. Like the videos you

make. Don 't stop what you do. Thank you.

I can 't remember which comment that was

though. So the Colomb

ian guy left you? No, not left me.

So I came back Japan after 9

months, so I met him. He said Um,

we— he want to keep relationship,

but one of my friend told

me he got married with in his country,

so that 's why we broke up. He wanted to

be your sex friend? Uh, he didn 't say it

's sex friend, but it 's like a sex

friend. So it is a sex friend.

You can 't say it 's like a sex friend.

Every guy wants to have a sex friend.

Kai Sad ist, thank you. Ask your wife if

she wants to have a Le ech Junior. Rich

Junior. Daniel Junior. Maybe Rich Junior.

So pretty, cute.

My— his mom want to My

mum wants a grand child,

but my mum would have to come all the way

to Japan to see it, or we would have to

take the baby on the plane, and I always

complain about babies on planes. It would

be hypoc rit ical of me if I did the same.

What the

hell is wrong with you, Daniel? I watched

a few of your v ids. You are absolutely s

icken ing. Charlie Ch ia, are you that

Charlie I know, or you someone pretending

to be her? I know this girl called Charlie

from Malaysia. I met her like eight years

ago, and we used to speak on the internet.

Huh? This この 人 だ よ。 誰 が 誰？ Char lie Chia.

ご どう した ん？ What 's wrong with Daniel?

Are you—

what is wrong

with you, Daniel? Are you— you 're

absolutely s icken ing. It 's not very

nice, Charlie. We used to be very good

friends. I don 't know if that 's actually

you or if it 's someone pretending to be

you. That 's weird.

I can 't stand it when people bring babies

onto aer oplan es and then it cries the

whole time.

They are sitting in the front always.

They are sitting front. We should

avoid sitting the front. She puts sell ota

pe over its mouth to feed it tranquil

izers. Dun geon MV thought she didn 't

love me anymore. Took a lot of things like

Sky ping at night for granted, even though

even thought she Was busy. I was just a

selfish asshole. Ah,

さ っ き 彼 女 と 別 れた 人。 Just

go on Tinder, find someone new. ま た 寄 ってる。

That 's what I did when Say aka. You

always say. When Say aka dumped me for the

Czech Republic guy, I was really sad for

about two weeks. I cried every night, and

I went straight back onto the internet,

and I found. Say uri, my first real

Japanese girlfriend, and then I came to

Osaka. Say aka Say uri,

the one who had a massive face

like a watermelon.

ひ ど い ね。 本当

に あの 人 だ。 あ の 人 みたい。 You were a bit weird

when I met you nine years ago, but I didn

't know you were this dark. How did you

find my YouTube channel? What do you mean

I 'm dark? I 've always been this way.

You just didn 't know me that well. この 人

知 ってる よ。 彼 氏、 彼 氏 ので で で い と この 彼 女？

違う。 違う？ 十 年前 ぐ らい 日本

の 恋 愛。 関 係 サ イ ト で 知 り 合 った マ

レ ー シ ア 人 の 女 の 子。 六 年 違う、

四 年前 ぐ らい マ レ ー シ ア に 行 った と き シ

ン ガ ポ ール で 一 日 会 った。 ス ー シ ー 食べ に

行 った 一 緒 に。 俺 の 悪 口 して る 今。

So if no one knows who this Charlie is,

let me try and explain who this Charlie

person is. So about nine years ago when I

was looking for a Japanese girlfriend, I

used to be subscribed to all of these

Japanese online dating websites, and I met

this Malays ian girl called Charlie, and

we used to talk to each other a lot, and

she was really obsessed with Japan as

well, and we 'd always talk about learning

Japanese and anime and stuff like that.

And I actually met her about 4

or 5 years ago when I went to Malaysia.

We met in Singapore. We went to have sushi

and it was really weird, and after that we

kind of stopped talking to each other. I

don 't know if it 's for sure 100 her or

someone pretending to be her, but it seems

kind of random for it to not be her. I 've

never spoke of her before.

We were friends. Don 't deny it. We were

internet friends for several years.

And your Japanese is shit, by the way.No

offense.Hmm.

日本 語 下 手 く そ あの 人 は。 あ、 そう。

Does your friend think you 're some

Nothing happened between me and Charlotte.

The only thing that happened was we met

and we had lunch. We went for sushi in

Singapore once.

I think she lives in Japan now.

I don 't know where she lives, maybe

I didn 't think you would be so obsessed

to actually check out my channel.

Charlie 's a guy 's name. I know, I kept

telling her that as well. It 's not her

real name, she has a Chinese name,

but most— nearly all Chinese people have

an English name because their Chinese

names are impossible to pronounce for the

rest of the world. I don

't think Charlie would speak to me like

that though. I 'm calling it out as a

troll. I think it 's a troll unless you

say something that only the real Charlie

would know about. So many trolls, I don 't

know who to believe these days.

Has your wife been to a host club?

Once a time because my

brother was working there. Your brother

was a host? Yeah,

I went with

my sister, so we, we pretend to—

we are not a sister, brother. But my

brother and sister faces is very similar.

No one realize I 'm his sister.

So other guy flattering me.

Fl irting with you? Fl irting with me, so

it was exciting. How much did you

pay? Only 2, 000 yen.

50 yen. 2,

500? Ah, so it 's 500 yen. It 's

not very much because only it 's

a trial. T rial? T rial.

First time, and it was the event.

Did you like it?

He is very kind. He was very kind and

romantic. Rom antic. More romantic

than Daniel. They 're professionals. That

's what they get paid for, to chat women

up and make them feel good. Really talk

ative. Host s make a lot of money. There

was a documentary on TV about them. They

get really drunk. They get really messed

up. They have to drink a lot. Lo ads.

They have that weird hairstyle. My brother

had a weird hairstyle.

He was not— he was normal, looked like

normal guy.

Can 't believe you are calling me a troll

now just to make it look like I 'm lying.

I 'm not saying you 're lying, I just— I

'm saying I don 't believe that you 're

actually Charlie. Say something that only

Charlie would know and

then I 'll believe you. It 's just very

out of character. Charlie 's a very nice

girl, she wouldn 't speak to me like this.

But I do find it strange, very random,

that a troll would pick Charlie of all

people. To pretend to

be. I don 't know

what Chinese—

I don 't know how to read Chinese, so I

don 't know why you 're typing in Chinese.

これ 読 め る？ ど れ？ な い

日本 語 で それは 似 て る 感じ は ある けど。 We

need proof it 's the real Charlie.

You are does your wife know

you are gay?

Daniel don 't speak K

ans ai Ben. I think it 's silly. I like

Hy o Jun. Do you have to be separated for

a year in order to get divorced in Japan?

What? Do you have to be separated for—

You can get divorced the very next day if

you wanted to.

I worked in Australia

in the farm. I was picking the

strawberry and zucchini. It was

tough, hard. I hate it.

If you

're the real Charlie, send me a message

now on Instagram. See ya.

Otherwise, I don 't believe you.

K ans ai Ben is awesome. I think so.

Look, ah, この 人 だ よ。 チャ ー リ ーチ ェ ア。 へ え、 可愛

い よ。 可愛 く ない よ。 顔 が で っ か い。 め

っちゃ で っ か い よ。 これ と 比 べ た ら。 写

真 は 可愛 く 見 える けど、 実 際 は ちょっと 違う

ね。 It was walking.Holiday.So

before, the salary was good.

Recently, so my Australian friends say it

's cheap. I 'm not sure.

Australia sucks.

Why? I don 't see the appeal of

Australia. I guess it 's appealing if you

're Asian. It 's the closest Western

country in Asia.

Imm igration immigrants many immigrants

are living in Australia. Australia now

so many Chinese are living.