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Recording

The Worst Job I EVER had

2020-06-05 · 11 min

internet_archive
Machine transcript · wording, timing and speaker attribution may be wrong

Wording, speaker labels, and timestamps can still be wrong. A transcript does not establish that statements in the recording are factual. Use the source links and surrounding context.

Source information & transcript revisions

Transcript revisions

  1. rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59Machine-generated and unreviewed; may be wrong; not a verified quotation.
    enraw_asractive198 segments

Transcript

en
  1. When I was a young boy, my father took me

    Segment details0:00–0:02 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_0
  2. into the city to see a marching band, and

    Segment details0:03–0:06 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_1
  3. on the way home we walked past this shop

    Segment details0:06–0:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_2
  4. called Games Workshop, and I had never

    Segment details0:09–0:11 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_3
  5. seen this shop before. They had all these

    Segment details0:11–0:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_4
  6. interesting things on display. There were

    Segment details0:13–0:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_5
  7. these futuristic-looking soldiers and

    Segment details0:16–0:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_6
  8. tanks, and it all looked very fascinating.

    Segment details0:18–0:21 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_7
  9. I asked my dad, Daddy, can I have one of

    Segment details0:21–0:23 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_8
  10. those? And he said, yes, Daniel, yes you

    Segment details0:23–0:26 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_9
  11. may. And that was how my addiction to the

    Segment details0:26–0:28 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_10
  12. tabletop miniature game Warhammer 40K

    Segment details0:29–0:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_11
  13. began. Well, actually, that wasn't how it

    Segment details0:32–0:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_12
  14. began at all. I just thought that sounded

    Segment details0:34–0:35 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_13
  15. more interesting. What actually happened

    Segment details0:36–0:37 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_14
  16. was one day I went over to my friend's

    Segment details0:38–0:39 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_15
  17. house and he showed me his Ork collection,

    Segment details0:39–0:42 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_16
  18. and I thought, wow, that looks cool,

    Segment details0:42–0:43 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_17
  19. maybe I'll get some as well. So I did,

    Segment details0:44–0:45 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_18
  20. and then we started battling each other's

    Segment details0:46–0:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_19
  21. armies like a couple of nerds. With

    Segment details0:48–0:50 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_20
  22. Warhammer 40K, you need to build an army,

    Segment details0:50–0:52 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_21
  23. and And you need to buy boxes of infantry

    Segment details0:52–0:55 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_22
  24. and vehicles, and they would cost about

    Segment details0:55–0:57 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_23
  25. £20 each. A tank would cost nearly £40.

    Segment details0:57–1:00 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_24
  26. The rulebook cost £40 on its own. It was

    Segment details1:00–1:03 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_25
  27. like this massive, thick, huge book. And

    Segment details1:03–1:06 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_26
  28. as you can imagine, 14-year-old Daniel

    Segment details1:06–1:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_27
  29. didn't have much money because he didn't

    Segment details1:08–1:10 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_28
  30. have any jobs or YouTube channels. So he

    Segment details1:10–1:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_29
  31. begged his mummy, who at the time was

    Segment details1:14–1:15 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_30
  32. working at a battery chicken farm, if he

    Segment details1:15–1:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_31
  33. could go along with her to help her work

    Segment details1:19–1:20 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_32
  34. and earn some pocket money. Every day

    Segment details1:21–1:23 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_33
  35. after school, I would come home so I could

    Segment details1:23–1:25 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_34
  36. sit in my bedroom painting and gluing

    Segment details1:26–1:27 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_35
  37. these toy soldiers together. I used to

    Segment details1:28–1:30 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_36
  38. love it, actually. Maybe I'll get back

    Segment details1:30–1:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_37
  39. into it someday. Anyway, I was really

    Segment details1:31–1:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_38
  40. desperate for money, and luckily my mum

    Segment details1:33–1:36 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_39
  41. said yes, and she let me come along with

    Segment details1:36–1:38 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_40
  42. her to work. And it was a really tough

    Segment details1:38–1:41 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_41
  43. job, probably one of the worst jobs I've

    Segment details1:41–1:43 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_42
  44. ever had. I really hated it, but I was so

    Segment details1:43–1:45 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_43
  45. desperate for money at the time, I was

    Segment details1:46–1:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_44
  46. able to do it. So first of all, we had to

    Segment details1:48–1:50 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_45
  47. wake up at 5 AM in the morning. So early.

    Segment details1:50–1:54 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_46
  48. At that age, I had never had to wake up so

    Segment details1:54–1:57 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_47
  49. early before, and it was like torture. I

    Segment details1:57–2:00 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_48
  50. couldn't stand having to wake up so early.

    Segment details2:00–2:03 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_49
  51. Dragged myself out of bed, we got into the

    Segment details2:03–2:05 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_50
  52. car, and then she would drive us to the

    Segment details2:05–2:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_51
  53. farm, and In the car, I would start

    Segment details2:08–2:11 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_52
  54. falling asleep again, and then we would

    Segment details2:11–2:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_53
  55. arrive at the farm, and there were these

    Segment details2:13–2:14 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_54
  56. buildings because, you know, they had all

    Segment details2:15–2:17 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_55
  57. the chickens in them in cages. I don't

    Segment details2:17–2:20 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_56
  58. know if they do that anymore. I think that

    Segment details2:20–2:21 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_57
  59. got outlawed in England. And we had to go

    Segment details2:22–2:25 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_58
  60. into one of these battery chicken farms,

    Segment details2:26–2:28 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_59
  61. and it was so horrible in there. It smelt

    Segment details2:28–2:30 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_60
  62. revolting. There was no ventilation in

    Segment details2:31–2:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_61
  63. there apart from this really tiny window,

    Segment details2:33–2:35 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_62
  64. and the air was just thick with the smell

    Segment details2:35–2:38 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_63
  65. of chicken feces. It was so, so bad

    Segment details2:38–2:42 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_64
  66. that after standing there for a few hours,

    Segment details2:42–2:44 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_65
  67. you could begin to taste the smell in your

    Segment details2:44–2:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_66
  68. mouth. You could actually taste it in your

    Segment details2:47–2:49 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_67
  69. saliva. It was like you were eating

    Segment details2:49–2:51 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_68
  70. chicken poop. So the job involved us

    Segment details2:51–2:54 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_69
  71. standing by a conveyor belt which carried

    Segment details2:54–2:57 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_70
  72. eggs along to us, and there'd be so many

    Segment details2:57–3:00 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_71
  73. eggs. There'd be hundreds and hundreds.

    Segment details3:00–3:02 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_72
  74. They would just keep coming and keep

    Segment details3:02–3:03 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_73
  75. coming, keep coming. And then we had to

    Segment details3:04–3:06 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_74
  76. collect the eggs and place them into these

    Segment details3:06–3:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_75
  77. cardboard trays. And you might be

    Segment details3:08–3:10 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_76
  78. thinking, oh, that doesn't sound so bad.

    Segment details3:10–3:12 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_77
  79. You just stand there and then you pick up

    Segment details3:12–3:14 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_78
  80. eggs and put them into a tray. Oh no, the

    Segment details3:14–3:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_79
  81. eggs were absolutely disgusting. They

    Segment details3:16–3:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_80
  82. weren't nice clean eggs that were coming

    Segment details3:18–3:20 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_81
  83. along. Some of them— well, most of them

    Segment details3:20–3:22 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_82
  84. were covered in poop, and then some of

    Segment details3:22–3:25 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_83
  85. them were covered in blood, and then some

    Segment details3:26–3:27 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_84
  86. of them weren't even developed properly

    Segment details3:27–3:29 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_85
  87. and didn't have shells. And we weren't

    Segment details3:29–3:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_86
  88. allowed to use gloves because gloves would

    Segment details3:31–3:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_87
  89. make it slippery. You might get the gloves

    Segment details3:33–3:35 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_88
  90. stuck in the conveyor belt mechanism. So

    Segment details3:35–3:38 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_89
  91. you just end up constantly touching

    Segment details3:38–3:40 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_90
  92. chicken poop and blood and all of this

    Segment details3:40–3:42 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_91
  93. disgusting gross stuff that was attached

    Segment details3:42–3:45 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_92
  94. to the eggs. You also had to be really

    Segment details3:45–3:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_93
  95. quick because there would be so many eggs

    Segment details3:47–3:49 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_94
  96. coming along, and if you weren't fast

    Segment details3:49–3:51 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_95
  97. enough, the eggs would start falling off

    Segment details3:51–3:53 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_96
  98. the conveyor belt, and then you'd have to

    Segment details3:53–3:54 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_97
  99. press the stop button and then stop the

    Segment details3:55–3:56 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_98
  100. whole system from moving whilst you catch

    Segment details3:56–3:59 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_99
  101. up. My mum was really good at it. She

    Segment details3:59–4:01 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_100
  102. could hold about 3 eggs in each hand and

    Segment details4:02–4:04 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_101
  103. do it really quickly. I wasn't so great.

    Segment details4:04–4:06 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_102
  104. I could manage maybe 2 at most, but even

    Segment details4:06–4:09 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_103
  105. when I tried holding 2 eggs at the same

    Segment details4:09–4:11 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_104
  106. time in each hand, sometimes I would drop

    Segment details4:11–4:14 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_105
  107. the eggs and then it would make a big mess

    Segment details4:14–4:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_106
  108. on the floor, and then I had to clean it

    Segment details4:16–4:17 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_107
  109. up using paper towels. We used to have the

    Segment details4:17–4:20 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_108
  110. radio on playing, and then after a while,

    Segment details4:20–4:23 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_109
  111. these songs that we were listening to on

    Segment details4:23–4:24 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_110
  112. the radio started getting into my head.

    Segment details4:24–4:26 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_111
  113. And then every time I heard these songs,

    Segment details4:27–4:28 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_112
  114. it would trigger that smell of chicken

    Segment details4:29–4:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_113
  115. poop that I could taste in my mouth. It

    Segment details4:31–4:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_114
  116. was really weird. Sometimes it was too

    Segment details4:33–4:35 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_115
  117. much for me and I had to give up after

    Segment details4:35–4:37 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_116
  118. about 2 hours. I just had enough. The

    Segment details4:38–4:39 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_117
  119. smell was too bad, was making me feel

    Segment details4:39–4:41 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_118
  120. sick. I just didn't have the energy to

    Segment details4:41–4:43 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_119
  121. carry on, so I would just go and wait

    Segment details4:43–4:44 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_120
  122. outside in the car whilst I let my mum

    Segment details4:44–4:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_121
  123. finish up on her own. And there was this

    Segment details4:47–4:49 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_122
  124. little boy called William. He must have

    Segment details4:49–4:51 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_123
  125. been about 10, and I think he was the son

    Segment details4:51–4:54 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_124
  126. or grandson of the guy who owned the farm.

    Segment details4:54–4:57 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_125
  127. And then sometimes he would be there and

    Segment details4:57–4:59 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_126
  128. We used to play football together, and

    Segment details4:59–5:02 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_127
  129. that was quite fun. And I did this job for

    Segment details5:02–5:05 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_128
  130. about, I think, a few months only, just

    Segment details5:05–5:07 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_129
  131. for summer holiday. I just couldn't carry

    Segment details5:08–5:09 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_130
  132. on doing it. It was too stressful. I don't

    Segment details5:09–5:11 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_131
  133. know how my mum managed to do it for years

    Segment details5:12–5:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_132
  134. and years and years. So yeah, that was the

    Segment details5:13–5:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_133
  135. story about one of the worst jobs I've

    Segment details5:16–5:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_134
  136. ever had. Sorry if it wasn't very

    Segment details5:18–5:20 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_135
  137. interesting. I thought it would be more

    Segment details5:20–5:22 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_136
  138. interesting, but I guess it wasn't that

    Segment details5:22–5:23 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_137
  139. interesting. What have I been doing

    Segment details5:23–5:26 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_138
  140. recently apart from having a mental

    Segment details5:26–5:28 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_139
  141. breakdown? Not much else. Don't really

    Segment details5:28–5:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_140
  142. know what I want to do with my life. I'm

    Segment details5:31–5:34 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_141
  143. also really struggling to think of what to

    Segment details5:34–5:37 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_142
  144. make for videos. I really have no idea.

    Segment details5:38–5:39 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_143
  145. Really don't feel motivated to do

    Segment details5:40–5:42 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_144
  146. anything. Every day is just like the same.

    Segment details5:42–5:44 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_145
  147. I wake up, play Rainbow Six,

    Segment details5:44–5:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_146
  148. walk around in the garden pacing around

    Segment details5:48–5:50 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_147
  149. like a manic lunatic trying to figure out

    Segment details5:51–5:53 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_148
  150. what I want to do with my Bloody life. I

    Segment details5:54–5:56 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_149
  151. thought I had everything sorted out. I

    Segment details5:56–5:58 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_150
  152. thought for a few months everything was

    Segment details5:58–6:01 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_151
  153. figured out. I knew what I wanted to do.

    Segment details6:01–6:02 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_152
  154. I knew who I wanted to be with. I thought

    Segment details6:03–6:06 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_153
  155. it would be plain sailing. At least the

    Segment details6:06–6:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_154
  156. rest of this year would be. I thought at

    Segment details6:09–6:10 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_155
  157. least the rest of this year, I know what

    Segment details6:10–6:12 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_156
  158. I'm doing. I know what I want to do.

    Segment details6:12–6:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_157
  159. We've got plans. We're going to do this.

    Segment details6:13–6:15 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_158
  160. I'm going to do that. Then all of a

    Segment details6:15–6:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_159
  161. sudden, all gets flushed down the toilet,

    Segment details6:17–6:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_160
  162. and then you're thinking.

    Segment details6:18–6:19 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_161
  163. Well, well, what do I do now? Really,

    Segment details6:22–6:26 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_162
  164. really don't know what to do.

    Segment details6:26–6:28 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_163
  165. Even if there were things I wanted to do,

    Segment details6:30–6:31 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_164
  166. I can't do them now anyway because stupid

    Segment details6:32–6:34 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_165
  167. lockdown is still in place. Shops still

    Segment details6:35–6:36 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_166
  168. aren't opening yet. There are a few things

    Segment details6:37–6:39 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_167
  169. I have to do, like going to the dentist,

    Segment details6:39–6:41 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_168
  170. going to the optician. I thought maybe

    Segment details6:41–6:44 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_169
  171. I'll learn to drive. I don't know if that

    Segment details6:44–6:46 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_170
  172. would really help things. Maybe it would,

    Segment details6:46–6:49 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_171
  173. just seems like a big waste of money to

    Segment details6:49–6:51 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_172
  174. me. I thought maybe I shouldn't keep going

    Segment details6:51–6:54 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_173
  175. on about how I feel and how sad I am

    Segment details6:54–6:56 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_174
  176. because it just sounds kind of lame and

    Segment details6:57–6:58 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_175
  177. pathetic. And then I don't want it to

    Segment details6:58–7:00 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_176
  178. sound like I'm trying to guilt-trip

    Segment details7:01–7:02 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_177
  179. anyone. I would never try and make someone

    Segment details7:03–7:05 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_178
  180. feel guilty, that's just kind of childish.

    Segment details7:05–7:08 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_179
  181. I keep flipping and flopping backwards and

    Segment details7:08–7:11 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_180
  182. forwards between the ideas of, should I go

    Segment details7:11–7:13 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_181
  183. back to Japan and build a life, a

    Segment details7:14–7:16 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_182
  184. temporary life for myself, myself over

    Segment details7:16–7:18 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_183
  185. there since I can never stay very long?

    Segment details7:18–7:19 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_184
  186. Or should I just try and focus on building

    Segment details7:20–7:22 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_185
  187. something in England? Maybe learn to

    Segment details7:22–7:24 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_186
  188. drive, maybe get my own place. Really

    Segment details7:24–7:27 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_187
  189. don't know what to do anymore. I feel like

    Segment details7:27–7:29 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_188
  190. everything I do and try ends up failing.

    Segment details7:30–7:33 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_189
  191. Everything that I've been doing up until

    Segment details7:33–7:35 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_190
  192. now obviously hasn't been working very

    Segment details7:35–7:38 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_191
  193. well, has it? So yeah, I think for now

    Segment details7:38–7:41 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_192
  194. maybe I'll just do more artwork. Type of

    Segment details7:41–7:43 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_193
  195. videos, illustrated videos with a story

    Segment details7:44–7:47 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_194
  196. stuck to it, attached to it. Maybe that

    Segment details7:47–7:51 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_195
  197. would be fine. Well, thanks for listening

    Segment details7:51–7:53 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_196
  198. anyway.

    Segment details7:53–7:53 · rev_615f72837032e6c920336cdfbf6a9d59_197